It's Gonna Be My Year

When we woke up breakfast was ready (for real this time). I noticed that Jack had bags under his eyes still and I wondered if he lied about how long he’d been awake for. I decided to make him have a nap in the car later as we were getting close to San Francisco. I was really fucking excited to see the Golden Gate Bridge. And mainly just the west coast in general as we hadn’t really been there much.

My parents weren’t in a rush today so after breakfast Jack and I went for a walk in a nearby park. It was only 8 so there weren’t many people around and the quiet was nice, especially after New Orleans. Jack and I had fallen into a silence as well but it was a comfortable one so I was ok with it. I was feeling comfortable and Jack looked like he was too so I thought now would be a good time for some questions. I guided Jack over to a bench and turned so we were facing each other.

“Jack?” I asked hesitantly. I didn’t really know if I was seeing something that wasn’t there but I could tell he’d been up for hours before he woke me up.

“Yeah, what’s up?” Jack asked with concern. Of course he could tell that something was wrong. He could always tell. I decided to just go with it.

“Why, uh, why were you so worried about waking me up last night? Or well I guess it was this morning but like do I scare you, or, or something?” I stammered out. God I hoped he wasn’t scared of me. I was trying to take him away from all that shit and if I was scaring him… I would kinda be a crappy boyfriend.

Jack’s face just sort of shut down instantly. Oh god. What did I do? What do I do? Why do I scare him? I thought I was ok. Why?

“It’s because of my Dad.” Jack stated. It was a very final statement, and as I wasn’t expecting it, I was startled out of my panic. I squeezed his hand as he continued. He looked so sad and I wanted to kidnap him and take him into isolation forever, where no one could hurt him. But you can’t do that because it’s “illegal” and “unethical”. Ugh. Adults and their rules.

“It was about 7 years ago. I was 8 and had just had a nightmare. It was the first one since, uh, since my Mom left and I went to Dad’s room, thinking I could sleep with him you know. That’s what I’d always done and they always let me. So I walked into his room and woke him up. Thing is he’d just gotten to sleep after drinking a bottle of whiskey. I told him about my nightmare. How it was about Mom leaving and how I was afraid he would leave too and I remember standing there while he just stared at me. When I asked ‘Can I sleep with you?’ he just went off his head.” Jack explained. Still calm as anything. Then his breathing hitched and he continued on to the next part of the story.

“He shoved me into his side table drawer and I got a nice big scratch on my back. It’s still there. He started yelling at me. Saying it was, it was my fault that M-Mom abandoned us and that m-my siblings’ l-l-left us. It was my f-fault! My fault! I d-didn’t mean t-to Alex, I-I swear. I-I promise I didn’t. D-Don’t leave m-me too.”

Jack was sobbing now and mumbling things incoherently into my shirt. I just held onto him tightly and whispered:

“I’ll never leave you baby. I promise I’ll never leave. It wasn’t your fault ok baby? It wasn’t your fault.”

How could I have asked him a question that caused him this much grief? I am a terrible boyfriend.

Rian’s POV
The bell for lunch had just rung and all the students were running around collecting all the things they’d need for winter break. I just sighed. I feel so alone. Not that I can really complain. I’m just glad ‘Jalex’, as Zack and I had taken to calling them, were happy and away from all this bullshit. The school was still talking about them.

Poor Jack. He has had a pretty crappy life so far. I can’t believe he never skipped any classes. Alex had told me a little of what had happened and I was glad that I had such a good family life compared to him. To the both of them actually. I just can’t believe Jack’s mom had ditched him like that. And that his brothers and sisters had just up and left too. And Alex’s brother was a psychopath.
Hopefully this holiday would do them good.

I went to the cafeteria and ate my lunch at our table by myself. I used to be teased because I sat by myself but now that Alex had come and declared this as our spot and me as his friend no one would say anything to me, in fear of him. I have to say from experience that he was pretty kick ass. Seeing him fight was awe inspiring and terrifying and the same time. The same feeling I get when we’ve just finished playing an original song. Except I feel pretty kick ass too.

The bell rang and I walked to class slowly. I had tons of time. I’d already taken what I’d need from my locker and I was seriously ready to go home and play video games for the next 2 weeks. Because it was the last lesson neither the students nor teachers could be bothered to do any work so our French teacher just put on some Disney princess movie in French.

The final bell rang and thank God because that movie was worse in French than it was in English. I started to walk out into the parking lot when I was stopped by a girl. She was the same height as me, which really isn’t that tall because I’m a midget, and had long black curly hair and dark brown eyes. Her skin was the same colour as Jack’s which made me think she might have people in her family from the Middle East too.

“Hello,” She started politely. “Are you Rian Dawson?”

“Uh yeah, and who are you?” I asked warily. I’d never seen this girl before and I didn’t think my parents would know her, she’s too young.

“My name is May. I heard you were friends with my brother,” She said.
“Who’s your brother?” I asked, dread curling in my stomach.

“Jack. Jack Barakat.”

Well. Shit.