From the Shadows

Teagan found Daryl already laying on the bed with his legs stretched out and his hands behind his head. When he saw Teagan enter the room, he sat up, hanging his legs over the side of the bed.

“They asleep?” Daryl grunted.

“Just about. They at least all went to their rooms. They are far enough away, though. Should still be fairly quiet up here.” Teagan sat down next to Daryl and took her shoes off. She looked over at Daryl to see him staring at her. Teagan laughed. “What?”

Damn, she's beautiful. Should I-? Might be too weird. Maybe if I-... Daryl leaned over and kissed Teagan before he could change his mind. It was stiff. Teagan could feel how nervous Daryl was. When they pulled away, a soft smile spread across Teagan's face. They kissed again, both leaning in. The kisses were soft, and short. It took them a few tries to land one properly. Daryl moved his hand to her leg, and she quickly moved her hand to his, lacing fingers. The kisses became more wet and aggressive. Their breaths quickened, and they didn't stop to look at each other between kisses anymore. Daryl roughly grabbed Teagan's wrist and pinned it next to her body. He braced his weight to barely hover over Teagan. He kissed her hard on the mouth, and moved his lips over her cheek and neck, moving down her collarbone.

Teagan's hands began to shake. As Daryl's movements became more rough, and as she started to lose more control, she began to panic. His rough hands over her exposed skin sent a sharp tingle down her spine. Her breath became short and fast. She closed her eyes and tried to shut out the image fighting to break into her memory. Her heart was racing. All she could hear was the pounding of her blood in her ears. Although her hands felt like ice, she felt fevered, and began to sweat. She tried to speak, but nothing came out. Her whole body began to shake. A soft, panicked squeak of a word slipped from her mouth as Daryl started to lift her shirt. “Wait.”

He could barely hear it. Daryl stopped immediately and looked up at Teagan. Her eyes her shut and he could see her shaking. Did she say somethin' before? He got off of Teagan and sat next to her. He gently guided her up to a sitting position. “What's wrong?” He knew asking if things were okay was a waste of breath. He knew her body language pretty well by now.

“Y-yeah just um...” Her breathing hadn't slowed. Her hands were still shaking. Daryl carefully moved his hand to hers, barely touching it. He gave her the option to hold his hand or not. She did, and she gripped it tight. “Just give me a minute.” She tried to ease her breathing. She opened her eyes and tried to nod reassuringly at Daryl. He didn't believe her.

“If you don't want ta do this we don't-”

“No, it's fine. Just...” She felt tears form behind her eyes. She let go over Daryl's hand and covered her eyes so he couldn't see her cry.

“Teagan, listen ta me. We don't have ta do anythin' you don't want to. Understand?” His voice was soft and caring.

“I'm s-sorry.” She breathed heavily to choke back tears.

“Ain't nothin' ta be sorry for. I shoulda asked.” His words almost sounded disappointed. Shoulda seen it sooner. Daryl wrapped an arm around Teagan and lightly rubbed her shoulder. Her shaking had nearly stopped, and her breathing had slowed.

After a few minutes, Teagan spoke. She kept her face buried in her hands, too embarrassed and upset to reveal herself. “Are you mad at me?”

Daryl's face contorted. The question threw him for such a surprise, he stopped rubbing her shoulder and pulled away. “Why in the hell would I be mad?” His voice was charged and powerful. He gently grabbed her hands and pulled them away from her face so he could look into her eyes.

Teagan saw a confusion she wasn't used to. “I don't know... every guy seems to get mad.”

“What do you mean?”

Teagan rolled her eyes. She stared off in the distance, remembering every example she had, but only listing a few. “Because I led them on, was a tease, didn't give them what they wanted, broke the deal.. I don't know.” She looked down at her knees.

“Ain't no deal was made ta break, and ya didn't lead me on.” He sighed heavily. He knelt his head down to try and look at Teagan's face. “And the only thing I want is what you want, what yer comfortable with.” He spoke slowly and intentionally. He chose his words carefully, and meant every one. She looked up at him and smiled slightly. “Your speed.” He nodded once to reassure her.

“I've never been able to go through with it. Ever since...” She stopped. She couldn't say in words her reasons, but Daryl knew without asking. He grabbed her hands and held them softly, rubbing circles with his thumbs. “Even if it was with someone I wanted, someone I trusted...” She turned her head to look directly into Daryl's eyes. “Even someone I love.” Daryl recognized the present-tense of her statement and stiffened slightly. And I love you, too... “No matter how slow and nice it was or how bad I wanted it, I couldn't let go.” She paused and sighed. Her voice lowered. “I'm afraid I never will.”

“That don't matter.”

“What?”

“I ain't with you fer that. I don't like you because that's the prize at the end. I like you because...” Daryl was nervous. He had a growing list in his head why he liked Teagan, but saying it out loud felt strange. He'd never really admitted his feelings before, especially these feelings. Daryl coughed softly. “Because yer strong. You can take care of yerself and still volunteer to care 'bout everyone else.” His voice went quiet. “Because you make me a better person.” And yer the first person to care.

Anxious tears were replaced by ones of joy. One slid down Teagan's cheek, and Daryl wiped it away. Daryl bit his lip nervously. “And if it helps any, I didn't really know what I was doin'.”

“What do you mean?”

Daryl shrugged his shoulders. “I dunno just... never really did it before.” He looked away, feeling ashamed. “Had the opportunities just... didn't want to. Merle was always bringing girls home; friends a his or ones from the bar he just came from. I'd wait fer 'em to sleep and just lie ta Merle, keep him off my back. I always tried but it never felt right.” Daryl paused and looked back up at Teagan. “Yer the first person it felt right for.”

“I'm sorry.”

“Don't be sorry.” His voice started to get angry, but he calmed himself quickly. He lowered his voice. “It ain't right unless you want it. And I want you to want it. And if you never do, then so be it. Got plenty of other stuff to make this... us... more than worth it.”

“You mean that?” Teagan looked up at him with round doe-eyes.

Daryl grabbed Teagan's hand and met her face with his. “Every word.”

Teagan smiled and surprised Daryl with a strong hug. She buried her face in his upper chest and breathed deeply. Daryl hugged back just as strong, and Teagan felt his warmth spread over her. “Thank you.” Daryl had never heard a more sincere 'thanks'.

Daryl shook his head. “Don't mention it.”

They squeezed each other for a few more moments before Daryl playfully tipped them over into a laying position. Teagan laughed lightly. She looked in his eyes and moved his moppy hair from his eyes. “Where in the hell did I find a man like you, Daryl Dixon?”

Daryl scoffed. “Hey. I found you.”

“Glad you did.” She laughed, and she bit her lip. “A little bird told me you wanted to just leave me there.”

Damnit, Glenn. A wicked smile hit the corner of Daryl's mouth. “Glad I didn't.” From tears to bliss, Teagan couldn't hide the exhaustion in her face. Daryl lowered his voice to a rasp. “Let's get ta bed.” They unlaced their still-hugging bodies. Daryl sat up, stretched, and groaned loudly. “Got a big day tomorrow.”

“Really? What are we doing?”

“Rick actually asked me ta go hunting.”

“Training any new people?”

Daryl shook his head. “No. Just you.”

“I don't need any training.” She almost sounded offended.

Daryl rolled his eyes. “Not fer training... fer company.”

Teagan nodded. “Well, glad to see you're talking again.”

“He ain't said nothin' ta you?”

Teagan shook her head. “Not a whole lot. Has hardly even looked my way. Not sure if he's mad or ashamed. Both? Neither? I don't know.” Teagan crawled over the bed and sighed. “As long as he isn't trying to kick me out or get me killed. Or anyone else, for that matter.” She paused and breathed deeply. “Can't say I really care what else he's doing.” She spoke through her stretch. Daryl crawled in next to her and wrapped and arm over her. “Is he okay with me going with you?”

Daryl grunted.

“That's not an answer, caveman.”

“Didn't ask. Don't care. Yer coming with me.” His voice was strong and almost demanding. “If ya want.” His voice softened. Teagan simply nodded her head in response. Daryl held her closer and rested his face between her neck and shoulder. Their exhaustion swept over them, and they both fell asleep wrapped around each other.