Kissing Cousins

It had been a few days since the wedding and I noticed that he was on my mind more than ever. That scared me, because I knew I had to stop myself from liking him and further pursuing this. But, my feelings were not that easy to hide.

It was either Saturday or Sunday, but I can't remember which. Like most mornings, I woke up kind of late. I had no idea that we were having guests over again, so I had to get ready while they were at our house. What bothered me was not the fact that I had to get ready in the presence of our guests, but that anyone besides the people who lived in this house had to see me like this: morning breath, crazy hair, and all. But I had no choice and it could be worse.

Little did I know, it'd be another day spent playing video games. I cannot say I was surprised, because what else were we supposed to do? It's not like this house had that much to offer. The game of choice appeared to be Super Smash Brothers Brawl. Of course, not everyone had experience in playing this game. I hadn't played in a while, so after having played this game enough times, I figured out the controls and the moves of my favorite characters. Saying that this game is competitive would be an understatement for this family. We would play game after game in Brawl mode (which is basically a free-for-all).

Another day of video games and trying to fight my feelings for him. Him and I would either team up against other characters in the game (for example my cousin Jerry) or I'd find that we cheered each other on. It was really awesome to hear that someone believed in me, because I know I'm not the best player in this game. The biggest thing for me was trying to forget how I felt or ignore my feelings completely. But at the end of the day, that proved to be quite pointless. Jerry, Eric, and Jared spent the majority of the day at our house playing video games against myself, my cousin, and my brother. It was around dinner time that my uncle came to pick them up and take them home.

After they left, I found myself assessing my feelings for him again. I wanted to get closer to him for some reason, so I decided I might friend request him on Facebook. After some serious Facebook stalking, I decided it might be best to move slower and friend request him later. He creeped into my thoughts several times between this visit and the next. I couldn't help myself, it just kind of happened. I can't say I'm okay with the way I felt, but there was no way that I could hide or ignore these feelings anymore. There were way too many subconscious cues I was unaware of. The connection, the chemistry, was all there. But I just hoped that it would not create any problems in the future. I spent the next couple of days wondering when I would see the three of them again, but mostly him. Hopefully things don't get too complicated. . .