Angel From My Nightmare

June 2009

Alex awoke to the sound of his alarm, the noise piercing into his dreams and pulling him into reality. He groaned and reached over to set the damn thing off, sending his room back into silence. He laid back on his bed, running a hand through his hair as his dream came back to him. It was a dream he’d gotten used to as of late, the same dream again and again, of the same person. A person with raven black hair who was holding tight onto Alex’s hand as they ran, ran from something unseen. Alex tried to shake the memory of the dream but it clang to him like the cold sweat on his brow. Deciding he has to get up anyway he heads for the shower, trying to put the raven haired boy out of his mind.
Once showered, dressed and with a stomach full of toast and coffee Alex was in the car driving towards his friend Zack’s house. They had band practise, well they went exactly a band just him, Zack and a kid called Rian, Alex never thought they were that good but he enjoyed it even if it did get him out of bed before noon on a weekend.
“Hey Alex, how’s it going?” Zack greeted, opening the front door to the older boy.
“Not bad, why are we doing this so early again?” Alex asked, as Zack lead him down the basement. The only place in the house Zack’s parents had allowed them to practise.
“We’ve got a gig, remember?”
“Oh yeah... What is that girl... Hmm Lisa’s birthday?”
“Yeah that’s it”
Taking his guitar and doing his best to get into tune Alex took his place in the middle, with Zack on his left and Rian behind, no body to his right.
“Ready?” Rian called.
“Yeah!”
“One... One, two, three” Rian hit his symbol and the song began. Even with crappy little amps and numb fingers they managed to get out a few Blink covers, they hadn’t got anything original yet.
“You okay Alex?” Rian asked after the fifth song.
“Yeah, why?”
“You keep looking to the right, like something’s distracting you”
“Am I? Oh...” Alex knew he kept looking, it just felt like there was someone there, or maybe that someone should be there...
“Have we ever thought about getting another guitarist?” Alex asked.
“No, why do you think we need one?” Rian asked.
“I don’t know, it just doesn’t feel right” Alex admitted.
“Maybe we’ll look about getting one, after this gig” Zack said.
They continued practising for a few more hours, chucking in a few Green Day and a Jimmy Eat World cover just to mix it up a bit. Alex was still distracted, it was like there was something in the corner of his eye that he couldn’t quite see but knew was there.

After packing the van with all their instruments, which was like a game of tetris and lots of arguments between Rian and Alex the band was finally ready to go. With Zack driving, Alex in passenger and Rian squished in the back, Alex just stared out of the window trying to put off any preshow nervous when something catches his eye again, a person out the window with raven coloured hair. When Zack asked Alex why he was shaking Alex just said nerves, he couldn’t say that he thought the boy from his dream was following him...
“Alex!” the cheer of a girls voice, put the boy from Alex’s mind as she came running up to him and wrapped her arms around his waist.
“Hey Juliet”
“How’s my favourite rock-star?” she asked, kissing him on the cheek.
“A bit nervous I think, but okay”
“You’ll do great and I’ll be at the front cheering you on” she beamed, Alex found himself having to force a smile back. Him and Juliet had been dating just over a year now but more and more these days things just felt... Off between the two of them, or least Alex thought so. Alex forced himself to listen as she babbled on about her day at college as the band set up, nodding and making ‘hmm’ noises when she paused long enough for him to get a word in. He always used to enjoy her endless energy but lately he was becoming tired of it.

“HELLOOO EVERYBODY” Alex yelled into the mic.
The small ground of people round their make-shift stage cheered back.
“Who’s ready to party?” Another cheer and Alex smiled.
“Right, that’s what I like to hear! This song is called What’s My Age Again?”
“I took her out, it was Friday night.
I wore cologne to get the feeling right.
We started making out, and she took off my pants.
But I turned on the TV”
Once the first lyrics were out Alex felt calmer, his voice ringing out in the tiny room just a tiny bit louder. They’d just finished Dammit when it happened, that flash in the corner of his eye that had him looking to the right again. It was that feeling of someone standing there, Alex tried to ignore it but it’s like he could feel someone standing beside him, that presence that never quite left him. Every time he turned to look no one was there, Juliet kept giving him worried looks from her front row spot but he ignored her. It wasn’t until the last song he saw it, that flash in the corner of his eye that had him snapping around to see, expect this time he saw a boy. The same boy with the dark hair was standing there with a guitar but the second Alex blinked he was gone.
At first Alex had been able to pass off this strange feeling as his imagination or least he’d tried to but the whole thing was actually beginning to scare him. He was forced to put the whole thing out of his mind as a pair of arms snaked around his waist.
“You did great! I’ve been telling everyone about my rock-star boyfriend!”
“You think we did okay?” Alex asked.
“Great, fantastic, amazing!”
“Well thanks Juli” She dragged him off to get a drink before he’d had a chance to talk to Zack about the show.
“So I was telling Lisa about you and she was like, yeah he’s cute and I was like back off he’s mine...” Juliet continued to chat away but Alex wasn’t really listening, drink in hand he was scanning the other party goers looking for the strange dark haired boy but he was nowhere to be seen, the thought sent a shiver up his spine.
“Alex? Alex, are you listening to me?” Juliet’s voice snapped his back to reality.
“What?”
“Alex you weren’t listening! I was trying to tell about this friend of Lisa’s....”
“You know what Juliet, I really don’t care”
“Alex...”
“I’m sorry, you just talk so much”
“Oh...”
“Look Juliet, I don’t think we should go out anymore. I just... I just can’t do this anymore” I just can’t lie to myself anymore, he thought. Lying to himself that he still cared when he didn’t, trying to fake a smile every time he saw her, enough was enough.
“But Alex...”
“I’m sorry Juliet, I’m not in love with you anymore”
“Wh...Wh...What? Is there someone else?” she squeaked, tears making marks in her mascara.
“No, I’ve just had enough okay? Enough of acting like I still care when I don’t, it’s over”
Alex walked away, just in time to hear Juliet burst into tears behind him.
With no way home expect the van Alex sat in the garden of the house and waiting for his fellow band mates give up on their hopeless dreams of getting laid. He sat on the garden wall, a paper cup still half full of beer in his hands as he stared up at the sky. Had he done the right thing breaking up with Juliet? Probably, well it was true he didn’t love her anymore but the question was why not? She hadn’t changed, but it seemed he had. He could no longer look at her and feel the butterflies in his stomach, it was like he was being drawn away from her, but towards who? He sighed, the stars held no answers.

It was another two hours before Alex was finally able to drag his friends to the van, being the most sober of the three of them he drove them all back to Zack’s place. Zack offered him to stay the night but Alex declined, he wanted to go home. Getting in his own car, his friends waved him off and he left. He was nearly half way home when something outside in the darkness caught his eye, probably just an animal he tried to reassure himself but it was still there. Alex looked out the window and there sure enough was the same dark haired boy walking along the lamp lit street. Alex was too busy staring out the window to notice the corner coming up, Alex lost control and the car flipped....