Everything I Didn't Say

Louis woke with a start, his phone dinged erratically on his bedside table. Groaning the brown haired male rolled over grabbing the mechanical device and switching it to silent through bleary eyes. Pushing it off his mattress he rolled back over closing his eyes not wanting to open them again. Not wanting to enter his reality and see that his girlfriend wasn’t sleeping soundly beside him.

Louis didn’t want to make the trip to see his former partner, he wasn’t sure he was ready to face her. Not yet. He wasn’t sure if he was ready to face the fact that he was a father. A father that left his children.
A stabbing pain twisted in the males gut as he lay thinking over his decisions. Thinking over his life up until now. His instant rise to fame, Eleanor, the tours, the heartbreak and the way that Alexa had helped him through it.

Alexa. He could see her clearly, her warm toothy smile, brown hair that fell to her shoulder blades, her contagious laugh resounded in his mind.
The boys would have loved her.

Alexa and he had met not long after his bitter breakup with Eleanor,she was the first woman he had met that didn’t want her five minutes of fame and genuinely interested in him and helping him get over the break up. She brought out things with him that he had only ever shared with Eleanor.
Seeing it now Louis realised he had been an idiot for breaking it off with her but the brown haired singer had been so worried about tours and the strain that it would put on their relationship. He was the idiot that made the decision to break it off thinking it would be the best for both of them. Thinking that keeping his distance and allowing her to move on was best. In truth he could have done it more tastefully instead of just cutting himself off altogether, but at the time to was what he thought was right.

Louis had never intended for his relationship with Eleanor to revive itself the pop star had honestly thought the two of them were done.
A consistent buzz pulled the singer out his thoughts, rolling over he reached down grabbing his phone that vibrated in the palm of his hands.

“Hello?” his voice was groggy with sleep.

“Louis,” it was Eleanor on the other end, her tone was soft and wavering, as if she was about to burst into tears. The emotion in her voice stirred something inside him and he felt his eyes fill with tears. “Louis you need to go and see her,”

“Why? Why do I need to go and see her?” he asked into the phone knowing that he sounded like a child.

“Because she deserves a proper explanation as to why you left her,” Eleanor was right, Alexa deserved an explanation and Louis knew this, but he didn’t know if he was ready to give it to her. “Louis…” her voice pulled him from his thoughts again.

“Alright, alright, I’m going, I’m going,” the blue eyed singer sighed into the phone rolling over and forcing himself into a sitting position.

“I love you Louis,” Eleanor whispered into the phone.

“I love you too Eleanor.”

“Talk soon,” with that the female ended the call leaving Louis to nothing but silence. Running his hands over his face he pushed himself into a standing position before walking toward the bathroom.



Louis drove through the streets of London as he sought out her house number. He had spent the morning debating whether or not to get her something, chocolates, balloons, flowers. The twins were the same was he supposed to get them something, a soft toy perhaps. In the end he had decided against getting them anything, instead he went empty handed. The truth was what do you get a girl you hadn’t seen for over a year and children you had never met.

Louis found her house, a simple two bedroom flat by the look of it. Rolling to a stop he into the yard that had a few bushes of brightly coloured roses and three patches of different coloured daisies. A small smile spread across his face. Looking further he looked into the windows that were open, he saw a woman with long dark hair sitting on what he assumed was the couch, she seemed to be talking, suddenly from the other side of the room she appeared in the window, she was dressed in a pair of jeans and a red shirt.

Red was her favourite colour.

Just like him, one of the many things the two had in common.

Louis watched as the two woman laughed between one and other, a smile spreading across his face until he saw a male enter the scene, he held a child, a little girl, a warm smile was spread across his face. Alexa walked over to him taking the child from his hold and snuggling her close to her chest.

Louis had been to busy watching Alexa to realise that the male in the window had taken a sudden interest in his car. When Alexa’s eyes met his he quickly ducked down hoping she didn’t see him. Taking several deep breaths he tried to calm his racing heart. Starting the engine he ripped out his park and sped off down the road heading to Eleanor’s, he had to see her.