I'm Just a Puppet and She's Holding the Strings

Soon after Mia's 'accidental' slip of the tongue, Sebastien announced that he had to leave to make sure Beth wasn't getting even more annoyed.

"Remember what I said Sebastien, trust yourself, I don't ever want to see you coming to me for relationship problems again, okay?" I reminded.

He saluted me as he got up from his seat and straightened himself out.

"Yes Ma'am," He agreed.

"Good," I smiled.

"It was nice to meet you Sebastien," Mia greeted.

"You too Mia," Sebastien grinned.

"See you around," I waved.

He shot me a wide, beaming smile, "If I'm lucky enough,"

I couldn't stop a smile from stretching across my face.

But part of me just had a serious case of Deja Vu.

As Sebastien reached the door he suddenly turned around.

"Oh, and thanks for the champagne last night Rachel, it helped a lot," He thanked me and I nodded.

"You're welcome,"

He waved at me and I replicated the gesture before he left.

_Sebastien's P.O.V_

'If I'm lucky enough'?

What the HELL was I thinking?!

That's the second time I've flirted with her in like two hours.

I'm getting married in a few months for crying out loud, I need to stop flirting with random women!

Well... This was the first time I'd flirted with anyone since Beth and I became serious.

Either way I need to stop it.

No matter how hot Rachel was...

I mean... Ugh, damn it!

_Rachel's P.O.V_

"So how was the interview?" Mia asked, turning her upper body slightly to face me.

I looked at her and shrugged, "Okay I guess,"

"Okay? Is that it? Come on, there's got to be at least a 'good' there! Did something bad happen?"

"No,"

"Did you have lipstick on your teeth?"

"No,"

"Did he hit on you?"

"No!" I said disgustedly, "Mr. Kingston was very professional and friendly,"

"So what happened?"

"Nothing happened," I shrugged, taking a large gulp from my bottle, "It went really well,"

"I don't understand, if it went really well and nothing bad happened then what's the problem?" She asked in confusion.

"The job is the problem. It's not just a bar, it's an... Um... It's different,"

"How do you mean 'different'? Do you mean like a strip club?"

"No, not as bad as that,"

"One of those bars where the waitresses have to get up and sing on the bar?"

"Worse than that,"

"A pole dancing club?"

"Almost as bad as that,"

"So what exactly do you have to do?"

"Um... Dance on tables, act like a whore, you know, the usual," I spoke unenthusiastically.

"Did you take it?"

"He said he's gonna let me know if I have the job later on but I don't know whether I want to do it," I admitted, "But I'm struggling as it is. I need the job but I don't want it. And without much other experience apart from working as a barmaid, my options aren't exactly that wide,"

"Rach, I know you're upset love but tone down the emphasis,"

I rolled my eyes.

"So what're you going to do?"

"I have no idea, what do you think?"

"Well... If you're tight with money and you need a job then you should take it if it's offered. Then you should keep looking for a new job so you're still got an income while you're finding a job that you actually want,"

"I think I'm gonna have to do that," I sighed, "It'll feel so degrading though, I'll be so uncomfortable,"

"You're bound to but just keep telling yourself that you have to do it and that you're doing it so you can get a job that you really want," She explained, "You won't lose respect or anything for wanting to keep a roof over your head,"

"I guess, but I just... I don't know. What happens if someone I know walks in and I have to dance on their table?"

"What guys do you know that would go into a place like that? Any friends that you have are way not sleazy enough to go there,"

I nodded in agreement, "True,"

"So don't worry. I won't tell anyone, you won't tell anyone, you haven't told anyone else so it'll all be on the down low. Don't stress about it love, it'll be fine," She reassured.

"You promise?"

She chuckled and hugged me slightly, "I promise,"

"Thanks,"

We stayed in silence for a second while I drank some more and I noticed Ray come out from the back before beginning to do stock check.

"Mia is there a reason that you're not behind the bar?" Ray called authoritatively but with the ultimate calmness.

Mia turned to face him, "Do you see any customers?" Her eyebrow quirked as she quipped smugly.

Ray shook his head and continued his work.

"Did you hear Sebastien flirting with you before?" Mia grinned, trying to hide her excitement.

"No I didn't,"

"Oh come off it, you so did!"

"What're you talking about?"

"'If I'm lucky enough'," Mia regurgitated Sebastien's words, "That was completely flirtatious!"

I shook my head, "For God's sake Mia, he's getting married soon, I doubt he's gonna go 'round flirting with random girls he's just met,"

"That's bull! People flirt with people all the time whether married, single, engaged or dating someone, they just never do anything about it,"

"You have a very warped outlook on relationships, you know that?"

"I don't, I have a realistic one. You can't deny that he flirted with you, no man would say that with that kind of smile on his face if he wasn't totally attracted to you,"

"Or maybe, just maybe, you're misreading the signs?" I suggested.

She shot me a vicious glare.

"Or not... You know..." I winced and then smiled angelically at her.

"He really was flirting though, I swear,"

"It wouldn't matter if he was anyway," I shrugged.

"Why not?"

"For flip's sake!" I prevented myself from swearing at her, "How many bloody times do I have to tell you that he's getting married?!"

"A million because you can still flirt back!"

"But I'm not going to because he's getting married; I'd rather not get attached to him. Being friends or acquaintances is good enough for me,"

"Ugh, why are you always happy with second best?!"

"Because that's all I'm ever gonna get so I might as well embrace it,"

"Or you could fight for the best! You deserve the best Rachel! You've worked harder than anyone I've ever known and I hate to see you finish last all the time,"

"Well get used to it Mia, really, 'cause it's the only place you're ever gonna see me finish," I sighed, "If I even finish at all,"

"My God, you have the worst self-esteem levels in the world,"

"Thanks, I do try," I mumbled glumly.

"Rachel Morgan, the only thing you are missing is confidence. If you had that then you'd be able to have whatever the hell you want from life," She said, "You're intelligent, funny, sweet, friendly, a fantastic advice-giver, you're great with people and you're drop dead gorgeous! I'd pay to be half of what you are! But what I lack with everything else, I make up for with confidence. Maybe this new job will help you come out of your shell a bit more. A confidence boost is all you need, I swear,"

"That's sweet Mia, really thank you but with everything I have to offer, what do I have to show for it?" I questioned, "I'll tell you what I have- nothing that's what I have,"

"You have plenty,"

"Oh, I'm sorry, I'm twenty-five years old, I'm stuck in a job with no potential, I'm about to start a job that makes me as good as a God-damn whore, I'm broke and I haven't had a boyfriend since I was seventeen and that wasn't even a proper relationship, that's what I have to show for my years of hard work Mia,"

She looked at me and shook her head.

"Rachel, you have so much more than that. You are an intelligent, gorgeous twenty five year old, you're 'stuck' in a job that you enjoy, you're about to start a job to act like a whore to keep you in a house that you love until you find something you want to do that pays enough, you're gonna get more money and you don't need a boyfriend to be happy. You have a loving family and lots of friends that are here for you no matter what, you should be happy about that, some people dont,"

I looked up at her and smiled before opening my mouth to speak but Ray interrupted.

"That's strange..." He began.

Mia and I both looked at him.

"What?" We chorused.

"Well, I've just done stock check and the amount of bottles and stuff gone doesn't add up to the amount that's been paid in. By my count we're missing the price of a bottle of Champagne... Either that or twenty bottles of beer," He frowned, looking up at us.

I looked down and winced slightly having forgotten about the champagne. Ray didn't notice my expression but I watched as Mia's features showed realisation and she noticed my face as she turned to me.

"Sebastien mentioned something about champagne before... Did you..?" She trailed off as I nodded.

"That's gonna come out of your pay you idiot," She growled quietly.

"Have you girls given anyone anything free this week?" Ray asked with a small smile.

I looked over at Mia and then at Ray before inhaling and opening my mouth.

"I took a bottle of champagne the other night Ray, sorry, I forgot to tell you. Zach and I were having a romantic night in," Mia cut in.

Ray looked at her for a moment and she smiled at him.

"It's coming out of your paycheque, Mia," Ray's eyebrows raised at her.

"I know, sorry," She grinned before Ray went back to work.

She turned back around and shook her head at me, "I don't believe you sometimes,"

"You didn't have to do that I would've taken the blame,"

"Well I told you that I'm here for you, you're struggling, when I struggle Zach helps me, when you struggle, I help you,"

"I owe you one,"

"As long as I see you flirt back with Sebastien once in a while I'll be happy," She smiled.

"If it makes you feel any better, I giggled and teased him when he was walking me home," I admitted.

She grinned at me, "That's more like it,"

I knew from then on that no matter what happened in my life, Mia was gonna be there for me through it all giving me what I needed whether it was support or a kick up the arse.

And I'd never felt more secure.

"I think I'm gonna head home," I announced, "Call me when you want a lift home,"

"Oh don't worry about it, I'm staying over at Zach's tonight," Mia smiled back.

"Aye, aye," I winked suggestively.

She laughed, "It's nothing like that. He said that he thinks you need a break from picking me up so he's coming to get me and I'm just gonna spend the night at his place,"

"I love that man sometimes," I chuckled, "Alright then, tell him thanks and I'll see you soon," I shimmied out of the booth.

"Call me if Mr. Kingston calls, alright?"

"I will," I agreed.

We hugged goodbye and I left her to finish her shift.

It took me about ten minutes to get home where I went inside and kicked off my shoes. I trudged up the stairs and got changed into my pyjamas before heading back downstairs again.

I got myself a glass of water and then flopped onto the couch in the front room.

As I began watching a random programme on TV, the phone rang.

I jumped slightly and leaned over the arm of the couch to grab the phone.

"Hello?" I answered in a tired voice.

"Rachel! It's Shaun Kingston here,"

I almost spat out the water in my mouth.

"Oh!" I coughed slightly, "Hey Mr. Kingston,"

"Please, call me Shaun. Anyway, I'm just calling to give you the good news!"

What? I don't have to act like a whore and I can just take over your job and turn the place into something respectable?

"Good news?" I sighed, wishing I could tell him to stuff his job, but deciding against it.

"I'm offering you the job, you're perfect for the position,"

I stifled a dry laugh, "Really?"

"Yeah, if you're willing to take it, I'd like you to start on Monday,"

"Um, yeah sure, that sounds great," I lied.

I wasn't exactly excited about dancing for sleazy men in four days time.

"Fantastic, your shift starts at seven pm, I'll be looking forward to it,"

"Me too," I replied unenthusiastically before hanging up the phone.

Ugh, four days and I'll be where I never even imagined in my wildest nightmares I ever would be.

I let my head fall onto the back of the couch and then put my hands over my face, allowing an exasperated sigh to escape.

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door.

I jumped slightly and growled, "Ugh, leave me alone," I cried.

I took a deep breath and hauled myself up from the couch.

I grasped the door weakly and pulled it open coming face to face with the last person I expected to see.

"Sebastien?" I frowned in confusion.

"Hey," He smiled awkwardly.

"What are you doing here?" I questioned, "Actually, I'm gonna change that, how do you know where I live?"

"Well, I left my wallet at the bar and when I went back to get it, you'd left and I got talking to Mia..."

"Oh God..." I worried, "What did she say?"

His eyebrow quirked curiously, "What do you think she said?"

"That depends whether what she actually said was as embarrassing as what I'm thinking or I'm just picturing the worst case scenario,"

"Which would be?"

"Don't play games Sebastien, I'm too tired for that," I sighed.

"Sorry," He smiled apologetically.

"Do you wanna come in?" I offered.

"Do you mind? It's freezing out here," He rubbed his hands over his arms to emphasise his point.

"No, go ahead," I shrugged, stepping aside as he came inside.

"Sorry I'm only in my pyjamas; I would've stayed dressed if I'd have known you were coming,"

"Don't worry about it, it's your house, you should be comfortable," He replied.

"Um, do you want something to drink? Tea, coffee, water or something?" I suggested.

"No thanks, I don't want to just come and steal all your teabags or anything,"

"You can steal my teabags anytime," I grinned but it soon fell, "Oh my Gosh that was really suggestive, I didn't mean it like that, I meant you're always welcome," I corrected.

He laughed slightly, "It's okay, I know what you meant,"

"Are you sure you don't want anything? I'm making myself one if that helps your decision,"

He smiled, "Thanks, that'd be great,"

"Come on then," I nodded in the direction of the kitchen and made my way there with Sebastien close behind me.

I made him his drink and handed it to him.

"Thanks," He mumbled, taking a sip.

"It's hot," I stated.

I heard him yelp and curse quietly as I walked away to get my own drink. I sniggered and turned around.

"I burnt my tongue," His speech was slightly impaired due to his now sizzling tongue.

"I told you it was hot," I said smugly.

"Would've helped more if you'd said it before I'd drank some," His eyebrows raised.

"Sorry," I grinned, "So, to what do I owe the pleasure of your company?" I asked as I leaned back on the counter.

"Well, as I said before, I was talking to Mia when I went back to get my wallet, and she was telling me stuff,"

My eyebrow quirked, "What kind of stuff?" I questioned anxiously, casually sipping at my tea so I didn't seem like I was too nervous.

He just stopped and stared at me for a second before stepping forward, holding out a fist.

"What is it?" I frowned.

"Just hold out your hand,"

I eyed him suspiciously but held out an open palm below his clenched fist.

He opened his hand and rest it on mine for a second to make sure what he was giving me didn't fall.

I felt a small spark of electricity shoot through me before he pulled away.

He smiled slightly and I looked down at my hand.

I frowned when I saw money on my palm.

"What's this for?"

"It should cover the bill for the champagne,"

"Sebastien I gave you that as a gift, I didn't and I still don't want the money,"

"Maybe not but I want to give you it because you failed to inform me of the actual price of the bottle and that it took almost half of your paycheque,"

"And Mia told you all this did she?"

I was slightly irritated.

"She did," He nodded.

I sighed and put the money on the counter, "I'm not gonna take this from you,"

"Why not?"

"Because I gave you a gift and gifts are non-refundable,"

He shook his head, "I'm not saying that are but there was no occasion for a gift so I'm paying you. I would've got some anyway and paid for it so you should take it,"

"Save your money,"

"No you save yours, you need it more than I do,"

I looked over to him with a frown.

"I'm not a charity Sebastien, I'm managing perfectly well, I don't need your money,"

"But I want you to have it,"

"But I don't want it!"

"But you need it!"

"No I don't! Who are you to tell me what I do and don't need?!" I shouted, completely enraged.

He stared at me, his expression blank yet slightly surprised at my outburst.

I sighed exasperatedly and rubbed my hands over my face.

"I'm sorry, I just..." My eyes fell to the floor, "Sorry,"

"Rachel, I know what it's like to want to be independent and I know it's hard but everyone needs help sometimes," He spoke wisely.

My gaze trailed up to his eyes.

"And I appreciate the gesture Sebastien, but I promise you, I really don't need the money,"

"Are you always this stubborn?" He sighed irritably.

I smiled slightly at him, "One of my more annoying features,"

"I figured," He replied, his lips twitching into a small grin.

I chuckled slightly and picked up the notes from the counter, holding them out to him.

"Here,"

He gazed at me for a second before he shook his head in defeat and took it from me.

"Can I use your bathroom before I get going?" He asked.

I nodded, "Yeah of course, it's just up the stairs, to the right and it's the first door," I directed.

"Thanks," He smiled and left the room.

I bunked myself onto the counter and crossed my legs under me.

I rested my elbows on my knees and buried my face in my hands.

A large sigh escaped my lips and I couldn't help but think about what just happened between Sebastien and I.

In all honesty, I would've completely freaked out at anyone else and not even thought about apologising.

I've barely known the guy for a day and he completely changes my natural ways...

That can't be good.

"Hey, um, thanks for the tea and... For letting me use your bathroom," Sebastien spoke as he walked back into the room, his eyebrow raised at his own statement.

I straightened my legs and got off the counter, "You're welcome,"

"So, I'm gonna head out," He stuck his thumb in the direction of the door.

I nodded and led him out into the hall.

"Thanks for everything Rachel,"

"Anytime," I smiled as I opened the door.

I leaned my side against the edge of the door, resting my head against it.

"I really do mean it you know, you saved my soon to be marriage, if it wasn't for you I'd probably be living in Pierre's house right now,"

I chuckled slightly, "You're very welcome, I'm here to help,"

"If there's anything I can ever do for you, really, just name it," He offered.

Just keep in touch... I thought.

I ran a hand through my hair, "I'll think on it and let you know,"

He rubbed my arm kindly and grinned, "I'll come visit you in the bar every once in a while to see if you've thought of something,"

"That'd be nice," I nodded, "I'll see you soon,"

"You will do," He replied before waving slightly and walking out of the door.

I waited until he'd driven away before I closed the door.

I walked into the front room and fell onto the couch.

And I couldn't get this ridiculously inane grin from my face.

_Two Hours Later_

I stretched on the couch and turned off my TV before locking up and heading up to bed.

I headed for my room and raised an eyebrow when I saw the bedroom door was open.

I swear I closed it...

I frowned and carefully stepped towards the room, adrenaline pumping and heart racing, absolutely petrified someone was here.

I couldn't see anyone as I peeked through the door so I flicked on the light and found nothing.

But I did catch a glimpse of something on the bed.

I closed the door firmly behind me and walked over to the bed. I picked up the note and saw the money Sebastien tried to give me before beneath it.

I rolled my eyes and scanned the pink ink on what I'd now found out was toilet paper.

Consider this a gift. Help me lift my conscience?
If you don't want to keep it then give it to charity, at least I know I'm not in debt =).
Sebastien.

P.S- I couldn't find any paper and this is your pen, not mine. I don't carry pink pens around with me. x

I couldn't help but smile.

I got ready for bed and placed the money on the bedside table as I got into bed.

I took hold of the note and stared at it for a few minutes.

I couldn't help but concentrate on that one 'x' at the end of the letter.

Such a small thing, but it made such a big difference to me for some reason.

I ran my thumb over the tissue and placed it with the money before snuggling down into bed.

Christ Sebastien... What am I gonna do with you?
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I'm fighting, oh, a feeling
That is twisting on the inside
I've tried running, tried resisting
But it's got a hold on me this time
If I don't stand a chance then
Let me down easy
I don't wanna fall from this high
Oh these days are the days I was always afraid would arrive

Richard Fleeshman- These Days
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