Underestimate Me

A tingly sensation down her spine pulled her from her vast slumber. She had been dozing in and out of consciousness for a while now. Not waking just enough to open her eyes. She was letting herself get lost in the sweet oblivion over and over again.

“I can see you finally rose,” the warm voice of Meredith reached her ears and she felt warm breath on her cheek. After blinking to focus Josselyn noticed herself to be sprawled across the bed, her face touching the cushions. Some parts of her covered by the white linnen, her bare back stroked by the blond goddess next to her.

The gasps she had made that night were still on her breath. Her lips still smothered by Meredith’s, who drank her in as if this night was all they would ever be granted. Flashes of the moonlit hours returned to her memory. Meredith’s hands had been impatient, such an urge and longing in her touch. She had held Meredith off for a longer time than usual, her mind not set to forget the happenings of days. Last night had been different. Her mind so clouded she had craved for release. Josselyn had shuddered from passion as her sister’s hands had explored the inches of her body. They had traveled untouched skin and send lightning bolts to light up her mind as in heavy storms. Her carresses had bolted through her like deer running from the electric fire in the sky.

Josselyn knew the way this was looked upon in her former life. It was a forbidden love, as they were forbidden women. It was the only love Josselyn knew to be true. The only she had ever known. Meredith had shown her true tenderness, true lust and true passion.

She looked upon her bedded sister. Meredith’s narrow hips were pressed against the strawfilled matrass, her round behind halfway covered by the sheets. As she drew her eyes higher she followed the line that drew her spine from the beginning of her bum to up between her shoulderblades. Meredith had raised herself to her elbows and rested her head in one hand, her other was tracing the lines on Josselyn’s back. Thrills shot down her spine and goosebumps appeared where Meredith’s finger left the skin.

“We do have duties to attend.” Meredith said, her fingers still stoking, a mesmerizing rhythm of moves across her back. Josselyn closed her eyes, focussing on the repetitive movement. She felt how Meredith leaned in, the straw matress shifting underneath her. Soft lips touched hers and she could taste the berries of the night before. The sweetness lingered and she took it all in.

She did not want to rise and put on her coat of responsibilities. She wanted to stay naked, now that Meredith once again had made her feel so comfortable to be vulnerable.

Even after two years, it was never easy. Josselyn had battled her memories again last night. Trying to convince her broken soul that the arms embracing her and the fingers exploring her body were those of Meredith. Flashes of those horrid nights had come before her, Meredith’s hands turning more calloused and broad. Her voice changing to malice, her face turning into his.

“I am a man with needs, Josselyn.” His voice spoke. “it may not show, but your lush hips do enchant me too.” His finger trailed down her stomach, rounding her navel and following the line that creased her hip.

“You lured Rowen into your web so easily, but you know I am different. I will not get stuck in your entanglement, I will snatch you from it and devour you.” He cocked his head. He was still fully dressed, while she hung there, still as naked as she had been grabbed from Rowen’s bed.

“They say the black widow eats the head of those she sleeps with” he continued his monologue “but it seems nature faulted this time. For only time will tell what will happen with you.”

His hands followed her inguen, traveling to the most private part of her body. She wanted to scream, but even if the gag had not prevented it, her voice was gone. She had screamed his name so many times. She had screamed it alongside his God’s name. She was sure now. She was sure this was not her God, for he was abandoning her this very moment. She was sure he was not her saviour, his man abandoning her as well. Her moonsblood had not yet dried, for it would flow again.

“Calm my sweet,” her sister had whispered with a voice thick with heat, “it’s just me, I will never hurt you. It is me touching you, not them.” Those words had driven the demons away and Josselyn had given herself to Meredith. To Meredith and to ecstatic oblivion.

~~~

Stepping out of the tent, dressed to cover her past, real life hit her as the heat that hung in the valley. A little breeze carried her hair to the side, but it was like a warm breath. Not much unlike Meredith’s on her cheek just moments ago. Josselyn had ripped herself from the bed, covering up last night with boiled leather and high boots. Meredith had stayed in the bed for a bit longer, watching her sister getting dressed. A few develish words had left her lips, trying to get her leader back in the bed. Though the second in command knew Josselyn needed to make an appearance outside of her tent. She knew the burdens Maa put upon her subject and Maa was strong in this valley.

Josselyn walked through the encampment, some sisters were breaking fast with fruits and baked potatoes. The smells were watering her mouth for Josselyn had not eaten yet. She was about to sit down with some of her sisters that were skinning a rabbit, when Laila rushed towards her.

“Would you please come?” Her face was full of concern and her words urgent. “It’s Rowen. His wounds look bad and they have gore pussing out of the holes. This is beyond my knowledge.” The way Laila described the wounds on Rowen’s shoulder and around his wrists, Josselyn feared fever would take her revenge with it if they did not act. As soon as the yellow substance appeared upon a wound that big, it would certainly be the last wound that he would ever wear.

Laila rushed before her as she followed the sister towards Rowen. He was slid down the pole, only his upper back touching it. Josselyn crouched next to him. His eyes were closed, and as she looked around his body she could see the hands bound on his back twitching. Rowen’s frown was deep set between his eyes and behind eyelids his eyes seemed to twist from side to side. He looked as truly haunted as she had wished him to be. Some sweat gleamed on the verge of his hair.

Her sister slowly reached for his shoulder. Tearing away his ripped clothes, pieces of its cloth remaining stuck to the festering wound. Rowen had not wanted any treatment, her sister told her.

He is stealing away her revenge himself, Josselyn thought. He was taking the pleasure out of his own death by putting the knife of fever to his own throat.

The intimacy she had just encountered in her tent had turned gruesome in the light of day. She had to keep him alive. If not, they would be running forever, for total war would be upon them. Her sisters blood would sate the ground and Maa would kill her failing vessel.

After nights like she had just spent. After nights filled with love, her motivation to survive was colossal. The thought of Meredith vanishing in time was one she could not bare.

“To save us, I need to save my worst enemy,” She whispered to herself. Her spoken words were right. His faith was so intertwined with theirs, she had only but one option; to keep this demon alive. Keeping him alive until she knew how to rid of him without endangering the ones she loved.

And to keep him alive she was about to tred dangerous paths.