Lonely, Drunk and Beautiful

“Hello Jack.”
“Bassam.” I say monotonically, unsurprised to hear his voice.
I slam the door, flicking on the lounge light to reveal my father, stood awkwardly in the middle of my living room.
“Please, sit down.” I say, half-sarcastically, and he shifts.
“I’m fine standing.”
I shrug, taking my jacket off with some difficulty due to the splint, sensing my father’s eyes lingering across it but ignoring this fact.
“So how have you been?” he says blandly, and I scowl.
“What do you want, Bassam?” I snap.
“Believe it or not, Jack, I do actually care for your welfare. So when I checked your card purchases to ensure your spending wasn’t becoming too impulsive, imagine my surprise to find that for the past month, the only charges to the card were for cigarettes and booze.” He eyes my body, shaking his head slightly. “At first I thought it must be a mistake, but now it’s evident that isn’t the truth.”
I press my lips together, folding one arm across my chest.
“What are you implying?” I say coldly, and he shakes his head, stepping towards me.
“Jack, if you’re relapsing into previous behaviours, then I’ll have no choice but to…” he starts.
“What, get me committed to the psych ward again? I’ve got news for you Bassam, I’m eighteen now. You can’t force me to do anything.” I cut him off.
He sighs.
“I was hoping it wouldn’t come to this, Jack, but if you continue with this pattern, and refuse help, I’ll have no choice but to cut you off completely.”
My mouth falls open. His grip tightens on his briefcase, a frown marring his features.
“I know your mother leaving was hard on you, Jack, and that is why I’ve allowed a lot of leeway with you. But if you choose to go down this path again, I’ll have no choice. I will not enable your self-destruction, Jack.”
Bassam shakes his head, walking past me and opening the door.
“You have two weeks to prove to me that you’re not relapsing. I’ll be checking your credit card routinely, and I’ll be back again this time next week. If I don’t see any changes…your credit card will be cut off immediately, and you will lose access to your bank accounts.”
With that, he opens the door, gives me one last irate glance, and walks out of the house.

___________________________________

Since punching a wall is out of the question, I end up running an ice cold bath instead, bringing in a packet of cigarettes and a bottle of whiskey.
I slip into the water, the shock making my limbs scream out, but I carry on moving down, bending my legs so my chest is submerged.
I have my right arm sticking out of the water so the splint doesn’t get wet, chin resting on my collarbones, and I glare at the scummy side of the tub, the water so cold that I can feel my tendons aching.
I grab the bottle, unscrewing the cap with my teeth, and take a long swig, suppressing the urge to wince as it burns down my throat, magnified because of the freezing cold water.
I can hear my phone ringing in my bedroom but ignore it, focused on the cold that seems to be leaking up my spine and slowing down my thoughts.
I sink further down into the tub, groaning as the seemingly constant vibrations from my bedroom cut through the ache in my head, and close my eyes.

_____________________________________

Oddly enough, someone knocking on the bathroom door wakes me up.
I don’t respond. If it’s a serial killer, they can kill me, I’m too cold and tired to put up a fight right now anyway.
As it turns out, it’s someone much worse.
I groan as Ariel’s overly enthusiastic voice slices through the morbid silence in the bathroom, and hear her laugh.
Standing up proves impossible, as my legs are completely numb, and my knees end up giving out, causing me to fall, my ribs hitting the rim of the tub.
“Fuck.” I mutter, somewhat pathetically, knowing that’s going to bruise like a bitch.
“Jack? You dead?” Ariel calls.
“Unfortunately, no.” I yell back, and she laughs.
“Need some help?” she teases.
I tell her to fuck off, clumsily clambering out of the water and releasing the plug.
The gurgle of water soothes my throbbing head enough for me to be able to put on underwear, and I stagger out of the door, walking with some difficulty past Ariel.
“Look who I’ve been texting.” she teases, and I glance at her phone with mild disinterest, groaning when I see Alex’s name.
“Isn’t that great. If you’ve told him I’m secretly an adorable little kitten with a fluffy heart, I swear to god Ariel…” I mutter, grabbing a pair of jeans from the floor and an old towel.
She bursts out laughing.
“No, I haven’t actually Jack, because I don’t make it a habit to lie to my new friends, and you’re literally the opposite of that, hun.” she mocks, and I roll my eyes.
“Why are you here?” I sigh, ignoring the tinge of deja vu the sentence gives me.
“Oh right, that. I’m having a party tonight, you’re coming.” she says excitedly.
“Is this another party where it’s just me and you and we get drunk and complain about our lives for six straight hours before passing out because as fun as that sounds…”
She hits my shoulder, and I smirk, drying my legs and pulling on the jeans.
“Shut the fuck up, Jacky. It’s actually a birthday party for our dear Alexander.” she grins, and I sigh loudly.
“Are you serious, Ariel?” I mutter, but get interrupted by another hesitant knock on the front door.
The gleam in her eyes is enough explanation.
“He thinks this is your house, doesn’t he?” I sigh, and she starts laughing.
“We just have to keep him here until everything’s set up. I’ve had people working on this party since school let out.” she says mischievously, turning and skipping downstairs.
I hear her open the door, chattering excitedly to Alex, and bury my head in my hand, half-convinced I’m still passed out in the tub and this is all some ridiculous dream.
I shake my head, leaning over and pulling out a plain red shirt to wear.
“Um, Ariel? Who’s jacket is this?” Alex asks uneasily as I’m on my way downstairs.
“That would be mine.” I say, smirking despite myself as Alex’s eyes widen when I cross the threshold. “This house also happens to be mine, in case Ariel neglected to mention that.”
I shoot her a look, and she bites her lip, trying not to laugh at Alex’s stricken expression.
“Happy birthday, kitten.” I murmur, lips against his ear after I pull him into a one-armed hug.
He shivers, though whether it’s from my breath on his ear or the coldness of my arm on his neck, I don’t know.
I release him, grinning when I see his red-stained cheeks. Ariel clears her throat awkwardly, murmuring something about the kitchen, and slips out. I don’t quite catch what she says, because I’ve met Alex’s soft gaze again, and I’m too enthralled by the way his eyelashes are fluttering.
“T-thank you.” he murmurs, and my lips pull up into a lopsided smile.
“You’re welcome.” I say, equally as gently.
Ariel knocking something over in the kitchen breaks the mood, and Alex blushes again as we jerk away from each other.
I nod my head towards the door, indicating Alex should follow, and walk through the door.