Fallen Embers

When Sabrina walked into the kitchen, Toby and Beth were already there. "I got to go home, Toby. Now... right now." She said without preamble.

Toby just looked at her, "You know that your album dropped today, right... "

The woman sighed, "Yea, I know, but I have to go home... I need some time to sort through some shit that's going on in my head. You know, like major life decisions. A lot of shit is happening right now, and if I don't work on it, then I'm in deep doggie poo poo."

Toby turned to give his friend his full attention. He saw the look in her eyes, and could see the beginning of a problem developing. Now it was his turn to sigh, "Okay, I can give you till Friday. You have to be back 'cause the Storytellers concert is that night." He relented.

"Thanks Tobe, I need this. More than you know." she turned and walked back to the bedroom while she pulled her phone out to make the call to get her jet ready. Within the hour she was heading back to Elmira-Corning Regional Airport.

As soon as Sabrina landed she quickly unlocked her car and started to 25 minute ride to home. Within no time she was coming up to the white split rail fence that announced the beginning of her property. She drove along and turned into the driveway and went through the gates and towards the main house.

Henry was outside with one of the stable hands watching the grooming of one of the younger horses when he heard an engine and glanced up. He recognized Sabrina's truck and wondered with a frown what she was doing home. She was supposed to be in New York City for another few weeks yet. When she stopped the truck and got out and started walking over towards him.

As she got closer he could see that something was eating at her. Aside from Chris and Toby, he had known Sabrina the longest and he just knew when something was upsetting her and something was in a big way right now. He spoke to the stable hand who took the horse he was grooming back into the barn as Sabrina got closer.

"Hey Henry," Sabrina said in greeting.

"Want to go for a ride youngen?" the older man asked his ward.

"Yea, Henry. How did you know?"

"I have known you since you were 12 young lady, I know that look by now."

Sabrina smiled at her guardian fondly. "I guess you're right, Henry. I just need to talk... "

"I know, Sabrina. I know." He said gently.

The stable hand returned with two horses that were saddled up and ready to go. Sabrina smiled at the hand and took the larger of the two horses. Henry walked the smaller horse over to a large stone and stepped up to mount. Within minutes the two were guiding their mounts through a field and back towards the 'back 40'.

They rode along in compatible silence as the horses walked along the grassy trail through the pasture. Sabrina always enjoyed these rides ever since they first started to take them when she was just a child. This was their time together, the time that they shared feelings and thoughts. Most of the early farm decisions were made during these rides.

"So what happened in New York?" Henry asked breaking the silence.

Sabrina sighed, "Tre and I talked."

"And?"

"I don't know Henry; he says one thing and then does something else completely. He tells me he still loves me, but then in the same sentence says he can't be with me. I can handle that, but he wants to be friends with benefits, and I don't know if that a good idea."

She paused to look at the older man, he didn't say anything but nodded for her to go on. "I'm split on that idea. On one hand I don't want to for the reason that it's not a healthy relationship. On the other hand, I want to do it cause for that one moment in time... he's with me... loves me. The problem is I can feel it already, it will kill my soul... but the scary thing is... I'm willing to do that; kill my soul just for that small moment of not being alone."

She hung her head and Henry could see the tears leaking out from her eyes. He knew that Tre meant the world to her and she would give anything to be with him. "I can't tell you what to do, Sabrina. All I can do is be here for you and support what decision you make. I love you; you are like a daughter to me. I was okay with the fact that June and I didn't have children of our own. When you came into our life, I knew you would turn our world upside down. June was her happiest I had ever seen her the day we signed the guardian paperwork. I love you Sabrina, I'm proud of you; just follow your heart." The woman just nodded her head and they continued their ride in silence. The two didn't need any more words between them.

Sabrina spent the new two days working at the farm, getting her head straight and starting to feel better. She had made her decision and she was accepting her fate in this world. Toby called her and told her that 'Rebirth' debuted at number 1 and the primarily stats showed that it was on track to go platinum by the end of the week. He could hear the defeat in her voice and knew that things were not going to go well for the woman in her personal life. He just hoped that she could hold it together and not lose it.

The woman returned to the city for the Storytellers concert. The question and answer part before the concert wasn't too bad, the questions were not unlike ones she had answered before. The concert part went off without a hitch, and the fans really enjoyed the new sound and songs that Sabrina and the band performed.

The next day brought Sabrina and friends to the west coast for promotion of the CD out there. Sabrina decided to open up the Oakland house in order to be closer to Frankito and Ramona who was spending summer vacation with her father. Beth stayed with Sabrina in Oakland and the two women spent a lot of time getting to know each other and sight seeing the Bay area. When duty called, they flew down to LA to do whatever was needed and then they would hop back to Oakland. A comfortable routine began to show and Sabrina thrived in that kind of environment.

One day in the beginning of August, everyone was at Sabrina's house for a summer party. All of Green Day and their families along with Sabrina's band and their families gathered to celebrate the winding down of summer. Sabrina had hired a housekeeper for the day to take care of the food and whatnot, so everyone could relax and not worry about anything.

The party was in full swing when a couple of police officers were shown into the back yard by the housekeeper. The people glanced at the employee pointing out Sabrina and then watched the officers' move toward the woman in question. Sabrina glanced up and saw the men in uniform and walked over to meet them, "May I help you officers?" she asked.

"Are you Sabrina Wright?" one of them asked her.

"Yes, has there been a complaint?"

"No ma'am, we were contacted by the Schuyler County Sheriff's office."

"What? Schuyler County? Why would they contact you?" she asked starting to get nervous.

"Ma'am we regret to inform you, there was an incident at The Hopeful Farm about an hour ago."

Sabrina felt her knees go weak. Toby and Tre had moved over to stand by her when the officers started to talk to her. Toby quickly grabbed Sabrina and placed his arms around her shoulder to help her stand upright. He could feel her heart pounding out of her chest at the words the officer was saying, "A stable hand found Henry Daley face down in the corridor of one of the barns. He immediately called 911 and began to perform CPR. When the paramedics arrived, Mr. Daley was without a heartbeat and pronounced dead at the scene. I am sorry Ms. Wright to bring you the bad news."

"No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!" Sabrina cried out as she fell to her knees. "No, not Henry... "

Tre moved toward his ex-wife when he heard a wail come from behind him, Ramona had heard what happened and was crying herself. Torn between his love and his daughter; he saw Mike and Beth joining Toby to help get Sabrina upright, so he turned and knelt down and opened his arms to his daughter.

Sabrina stood next to her partner and cousin Chris inside the doors of the stallion barn. They were not dressed to be in that environment, but dressed appropriately for what was going to take place in a little while. Chris looked uncomfortable in the black suit and tie he was in. His shiny shoes stood out against the dirt of the ground by the entrance of the barn. His shoulders shook as he began to cry one more time for the man that was the only father he could ever remember.

Sabrina moved over to where Chris was standing and wrapped her arm around her cousin. She pulled him into her and held him as he cried. "It's okay Chris, we get through this... somehow." She whispered into his check. The man nodded his head and wiped his eyes with the sleeve of the jacket.

"I now, but it gonna be hard." He paused and swallowed back more tears. "Your silk, I hope I didn't ruin it."

Sabrina glanced down to what she was wearing. The original jockey jersey from the very first race covered her upper half. The black silk gleamed in the light filtering in from the outside. Her cream jodhpurs and black knee high riding boots completed Sabrina's own way of honoring the man who mentored her. "It's okay... "

Chris chuckled a bit, "I'm surprised it still fits Sabrina."

It was Sabrina's turn to absently nod as she turned to look out across the yard and glance at the crowd milling around by the pond. This was what Henry wanted, the way he wanted it; a gathering of his friends to celebrate his life. Her gaze flitted over the people; Henry's peers from the horse world, his friends and her own friends mingled and remembered the man being honored. She found Tre; who was with Lisea and Ramona. The young girl took Henry's death hard since she was learning the craft from him and had spent many a weekends with the older man. Her face was red and swollen from crying and Sabrina's heart went out to her. She moved her head to look at Tre who happen to glance her way. He raised a hand to her and smiled a sad smile that didn't reach his eyes. She nodded and turned her attention back to Chris.

Ten minutes later, all the people were seated and awaiting Sabrina and Chris to arrive. They grasped each others' hands and walked out of the barn and toward the pond. They made quite a pair; two grown adults, mourning a father figure. They soon covered the distance to the pond where seating was situated under the trees. Two large pictures of Henry stood on either side of a small table which held an urn. The picture on the right showed Henry, Chris and Sabrina top of a horse in the winner's circle. The woman smiled at that memory; it was from way back in 1979, when she just 16. It was the first race they had won. She looked at the other picture which was of Henry as he was, a dignified older man that held a twinkle in his eye.

When the pair moved past the first row of people, Sabrina stopped in front of Ramona. She bent to kneel down in front of the girl, "Henry loved you Ramona... more than you know." Sabrina whispered with a kiss to the check that was wet with tears.

Sabrina arose and went to stand next to Chris who was behind a podium that held a mic. A small sound system had been set up to be able to hear the proceedings over Mother Earth's chorus of sounds. Horses snorted and whinnied, insects buzzed, and the tree's leaves were alive with the gentle breeze.

"Thank you all for coming," Chris began in a shaky voice. Sabrina grasped his hand for support as he continued. "We are here to celebrate the life of Henry Daley. He was an accomplished horse trainer and business owner. He was a father figure to me and Sabrina when we needed someone. He... " Chris broke off with a choked sob. Sabrina nodded to Tanya, Chris' wife to help her move the man to a chair, where he collapsed into sobs.

Sabrina squared her shoulders; she knew that for Chris she had to be strong. She knew that if she let the pain out of her tightly controlled grasp, she herself would be done for. She moved to where Chris was standing and continued, "I remember when I was 12. It was Christmas time and Chris and I were in separate foster homes. Christmas came and I sat in my room that I shared with the four other foster daughters in the house. I was staring out the window and noticed for the first time that the property next door had a barn and a small paddock. The largest horse I had ever seen was galloping around the enclosed space. A small man followed the horse with a halter in his hand. He was trying to get the halter on the horse, but that big brute was not having it." Sabrina smiled at the memory of Henry puffing around the pasture trying to catch that horse.

"He finally gave up and walked away. I spent most of the day watching that horse. Christmas morning after opening a gift of a Barbie doll, which certainly not the skateboard I had asked for; I ran up to the room and stared out the window hoping for a glance of the horse. I saw the little man again with the halter trying to get the horse to wear it. The horse galloped around the man and suddenly charged at him. I saw the man fall into the snow and quickly get up and walk out of the paddock. Something came over me as I grabbed my jacket to go down to yard and over to the fence. The horse saw me and trotted over. I just started talking to him in a low voice; I think I was introducing myself or something like that." She laughed.

"Soon the horse let me climb under the rails and into the paddock. I walked over to the fallen halter and grabbed it. The horse stood there as I placed it over his head. I heard a voice behind me, 'How did you do that? I have been trying for weeks.' and that was the first time I met Henry Daley."

"By the summer of next year, he and his wife June became our legal guardians. Chris was only 6 and Henry and June were the only people Chris remembered to be father and mother." She paused as she took a sip of water from the bottle that was underneath the podium. "Over the years, Henry was the only thing in my life that was reliable and constant. When ever I came home to heal, he was always right there with a shoulder and a kind word and ready to go for one of our rides to talk about what was going on. I was lucky enough to have one final ride a few weeks ago. We said a lot of things to each other, things that we never talked about before. I will cherish that ride for the rest of my life."

The woman closed her eyes and willed the tears away. "Now is the part where if anyone would like to share a memory of Henry... " she said when she got control of herself. They listened and reminisced with the folks that shared their Henry stories. When everyone seemed to have had their say, Sabrina saw Ramona tug on her Dad's sleeve and point to the podium. He nodded and she rose from her chair and went to stand to speak. She wasn't tall enough to be seen so Tre jumped up and grabbed the mic for her so she could stand next to the podium. Sabrina saw the tears running down the young girl's face.

Her heart broke into a thousand pieces with the words that came out of the child's mouth, "He let me call him Grandpa... "