The Lunacy Fringe

Later on, Felix walked me back home. We said goodbye at the front door with a long kiss, and then I headed inside to watch Frosty the Snowman with my dad. He didn't ask why I'd taken so long, and I didn't elaborate. I was perfectly happy letting him believe we'd spent the last thirty minutes talking things through instead of flirting and making out.

Felix was gone by the time the sun came up the next morning. My dad and I had our own Christmas with just the two of us and then headed to Crystal's house after breakfast to do it all over again.

I didn't see Felix again until New Year's Eve. I didn't know when he'd be home, and he hadn't been able to call due to long distance. So I didn't bother to wake up early. I came downstairs and found my dad home for his lunch break.

"Hey, Dad," I said, shuffling toward the kitchen. He squinted at me in my pajamas.

"Good morning. You always wake up this late when I'm at work?" I grinned.

"Maybe."

He shook his head and rolled his eyes. I went to the kitchen to make breakfast. I had just settled on cereal when the phone rang.

"You wanna get that?" my dad called from the living room.

"Yeah, sure!" I pressed the phone against my ear and tried to balance to pour myself a bowl.

"Hey," Felix said after I answered.

"Hey. Did you just get home?"

"Yeah, a few minutes ago. I wanted to see what you were up to, but I saw your dad's truck in the driveway."

"Well, I'm making breakfast."

"At noon?"

"Listen," I started. "I was tired." He just laughed.

"I've just been up since two in the morning, and it seems like the whole day is almost over already. But I have a question for you."

"Shoot."

"One of my friends in Long Beach is throwing a party tonight. Do you maybe wanna come?"

"Are you asking me to be your date?"

"That's exactly what I'm asking."

"Let me just run it by my dad. Hold on." I poked my head out into the living room. "Hey, Dad? Is it cool if I go to a party in Long Beach tonight?" He looked up at me, mouth full of sandwich.

"Who are you going with?"

"Billie."

"Liar," Felix said. I ignored him.

"Are you going to spend the night?" my dad asked.

"It's New Year's Eve, so I'm guessing so," I replied. I put the phone back to my ear. "Are we spending the night?"

"I plan to get completely shitfaced wasted, so probably," he admitted.

"Yes." My dad considered this for a moment and then sighed. Probably coming to the conclusion that I was a legal adult and was only really asking because I wasn't a habitual rule breaker.

"I guess it's fine," he decided. "Just—make sure you leave me an address and a phone number just in case there's an emergency. And make sure you call me when you get there. It's not a short drive, and if Billie is anything like Quinn…." He shook his head at the thought.

"I can drive too, you know?"

"That doesn't make me feel any better."

"Hey." I heard Felix laugh.

"When are you leaving?"

"Well, I'm going to take a nap, and I want to be on the road by two," Felix answered for me.

"Soon," I told my dad.

"Alright. Well, have fun. Call me if you need anything," he decided.

"Thanks, Dad." I returned to the kitchen and sat down with my cereal. "He said it's cool."

"Awesome," Felix muttered before yawning.

"Who else is going to be there?"

"Not anyone you know, unfortunately."

"No Quinn?"

"I think he was going to a concert tonight. You might want to call Billie to cover our bases, though."

"Sounds like fun."

"I'll let you get back to your breakfast, and I'll be by when I wake up."

"Okay. Talk to you later."

"Miss you, Beautiful." I laughed.

"Bye, Billie." He just snorted and disconnected.

I was upstairs in my room getting ready when the doorbell finally rang. I ran down to get it, pulled it open, and jumped right into his arms. I'd been waiting patiently since my dad left. But I didn't want to bother him if he was tired.

"Damn—you miss me that much?" he asked, squeezing me. I nodded.

"Mm-hmm. Come in." I pulled him back up to my room. "So what should I bring?"

"Basic overnight stuff. Change of clothes, something sexy, toothbrush. That Kind of stuff." I nodded.

"Gotcha." I got to work stuffing things into my bag, and he sat on the chair.

"So about that something sexy."

"Did you have something in mind?"

"I vividly remember a silver top you wore to a party when you weren't speaking to me."

"The disco top. Billie's responsible for that one."

"I'll have to thank her later." I went to the closet to pull it out. It was a slinky silver halter top. Worn without a bra.

"This one?" I pulled it out to show him, and he whistled low, hands behind his head.

"Perfect."

I rolled my eyes and then decided to change right then and there. I pulled my shirt off and tossed it at his face. By the time he got it off, I'd already pulled off my bra. But I was covering myself with my arm. So he reached out as if to pull it away. I jumped back.

"On second thought, we can just stay here," he suggested.

"My dad will be home in a few hours."

"We'll be done by then."

"And at midnight tonight, where do you want to be? Home, alone, in your bed with your fingers missing? Or with me in Long Beach, all fingers intact?" He leaned back again and sighed.

"Fine." I turned my back on him to put the top on. Then I shimmied out of my jeans. When I turned back to him, his head was cocked to the side.

"You're enjoying this way too much." He smiled crookedly.

"If I wasn't so caught up on the idea of being with you at midnight, I'd say to hell with this party." I pulled on another pair of jeans and then reached for my sweater. "You ready?"

"I am if you are."

He took my bag, and we headed downstairs to write my dad a note with the address. I'd already talked to Billie. She begged for answers, and I just told her some hot guy asked me to a party. Then she laughed and said, "You're talking about Felix, aren't you?"

Felix was using his mom's car again since she was off for New Year's. We got onto the freeway, music blasting as the sun began to creep toward the ocean. I leaned my head against Felix's shoulder, and he turned slightly to kiss me on the top of my head.

"I'm glad you're coming with me," he said.

"Me too."

It was already dark by the time we reached his friend's house. The party was already getting underway, so we left the bags in the car, and Felix took my hand to lead me inside. There was a keg in the living room, and no one approached us when we entered. So we went to find a cup.

"To you," he said, lifting his drink.

"To you," I replied. Then we drank. And finally, someone spotted us.

"Hey, Felix," he said, appearing out of the crowd and pulling Felix in for a friendly man hug. "Glad you came."

"Hey, man," Felix said. "This is my girlfriend, Ruby." It was the first time he'd ever called me that. I moved past the moment of shock and smiled.

"Nice to meet you, Ruby."

"You too."

"You guys go ahead and make yourselves at home. I got your room set up upstairs. It's locked, so no one can make themselves comfortable. Here's the key." He handed it over to Felix. I waited for him to leave before turning to Felix. My boyfriend, apparently.

"What exactly are your intentions with me, Mr. Kanellis?" I asked. He pulled me in close and nuzzled my neck.

"I plan to remove that tiny shirt you're wearing."

"Well, at least you're honest."

"I'm modest, too, because I plan to do a lot more than that." I sipped my beer and laughed.

"What about what I plan to do?" I asked. Then I turned and walked away. But he quickly caught up with me and spun me back into his arms, spilling my beer over my hand.

"Oh, you're a tease." He kissed me quickly on the lips. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders to kiss him harder.

I didn't realize just how many friends Felix had outside of school. He spent so much time with Quinn and the band that it didn't occur to me that he knew people all the way in Long Beach. But apparently, the guy whose house we were at was a former student at our school who had moved away long before I showed up. Felix was the only one who really kept in touch with him and used to come to the beach every other weekend to hang out with him and his new friends. So we walked around talking to all the people he knew. He introduced me as his girlfriend to every single one of them.

At a half-hour to midnight, he left me with a group of nice girls who'd tried to befriend me and promptly disappeared. But then the girls all disappeared one by one, and I found myself alone in the kitchen. I was leaning against the wall because a different group of girls had taken over the table. The girls at the table didn't look nearly as friendly as the others. I could hear them gossiping about people. I considered joining them at first. Until I noticed they kept glancing at me and whispering to themselves. I figured it was only a matter of time before they said something.

"So," one girl finally said, leaning back in her chair to get a good look at me. "You're Felix's new fling." I smiled.

"Fling, sure."

"How long have you guys—been a thing?"

"Seven months or so." I wasn't about to explain that we'd been apart for ninety percent of that time. But still. It was a significant amount of time to be in love with the same person. She must have agreed because her eyebrows rose in shock.

"Seven months, really?" I nodded. "Wow, I don't think he's ever had a girlfriend that long before." I shrugged.

"Maybe he just likes me." She smiled like I was a silly little girl who didn't know any better. But then Felix appeared in the doorway, obviously looking for me. He lit up when he spotted me by the wall.

"Hey, there you are," he said, coming right up to retake my hand.

"Hey."

"So, Felix," the girl said. He turned and finally noticed her. His grip went tight, and he took a sip of beer.

"Yeah?"

"Have you guys really been together seven months?"

"Yep."

"Kind of a long time for you, huh? You're usually more of a seven-day kind of guy." He smiled.

"I don't know," he said. "I guess it's different when you actually love someone." My heart leaped again. I did my best not to look shocked, but I couldn't stop the smile.

"Love, really? Not your usual style."

"I don't really see how you'd know that, to be honest. Unless you're basing your assumption on rumors from people who also wouldn't know."

"Tara is my sister. She tells me everything." He shrugged.

"And Tara doesn't know me as well as she thinks she does." Then he took my hand and pulled me out of the kitchen. I waited until we were far enough away from them to speak.

"What the hell?" I asked. He turned back to me, stopping in the crowded living room.

"It figures that I'd leave you alone for five minutes, and the wolves get to you," he remarked.

"Did you sleep with that girl?"

"You want the truth?"

"Always." His green eyes searched my face.

"I didn't. But I did with her sister. They both hate me because we broke up. I was with her for three months before we ever got around to it. I was a virgin and thought I was in love with her. But we lived in different towns and went to different schools. I found out she was cheating on me. She doesn't know that I know. I let her believe what she wanted. She apparently chose to believe I was fucking everyone from here to Oceanside and got bored with her."

"You were in love with her?" He shook his head and smiled.

"No. God, no. She did me a favor. But I was fifteen, and it was the first real relationship I'd ever had. The first girl I ever slept with. I was younger and naive and thought I wanted to be with her forever. But you know how that is, don't you? You had a boyfriend when you moved here. Didn't you think it would be forever once too?" I nodded slowly.

"Yeah, I suppose so. I get it. It just caught me off guard, is all. I'm not really used to strangers being hostile toward me because of my boyfriend." He smiled.

"Boyfriend?" I rolled my eyes.

"You said it first." He leaned forward and kissed me. But he looked serious again when he stepped back.

"People lie about me because it makes it easier for them. The whole thing with Quinn escalated at school, and people love drama. Literally, everyone knows about it. And I guess it was easier for them to think I was to blame than she or Quinn. Quinn was a goofy, innocent kid, and she was a straight-a student who never got into any trouble. And look at me. I don't exactly come off as sweet and innocent, and I sure as hell don't act like it. And now it comes up every single fucking time I go out with someone. But—it's not true—none of it. I never would have done that to Quinn, and I don't get bored. I just don't believe in wasting my time on someone I don't care about." I nodded slowly.

"Is that what happened with us? Was I a waste of time?" His expression softened again.

"Ruby, no. Of course not. You just...." He shifted nervously like he didn't want to admit whatever he was going to say. "You're just everything I've ever wanted, and I started to fall in love. So I just panicked. I just don't want a repeat of what happened with Tara."

"I'm not like that." He reached out to pinch my chin and smiled.

"I know. And that scares me too. Because if this doesn't work out between us—it's gonna hurt like hell, isn't it?" I nodded slowly.

"Yeah—It will." He let me go.

"I used to hang out here a lot. I should have known we'd run into one of her friends, if not her and her sister."

"She's not here, is she?"

"Not as far as I know. But I'll warn you if I spot her."

"I appreciate it."

"I wasn't lying about what I told her, Ruby. I don't know what it is between us or why I feel the way I do. But…," he sighed deeply and looked around the room, clearly embarrassed again, "this is going to be really cheesy, okay? So give me a free pass?"

"You got it."

"It feels like you're the other half of my heart."

It really was cheesy. But I pulled him to me and kissed him until my lips tingled.

At exactly midnight, we were still in the living room. As soon as the clock struck twelve, counted down by everyone in the house, he took my face in his hands and kissed me. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, and we stayed just like that for the entire minute. The rest of the house celebrated and made as much noise as humanly possible. When he finally pulled away, he kissed the side of my head so he could whisper in my ear. He told me it was good luck.

We didn't want to stay down there much longer after that. He took my hand and pulled me up the stairs to the guest room in his wealthy friend's house. We locked ourselves in the room and then turned to each other. It was dark, and there was a sliding glass door with a balcony that looked out over the pool. I could still hear the boom of music and voices outside. But they were muted now, and the pool sent shimmering blue lights all over the walls.

We were both drunk but not quite wasted, and we'd already mutually decided early in the day that we were going to take advantage of being alone. His lips found mine in the dim blue light. We started slow and soft, but then he pulled off my sweater and kissed a line along my neck and shoulder. I slid my hands around his front to unbutton his jeans.

My heart was pounding because it was the first time we'd been together like this since that morning after Winter Formal. But it was just as perfect as the first time. A little less painful. A little sweeter. And when I watched him fall asleep later, bathed in the shimmering blue glow, I thought about how much I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.

I just hoped it didn't turn out the same way it had with Randy, Tara, or anyone else before them. It already felt different, but I'd given him more than I'd ever given anyone else. And even though I'd wanted to love other people, I knew for sure that it was the first time I was really, truly, in love.