Ethan Daniels: A Thousand Words

The way life was going the first couple of years actually made me believe everything would be normal. But things turned around and normality spit in my face and said, "You wish you knew what I was!" Now, I'm not saying my life turned out to be this fantastical life where I learned magical new things like Harry Potter or something, however awesome that would be and however simple it would be to lie to you about that. No. My life is no fairy tale. But its no snoozer either. I guess its sort of a happy medium.

Anyways, I'll just get to the point.

I was born in 1996, then my sister, and my best friend, was born in 2001.. Her name was Grace, and I swear it was by grace alone she was even born. See, my mom was not even supposed to have kids, and just giving birth to me was a miracle all on its own. But what's next, she has yet another kid, a girl this time, five years later. Its actually kind of a cinematic story the way Grace and I became so close. Its basically the same way any strong friendship is formed. At least, it happens that way a lot in movies and books and stuff. At first, Grace and I were sworn enemies. I was so used to being the center of attention, the Miracle Child, the most precious most wonderful thing that had ever happened ever. Then this sniveling little snot-faced rug rat came along and stole that all away. Of course, I was bitter at first, but I got over it. I realized I was being selfish and I should give the kid a chance. She turned out to be a good kid too. I loved her more than I loved anything else. She was like my other half. I actually cannot believe I ever lived without her...

Before I get distracted from this subject again, let me introduce myself. My name is Ethan Daniels, born and bred in the great city of New York and totally full of issues. Well, now, at least. It wasn't always like this. Life, I mean...

How about I begin the journey through my life by telling you about what I do best? I am a monster hunter. I started this insane hobby a while back, when I was ten years old and just finished an episode of "Bigfoot: The Mystery of the Hidden Beast" and realized "Hey, this stuff might not be complete nonsense after all..." Plus, the photographs they showed on that show were phenomenal, and with my God-given talent of handling a camera, I figured I could do as much, if not better.

So that's what I did. I spent all day researching exactly where to find a specific creature, and then basically spent all night not finding it. I guess I was better off during those days, because the one time I finally did find what I was looking for, I lost more than just a good night's sleep.

It was September 24th, 2012 -- decidedly the worst day of my entire monster hunting career. I wrote a rule for myself to never go on a mission without a partner. Don't you dare think I took Grace with me, she was only eleven years old and I think I have made it clear that I am not into dragging young and innocent people into dangerous situations. Well, besides myself, of course. And my best friend Shiloh. He was my partner on the mission, and gee WHIZ did I get a lecture from him before we went.

"Dude!" He shouted at me as I packed my camera into its black zip-up bag, "Are you positive -- I mean ABSOLUTELY POSITIVE -- that you want to go and hunt one of the monster hunting world's most feared creatures of all time?"

"Seriously?" I replied, resisting the urge to roll my eyes, "I've told you a MILLION times not to exaggerate, Shiloh."

The irony of that statement. But it was true. I mean, a banshee is not one of the 'most feared creatures of all time'. Statistics show that only forty-eight percent of the monster hunting community even know what a banshee is. Which reminds me, I should probably explain.

Banshees are ghost-like creatures, usually, if not always, in the form of a woman, who dwell in bogs and are almost always heard before they are seen-- if you have the privilege of seeing one, of course. The thing that freaks people out the most about them is the loud, bone-chilling screeching sound they make. If you hear this sound, it can mean one of two things: you are either in serious danger of getting seriously injured, or just doomed to die. Luckily, my fate chose the former. I guess Shiloh was right to try and convince me out of it. But TRYING to was about as far as he got.

"What if one of us hear the call, Ethan?" he carried on.

"But what if we don't?" I replied, "I mean, its rare to hear a banshee call anyway."

"Yeah, and even RARER to snap a shot of one!"

Clearly Shiloh was not getting my point.

"Man, look." I slung my camera bag over my shoulder, "Getting rare shots is what I live for. And since a picture of me in front of the Hogwarts Castle in Harry Potter World is just about the rarest picture I've ever gotten, I've sorta figured I should reach for new heights."

In case you are wondering-- yes. I AM a bit of a Harry Potter nerd. But that completely distracts you from my point: I needed to get at least one photo of at least one monster. I had been monster hunting for six years and I was not ready to give up just yet.

"Ethan!" Shiloh rushed towards the door and stood in front of it like he was protecting his lover from gunfire or something, "you have to listen to me, man. Why don't you just wait until you find a monster that doesn't spell out inevitable doom?"

"But those are the best kind." I replied, "Now, could you please step away from the door?"

"Not if it means we're still going on this mission."

I rolled my eyes this time. "Okay, look. If you really, really don't want to go... we don't have to."

Shiloh sighed in relief, "I knew you'd say that." He turned around and put his hand on the doorknob, then swung back around, "Or- I guess I should say I hoped and prayed that you would but didn't really expect you'd give in." He gave me an awkward smile.

"What are you talking about?" I asked him.

"Oh, nothing. Let's hang out in here for a while. You still have that awesome card game in here, right?" His voice was shaky, not to mention he spoke at a million miles an hour.

"Okay, what is going on with you?" I finally asked, after trying to determine whether he was smiling at me or just showing me all his teeth.

He stood closer to the door, "Nothing. I just want to play a card game."

"No, something's up." I walked up to him and pulled him away from the door by his arm. I examined the door up and down, then tried the knob. The door wouldn't budge. And what's worse, it wasn't even locked. "What did you do to my door?"

"Well, you see--" Shiloh began, but he was cut off by the sound of my sister's voice on the other side of the door.

"Shiloh told me he'd take me to McDonald's if I glued your door shut!"

My eyes widened. Its almost insane the things that little girl would do for McDonald's. She would circumnavigate the world if that's what it took to get a few greasy fries and a cherry cola. I blinked, then sighed, then blinked again. I was absolutely speechless. But not really in an angry sort of way. I was more touched, oddly enough.

"You were THAT worried for me?" I finally managed to mutter, "I mean, you really care that much about me?"

"I just don't want you getting yourself killed out there, Ethan. Think about what that would do to me. To Grace. We'd be lost without you, man."

I probably would have gone in for a man hug if I hadn't noticed Shiloh's nervous lying twitch. Whenever Shiloh lied to me, I could tell in an instant because his eyes would shift away from mine and his right leg would go spastic.

I gave him a suspicious look, "I know what this is really about."

He gulped. He knew I caught his leg doing the jig.

"You're just scared of going with me. You've always been scared of ghosts ever since Christine trapped you in the Haunted House ride at Horrorland."

I guess I couldn't blame him. Horrorland was horrific, almost as horrific as Christine Johnston. I mean, she was gorgeous, and I'm sure she meant well (sometimes), but man did I hate that chick. Christine is to Ethan as Draco is to Harry. We were sworn enemies. But you know how that turns out.

"I still have nightmares, man!" Shiloh squeaked, "I can't do ghosts -- or banshees, which are basically the same thing!"

"Okay, okay." I put my camera bag down and sat on my bed. I patted the space beside me and Shiloh slowly stepped towards me in shame. He sat down, his leg finally ending its dance solo.

"Listen to me, okay?" I said, calmly. Shiloh nodded. "For six whole years I've been waiting and waiting and waiting for a chance at a great shot for my monster album-- which is empty, by the way. And for six whole years you've been totally awesome about it. You've even gone with me, no matter how many times I've gotten nothing better than a photo of an ant on a log. But now, because of one experience nearly TEN years ago, you decide to ditch me?"

"This is the anniversary, actually." Shiloh whimpered.

"Which makes it all the better." I said reassuringly, "What better time to overcome a fear than on the night it became a fear in the first place? How cool is that? Think about it this way: after I get my shot, you can personally show it to Christine Johnston next time you see her at school and tell her you're not afraid of a stupid ghost."

"If there IS a next time, you mean."

"There will be." My watched beeped. I checked the time. "We're running out of time. My research says the best time is exactly 12:15 a.m. That gives us fifteen minutes to get to the bog. Now, I'm going either way, even if its against my rules. So, now its just up to you. Do you want to come with me, or stay behind un-gluing my bedroom door?"

Shiloh rubbed his fuzzy afro and huffed, "Fine, I'll go. But just because it sounds more interesting than scraping glue out of door hinges with your little sister."

"Great!" I gave him a quick man-hug and jumped off my bed.

"Hey," he said, "I'd better not regret this."

"Trust me, man." I said, "It'll be life changing."

Man was I right about THAT.