With Love Dr. Spencer Reid...

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Among men and women, those in love do not always announce themselves with declarations and vows. But they are the ones who weep when you're gone. Who miss you every single night, especially when the sky is so deep and beautiful, and the ground so very cold. - Alice Hoffman

/./././././././././././././Allie/././././././././././././././././././

I think it was strange almost that I had missed Reid this much, we had never went on a date, or even talked in person that often, we'd only met twice, but I still missed him. It had been 3 weeks he'd been gone, and I'd been texting him and calling him to see how he was. He said he was working on a long case and that he didn't know when he'd be back, and he couldn't share much. I understood that, I worked in a hospital and confidentiality was key.

But even though we only text, we would still joke and flirt, I thought it was flirting, and then I would tell him all about my roommate and how she watched the latest dr. who episode or bought a TARDIS something or other. Reid would often explain to me, what those things were, from dr. who and I appreciated that, even though I really didn't care too much about dr who. It was more of an excuse to talk to him.

"When's he coming back?" My roommate was sitting beside me on the couch, eating her subway and watching her Dr. Who. I was sitting beside her, but instead of watching Dr. Who or eating, I was looking at my phone, scrolling through my facebook newsfeed.

"He doesn't know but I hope it isn't too long." I smiled at my phone, thinking back to our previous and most recent conversation.

"Who were you in highschool?" I knew that it was a fairly loaded question to ask Spencer, especially since he seemed to have such little time to talk.

"What?" He seemed surprised and a little nervous by my question and I had worried that I had offended him. I started to backpedal until he answered my question.

"I was a genius. Still am. I have an IQ of 187 and I was smarter than everyone in my school." They way he said it didn't sound arrogant. He was stating a fact and he sounded hesitant when he spoke.

From what I gathered about Spencer Reid was that he was a genius, a young genius in highschool who probably got tortured and picked on for his brains. It made me sad to think that he was so young, and probably just wanted some friends and to have a good time in school.

"What happened to you? In school? There's a hardened tone to your voice. Something bad must have happened to you in school." I was met with silence and now I knew that I had gone too far.

"I have to go." Click. The line was dead and I was left with silence. I frowned and pulled the phone away from my ear and locked it, dropping it on my bed.

"Great."

"There's someone knocking on the door." I snapped out of my thoughts and stood up, knowing that my roommate wouldn't get up and answer it.

I walked towards the front door, the echo of the tv behind me, and the sound of my feet against the carpet. I smiled at my roommates cries of joy when someone or something was defeated. Once I got to the door, I turned the knob and opened it and instead of seeing anyone on the other side, there was a single red rose laying on the ground.

I bent down and picked it up, inspecting it for a note or something, but there was nothing but the rose and a black ribbon tied around it.

/./././././././././././Spencer/././././././././././

This case was almost over. I knew it and I had a good feeling about it. I knew we would be close enough to catching the guy, we had already saved one victim, it was just actually catching him. He was gone by the time we had pulled into the driveway of the house, leaving nothing but the woman, and she was alive.

"He's going to be going after another victim and you just want to wait until that happens?" The detective on the case had become quite angry over the last few days, especially since we were closing in on this guy, but couldn't quite get him yet.

"That's not what we're saying. What we're saying is that we'll talk to the victim and find out how he got in and that should be the missing piece we need." JJ was good at her job, she was good at talking to people and being the liaison between us and the world. But sometimes I wonder how she did it. I would've lost my patience and snapped at them.

Then again, I was 'moody' lately according to the team.

"Bet you can't wait to get back home." Emily was the latest one that would try and talk to me, try and get through to me.

I wasn't moody because of Allie, yet she was the exact reason I was. I had never felt the feeling of love, besides my mother and sometimes that was so laced with guilt that I couldn't make out which one had won.

Allie had asked me who I was in highschool and not only had I drawn a blank but I had completely froze at the question. It's usually a question friends ask, and by any definition Allie and I were friends, but it had brought back many terrible memories that I would never be able to forget.

"You don't know what you're talking about." My mother had once said that love is the end all be all of life. She said that without love, we are nothing but cold and empty inside. She said that love can change who we are and what we are if we feel the full extent of it.

I was not in love with Allie, it was way too soon and we hadn't even been on a date, no date and no other communications other than phone calls and text messages. But maybe there was merit to my mothers words, not in the sense that I had felt love, but in the sense that there was a lack of love. Maybe I had become moody and cold because I had wanted love.

"Reid we all know you've been moody lately and we just think that you can't wait to go home to see..." I cut her off with a sharp, anger filled tone.

"No." It was only one word but it made Emily stop and walk away from me, the way she came.

There was something going on with me and it was messing me up in more ways than intellectually.