Storm Warning
Four.
I tried once again telling him that I felt used and that wasn’t part of our deal. He would tell me that I was just overthinking it all and being dramatic. I tried not to let it bother me, I shouldn’t. He wasn’t with anyone as far as I knew, so at least that was one good thing, that I just kept telling myself.
I had a few friends on different NHL teams, a few of them tried to ask me out but I always said no. I wouldn’t do that to Sidney and I just told them I was too busy for dating. Sometimes I think I should have done it, maybe hurt him a little.
Each time I said something, he would be better, but that would only last for so long. It finally got to a point where, we would hardly talk at the rink. Basically, only for something important or an event.
A couple guys did notice. Finally after months, I had a major heart to heart with Kris Letang. He was basically like my older brother. He said he kinda had a feeling since Sidney would act weird sometimes and when they went out, he didn’t pay too much attention to other girls who tried to get with him.
He told the guys that he had someone for that and didn’t need to get it from a random. At least he cared in that way. That made me feel a tiny bit better. Kris still said he didn’t have the right to act like he sometimes did. Kris though he should be treating me better and didn’t understand why he couldn’t commit since we basically were acting like we were dating.
I felt a lot better after the talk with Kris. I was trying so hard not to give into Sidney. Since then he started with the, “well you will be gone soon talks”. Which made no sense since I was coming back to the team next season for my last year and internship. The office loved all the hard work I had been putting into the club. I have been working my ass off to get a hockey job when I graduate and this was a huge step for myself.
A few days went by. The girls were over for one of our many girls night. I told them everything Kris said and what Sidney was saying now.
They said I should just go on a date with someone else just to piss him off. But I didn’t want too since I didn’t want to make him angry or upset. They though that was a dumb thing to say, since he could do anything and get away with it. Which I knew, they were right. I had to start standing up for myself.
And boy was I right after Sidney heard about going out to dinner with Nathan Mackinnon. He was in town and a friend from back home. It was nice to be able to see someone from Halifax, other than Sidney.
A few days after, Sidney finally talked to me about it. I wouldn’t bring it up.
“Why did you go out with Nate?” Sidney asked.
“He is a hometown friend. I wanted to see him.” I told him.
“What did you guys do.” He asked?
“We went to dinner. I don’t see why this a big deal.” I said.
“Though we agreed on not flirting with guys who are like my brother.” He said. I laughed.
“I went to dinner with him. I didn’t sleep with him.” I began. “Thanks for thinking I am that easy.”
“I didn’t mean it like that, AJ.” He replied.
“You made it very clear, you don’t want to be anything more than fuck buddies.” I began. I could feel everything coming up. Tears were starting to form, but I tried everything not to start crying. “I don’t see why this should bother you in anyway. You and Nate aren’t that close. If I want to sleep with you, I can’t talk to ANY hockey player?”
“AJ, stop. You are overacting.” He said.
“Says the one who just got mad because I went to dinner with another hockey player.” I said. “You are the confusing one. I have done EVERYTHING you asked and I still get nothing for it.”
“Maybe we should just stop all this.” He said.
“Maybe we said. Go have fun with the other girls who can’t tell the different between a face-off and icing.” I said.
“Go have fun sleeping with my teammates.” He said. I lost it at this point, I started bawling it.
“Get the fuck out.” I said. Slamming the door on his face.
I slide down the door. I placed my face into my hands and just cried. I couldn’t believe he would actually say something like that.
Playoffs were starting and now I really didn’t want to be around him at all. I just wanted to punch him.
The girls came over as soon as I text them. We basically laid in my bed while I cried and yelled. I was so mad at myself for ever letting him back into my life.
“Why didn’t I listen to you guys. You were right.” I said in between crying.
“You though he was different. We all though it.” Sam said.
“I can’t believe what he did say to you. He had no right.” Brittany said.
“I should never have let him back in.” I said. “I’m so dumb. Internship should be fun.”
“You were able to be professional at the rink for this whole time.” Sam said.
“You will be okay. It’s going to suck to see him.” Brittany began. “But you will get through this.”
“I have no idea how.” I said.
The next few days I had final papers and assignments that I had to work on. I buried myself into school work and office assignments. I got lucky that my player events, there was so no Sidney. I didn’t tell anyone else what went on. I didn’t even tell Kris, though he could tell I wasn’t myself.
The sad part is after about a week or so of not talking to Sidney, I started too miss him. He was one of the only guys I could just be myself around.
I had a few friends on different NHL teams, a few of them tried to ask me out but I always said no. I wouldn’t do that to Sidney and I just told them I was too busy for dating. Sometimes I think I should have done it, maybe hurt him a little.
Each time I said something, he would be better, but that would only last for so long. It finally got to a point where, we would hardly talk at the rink. Basically, only for something important or an event.
A couple guys did notice. Finally after months, I had a major heart to heart with Kris Letang. He was basically like my older brother. He said he kinda had a feeling since Sidney would act weird sometimes and when they went out, he didn’t pay too much attention to other girls who tried to get with him.
He told the guys that he had someone for that and didn’t need to get it from a random. At least he cared in that way. That made me feel a tiny bit better. Kris still said he didn’t have the right to act like he sometimes did. Kris though he should be treating me better and didn’t understand why he couldn’t commit since we basically were acting like we were dating.
I felt a lot better after the talk with Kris. I was trying so hard not to give into Sidney. Since then he started with the, “well you will be gone soon talks”. Which made no sense since I was coming back to the team next season for my last year and internship. The office loved all the hard work I had been putting into the club. I have been working my ass off to get a hockey job when I graduate and this was a huge step for myself.
A few days went by. The girls were over for one of our many girls night. I told them everything Kris said and what Sidney was saying now.
They said I should just go on a date with someone else just to piss him off. But I didn’t want too since I didn’t want to make him angry or upset. They though that was a dumb thing to say, since he could do anything and get away with it. Which I knew, they were right. I had to start standing up for myself.
And boy was I right after Sidney heard about going out to dinner with Nathan Mackinnon. He was in town and a friend from back home. It was nice to be able to see someone from Halifax, other than Sidney.
A few days after, Sidney finally talked to me about it. I wouldn’t bring it up.
“Why did you go out with Nate?” Sidney asked.
“He is a hometown friend. I wanted to see him.” I told him.
“What did you guys do.” He asked?
“We went to dinner. I don’t see why this a big deal.” I said.
“Though we agreed on not flirting with guys who are like my brother.” He said. I laughed.
“I went to dinner with him. I didn’t sleep with him.” I began. “Thanks for thinking I am that easy.”
“I didn’t mean it like that, AJ.” He replied.
“You made it very clear, you don’t want to be anything more than fuck buddies.” I began. I could feel everything coming up. Tears were starting to form, but I tried everything not to start crying. “I don’t see why this should bother you in anyway. You and Nate aren’t that close. If I want to sleep with you, I can’t talk to ANY hockey player?”
“AJ, stop. You are overacting.” He said.
“Says the one who just got mad because I went to dinner with another hockey player.” I said. “You are the confusing one. I have done EVERYTHING you asked and I still get nothing for it.”
“Maybe we should just stop all this.” He said.
“Maybe we said. Go have fun with the other girls who can’t tell the different between a face-off and icing.” I said.
“Go have fun sleeping with my teammates.” He said. I lost it at this point, I started bawling it.
“Get the fuck out.” I said. Slamming the door on his face.
I slide down the door. I placed my face into my hands and just cried. I couldn’t believe he would actually say something like that.
Playoffs were starting and now I really didn’t want to be around him at all. I just wanted to punch him.
The girls came over as soon as I text them. We basically laid in my bed while I cried and yelled. I was so mad at myself for ever letting him back into my life.
“Why didn’t I listen to you guys. You were right.” I said in between crying.
“You though he was different. We all though it.” Sam said.
“I can’t believe what he did say to you. He had no right.” Brittany said.
“I should never have let him back in.” I said. “I’m so dumb. Internship should be fun.”
“You were able to be professional at the rink for this whole time.” Sam said.
“You will be okay. It’s going to suck to see him.” Brittany began. “But you will get through this.”
“I have no idea how.” I said.
The next few days I had final papers and assignments that I had to work on. I buried myself into school work and office assignments. I got lucky that my player events, there was so no Sidney. I didn’t tell anyone else what went on. I didn’t even tell Kris, though he could tell I wasn’t myself.
The sad part is after about a week or so of not talking to Sidney, I started too miss him. He was one of the only guys I could just be myself around.