The Beach

Chapter 5 - Trust Me

“Alex.”

His name escapes my lips in a cracking voice. Alex breaks away from Tay, looking shocked, and takes a step toward me. “Jack! This isn’t what it looks like, I swear!”

I laugh bitterly to cover up the hurt. “That’s what they all say.” Then, without another word, I spin around and rush back inside.

"Jack!" Alex’s voice chases me, and I glance over my shoulder to see him behind me. "Jack, just let me explain—I didn’t want that!”

"Sure you didn’t." I make a break for the elevator, which opens for me immediately. I hop inside and press the button that leads to my floor.

"Jack, please," Alex says as he reaches me, but the doors close before he can jump in.

I take a deep breath and close my eyes. I should’ve known better than to think this would all work out.

When I get back to the room, Zack looks up from where he’s lying in bed, still half-asleep. “I thought you were supposed to meet up with Alex.”

"I was." I go into the bathroom and shut the door before sitting down against it. The scene keeps replaying over and over in my mind, of Alex’s lips on Tay’s. I’ve only known him for a few days, but it still hurts.

God, I can’t believe how stupid I was. How could I think that something like this would go well? How could I think it’d be so easy?

A couple tears slip out of my eyes. What the hell? How did I get so attached? How did this whole thing start to really matter to me? How did he start to really matter to me?

"Fuck," I mutter, wiping the tears away. I can’t stop thinking about the way he’s treated me. Up until now, he acted like I was so wonderful and brilliant. He acted like he really cared about me. But that’s the key word: acted.

And why the hell do I even care about him? He was supposed to be just a summer fling. That’s all this was supposed to be. But it went in the wrong direction—I knew that ever since the party on Monday. I knew I was falling for him, and falling fast. But did I stop it? No. I didn’t even try.

And now this happened, and it’s all my fault.

Someone knocks on the bathroom door. “Jack?” It’s Zack.

I wipe away any leftover tears before standing up and opening the door. “Yeah?”

Zack looks me over. “What happened with you and Alex?” he asks knowingly.

I sigh and step out of the bathroom, sitting down on my bed. “I found him kissing this girl named Tay.”

Zack’s eyes widen. “Are you serious?” When I nod, he sits down next to me. “Oh, dude, I’m so sorry. Really. That’s…” He shakes his head and puts his arm around me. “You deserve better than that.”

I look up at him, suddenly noting the affection in his eyes. Zack is my best friend; has been for years. I know he cares about me.

What if…

Unexpectedly, I find myself thinking about kissing him, about losing myself and forgetting everything in the sweetness of his lips. But that idea doesn’t have a chance to become reality, even if I really wanted it to, because then my phone rings in my pocket.

Zack shifts away slightly as I pull it out and answer the call. “Hello?” I say.

"Jack!" It’s Rian. "Come down here. Alex wants to talk to you."

I almost hang up on him right then and there. “I don’t want anything to do with him.”

"Jack, please, just give him a chance to explain."

I snort. “If he’s so desperate, why isn’t he calling me himself?”

"Because he knew you’d hang up as soon as you heard his voice, or even saw his number pop up. Please. He’s waiting down at the beach."

I hang up and turn to Zack. “Don’t do it,” he says protectively. “He’ll…I don’t know. Just don’t go back to him.”

But the truth is, I want him to explain. I want to know that there’s a good reason for what I saw. I want to know that Alex hasn’t been acting around me.

I stand up. “I’m going back,” I tell Zack, suddenly realizing that kissing him is not what I want—I just want a distraction, and that’s not right, and I’m not going to use him like that. “At the very least, he owes me an explanation.”

I make my way back out to the boardwalk. Rian is standing close to where Alex and Tay were, and when he sees me, he sighs in relief.

"Jack!" he calls, pointing down to the coast. "He’s sitting down where we usually go to hang out."

I nod without saying anything. Then I walk down to the beach, slowing my pace when I see Alex’s silhouette in front of the rising sun. He’s sitting on a beach towel with his knees pulled up to his chest and his arms wrapped around them, and the breeze softly blows his hair as he stares out into the ocean.

For a second, I want to sneak up behind him and surprise him with a kiss, but that’s in the split second that I completely forget about what just happened. I sigh and sit down next to him, and he turns to me with what looks like hope written all over his face.

"Jack," he says, quickly composing himself. "I—I didn’t think you’d come."

"Yeah, well, I did," I say, jumping straight to the point. "Alex, I just want to know why. Tell me why."

Alex sighs, too. “Tay’s a girl from my school. We’ve known each other for years, but we didn’t talk much. While I was here, I noticed that she was starting to act a bit weird around me—as you’ve seen—but I swear I’m being completely honest when I say I had no idea why until now. We were just friends. I didn’t…” He shakes his head. “I guess she had a crush on me. I’m not lying when I say that she did want that kiss. But I didn’t, Jack. I never did.”

I narrow my eyes, feeling myself relax slightly at his words. “So she just…kissed you?”

Alex nods. “I don’t know if you noticed, but I wasn’t moving. I was in shock, way caught off-guard. She’d been kind of shy for a while, but then she decided to just go for it. And you happened to catch that.”

I think back to what I saw, to the shocked expression on Alex’s face as he pulled away from Tay. He really didn’t look that into it—Tay, on the other hand, seemed to be giving it her all.

"Jack, I really like you," Alex says. "I do. I mean it. And if you’ll let me, I’ll show you that I mean it. I’m not gonna be that guy, that cheater. I don’t care how long I’ve known you. I’ll never do it. I know what it feels like—believe me, I know."

That reminds me of the conversation I overheard between him and Rian, when Rian mentioned something that happened last year. It sounded like a summer love gone wrong.

In that moment, I get the feeling that he’s telling the truth. I trust him. Maybe some would say that it’s a dumb move, but I do.

I lean forward and kiss him softly. Pulling away, I say, “It’s okay. I believe you.” I smile. “Dick.”

Alex’s face lights up. “Asshole,” he replies, laughing his familiar laugh. He sounds relaxed, but I can see it in his face—he was worried. He was afraid…of losing me.

"Hey!"

A girl’s voice rings out from behind us, and Alex and I both shift our bodies around to see Tay sauntering toward us like she’s the queen of the universe. “Alex,” she says. “You ran away from me earlier.”

"Uh, yeah," Alex says. "I was chasing after my boyfriend."

Tay glances at me scornfully. “I don’t see any boyfriend.”

Alex glares at her. “He’s right here. And—”

Before he can even finish his sentence, Tay leans down and kisses him, quickly pulling back before he has a chance to push her away. Then, without another word, she smirks and spins on her heel, walking back the way she came.

Alex narrows his eyes, seeming stunned. After a few seconds of confused, dumbstruck silence, he calls after her, “You know, I really don’t appreciate you doing that!”

"You will eventually," she calls back, flipping her hair.

Alex turns to me. “I swear,” he says, “I don’t like her that way—”

"I know," I say. I can see it now—he really wasn’t lying. But Tay seems determined to have him, and I don’t appreciate that, either.