The Conductor

He’ll be fine. He’ll be fine.

I couldn’t stop myself from pacing back and forth in the bedroom.

He’ll be fine. He’ll be fine.

I moved my hands to my hair, trying my best not to tug at it.

He’ll be fine!

I took in the words of the young woman – I learned that her name was Sarah – and loosened some of my grip on Tyler.
He wanted to go out and purchase needed supplies for the marionettes by himself, so I let him.

However, three hours is more than enough time to finish the task, and I was becoming increasingly worried with every passing minute.

I stopped and sat down in the chair, only removing one hand from my hair.

He still doesn’t know how cruel the world is.
He still doesn’t know the tricks of the trade in society.

He’s vulnerable.

Elizabeth’s murderer is still out there, and Tyler, poor, vulnerable Tyler, could be the next victim.

My hands trembled at the thought.

A cold, lifeless corpse.

Blood soaking the exposed entrails.

His nightmare would have come to life, then.

My eyes wandered to the flask resting on the table.

I haven’t had to drink my thoughts away since Tyler was created, but…

I hesitated at first, but slowly reached my hand towards the flask.
Before I could grab a hold of it, a loud ‘I’m home’ sounded from downstairs.

I rushed down the stairs to meet with the source of the voice, holding two bags of supplies in his arms with a large smile on his face.

It faded away when he got another look at me.

Tyler placed the bags onto the table and walked to stand in front of me.

“Three hours, Tyler…! Why…?! What took you so long…?!”

He bit down on his lip as eye contact drifted away.
I tensed up when I noticed a small pink smudge on the collar of his shirt.

“Where were you, Tyler?”

He didn’t answer.

“Please. Answer me…!”
“…I was with Sarah.”

“Did she see anything?!”
“…What?”

“Did she see any part of you, Tyler?!”
He shook his head.

I slowly inhaled and then exhaled to calm myself down.

“You barely know Sarah, Tyler. Why would you let her kiss you?”
“Are you angry with me?”

“Tyler…!”
“Are you?”

“That’s not the point—”

Before anything else was said, I was pushed back against the wall, and a pair of lips was on mine.

His eyes were closed as his hands rested on my chest – I was in shock, paralyzed between him and the wall.
His tongue pushed past my lips and into my mouth; that was when I pushed him away.

I wiped my mouth and glared at him.

“What in God’s name, Tyler?!”
“S-Sarah…said that if two people are really fond of each other, then they kiss…and…”

"You are not fond of me, Tyler! You can't be!"
"But...!"

I grit my teeth together and balled my hand into a fist.

“Go upstairs. Now.”
“Michael—”

“I said now!”

He pushed past me and dashed up the stairs, slamming the door shut behind him.
I leant against the table and massaged my temples.

Tyler has befriended a harlot.
She’s corrupting him.

She’s making him think that he’s in love with—

I didn’t finish that thought as I heard soft crying from upstairs.
I bit down on my lip – the taste of the kiss bothered me to no end – and began to put some of the supplies away.

I can't comfort him this time. He needs to learn that he’s in the wrong.

| x | x | x |

He was asleep on the bed with tear-stained cheeks – his clothes were still on, so he must have cried himself to sleep.

I did feel guilty for ignoring him the rest of the day, but he needed to learn.

Men can't desire other men; it is wrong in our society.

I removed his clothing from him, leaving him in his underwear, and pulled the bed sheets over him.
I walked over to my desk and sat in the chair, opening my journal and dipping my pen in ink.

Before I could start to write, small whimpers were heard.

Tyler was having his nightmare again.

I have to ignore him. I have to ignore him.

Soon, however, he cried out and started to toss and turn in the bed.

And then he cried out my name.

I placed the pen down, closed the journal, and walked over to the bed.
I got under the covers and pulled him to my chest, calming him down in an instant.

I sighed and kissed his forehead.

"You can't love me, Tyler. It's not what our relationship was meant to be."