The Mixtape of Hatred

Jack had a nice day.

He happily made coffee for the angry, non-morning people customers and it somewhat satisfied him to see them happily chug and enjoy the coffee he'd prepared for them.

He was finally at work after long days of mourning in his apartment, and although he's not fully ready to move on, specifically not to his boss who's been sending him longing looks all the way from the cash register, but he was ready to make bad jokes about how much of a hipster Brent was and ironically wear EDM merchandise even though he's more into the pop punk scene if he's being honest. This time if was a grey JackÜ hoodie, yesterday it was a white Alesso hoodie. Frankly, he had enough EDM hoodies to last the entire winter if he were to change hoodies every single day, and a lot of strange tanks that he decided to get for no reason at all.

Cookie was getting bigger and bigger as the day goes by, Jack feels like as if the cat's a magic cat, since it doesn't really meow much and likes cuddles as much as he does.

To sum it up, he was okay, sort of.



Brent was sick, so he and the new guy had to man the shop all by themselves. The new guy could barely handle the coffee machine nor the customers, so Jack did almost everything today. It wore him out, really, it did.

When he was still having his little flashbacks, he could sleep as easy as pie, anywhere and anytime. But now, even with Cookie curled up by his side, he feels like as if something's missing. He contemplated on putting the mixtape back in, or possibly sending himself a mixtape so he could sleep as easily as he used to, but he can't.

The mixtape majorly had Alex Gaskarth songs, maybe he could buy one of his albums so it could lull him to sleep?

He thought about it, he really did, but in a way, he didn't want to. He felt like the music could bring back all the painful memories. The ones that are still freshly repeating itself from time to time.

But Alex's voice was the only thing that could help him with this insomnia. He knew that because he found a playlist on Youtube and listened to it until he fell asleep.

He was rewarded with a peaceful, dreamless, yet unsatisfactory sleep. Even in his state of slumber, he still felt like as if there's something missing. Something that he needed in order to be complete, the missing puzzle piece.

Alexander Gaskarth.



Brent was still sick the following day. He contemplated on visiting him, since he apparently liked Jack and maybe his visit could cheer him up a little. Who knows? Sadly, however, he didn't know where Brent lives and he'd rather not stalk his way into finding his boss's address. Luckily, it was Sunday. They always close up early on Sundays.

The new guy, or Leslie, Jack learnt, was a pretty decent guy. He was Jack's temporary replacement when he was still in his mourning period and when Jack finally came back to work, Brent told him that he'll be called when he's needed. Jack feels like he should be a permanent member of the team, so he doesn't have to work much, but Brent hated the idea of himself not working. It was weird, Brent was weird.

They decided to get dinner together, since Leslie had nothing better to do and so did Jack. They agreed to meet up at the Thai food place near the coffee shop. When Jack got there, he was surprised to see the other boy with plastic baggies of food. He's never eaten in that restaurant before, but Leslie had so he'd promised he'd order Jack something good. They ended up eating in Jack's apartment, since Leslie still lived with his Mom.

They talked about a lot of things, and Jack learnt a lot about Leslie. Like the fact that he's only living with his Mom because he couldn't find a roommate and sure as hell can't live alone. He's also bisexual with a girlfriend, which is kinda cool.

It was great, y'know, finally having a friend that wasn't Brent or Conner. Or Alex and his old high school friends who happened to be touring with Alex.



When Leslie had left, he wondered what to do. He thought about calling Conner, since he once told Jack that he needed a roommate, maybe he could tell him about his new coworker. Conner's a people person, anyway, so he'd probably be open to the idea and meet him and fall in love with him in a very platonic way, much like what he did with Jack.

Jack finally bought an Alex Gaskarth CD. It was his latest album, the one he was promoting on thr tour he'd pretty much ruined. And he was proud of Alex, in a way, he finally got what he wanted. A music career, a happy life, a boyfriend who loved him unconditionally. Jack's life wasn't that bad, he had a job and a handful of friends, but he didn't have what Alex had. He didn't have Alex.

It was frustrating, in a way, but he had to let him go. Alex was never his, anyway, the chance of him ever being his slipped away a long time ago.

Surprisingly, he didn't have to call Conner, since the boy barged in a few minutes after 9PM. It was a bad habit of his, barging into Jack's apartment at ridiculous hours.

"Why didn't you tell me about your new man candy?!"

Jack laughed, "He's my cowerker."

"That's the mysterious Brent?! The one who kissed you and asked you out but you rejected because you were too hung up on that rockstar?"

"No," Jack answered, "He's Leslie, the new guy."

Conner pouted. It was strange how Conner has never met Brent. It was like his work life and personal life were two completely different things, Brent being the one who filled his work life with joy and Conner being the one who does the same thing with his personal life. He should introduce them sometimes, but he feels like as if Brent would get jealous again, much like when Alex happened.

"Quit pouting, dude," Jack poked the other boy's bottom lip, "Still looking for a roommate?"