Sempiternal

“Seth, if anyone knows what kind of girl she is, it’s me. I grew up surrounded by drug addicts and alcoholics and whores. That was my life in Cincinnati. Trust me when I say that you may think you know her, you may think she’s still the same girl from five years ago or whenever, but drugs change a person. Drugs make you become someone completely different. Morals go out the window; love, sensitivity, emotion. All of that disappears once you become a drug addict, and the only thing you’re thinking of is when you’re going to get your next fix.”

“But, I-”

“But nothing! Treating her like a goddamn princess isn’t going to help her! She needs to learn how to live on her own. Be independent for once in her life. You think she would have ever gotten this job if it wasn’t for you?”

“No.”

“Exactly, because she’s a drug addict. And how is she going to repay you? Well she certainly ain’t going to send you flowers and a card with puppy dog stickers. One day you’re going to wake up, and she’s going to be gone. She’s going to take everything of value that you have, and she’s going to pawn it, because that’s what drug addicts do.”

Lucy just laid there, head resting on Roman’s shoulder, pretending to still be asleep and not eavesdropping on the conversation that was happening in the front seat.

Her stomach was tight, a lump had formed in her throat, and her palms were sweaty. Hearing this from someone who spoke less than two sentences to her, really made her blood boil. She felt like she was being squashed by an elephant.

“She’s clean now, alright? And that’s all that I want to hear about it. You don’t like her, I get it. You don’t think that I should be doing her any favors, I get it. You think one day she’s just going to desert me and take all my shit, I get it! Okay! If that ever happens, I’ll be the first to say I told you so. But I trust her.”

“Well, I don’t.”

“You don’t trust anyone, Dean.”

“I trust you.”

“Well then trust that I know what I’m doing. Can you do that?” Dean mumbled something incoherently. “And could you be a little bit nicer to her?”

“But being a dick is too much f-”

She stretched out, trying her hardest not to disturb the sleeping Samoan in the seat next to her, and let out a fake yawn. Dean and Seth immediately stopped their bickering. Seth looked at her in the rear-view and she smiled warmly at him, but that smile immediately faded when Dean turned around to face her.

“Good morning, Lindsey.” He smiled real big. His dimples indenting his scruffy cheeks.

“It’s Lucy.” Seth rolled his eyes.

“Oh!” Dean put his hand over his chest. “I am so sorry, I was thinking about another drugged up redhead. My bad. I sincerely apologize.”

“Dean.” Seth warned.

“What!? It was an honest mistake. They do kind of look alike, Seth, you have to admit.”

Lucy bit her cheek so hard she could taste the blood swirling on her tongue. Roman was starting to wake up now, and Lucy thanked God. He was definitely her favorite out of the two. Dean reached in the backseat and gave his comrade a pound on the chest.

“Ro, wake up! We’re having an important debate!”

Roman glared at Dean, and then turned to Lucy and gave her a sweet smile. “Is he always like this?” She asked him, jutting a finger towards the front, passenger seat.

“Nah, he’s just showing off.” Roman winked at her, and she immediately felt her cheeks grow hot. “Now what’s this debate about?”

“Alright,” Dean started. “Doesn’t Lucy here look a lot like Lindsay Lohan? And I’m not talking about the hot, ‘Mean Girls’ Lindsay… I’m talking about ‘coked out of her mind’ Lindsay.”

Roman looked at Seth. “Is he serious?” Seth shook his head and Roman looked back at Dean, “boy, your blind ass is about to get smacked.”

Lucy smiled, quietly thanking Roman as Dean pouted in his seat.

The rest of the ride to Hershey was quiet, with the occasional humming, or someone asking a question; which was mostly Dean asking if they were there yet. Lucy couldn’t wait to get out of the car. Away from Dean and his second-handed comments that he muttered under his breath at her. Away from Seth and they face that he wasn’t doing anything to stop him. Away from everything just for a little while to focus on making kids happy. That was her job.

When they got to the arena, she immediately split with them and headed off to find Mark, who was already setting up his side of the table. When she was finished with her side, she once again made herself useful in other areas.

“Do those chairs need to go under the ring?” She asked one of the crew members.

“Yeah, just stack them neatly under the apron.”

She went to grab a few chairs on each arm, trying to prove herself to whomever might have been watching, but it backfired in her face when the chairs went crashing to the floor.

“Hey! Are you alrigh’?” She looked up to see a funny-looking man with long, frizzy hair.

“Yeah. The uh, chairs fell… Not me. I’m okay. Just trying to do too much at once.” She replied.

“Here, let me help you.” The man bent down and grabbed all of the chairs in his arms just like Lucy was attempting to do before. She mumbled ‘show off’ under her breath, causing the man to chuckle. “Are you new on the production crew? I don’t think I’ve ever seen you around before?”

“Yeah, today is my second day, actually. And this isn’t even my job. I sell t-shirts. I’m just helping out because I was bored, and I like to learn things.”

“That’s a good quality.” He replied as he finished with the chairs. “My name’s Adam. I’m new here too, kind of. I’ll be debuting in the next couple of weeks.”

“Lucy.” She said, shaking his hand. “That’s really cool, are you excited?”

“It’s a little nerve wracking. I’ve definitely got the jitters.”

“I’m sure they’ll go away.”

Just then, Lucy’s phone vibrated in her back pocket.



Lucy quickly replied to Brie that she’d be there soon, and said her goodbyes to Adam; wishing him luck once again. When she got to catering she immediately connected eyes with Dean who was brooding at the corner table. He winked at her, but she ignored it.

Brie was with her sister Nikki who Lucy hadn’t met yet. She inwardly groaned as she approached the table, having a hard time staying focused with the plunging neckline on Nikki’s dress. Her whole body shook with insecurity.

“Lucy, this is my twin sister, Nikki.” Brie started. “Nikki this is my new friend, Lucy. She sells t-shirts upfront.”

“You say that like it’s a big deal.” Lucy replied. “So what’s up?”

Brie glanced around the room, making sure that everyone was pre-occupied. “I just wanted you to know, before you heard it from someone else, that your past…” She paused and frowned. “Well, people know about it. A lot of people. It’s been going around all day. Someone must have heard what Dean said yesterday, or maybe he told someone, but I just wanted you to know.”

“Thanks for the warning, I guess.” She sighed. “I really appreciate it.” Lucy slid her chair from underneath the table and stood up.

“If it helps,” Nikki added. “We told them it wasn’t true.”

Lucy gave her a side smile, “It helps. Thanks.” On her way out the door, she met eyes with Dean once again, and just shook her head, disappointed that he would stoop that low.

After the show was over and Lucy and Mark were all packed up and ready for the next event, they headed for the parking garage, where Lucy spotted Seth and Roman not too far ahead.

“Hey, I’ll see ya in a few days.” She called over her shoulder to her coworker.

She snuck up behind Seth, attacking him with a surprise piggyback ride, but her attempts were almost ruined when she realized that her friend was much taller than she was, and she ended up kind of clinging to his torso instead.

“What in the hell are you doing?” Seth asked, trying to shake the girl off of him.

“Piggyback ride!” She replied in a childish voice.

Roman laughed. “Pretty sure that’s not how you piggyback ride.”

“Here,” Seth said as he bent down a little bit so that she could properly situate herself on his back. “Is that better?”

She nodded, nestling her head in the crook of his neck. “I’m so tired.”

“Well you get to rest up because we have a few days until we have to be in Toronto.” Seth replied as he carried her through the parking deck with ease.

“Toronto!? As In Canada!?” She beamed with excitement. “I’ve never been out of the country before.” And then she remembered. “Oh wait, I can’t go with you guys.”

“Why?” Roman asked.

“She was arrested for possession and shoplifting.” Seth frowned. “And it was less than five years ago, and she’s still on parole. The only reason she can travel among states is because she is employed by a travelling company.”

They dropped the conversation as they approached the S.U.V. Dean was leaning against it, smoking a cigarette. “I see you’ve graduated from lapdog to personal chauffeur, congratulations.”

Lucy hopped down from Seth’s back and stood directly in front of Dean. He was even taller than Seth, and even sort of attractive in a lumberjack-esque kind of way. He looked down at her, amusement playing on his face.

“What is your problem with me?” She shrieked. “What did I do to you to make you hate me so bad?”

Dean rolled his eyes dramatically. “You’ve been on the road with us, what? One night? And it’s fuckin’ already ‘I love Lucy’ around here. You run around the arena trying to help people and make yourself seem so sweet and innocent and all Mother Theresa like, but I got news for you, Tuts, ain’t no body buyin’ it. Except Seth, poor dude’s wrapped around your finger, eh man?” He patted Seth on the belly with the back of his hand.

Seth’s gaze immediately dropped to the ground when Lucy glanced at him. “I don’t run around here acting like a fucking saint. I’m just trying to do my job and be nice to people, instead of, I don’t know, moping around in catering. I know what you think about me, Ambrose. And you’re one to talk. You have no fucking room to judge anyone.”

“At least I don’t need to depend on anyone in order to get places in life. I’ve never had to depend on anyone to get me anywhere. But you, you would probably be face down in some ditch right now with a needle sticking out of your arm if Seth hadn’t come picked you up from rehab. Tell me, Lucy, how bad do you want to shoot up right now? I bet you’re just itching for a bump.”

Before she could think twice, Lucy reached up and smacked him. She suppressed wincing at how badly her hand burned after, and did her best to shake it off. Dean clutched his face, which was plastered with an arrogant grin. “Man, that really did feel good.” She said as she looked up at Seth who only smiled at her with pride.

“Is it a bad time to ask who’s driving?” Roman interrupted.

“I vote that Dean does for being an asshole.” Lucy replied, both Roman and Seth nodded in agreement, and tossed Dean the keys.

Three hours later, Lucy was still wide awake in the back seat; replaying everything Dean had said to her earlier. He was right about everything, once again. Without Seth she probably would be right back to square one; fucked up on some dingy couch that belonged to a man that she didn’t know. Or worse. She could be dead or in jail. At least she’d be sober in jail. She did depend on Seth, but not for the reasons that he thinks. She depends on him because he keeps her sane. He keeps her clean.

She looked at the two-toned superstar who was sprawled out across the backseat, sleeping peacefully. Roman was asleep in the front seat, which left Dean; awake and smoking a cigarette, listening to some soft acoustic station.

“Can I tell you something and you not think that I’m trying to sucker you in or anything like that?” She asked softly. Dean glanced up momentarily through the rear-view mirror. Their eyes met briefly.

“Go for it.” He replied as he exhaled smoke.

“No offense to Roman or Seth, but I personally think you’re the most talented member of this group. Just from what I’ve seen so far. When Seth was giving me the update on you guys, I remember thinking to myself, ‘man, I could listen to this guy run a promo for hours’.” She could see a smile begin to form on his face. “It kind of sucks when you’re yelling at me, because a part of me wants you to keep yelling, and the other part of me wants to, well, smack you.”

“I get that a lot.” He replied.

“Sorry if that hurt, by the way.” She meant it. She was never a violent person, and that was the first time she had ever actually smacked someone across the face.

Dean laughed a little more loudly that time. “You’re cute.”

For a split second her face drained and a small lump formed in her throat.

“You really think that your little girl hands could hurt me? That’s fuckin’ adorable.”

She rolled her eyes, a small smile playing on her lips, which didn’t go unnoticed by Dean. She was half expecting an apology, and half knowing that she wasn’t going to get one. But she figured this civil conversation would suffice. They’d probably go back to fighting like cats and dogs as soon as he came back from Canada.

“Where are you staying again?” He asked.

“Buffalo, and then I’ll catch a flight to Illinois on Sunday morning..”

“Are you going to be okay?”

“Are you worried about me, Mr. Ambrose?”

“Well, for Seth’s sake.” He played easily.

“I’ll be fine.” She smiled.

A comfortable silence fell around them as they drove down the desolate New York highway. Lucy was sung to sleep by the soft sounds of the radio, and Seth’s steady breathing. Dean went to ask her another question, but noticed that she was fast asleep, using his best friend as a pillow.

“He’ll be okay.” Roman mumbled.

“Yeah, I know.” Dean replied, returning his focus to the road.