Don't Forget

“Ok,” Mia said.

“Ok,” Connor said, “Eyes front.”

He wasn't blinking. Mia didn't want to look away. Connor sighed rolling his eyes. He took her shoulders and turned her to face the mirror again. He sat back on the toilet leaving her with herself.

“How do you feel?”

“Honestly?”

“Always.”

“Shitty.” Mia said.

“You should,” Connor said, “You said some pretty shitty things to her.” Mia looked to him, “Eyes forward.” Mia sighed and looked at her reflection again, “That’s OK though that was the victim talking, not Mia Price.”

“What am I supposed to say?” Mia said.

“Let’s start from top.” Connor said. He came up behind her and ran his hands down her shoulders to her hands. Mia shivered, “Close your eyes.” He said in a low voice. Mia obeyed. He spread her fingers with his and then stuck them into either side of her head by her ears, “What do you feel?”

“Soft...wet from my shower this morning.”

He took an intake an intake of breath at the crown of her head and Mia shivered again. He pulled Mia’s fingers from her head and closed her fingers together again before putting them just before her nose.

“What do you smell?”

“My mango citrus shampoo.” Mia laughed a little. This was a bit ridiculous.

“Open your eyes.” Connor said. She looked up at his reflection's unblinking eyes. Her heart started trying to escape her chest, “I've dated girls who put all kinds of horrid chemicals and burn their hair off to no return just to make a cheap imitation of what grows out of your head naturally. For every minute you're hating your hair there are fifty girls wishing that they had your hair. Now, the first line of your Mantra is: My hair is beautiful. Tell her.” He commanded.

“My hair is beautiful.”

He carefully pulled her hair back and put it in a high poof of springy curls at the top of her head, “These eyes.” Connor said tracing his finger down her cheek, “This nose, these lips. They are yours. Not your mother’s. That man hurt you. It wasn't right and it wasn't your fault.” Connor said. Mia felt her chest clench.

“But”- Tears began to blur her vision.

“Your mom had one job and that was to protect you and take care of you. She fucked up. It may take her forever to figure that out. She may never figure it out, but it wasn't your fault.”

“Connor”- Mia’s voice cracked.

“Don’t look at me! Look at her! That poor girl in the mirror! Tell her it’s not her fault!”

“I”-

“Mia say it.”

“But”-

“It’s not your fault, Mia.” Connor said hugging her shoulders and leaning his head in her hair poof, “Tell her it’s not her fault. Say it.”

“I-It’s not your fault.” Mia whispered. It felt like a weight had been lifted.

“Say it again.”

“It’s not your fault.” It was like fresh breath of air after drowning, “It’s not my fault. It’s not my fault he hurt me. He was wrong. I was innocent and he hurt me. It’s not my fault. It’s not my fault.” Something new was brewing.

“How do you feel now?” Connor asked leaning his chin on her poof now so she could see his eyes again.

“Angry,” Mia growled, “what gives him the right to hurt me like that?”

“Absolutely nothing,” Connor reassured her, “Some people are just scum.”

She felt righteous. She wanted shout out, but she knew Connor’s Mom was downstairs and would probably be startled so she didn't.

“How do you feel now?”

“Good.” Mia said smiling at Connor.

“You look good.” Connor said smiling back, “Welcome back to the world of the living, Mia Price. Now,” he said leaning over her shoulder he pulled the collar of her shirt away from her chest so he could see her bra, “About the fat pockets.” Mia crossed her arms over her chest closing her shirt and elbowed Conner in the stomach. He stumbled back, “This is the thanks I get for trying to help a friend?” He sounded a bit winded. Serves him right…

“Looking down my shirt and ogling my breasts is not helping me.”

“Did you just say ogling?” Connor snorted, “What are you a 50’s house wife?”

“Shut-up!” Mia said stomping her foot. How was he so helpful in an emotional breakthrough one moment and a horny twelve year old the next?

“I suppose that’s enough for today.” Connor said, “Let’s play Street Fighter.”

After taking Mia through the training stages of Street Fighter they played match after match until the sun was low.

"I should leave soon. Dad says I'm not allowed out after dark."

"It's cool I'll drive you." Connor said standing up stretching. When they got to her house Mia wasn't really sure what to do. She was nervous again. She couldn't just say bye after everything that had happened, "Do you remember your Mantra?"

"Uhm...My hair is beautiful?"

"That's just the first line. Your hair is beautiful. You are beautiful. It's not your fault." Connor said, "Say it."

"My hair is beautiful. I am beautiful. It's not my fault."

"OK good now you repeat that in the mirror five times when you wake up and five times before you go to bed."

"For how long." Mia snorted.

"I'm not joking. It's your homework. You do it for as long as it takes, until you believe it, truly believe it." Connor said, "Got it Cadet?"

"Yessir," Mia said saluting.

"I'll see you tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?"

"Unless you've got something better to do."

"Why are you doing all this?" It was a thought that wasn't filtered before it came out.

"Because I like you Mia," Connor said, "You're smart and funny and not ugly. Don't think too much about it. Let it be what it is and we might stay friends for longer than 5 minutes."

"OK,"

"I mean it Mia." Connor said, "If shit get's weird we can't hang out."

"OK I get it." Mia didn't want to get it. She wanted there to be something more, for Connor to want something more. But what was the alternative?

"See you tomorrow." He said leaning over her to open her door.

"See you tomorrow," Mia said getting out of her car.

She closed the door and the window rolled down. Mia made sure to hold her shirt collar down as she leaned down.

"Tell your Dad I'm taking you shopping tomorrow." Connor said, "I'm sure we can find something to fit your fat pockets." He winked.

Mia rolled her eyes, "Good bye Connor." She turned and walked up to her house as Connor peeled off back down the road to his house.