It's Gonna Be My Year

"Uh, Alex?" Jack asked nervously. I realised I must have zoned out a little bit. Whoops. I turned to him to try and explain what had happened.

"Uh. When I-I was uh, 12, my uh brother purposely overdosed on drugs. He survived and um, he ran away from the hospital the day he was a-admitted. I don't know if he is still alive or tried to commit again, but uh I just hope he's ok. Wherever he is."

Jack just stared at me for a little while before moving his arms around my neck and pulling me into a hug. And I couldn't tell you how much it meant to me.

2 MONTHS LATER

The bell rang for lunch and we went to the cafeteria and sat down at our usual table. I felt a bit better that I had told Jack something about myself. I mean I still didn't explain the whole story but I felt like I had gotten some of the weight off of my chest. Jack, Rian and I just talked about what we wanted to pursue as a career. Apparently we all wanted to be in a band, and we could almost make one too! I was a singer and guitarist, Jack was one of the best guitarists ever (no I was NOT fucking bias) and Rian is a pretty fantastic drummer. We just needed a bassist. Unfortunately none of us knew any bassists so we were kinda stuck until we found one.

The bell rang once again and we set off to class. I was excited about the idea we could bring a band together. I know Jack was even more excited than I was. I also really thought we could make it too! We were all quite talented, well Rian and Jack are great and my skills were ok I guess, but hopefully their music would be able to distract people from my voice.

"Hey Jack?" I whispered. I'm sure our geography teacher was talking about something that she found important, but I really couldn't be bothered to listen to that shit at the moment.

"Yeah," he whispered back. Apparently Jack was bored too. Let's just say I would be surprised if anyone found this interesting considering it's a documentary on sand. SAND! Who the fuck is gonna use this in their lives? I'd kinda like to meet them and ask what on earth they are thinking.

"Uh, would you like to, um, come to my house?" Come on Alex, quit stuttering! "To, uh, to like practise some songs?"

"Oh my god yes! I just have to get my guitar from my house first. See you there at four?" Jack replied excitedly. God he looked so cute at the moment. He was looking much happier these past couple of weeks than he did when I first met him. He didn't have any more bruises, his eyes had this sparkling quality to them that made them light up whenever he was happy and he wasn't as down looking anymore. He just wasn't walking as slumped and he had a bit of a jump in his step and I was happy to know I had contributed in some small way. Especially since the bullies hadn't really bothered us anymore, they just sent us nasty looks and if they did do anything then I made sure they went home with fucking bruises.

After school Jack came round to my house and we played some of our favourite Blink songs. I was overjoyed because I think we had a real chance at this band. Jack and I sounded great together and I couldn't wait to practise with Rian and see how we sounded together. We had just finished playing 'All the Small Things' and were staring at each other in awe. I couldn't believe Jack was that good at guitar! I mean that's really unfair that he's that gifted. No one should be this talented, especially when coupled with that amazing body I really wanted to touch. Ok Alex, stop this train of thought!

"Jack! You were so good! How long have you been playing?" I asked excitedly. I really wanted this band to happen.

"Um, 6 years," he whispered.

"Wow," I said under my breath. That means he has been playing since he was 8! I'd been playing since I was 8 and I was nearly 15. We'd almost been playing the same amount of time and he was way better than me! He must be really dedicated to his guitar. Then again, I can see the care he takes when he plays it.

"You were really good Alex. I really like your voice." His voice broke through my reverie and I was a little startled. He liked my voice? Was he just saying that to be nice or...?

"Thanks Jack, I don't really know how you can think that but thank you."

"You don't think you sound good?" He asked dubiously, like he thought I was joking, and I have to say that kinda set my heart soaring.

"Well, you're the only person that's heard me sing."

"Really? Well Alex you were amazing, and you are now my favourite singer. I think you might even be beating Thomas DeLonge."

I was shocked, I never thought someone could think that about me. Oh my fucking god I think I was about to start hyperventilating. My crush just said that I was his favourite singer! And that he likes my voice better than Thomas fucking Delonge's! I really felt like squealing like a fangirl but figured I could calm down enough to say thank you. Then it occurred to me he was probably joking. I felt my face fall and I was pretty sure Jack could see it too. It was then I realised that Jack had been watching me through my whole freak out.

He slid closer to me, taking his guitar off on the way. He came and took my guitar too. I couldn't really move because I was just feeling sad. He was just teasing me, my voice probably sounded like shit. If I thought it sounded bad, then everyone else probably did too. He sat down next to me and hugged me. He then leaned forward to whisper in my ear

"Alex I wasn't joking. You're honestly the best singer I've ever heard, and I listen to a lot of good singers," he chuckled to himself a little bit and I felt myself laugh too. I moved my arms to wrap around his waist and he kept talking. "Your voice is one of the most beautiful and wonderful things I've ever heard, and I would probably fall in love with it if I wasn't falling for someone else."

I felt my heart break. Shatter. I had really been falling for Jack. I took in a breath about to smile and tell him that I'm sure he'd get whoever it was and they would be lucky to have him. But Jack pulled back and said "Scratch that, I am falling in love with it because I'm falling for the guy with the most beautiful voice on this earth."

It took me a second to realise that Jack was talking about me. HE WAS FUCKING TALKING ABOUT ME! MEEE! I let my inner fangirl out and squealed a little but before guiding my face to his and kissing him full on the lips. This was my first kiss and I thought I was doing ok. I pulled back and whispered "I'm falling for you too Jack."

He initiated the kiss this time and it was just as magical as the first. I'm glad that my first kiss was Jack Barakat. His tongue swiped my lips and I opened them to do that whole "properly kissing" thing. God Jack was so good at this. I moaned and when his tongue touched mine for the first time I think my heart exploded.