Punch Drunk Recreation

I sat in Math class, staring at the clock. Five more minutes separating me from winter break. “Ms. Russo, what’s your answer for number seven?” my professor asked, catching on that my attention was elsewhere. “Uhh…pass?” I questioned, the entire class bursting into laughter. “Pay attention Ms. Russo. Class isn’t over for another three minutes.” Professor Stickney said, continuing to embarrass me. I buried my face in my hands, wishing the bell would ring. “Chapters 30-50 will be due when I see you next year.” Professor Stickney teased as he wrote “NO HOMEWORK” on the white board behind him.

The bell finally rang and I was the first one out of my seat. I had the first semester of my senior year of college complete. I was more ready than ever to spend winter break with my best friend. I sprinted back to my apartment which was less than a mile from campus. I reached my apartment building minutes later and immediately grew disappointed. My best friends’ girlfriend’s car was parked in front of our building. I thought I was going to throw up. He had promised it would be the two of us our entire break because she was moving in with her parents who lived four hours away.

The closer I got to the door I could hear Jesse and Kayli fighting. Kayli was horrible with long distance, she had been the day her and Jesse began dating three years ago. She hated the fact he was always surrounded by girls, and when she found out his best friend was a girl she blew a gasket. I stood in front of the door, hesitating to open it.

“Have fun with your lousy best friend, ass hole!” Kayli yelled, ripping the door open. Her face went white the moment she saw me. “Move bitch!” she spat, pushing past me. I had never been a fan of hers, and she definitely wasn’t helping any. “Uhh what was that all about?” I asked, slowly walking into the apartment I shared with my best friend. “I think it’s over for good this time Em. I don’t think she’s messing around.” Jesse explained, running a hand through his beautiful brown hair. “It better be. Jesse you deserve a million times better than her, and you know it! Why is she so upset anyway?” I asked, already knowing the answer. “She wanted me to stay with her and her parents during winter break. She doesn’t like that you and me are going to be spending our entire break together. She clearly doesn’t recall that we live together and already see one another every day.” Jesse rambled, pacing the small living room floor. “You better not bail on me Jesse. I’ve been looking forward to this for months.” I warned, my blood beginning to boil. “I’m not going to bail on you Emerson. You’re my best friend for crying out loud!” Jesse smiled, pulling me in for a tight hug. “Let’s make this the best winter break ever.” I grinned, growing excited by the minute. “Come on, we still have to go shopping for the party tonight!” Jesse reminded me, grabbing my hand and pulling me out the door.

We arrived at the local grocery store, Jesse wearing the best disguise he could; a hat, sunglasses and a fake moustache, very original. We basically ran through the store, grabbing all of the essentials we would need for the greatest party ever. I grabbed the plastic cups for beer pong along with a variety of snacks. Jesse was in charge of the alcohol. We proceeded to the checkout and $750 later we were out of the grocery store. It only took us fifteen minutes to spend that kind of money. That had to be some kind of record. As we loaded everything into the car, Jesse’s cell phone started going off. I knew who it was before he could tell me.

“It’s Kayli, what do I do?” he asked, staring at his phone. “Don’t answer it, she broke up with you remember?” I instructed, snatching the phone from his hands. I stuffed it into my purse, jumping into the passenger’s seat. “Do me a favor tonight Em. Don’t let me hook up with ANYONE. Got it? The last thing I need is to make some girl my rebound.” Jesse explained, driving us home. “I’ll do my best, but you know how we both get when we drink.” I reminded him, growing shy. “Psh both of us? Speak for yourself hun!” Jesse teased, his perfect white teeth smiling at me. “I think alcohol makes every girl horny. You better watch yourself tonight or you’ll get raped by some fan in your own home.” I laughed, smiling right back at him.

Jesse and I got everything set up before we gave everyone the okay to come over. We sat and watched TV a bit, already drinking a couple of beers. “Ha. Remember the last party we threw? That was a disaster.” I recalled, beginning to laugh. “All I remember is you throwing up all over Jake.” Jesse said, joining in on the laughter. “Maybe that’s why he broke up with me.” I shrugged, chugging the last of my beer. I stood up to grab another drink as I listened to Jesse laugh uncontrollably.

“Should I have worn the black dress I bought the other day, or is this one okay?” I asked, realizing I hadn’t looked at myself in the mirror since that morning. “You look great Em. I always think you look good, especially in red.” Jesse winked, making his way over to me. “Awwa thanks Jess, you’re the best.” I smiled, a few butterflies forming in my stomach. That was a new feeling. Jesse and I had been best friend since third grade. Not once have I looked at him as more than a best friend. But in that moment I felt something I had never felt before. The way he looked at me made me feel special; I had never felt like that with any other guy before. I snapped out of my thoughts, someone was at the door.

“Let’s get this party started!” Sam yelled, bursting through the door. “You’re the first one here, Sam.” Jesse laughed, giving him a ‘bro hug’. “I am the party man, shit just got real.” Sam joked, pulling me in for a hug. “Damn Emerson, you got hot.” Sam complimented, looking me up and down. I grew more self conscious by the second, watching his eyes travel across every part of my body. I noticed Jesse doing it too, and at that very moment I thought I was going to throw up. “Uhh thanks Sam.” I smirked, going back to my spot on the couch. Tonight was going to be interesting.

The windows shook as the music blared loudly throughout the apartment. Jesse had invited a handful of his close friends and I had done the same. There were over fifty people crammed into our small apartment. I barely recognized anyone and it was causing my anxiety to sky rocket. I shoved my way to the kitchen, mixing myself a rum and coke, extra rum. I downed it within three minutes, immediately making a new one. By my fifth drink my anxiety had subsided, and the only thing I wanted was to find Jesse. I pulled out my cell phone, thinking it’d be the easiest way to find him. When my purse started vibrating on the counter I remembered I had taken his phone and never gave it back. Sober Emerson would have never done what drunk Emerson was about to do. I took Jesse’s phone out of my purse, scrolling through the hundreds of contacts listed in his iPhone. I stopped once I reached Kayli’s name, and without snooping on their previous conversations, I quickly sent her a text as though I were Jesse.

Glad we broke up. Now I can finakkyt b wirh Emerson!!! So glas Ur not @ my oarty rifht now!
To: Kayli<3

December 11, 10:03 pm

I smiled to myself as I hit send, putting his phone back in my purse as I began searching the apartment for Jesse. I couldn’t find him anywhere, and I was really hoping he wasn’t hooking up with some random girl. Immediately I stumbled to his room running into three of my ex-boyfriends on the way, each of them complimenting me, not okay. When I finally reached his door, it was locked. I dropped to my knees, tears immediately blurring my vision. I had failed my best friend, but I wasn’t sure the tears were because of that.

“Oh my god, it’s really you! It’s Jesse fucking McCartney!” a girl screamed behind me. I stood up from the floor, standing on my tiptoes to see over the sea of people. Sure enough, Jesse was standing by the patio door, being mauled by four or five girls. I pushed through the crowd once more, stumbling over to Jesse. “Get off of him!” I yelled, watching the girls grow scared. “Whoa Emerson, calm down.” Jesse said, slurring his words uncontrollably. “You should come with me Jesse.” I said, grabbing his hand. “Ooh where are you taking me?” Jesse asked, biting his lip. “Outside, you need fresh air.” I instructed, pushing him through the open patio door. I closed it behind us, sitting next to Jesse on the wooden beams. “I am sooooo glad you’re my best friend, Emerson. You’re like, the best thing that has ever happened to me.” Jesse slurred, reaching for my hand a few times before successfully grabbing it. “I can’t believe we’ve stayed friends this long. I thought once you became famous you’d leave me in the dust.” I admitted, resting my head on Jesse’s shoulder. “You’re the last person I would leave in the dust Em. You mean so much to me.” Jesse smiled, running his fingers through my mess of curls.

Jesse moved his fingers from my hair to my cheek, slowly turning my face toward him. I looked up at him hesitantly, the same look in his eyes I had seen him give Kayli hundreds of times when they first started dating. The only difference was his gaze was stronger toward me, and it sent chills throughout my entire body.

“Hey Je-Oh dude, sorry, I didn’t know you weren’t alone.” Sam apologized, sliding the patio door shut, only to open it just as quickly. “Hey what the hell dude, that’s not Kayli?!” Sam said, tearing the two of us away from each other. “I know Sam, can’t you see you’re interrupting something here!?” Jesse yelled as he stood up and got in Sam’s face. “Yeah you were trying to mack on my girlfriend.” Sam yelled back, lightly shoving Jesse. “I believe she’s your ex, and don’t fucking touch me dude.” Jesse spat, anger growing evident in his tone. “Then don’t touch Emerson and I’ll back off.” Sam fought back, walking closer to me. “Come on baby, you know you miss this.” Sam smirked, wrapping his arms around me. “Sam, get off of me!” I cried, struggling to escape his tight hold. “Not until you agree to make sweet love to me one last time.” Sam insisted, kissing up and down my neck. “Back the fuck off dude!” Jesse shouted, bringing his fist into contact with Sam’s face.

Sam fell to the ground, unconscious. A group of people had formed around the patio door, and the moment Sam hit the floor everyone began cheering. I didn’t know when it happened, but I was crying. I felt so violated and disgusting. I shoved through the crowd, making my way to my bedroom. I slammed the door shut, wishing at that moment that I had a lock. My head was spinning and I wasn’t sure if it was from the alcohol or all of the adrenaline coursing through my veins. I couldn’t believe Sam had done that. I wish I would have punched him myself. I walked to the bathroom, splashing cold water on my face at an attempt to calm myself down. The only thing on my mind was drinking more alcohol. I walked back into the kitchen, everyone’s eyes elsewhere thankfully. I took three straight shots of vodka, knowing I wouldn’t remember a thing in the morning. My thoughts were interrupted when the entire group of people that were once dancing began cheering and hollering. I averted my attention to the dance floor, only to find Jesse and a complete stranger making out in the middle of everyone. My knees buckled beneath me and I fell to the floor for the second time that night.

“I guess this breakup was for the best, huh?” Kayli shouted, standing in the doorway. The room grew silent as everyone turned to look at Jesse’s ex. “Kayli, WH-what are you doing here?” Jesse slurred, staggering in the direction of Kayli. “I got your text. I can’t stand the thought of you and that slut together.” Kayli explained, pointing in my general direction. I raised my shot glass toward her, taking my fourth shot of vodka. “I never texted you Kails, I don’t even have my phone on me.” Jesse mumbled, placing a hand on Kayli’s cheek. “How about you stay and have a couple drinks with me. There’s room in my bed for you tonight.” Jesse insisted, leading Kayli into the kitchen.

She stood right next to me, neither of us saying a word as Jesse mixed the two of them a drink. I felt as though I was going to puke, mostly from disappointment, but also because of the four shots I had taken in the last ten minutes. I shoved past Kayli, only to fall flat on my face a few steps later. “Emerson are you okay?” Jesse yelled, walking towards me. “Stay away from me!” I cried, familiar tears distorting my vision. With much difficulty I stood up to walk away. A random guy ran up to me, wrapping his arm around me. I hadn’t been this drunk since my 21st birthday a few months back. I grabbed the bottle of vodka off of the counter and took a few swigs out of it before I accepted the strangers help to the bathroom.

I remember screaming, “You’re a total asshole, Jesse!” before everything went black.

~~~~

My head was pounding as I slowly was able to open my eyes. I wasn’t in my own room, I could tell by the smell. I slowly sat up, looking around the room. The moment I saw the Prince poster on the wall I knew I was in Jesse’s room. Immediately I began to panic, trying to recall everything that happened the night before. I was drawing a complete blank, and all of the thinking made my head pound harder. I jumped out of Jesse’s bed, deliberately making a ton of noise.

“Em…Em what are you doing in here?” Jesse asked groggily, his shaggy hair covering his eyes. “I was going to ask you the same fucking thing. What happened last night, Jesse? I can’t remember a damn thing.” I yelled, my head continuing to pound. “Calm down, would ya? Let’s talk about it over breakfast, my treat.” Jesse offered, throwing on a pair of skinny jeans. I soon realized I was standing in front of Jesse in nothing but my underwear. I searched the room for my clothes before quickly giving up, darting to my room.

There were people passed out everywhere, and the apartment was a complete mess. It was going to take hours to clean up. I pushed the mess to the back of my mind as I picked out something to wear. I felt an extreme need to shower, but I figured it would have to wait until after breakfast. Jesse wasn’t very patient. A few minutes later we were in the car and on our way to IHOP, our favorite restaurant.

The fans were horrible throughout our entire breakfast. I think I spoke a total of ten words to Jesse the hour we were there. I knew it wasn’t his fault, but I was still mad at him. I didn’t say a word to him on the way home.

“What’s going on Emerson? You’ve been acting really weird lately.” Jesse asked, pulling the car over at a nearby park. “Oh I’m acting weird? And what, you’ve just been completely normal? Yeah that’s exactly how it has been.” I fought, getting out of the car. “Emerson wait!” Jesse called after me, following directly behind me. “What Jesse? Go call your girlfriend or something. I’m sure she’s dying to hear from you, wondering how famous you are today!” I yelled, shoving him back by his shoulders. “Are you serious Emerson!? That’s why you’re upset, because I’m famous? You have absolutely no right to be mad at me because I’m successful. And what the hell do you care anyway? Plus, Kayli and I broke up, remember? I no longer have a girlfriend to call every day, so thanks!” Jesse yelled, pulling at his shaggy hair.

We stared at each other in silence, never having fought like this before throughout our entire friendship. “Whatever happened last night changed us, Jesse.” I spoke up, tears running down my face. “Emerson, we only kissed. It’s not like we slept together or anything.” Jesse admitted, taking a step closer to me. “Then why did I wake up half naked!?” I asked, racking my brain for an answer. “Well…we were really into the kiss. And when I say we, I mean you. I swear I didn’t take your clothes off, you did it all on your own.” Jesse confessed, holding his hands up before him. “That does sound like drunken Emerson…” I admitted, looking down shyly. “I-is it bad that I really liked it?” Jesse asked, swallowing nervously.

I shook my head, pulling Jesse in for a hug. The moment we touched a spark flew through my entire body. My heart pounded and my legs shook. Everything was coming back to me. After he saw the strange guy helping me to my room he stepped in, asking Kayli to leave. He had helped me into his room and that’s where things grew heated. I remembered it with such detail; it felt as though it were happening that very moment. I slowly pulled away from our hug, looking deep into Jesse’s beautiful green eyes. I knew we wanted the same thing, but I couldn’t bring myself to kiss my best friend. I didn’t want anything to ruin our friendship, so I quickly averted my eyes. “We should probably head back and start cleaning huh?” I advised, walking away from my best friend as I returned to Jesse’s Dodge Challenger. He followed behind me, neither of us saying another word the entire ride back to our apartment.