Faithfulness at Its Finest

*Austin's POV*

Days like these were my favorite, it was raining and I didn't have to work today so that meant I could sit in my window sill, watch the rain run down the window and see all the beautiful little drops hitting the concrete. I wish I could join them but I was to caught up in my own thoughts. Like what college I'm going to next year or what I wanna do in the future. Or what am I going to eat later today but mostly what was flooding my mind was that face. The face of Alan. He was beyond stunning. The boy was perfection at its finest.

I had been sending him anon messages for the last couple of days seeing as I was to scared to have him know who I was yet. And let me tell you I don't know how he did it but he got even more perfect. Not only does he have the looks that could win anyone over but he is beyond sweet. Alan was a Class A charmer, I don't know if he knew he was killing me inside with his cuteness but he was sure doing a damn good job of it.

I could obsess over him all day which I have been doing for the last week. No one knew I was gay though, I have a girlfriend named Krystyn and she's probably the nicest person you'll ever meet but I just don't feel anything towards her anymore. When we first started dating 3 years ago I was madly in love with her but the feeling has faded. I know I should break up with her but I can't hurt her like that. She doesn't deserve to be broken up with. So I'm stuck here between a rock and a hard place do I end things with Krystyn and confess my love for men or do I stay with her in hopes that this is just a phase thing. This is something that's haunted my mind for months.

I sighed, deciding it was time to eat something. I headed to my kitchen grabbing a package of top ramen before heating up some water in a pot. I had lived alone for awhile now my dad kicked me out last April. He said I was nothing but a pest and he never wanted to see me again. He became an alcoholic after my mom died and has grown to hate the world and everything in it including me. He wasn't always like this when my mom was alive we were a close knit family that was almost flawless. We never fought never had any problems everything was great.

That was until my mom was diagnosed with Marfan Syndrome and was pretty much laid in her death bed just after the diagnosis. It was a hard time for everyone especially my dad. He was losing his world the person he loved the most. She died a couple weeks later and not much after I found out I also had Marfan syndrome. As if it wasn't already bad enough that my mom died now I'm cursed with this shit. It was awful my life was hitting an all time low. My dad quit his job and spent all the money we had left on alcohol so that's when I got a job working at the Vans a couple streets away from our house. I wasn't making a whole lot but it was just barely enough to get us by. This went on for several months before I got kicked out and well know I'm here living alone. Well not completely alone I share the quaint two bedroom apartment with my life long best friend Tino. We've been friends since kindergarten when he offered me some goldfish on the playground.

"Hey Austin" speaking of the devil look who the cat just dragged in.

"Hey Tino where you been"

"I stayed the night at Kenadee's last night" Kenadee was his girlfriend they've been together since 7th grade and were probably going to be together until the end of time.

"Oh, sweet you want some top ramen"

"Nah I just had some Chinese thanks though"

"Ok" I poured my noodles into a bowl and joined Tino on the couch.

"So how are things with you and Alan"

I told Tino about my crush on Alan because he's the only person I trust with a secret like this and he knew about the whole Krystyn/I'm really gay situation. He wasn't judgmental at all which I was beyond thankful for because coming out to him was probably one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.

"Pretty good but he hasn't answered my latest message" I was a bit worried because usually he's so quick with answering and I know I'm probably overreacting and everything is ok but still I have the nervousness.

"He's probably busy remember he does have a life to Aus"

"Yea you're right it's nothing" I twirled more noodles onto my fork trying to convince myself that it was nothing and everything was fine but I knew in My gut something was wrong.

"So I hear that Krystyn is hosting the Halloween party tonight are you gonna go"

I slurped some noodles before responding. "Well I'll feel bad if I don't go but you know how I feel about parties"

"Yea I know but Kenadee told me she was going to ask you if you wanted to dress up as Mickey and Minnie this year"

I almost spit out my top ramen. "Holy shit yes my favorite two people in the world, fuck the party itself I just wanna have an excuse to dress up as Mickey Mouse"

Tino pulled out his phone "Hahaha, ok I'll tell Krystyn you're in"

"Is it BYOB"

"Um yea I think"

"Ok I'll bring some for the both of us"

"You better go get you're costume from Krystyn's the party starts in two hours"

"Shit what do I wear"

"Uh I would just wear your Mickey shirt and some black jeans I'm sure she has some kinda other stuff for you to wear"

"Thanks Tino I don't know what I'd do without you"

I got up throwing my bowl in the sink and headed to my room. I tore apart my room searching for that dammed mickey shirt I swear I just wore it last week where the fuck was it. After about 15 minutes of frantic searching I finally found in in the corner under my bed. What the hell was it doing there I could've sworn I put it in my dirty clothes pile but I guess not. I quickly changed almost falling into the door while trying to out my mile long legs into my black skinny jeans which fit me like regular jeans because my legs were so skinny.

I pulled out my phone hopefully checking to see if I got a response from Alan. Still nothing, I let out a long sigh before slipping on my vans. Next to the bathroom to brush my teeth and fix my hair. Once I was all set I returned to the kitchen to grab a bottle of vodka we had for you know for emergencies.

"Hey Tino you ready yet?" I knew we would have to get there early to help set up or else we would be getting the cold shoulder from our girlfriends.

"Yea just give me a second"

About a minute layer Tino met me in the living room dressed as a motorcycle junkie. I snickered "bro what are you wearing"

"Kenadee decided that this year I should go as a motorcycle dude and she's gonna dress up like a pinup girl"

"Wow she will for sure be the better looking half of this"

"Are you saying I don't look sexy, I'm truly hurt Austin" we both laughed at times ridiculous comment.

"No of course you look sexy you always looks sexy"

"I know"

"Come on we should head out" we locked up the apartment and jumped into Tino's beat up old truck. We arrived at Krystyn's house not much later.

The house was covered will all kinds of Halloween decorations and we could already hear the music blasting from inside the house. My anxiety started to set in and the party hasn't even started yet. Parties we're never my cup of tea I didn't hate them but I didn't exactly enjoy them either. We approached the house letting ourselves knowing it was unlocked and saw a frantic Krystyn and Kenadee scurrying around trying to get everything ready.

"Hey we're here" Tino announced.

"Oh hey guys, just set down the alcohol on the counter and would you mind helping me set up the sound system I have it all hooked up I just need you to put the speakers outside because I couldn't earlier due to the rain" Krystyn quickly asked while trying to set up the snack table. "Oh and Austin I got you some Mickey ears they're in my room"

"Ok thanks I'll grab them them go set up the speakers" I kissed her cheek them retrieved my "costume"

Afterwards we headed outside to set it up and shortly after people began arriving. First just a few but within minutes it was a full fledged party there must've been 150 people here some of them already drunk others trying to hit in girls dressed in slutty Halloween costumes. A classic high school party everyone here was just trying to get drunk and laid, how classy. I poured myself some Whiskey and began drinking I knew the only way I was going to get through this party was with alcohol. After a couple shots of whiskey I picked out some random beers and began drinking good times here we come.

Three hours later I was wasted beyond belief I was dancing with some girl dressed up as a devil and was singing along to whatever shit song was playing over the speaker. She was grinding all over me probably trying to get lucky but for one I had a girlfriend and two I as gay so she didn't have a chance. Sorry sweetheart. I was actually having a good time though this hasn't happened in awhile. I gave about zero fucks right now I just wanted to dance and have fun. Thank you alcohol I don't know what would I do without you.

"Hey will you go get me a Jell-O shot" the short devil clad girl I'm front of me semi yelled into my ear so she could be heard over the loud music.

"Yea sure I'll be right back" I stumbled over to the counter searching for a Jell-O shot when I heard a familiar voice. Please don't be who I think this is please please please. I turned around a sure enough it's who I thought, it was Justyn. We had a fling last summer when me and Krystyn took break for the summer. Justyn and I were mostly just using each other for sex which was fine with me at the time but now not so much.

"Why hello there Austin" he smirked. He was a frat boy from the local college so all he ever thought about was sex. I knew those were his intentions.

"H-hi Justyn" he was now face to face with me.

"I saw your cute little ass head over here and thought I would talk to you"

"Justyn you know I have a girlfriend what you and I had was just sex"

He put his hand on the wall next to me trapping me. I swallowed hard "Oh Austin you and I both know you don't like Krystyn" the strong smell of booze was escaping from his mouth and almost made me sick.

"What do you want from me"

"Oh nothing, just wanted to chat with you a bit"

I could tell he was lying through his teeth. Where's Tino when you need him. "Well uh what do you wanna chat about"

"Oh did I say chat I meant this" he leaned down and kissed me. I immediately panicked if anyone sees this I'm dead my reputation is over I tried to push him off me but I strength is nothing on his he pretty much lifted weights professionally. I was stuck and very uncomfortable I was almost praying someone would see this and try to pry him off me.

"Austin how could you" that voice I knew it was Krystyn's. Justyn stopped trying to kiss me and looked her dead in the eye.

"Ohhhhh is this your little girlfriend Austin, oh she's so cute no wonder you are with her to bad you feel nothing towards her because you are a flaming homo" as if it wasn't already bad enough he was here he then tried to kiss me and now he's exposing my secret TO MY GIRLFRIEND OF ALL PEOPLE! I was dead my life is over everyone will know now that Austin Robert Carlile is gay so long life.

I looked at Krystyn and saw her eyes fill with tears threating to spill over. "Krystyn I I can explain" I tried to walk over to soothe her but she pushed me away.

"No no need to it's over Austin" she ran away to her room and my heart dropped. I was a horrible person I knew it in my bones. How could I hurt such a sweet flawless girl she didn't deserve this. What's wrong with me she'll never forgive me. I have never felt worse in my life I truly hurt her.

"Well now that she's gone we can get back to what we were doing" I was raving mad at Justyn he just made my girlfriend break up with me and all he's interested in is kissing me.

"Get the fuck off me you disgusting dog you make me sick, I never wanna see you again I fucking hate you" fortunately no one really saw what had just happened but tht didn't change the fact that I still felt shitty. I ran outside trying to escape Justyn for good. I began my trek home replaying everything that jut happened over I'm my mind. I would never be able to forgive myself for this.