Sequel: I Miss You Too ›
Status: 1/1
Best Friends
1
"Hey Alex?"
Alex opened his eyes in the dark hotel room and looked in the direction of Jack's voice, "yeah, babe?"
"Can I sleep in your bed?"
"Course you can," he mumbled, moving over and holding the blankets and sheets up until he felt Jack climb in next to him. He forced himself to keep his eyes open for a little while longer, waiting for his friend to say something.
"I miss Zack."
Alex held back a sigh but only just barely.
"He never hangs out with us anymore." There was a brief silence filled with Jack shifting around too much to the point Alex moved away and let Jack lay by himself on one side of the bed. That of course earned him a whine and then Jack was right next to him again, clinging almost too tight, putting off almost too much body heat but Alex was a good best friend so he couldn't do anything but accept it. "I just miss him, we used to be best friends and now we don't even talk."
There wasn't that much Alex felt like he could say for a couple reasons, the first being, this was the tenth time(he started keeping track after the second time) in four days that they'd had this talk, the second being, Jack was pretty much telling the truth.
This was only their second tour on a bus instead of in their old cramped van. Now that Zack had space, he took full advantage of it. He was a quiet kid, that's just how it had always been, but when you're forced to be in a van with five to ten other guys there's not a lot of time to yourself. That all changed when they got the bus they all had their own bunk now, their own space and for obvious reasons Zack liked that.
Most days they wouldn't even see him until soundcheck and then again when they were on stage. It wasn't personal, Alex and Rian didn't mind but Jack most certainly did. He took it harder than Alex ever would have thought he would, he didn't even know Jack and Zack were that close. He was pretty sure Zack didn't know either because that kid was too nice to ever purposely hurt anyone.
"He's not doing it on purpose Jack, he just likes being alone," Alex tried to explain once again. "If you want to spend more time with him, you have to say something, he can't just read your mind."
"But he could want to hang out with me," Jack whined, starting to shift around again. "I'm fun to hang out with, lots of people like me." Jack paused for a second and flopped onto his back. "Zack used to like me."
"He still likes you, I like you, everyone likes you but if you keep moving I'm gonna kick you out of my bed," Alex threatened after either an elbow or a knee jabbed him in the side.
"Fine just, just move or something." Jack's voice cracked just slightly and Alex frowned in the dark.
"Jack, are you crying?"
"I just really thought he liked me."
"Oh, Jack, I'm so sorry," he apologized immediately because now it made sense. Jack kept crying as Alex pulled him into a hug and long after until eventually there were no tears left and he fell asleep.
Things got progressively worse after that but Alex tried his best to keep Jack all held together, not let him fall apart. The result was if Zack was still spending all day by himself Alex wouldn't even know because he spent all day in his own bunk listening to Jack cry or snore, a couple of times both. If he would have known the bus would cause this much of a problem he would have gladly stayed in a van. He learned a little more about how Jack felt and he found himself feeling worse and worse for both boys everyday because he knew Zack hadn't meant to but that kid had crushed Jack more than Alex even thought was possible.
From all his talks with Jack he was able to surmise that Zack and Jack were a lot closer than he'd initially thought. The younger two had spent a lot of time sitting together when they had the van because Jack was forbidden from ever driving and Zack liked to hide out in the very back row. It was a sad story, it hurt just to listen to so he could only imagine how it felt to live and he got it completely now. Zack and Jack used to tell each other everything and Zack didn't tell a lot of people a lot of things so it made Jack feel special and now they hardly talked at all. They used to sleep almost on top of each other in the van days and now Zack never even stood next to him, yeah, Alex could definitely see how that would hurt. He couldn't change it but he could understand it.
He tried to convince Jack to say something but that, like everything else, just resulted in more crying and he could understand the fear and the hesitation so he didn't push too much. He understood that Jack felt like he only barely had Zack now and he could see why the younger didn't want to risk losing him completely. That's not to say he supported Jack spending all his free time crying over someone that was usually less than three feet away but he understood.
Jack wasn't very keen on spending time around Zack anymore, he said it hurt too much, so when they all decided to go to Denny's on a rainy off day Alex wasn't surprised when Jack didn't want to go. He checked a few times to make sure the guitarist would be okay by himself before he left and joined the rest of the guys at the end of the hall.
"Hey, Alex." He heard a quieter voice say and turned to find a slightly uncomfortable Zack standing next to him.
"Hey Zack, you feeling alright?"
"Yeah, where's Jack?" Zack asked, looking around the group and then back to Alex maybe a little anxious, maybe just the same as usual. It had been too long since Alex spent any time with him, he'd sort of forgot what normal was for his friend. "He hasn't really been himself lately, is he okay?"
"Yeah," Alex sighed, wanting to say so much more but knowing Jack didn't want him to. "He's just going through some stuff right now."
"Oh."
Alex could almost read Zack's mind, could almost hear him wondering why Jack hadn't told him anything. He knew Zack was wondering why they weren't close anymore just like Jack. It took everything in him to keep from telling Zack everything because he knew he could trust Zack with that information, he knew regardless of whether or not Zack felt the same as Jack he'd work tirelessly to make the younger feel better. He was a good guy, Alex knew that, but it wasn't his choice to make and he knew that too.
"But he's gonna bounce back, you know how Jack is," he promised. "Come on, if we don't hurry these assholes will eat without us."
Zack looked back in the direction of their rooms for a second but then nodded and they ran into the hard falling rain together. They stopped for less than a second to check for traffic but by the time they got inside the entry of the restaurant they were almost drenched. The inside was crowded and Zack looked a little apprehensive so Alex suggested they wait in the outside lobby for a while.
"So what sort of stuff is Jack going through?" Zack asked, shoving his hands in his hoodie pocket and staring at the tiled floor.
"Just stuff, I don't really know," Alex tried to lie but Zack called him on it with a pointed look. "I'm sort of sworn to secrecy but like I said I wouldn't worry too much, he's gonna bounce back like he always does."
"Right." An awkward silence filled the air, both boys glancing at their phones or clearing their throats uncomfortably for a few seconds. "These things are rigged," Zack finally said, pointing at the claw machine in the corner of the small room. "I lost so much money to them when I was little."
"Yeah, curse of the claw man," Alex laughed still uncomfortable. "It's pretty impressive when you win though."
Zack glanced up at that, eyes going wide for a second and then he was shoving his hand in every pocket he had before looking at Alex. "Do you have any coins?"
"Maybe." Alex checked his pockets and then pulled his wallet out of his back pocket finding a couple ones and handing one over.
Zack put it in the machine quickly and proceeded to operate the crane machine like he was a surgeon. His tongue poked out of the side of his mouth, his hand moving gently, making sure not to move the crane too much. Time ran out before he could get a good enough position though and the claw grasped at nothing before returning to it's original spot. He had one more try, his tongue poked out the side of his mouth again, his brows drew together, he focused like he was taking apart a bomb.
"How's it look from the side?" He asked and Alex pressed his face to the side of the glass like he used to do when he was five. He was just as into it as Zack, he wasn't sure why, but he was. He wanted the teddy bear Zack was trying for with everything in him.
He gave simple instructions left, right, back, too far, go forward, helping his friend get the crane in the exact right position. They held their breath as they watched the claw fall and he swore he heard Zack squeal the tiniest bit when it latched onto the teddy bear they'd been trying for. Their stuffed animal was deposited in the prize box and Zack pulled it out and held it in front of him like a new born baby, smiling ear to ear. It was a cute bear, Alex could admit that, but it wasn't that great just an average sized teddy bear in an I heart Pennsylvania shirt but that didn't seem to be the case for Zack.
"Order pancakes and eggs for me."
"Zack, you're gonna get soaked don't go back out there." But Zack was already running across the street his teddy safe and dry under his shirt.
Zack quickly realized he had no idea which room was Jack's when he got back inside the hotel and he was dripping wet but neither fact detered him. He knew what group of rooms belonged to them and he just knocked on each door until finally one of them was opened.
"Zack," Jack frowned when he opened the door. He looked like he'd been crying, Zack thought, and he felt a little worse. "What are you doing?"
"I, uh, can I come in?" He hadn't really thought out what he wanted to say so he stalled for time, walking in and sitting on the unused bed. A small part of him wondered why Jack and Alex were sharing a bed but he shook it off in favor of figuring out what to say.
"What's under your shirt?" Jack asked, sitting down opposite Zack. His voice was all quiet and un-Jack like Zack thought before pulling out the bear.
"Alex told me you weren't feeling good and you've sort of been avoiding me lately so I uh, I got you this." Zack handed over the stuffed bear and continued speaking, not nearly as uncomfortable as he thought he'd be. "It can be there for you since you don't really want me around right now but it could never love you as much as I do. You're my best friend Jack, I know you're going through something but I hope you come find me when it's over. I miss talking with you." Jack stared over at him but Zack couldn't read his expression. "I better get back before my food gets cold," he said, feeling awkward again after his big speech. "I really hope you feel better."
********
Alex felt his phone buzz in his pocket just as he was waving Zack over to their table and pulled it out, smiling before he even read the message. Something about the blush on his younger friend's wet face told him things had gone well.
Jack-O 10:34pm
Zack got me a teddy bear! He said he loves me!!
He got me a fucking teddy bear!!!!!
Alex shoved his phone back in his pocket and handed Zack his plate with a smile, "I think Jack feels better now."
It was tough for him to determine who was happier in that moment because all three boys were wearing matching grins. Later on when he got back to his room and Jack told him the same story thirty times in a row, still grinning each time, it was much easier.
Alex opened his eyes in the dark hotel room and looked in the direction of Jack's voice, "yeah, babe?"
"Can I sleep in your bed?"
"Course you can," he mumbled, moving over and holding the blankets and sheets up until he felt Jack climb in next to him. He forced himself to keep his eyes open for a little while longer, waiting for his friend to say something.
"I miss Zack."
Alex held back a sigh but only just barely.
"He never hangs out with us anymore." There was a brief silence filled with Jack shifting around too much to the point Alex moved away and let Jack lay by himself on one side of the bed. That of course earned him a whine and then Jack was right next to him again, clinging almost too tight, putting off almost too much body heat but Alex was a good best friend so he couldn't do anything but accept it. "I just miss him, we used to be best friends and now we don't even talk."
There wasn't that much Alex felt like he could say for a couple reasons, the first being, this was the tenth time(he started keeping track after the second time) in four days that they'd had this talk, the second being, Jack was pretty much telling the truth.
This was only their second tour on a bus instead of in their old cramped van. Now that Zack had space, he took full advantage of it. He was a quiet kid, that's just how it had always been, but when you're forced to be in a van with five to ten other guys there's not a lot of time to yourself. That all changed when they got the bus they all had their own bunk now, their own space and for obvious reasons Zack liked that.
Most days they wouldn't even see him until soundcheck and then again when they were on stage. It wasn't personal, Alex and Rian didn't mind but Jack most certainly did. He took it harder than Alex ever would have thought he would, he didn't even know Jack and Zack were that close. He was pretty sure Zack didn't know either because that kid was too nice to ever purposely hurt anyone.
"He's not doing it on purpose Jack, he just likes being alone," Alex tried to explain once again. "If you want to spend more time with him, you have to say something, he can't just read your mind."
"But he could want to hang out with me," Jack whined, starting to shift around again. "I'm fun to hang out with, lots of people like me." Jack paused for a second and flopped onto his back. "Zack used to like me."
"He still likes you, I like you, everyone likes you but if you keep moving I'm gonna kick you out of my bed," Alex threatened after either an elbow or a knee jabbed him in the side.
"Fine just, just move or something." Jack's voice cracked just slightly and Alex frowned in the dark.
"Jack, are you crying?"
"I just really thought he liked me."
"Oh, Jack, I'm so sorry," he apologized immediately because now it made sense. Jack kept crying as Alex pulled him into a hug and long after until eventually there were no tears left and he fell asleep.
Things got progressively worse after that but Alex tried his best to keep Jack all held together, not let him fall apart. The result was if Zack was still spending all day by himself Alex wouldn't even know because he spent all day in his own bunk listening to Jack cry or snore, a couple of times both. If he would have known the bus would cause this much of a problem he would have gladly stayed in a van. He learned a little more about how Jack felt and he found himself feeling worse and worse for both boys everyday because he knew Zack hadn't meant to but that kid had crushed Jack more than Alex even thought was possible.
From all his talks with Jack he was able to surmise that Zack and Jack were a lot closer than he'd initially thought. The younger two had spent a lot of time sitting together when they had the van because Jack was forbidden from ever driving and Zack liked to hide out in the very back row. It was a sad story, it hurt just to listen to so he could only imagine how it felt to live and he got it completely now. Zack and Jack used to tell each other everything and Zack didn't tell a lot of people a lot of things so it made Jack feel special and now they hardly talked at all. They used to sleep almost on top of each other in the van days and now Zack never even stood next to him, yeah, Alex could definitely see how that would hurt. He couldn't change it but he could understand it.
He tried to convince Jack to say something but that, like everything else, just resulted in more crying and he could understand the fear and the hesitation so he didn't push too much. He understood that Jack felt like he only barely had Zack now and he could see why the younger didn't want to risk losing him completely. That's not to say he supported Jack spending all his free time crying over someone that was usually less than three feet away but he understood.
Jack wasn't very keen on spending time around Zack anymore, he said it hurt too much, so when they all decided to go to Denny's on a rainy off day Alex wasn't surprised when Jack didn't want to go. He checked a few times to make sure the guitarist would be okay by himself before he left and joined the rest of the guys at the end of the hall.
"Hey, Alex." He heard a quieter voice say and turned to find a slightly uncomfortable Zack standing next to him.
"Hey Zack, you feeling alright?"
"Yeah, where's Jack?" Zack asked, looking around the group and then back to Alex maybe a little anxious, maybe just the same as usual. It had been too long since Alex spent any time with him, he'd sort of forgot what normal was for his friend. "He hasn't really been himself lately, is he okay?"
"Yeah," Alex sighed, wanting to say so much more but knowing Jack didn't want him to. "He's just going through some stuff right now."
"Oh."
Alex could almost read Zack's mind, could almost hear him wondering why Jack hadn't told him anything. He knew Zack was wondering why they weren't close anymore just like Jack. It took everything in him to keep from telling Zack everything because he knew he could trust Zack with that information, he knew regardless of whether or not Zack felt the same as Jack he'd work tirelessly to make the younger feel better. He was a good guy, Alex knew that, but it wasn't his choice to make and he knew that too.
"But he's gonna bounce back, you know how Jack is," he promised. "Come on, if we don't hurry these assholes will eat without us."
Zack looked back in the direction of their rooms for a second but then nodded and they ran into the hard falling rain together. They stopped for less than a second to check for traffic but by the time they got inside the entry of the restaurant they were almost drenched. The inside was crowded and Zack looked a little apprehensive so Alex suggested they wait in the outside lobby for a while.
"So what sort of stuff is Jack going through?" Zack asked, shoving his hands in his hoodie pocket and staring at the tiled floor.
"Just stuff, I don't really know," Alex tried to lie but Zack called him on it with a pointed look. "I'm sort of sworn to secrecy but like I said I wouldn't worry too much, he's gonna bounce back like he always does."
"Right." An awkward silence filled the air, both boys glancing at their phones or clearing their throats uncomfortably for a few seconds. "These things are rigged," Zack finally said, pointing at the claw machine in the corner of the small room. "I lost so much money to them when I was little."
"Yeah, curse of the claw man," Alex laughed still uncomfortable. "It's pretty impressive when you win though."
Zack glanced up at that, eyes going wide for a second and then he was shoving his hand in every pocket he had before looking at Alex. "Do you have any coins?"
"Maybe." Alex checked his pockets and then pulled his wallet out of his back pocket finding a couple ones and handing one over.
Zack put it in the machine quickly and proceeded to operate the crane machine like he was a surgeon. His tongue poked out of the side of his mouth, his hand moving gently, making sure not to move the crane too much. Time ran out before he could get a good enough position though and the claw grasped at nothing before returning to it's original spot. He had one more try, his tongue poked out the side of his mouth again, his brows drew together, he focused like he was taking apart a bomb.
"How's it look from the side?" He asked and Alex pressed his face to the side of the glass like he used to do when he was five. He was just as into it as Zack, he wasn't sure why, but he was. He wanted the teddy bear Zack was trying for with everything in him.
He gave simple instructions left, right, back, too far, go forward, helping his friend get the crane in the exact right position. They held their breath as they watched the claw fall and he swore he heard Zack squeal the tiniest bit when it latched onto the teddy bear they'd been trying for. Their stuffed animal was deposited in the prize box and Zack pulled it out and held it in front of him like a new born baby, smiling ear to ear. It was a cute bear, Alex could admit that, but it wasn't that great just an average sized teddy bear in an I heart Pennsylvania shirt but that didn't seem to be the case for Zack.
"Order pancakes and eggs for me."
"Zack, you're gonna get soaked don't go back out there." But Zack was already running across the street his teddy safe and dry under his shirt.
Zack quickly realized he had no idea which room was Jack's when he got back inside the hotel and he was dripping wet but neither fact detered him. He knew what group of rooms belonged to them and he just knocked on each door until finally one of them was opened.
"Zack," Jack frowned when he opened the door. He looked like he'd been crying, Zack thought, and he felt a little worse. "What are you doing?"
"I, uh, can I come in?" He hadn't really thought out what he wanted to say so he stalled for time, walking in and sitting on the unused bed. A small part of him wondered why Jack and Alex were sharing a bed but he shook it off in favor of figuring out what to say.
"What's under your shirt?" Jack asked, sitting down opposite Zack. His voice was all quiet and un-Jack like Zack thought before pulling out the bear.
"Alex told me you weren't feeling good and you've sort of been avoiding me lately so I uh, I got you this." Zack handed over the stuffed bear and continued speaking, not nearly as uncomfortable as he thought he'd be. "It can be there for you since you don't really want me around right now but it could never love you as much as I do. You're my best friend Jack, I know you're going through something but I hope you come find me when it's over. I miss talking with you." Jack stared over at him but Zack couldn't read his expression. "I better get back before my food gets cold," he said, feeling awkward again after his big speech. "I really hope you feel better."
********
Alex felt his phone buzz in his pocket just as he was waving Zack over to their table and pulled it out, smiling before he even read the message. Something about the blush on his younger friend's wet face told him things had gone well.
Jack-O 10:34pm
Zack got me a teddy bear! He said he loves me!!
He got me a fucking teddy bear!!!!!
Alex shoved his phone back in his pocket and handed Zack his plate with a smile, "I think Jack feels better now."
It was tough for him to determine who was happier in that moment because all three boys were wearing matching grins. Later on when he got back to his room and Jack told him the same story thirty times in a row, still grinning each time, it was much easier.