Glass Hearts

I quickly pulled my arm away and shoved my sleeve back down. "I fucked up. It won't happen again."

"What do you mean you fucked up?" Austin pulled my chin up to look at him. His brown puppy dog eyes looked so sad it made my heart physically hurt.

"There's a lot about my past that I haven't told you," I admitted. "I prefer to keep most things in the past or just forget about them all together."

"I don't care what things you have in the past, the past is the past, and that doesn't matter to me, but if its something that is eating away at you. That is making you do this shit," he pulled my arm up, "then you need to talk to someone about it."

"I'm pretty fucked in the head Austin. The things that I think aren't normal. The dreams that I have aren't normal. I was fine for the past two years. I had gone through extensive therapy and just about every antidepressant known to man. I guess going back and seeing my dad, having all those memories flood back and in big swoop, it fucked me up all over again. I had a complete break down a few days after you left, that's when I did this... I just... sometimes I just have so much emotion bottled up inside that I can't cry, I can't scream, I can't sleep, I just feel completely numb to the world... and I just have to feel..."

"So you do this..." Austin whispered, now running his fingers over the old scars on my arm that he must have never noticed, or chose not to mention. I saw nothing but saddness and fear crossing over his eyes, and I watched as a tear slipped out.

"Austin please don't," I whispered wiping the tear from his cheek. "It won't happen again. I promise."

"I know that promises don't mean much when it comes to selfharm," he said sadly and kissed my forehead. I nodded knowingly and starred down at Austin's tattooed fingers still running over my scars. "Let me try this again then... I can't promise that it won't happen again because I never know when I'm going to completely lose it and slip up, but I do promise that I will try my hardest to not do it, and I promise that I will start talking to you more about the things that bother me, rather than keeping them hidden inside."

His hand ran up my arm to my cheek, cupping my face in his large hand. "That's all I ask for." He kissed me softly before pulling me against him. I breathed in the sent of him, instantly calming down. I couldn't ask for a better boyfriend.

--------

I watched Austin as he watched Star Wars on the large flat screen. He mouthed along to every other word, causing me to laugh. He still didn't take his eyes away from the screen. I trailed my fingers over his chest and stomach, tracing over his tattoos. This was supposed to be my time, not Star Wars time.

I slid my hand down the front of his basketball shorts, finally getting his attention. "What are you doing?" He asked with a smirk, not taking his eyes away from the TV.

"Oh nothing," I whispered innocently placing kisses down his chest, leaving my hand resting just inside his shorts. I felt him draw in a deep breath and looked up to see his eyes still attached to the screen.

I rolled my eyes and slid down, trailing small kisses from hip to hip. His breathing began to shorten and he finally looked down at me. "Babe I'm trying to watch this," he groaned tucking hair behind my ear.

"And I'm trying to please my boyfriend." I smirked up at him and pulled his shorts and boxers down, reviling his hard member. "And obviously someone wants it."

I watched as Austin licked his lip before biting it. I took him in my hand and licked up his shaft causing a small moan to escape his lips. I smirked and moved my lips so I could suck over his tip, feeling him harden more around my lips. His hands flew to my hair as I began bobbing up and down, humming over his member. A moan escaped his lips as he lightly tugged on my hair, I pulled away and smirked. "Do I have your attention now?"

He groaned and shot me a glare. "If you stop now I will never forgive you."

I giggled and bit my lip, seductively crawling up, trailing kisses up his stomach to his lips. He pulled my shirt off and unclasped my bra in one swift motion. I shook my bra off and threw it to the floor, returning to his lips again.

He worked at my pants as I sucked and bit on his neck, making sure to mark my territory. I kicked my pants and panties to the floor before straddling Austin's hips. He pulled me down, pressing my body into his as he crashed his lips against mine. "I need you so bad right now," he whispered hoarsely against my lips.

I smirked and sat up, slowly lowering myself onto him, clutching onto his chest as I let out a small moan. His hands found their way to my hips guiding me as I slowly road up and down his shaft, letting him deep inside of me. I let out load breathless moans as I quickened my pace scratching over Austin's chest.

He swiftly sat up and held me tight against him, sucking over my chest as I continued bobbing up and down on him. I scratched down his back and moaned his name loudly as I felt myself climax. I road out my orgasm and quickened my pace as I felt him reaching his.

I breathed heavily resting my forehead against Austin's shoulder, leaving him still inside me. I let out a few deep breaths, struggling to make my breathing normal again.

Austin chuckled and kissed along my shoulder. "Damn..."

I giggled and pushed him back down, disconnecting us. I pressed my lips hard against his, finally getting my breathing back to normal. "Uhm, we made an oopsy," Austin said through our kiss.

I shrugged and kissed him on the cheek before starting to get up. "It's fine. I'm on the pill. I'm going to shower now, I'm kinda sweaty."

He groaned and pulled me back down. "Not just yet. That was way too hot for you to leave now."

I giggled and bit my lip. "You could always join me..."

"That I wouldn't mind," he said with a smirk before swiftly getting off the bed and pulling me into his arms as he made the way to the bathroom. He sat me down on the counter and got the water adjusted before picking me back up and carrying me into the shower. "I can walk you know," I chuckled wrapping my legs around his.

"There's no need for walking right now," he mumbled in my ear before unexpectedly slamming himself into me, causing me to let out a loud gasp.

------

"We need to do that more often," I let out, laying on our hotel bed in just a towel.

"If you take control of me like you did the first time, I won't be able to control myself. That was fucking hot."

I blushed and covered my face. "I wanted you and you weren't paying attention to me!"

"Well you did a good job at getting my full attention," he said leaning down to peck my lips. "Now get dressed we're meeting the guys for dinner."

I groaned and stood up stretching out my sore legs. "I don't think I can walk right now... This is rough"

Austin let out a loud laugh and shook his head, pulling on a fresh pair of boxer briefs. I shoved his shoulder and made my way over to my bag. I slipped on a fresh pair of panties and a strapless black bra and pulled a tight fitting black dress over my hips. "Can you help me zip this up?" I asked struggling to pull the zipper up.

Austin slipped on his shirt and came over, struggling to zip the dress as well. "Autumn, I don't think this dress wants to be worn."

I ground and pouted. "My fucking boobs are too big for my favorite dress. What is life? I will make this work"

Austin watched as I turned the dress around so the zipper was in the front, and I finally pulled the zipper to the top and sighed in relief. I spun the dress back around and pulled it up over my boobs. "Success," I whispered turning to Austin with a huge grin on my face.

"My god," he said with his jaw hanging open. He came over to me and ran his hands along the curves of my body before pulling me up to crash his lips into mine. I pulled away and found a pair of black wedges I had in my bag, and slipped them on.

"We are seriously going to have to go for a round three when we get back," Austin whispered seductively in my ear as we walked out of the hotel room. We road the elevator down to the hotel lobby and met up with the rest of the guys.

"Dayum girl," Tino commented letting out a whistle. I giggled as Austin put his arm protectively around my waist. "Where are we off too?"

"This dank ass Italian place down the street," Alan answered turning to walk.

We all followed Alan as he lead the way a few blocks down to a fancy looking Italian place. "I have reservations for Alan Ashby."

The hostess nodded and took a few menus before leading us back to a table. "Your waiter will be right with you. The drink menu is inside of the menu if you want to look that over beforehand."

We nodded and all turned to open out menus. We silently scanned over our menus. My stomach was growling loudly from the delicious smells coming from around me. "Hungry," Austin asked arching his eyebrow.

"Very," I groaned rubbing my stomach.

"I can't imagine why," he smirked giving me a wink.

"Calm it love birds," Alan grimaced. "We heard enough coming from your room this afternoon"

I blushed and covered my face with my hands in embarrassment. "Oh my fucking god."

Our waiter walked up and introduced himself and took our drink orders. Of course I ordered a large glass of red wine while all the boys got a beer.

I listened as everyone talked about about all the fun they were having on tour and their failed pranks on one another. I was three glasses of wine down by the our food arrived. The giggles had hit me in full swing as I tried my hardest to eat my calzone.

"You got that," Phil asked with a laugh. I was trying to cut my calzone with a fork and knife and it wasn't going all that well.

"Fuck it," I announced tearing it apart with my fingers and shoving a huge piece into my mouth. I let out a moan as the cheesy goodness flooded into my mouth.

Austin eyed me with a smirk, trying to contain his laugher. "You are something special, my love."

-------

We finished eating and paid before heading out. We all decided to go to a club. I stepped in and Austin lead me over to the bar and ordered a few shots of tequila. "Tequila?"

He smirked at me and handed me my shot. I graciously took it and grimaced after the gross liquid slid down my throat. He took my hand and lead me over to the dance floor. Some techno song flooded from the loud speakers, and Austin pulled me against him by my hips. I swing my hands loosely over his shoulders and grinned my hips against him to the beat. I felt the liquid courage fill me as I turned around and pressed myself back against him, grinding myself into his crotch. I felt his hands snake around me, pulling me closer against him as he grind back into me.

We continued to dance until we were both out of breath. We made our way through the sea of people over to where the other guys were sitting. Alan had some brunette on his lap attached to his lips, she was grinding into him, and it was looking like Alan was going to be getting lucky tonight. I rolled my eyes and took a seat next to Phil. "I'm going to go get us some drink," Austin said loudly in my ear before heading over to the bar.

After ten minutes of waiting for Austin, and no return, I decided to go look for him. As I walked up to the bar I spotted him talking to some bimbo looking brunette. His body language looked like he was flirting, as he leaned down to say something in her ear. I felt jealousy flood over my brain and I made long strides over to him, pushing a few people out of my way.

I found his hand and laced my fingers protectively with his, causing him to turn and look at me, his eyes suddenly grew. "Hey baby," he smiled kissing my cheek. "I was just about to come back with out drinks until I ran into Chrissy."

I raised an eyebrow as I instantly remembered his ex girlfriend he had told me about. "Chrissy this is my girlfriend, Autumn."

"Hi Autumn," she scoffed looking me up and down. "Well I've gotta go. By Austin." She leaned up and kissed his cheek, lingering her hand on his chest before walking away.

"What the fuck?" I exclaimed glaring at her as she disappeared into the crowed. I turned back to Austin and glared at him. "What the hell was that all about?"

"Nothing Autumn," he answered brushing a few strands of hair out of my face.

"I saw you flirting with her."

"I wasn't! I swear! She was flirting with me, but I swear I was just telling her about you."

"Whatever," I let out with a puff. "I'm over this place. Can we leave?"