Amnesia

Luke slowly opened the door to Ainsley’s hospital room, and he couldn’t control the quiet gasp that escaped his lips as he saw his girlfriend lying in the hospital bed. Her head was bandaged up, she had a small scrape on her cheek, and her right arm and right leg were both wrapped in a cast. Granted she didn’t look as bad as Luke was picturing in his mind—her head and face completely covered in scratches and deep cuts, both of her eyes black, and all of her limbs covered in a cast—it still wasn’t something that he wanted or ever hoped to see.

Ainsley’s father, Jeremy, was leaning over his daughter and having a quiet conversation with her. Once they heard the hospital room door open, they both looked over at Luke. Jeremy smiled at Luke, while Ainsley had a confused look on her face, her brows knitted together and her mouth in the shape of an ‘O’. Luke silently made his way over to the side of the hospital bed.

“I’ll leave you two alone,” Jeremy said, before kissing Ainsley’s forehead gently. He patted Luke on the shoulder and then made his exit from the room, leaving Luke and Ainsley staring awkwardly at each other.

“Hi, Ainsley,” Luke said, his voice soft and gentle, as he pulled up a chair next to the bed and sat down.

Ainsley’s tired eyes looked the blonde boy with a lip ring up and down, clearly not recognizing him. “Hi.”

Luke cleared his throat, not knowing where to take this conversation. He was trying with everything in him not to let a tear fall, knowing that may scare Ainsley considering she had no idea who he was. He let out a sigh and gently set his hand on top of hers. “Do you know who I am?”

Shaking her head and awkwardly pulling her hand away from Luke’s, Ainsley stared into Luke’s eyes. “I don’t know. Have we met?”

Luke’s eyes continued to sting with tears. He paused for a minute as he tried to compose himself, before he opened his mouth, his lips trembling. “Yeah. We have, actually. I know this is going to sound odd to you, but I’m your boyfriend.”

Ainsley just stared at Luke’s teary-eyed expression without showing any emotion. So, Luke continued.

“My name is Luke Hemmings. We’ve been dating for over two years. You were on the phone with me when you got into the accident.”

“I don’t remember that,” Ainsley mumbled as she glanced out the window of the hospital room, as if purposefully avoiding eye contact with Luke. “I don’t remember having a boyfriend.”

A single tear fell from Luke’s eye as he went to reach for Ainsley’s hand again. And as if she sensed his hand nearing hers, her head turned back to look at Luke, who quickly pulled his hand away.

“Sorry, babe, it’s a habit,” he said awkwardly as he placed his hand in his lap. He sighed loudly. “Shit, sorry. I didn’t mean to call you that. I mean, I did, but…I didn’t.”

“I’m assuming that’s what you used to call me,” Ainsley said as she rested her head back against her pillow.

Luke nodded his head. “Yeah.”

It was silent between the two of them for a good five minutes. Luke sat there looking down at his hands, hoping that somehow Ainsley would remember him and what they had together. Ainsley laid in the hospital bed in complete silence as she kept glancing from Luke and then at the TV that was protruding out of the corner of the room, and then back to Luke. The only sound between them was the noises from the machines that Ainsley was hooked up to, and Luke wished that he had something more to say, but he felt like anything that he said wouldn’t matter to Ainsley due to the fact that she didn’t remember him.

“I’m sorry,” Ainsley said as if she was reading Luke’s mind. “That I don’t remember you.”

“It’s not your fault,” Luke commented as his head snapped up to look at Ainsley. She was staring intently at Luke now, as if she was staring at him but also looking straight through him, like her mind was in another place. He was wondering if she was even paying attention to him at all. “I just wished that you remembered me, that’s all.”

“Well, it’s not like I asked for this to happen,” she snapped, catching Luke off guard, as she started to get upset. “I have so many things running through my head and I’m just so confused, okay?”

“I—,” Luke began, but then stopped as he noticed that Ainsley’s eyes were tearing up. Her lips began to tremble as she looked out the window again to keep from making eye contact with Luke. Luke felt an emptiness in the pit of his stomach, and he didn’t know what he could say to Ainsley to make her feel better. It was as if he didn’t know her anymore and she was some stranger he got put into a room with. It was one of the most awkward and upsetting situations he had ever been in, and he knew it had to be worse for her. But that didn’t mean that his patience wasn’t wearing thin as well.

Ainsley let out a quiet whimper. “It’s like I wake up from being unconscious and everyone is just nailing me with all sorts of stuff. My parents asking me questions, nurses asking me questions, doctors barging in and out asking questions,” she looked over at Luke as tears began to stream down her face. “I don’t know what you want me to say to you, Luke. I just don’t remember you, I’m sorry. I’m not going to lie to you.”

“Don’t be sorry,” Luke said, another tear running down his cheek. He wiped it away quickly as he felt anger and stress rush over his body. “I just don’t really know what to say to you right now.”

As if she didn’t hear anything he said, she continued to cry. “I don’t know who I really am, I don’t know where I go to school, I don’t know what classes I’m taking. I don’t know who any of my friends are, and I apparently have a boyfriend.”

“I can help you with all of that, if you would just let me,” Luke whispered as he stared at her, not bothering to wipe the other tears that managed to escape his cloudy eyes.

“This is still so scary and weird to me, Luke,” she said, letting out a frustrated groan. She wiped at her eyes with her left hand that had a couple of scratches on it. “I don’t even want to think about all of that right now.”

“You don’t think this is scary and weird for me?” Luke asked her, his tone coming off a little harsher than he anticipated. Ainsley looked taken back as Luke clenched his jaw. “My girlfriend of over two years has no idea who I am. She doesn’t want my help, and she doesn’t want anything to do with me.”

More tears fell from Ainsley’s eyes as Luke continued.

“You act like not remembering me isn’t a big deal, Ainsley,” he said, anger filling his voice. “I feel like you don’t even want to try to get to know me again or understand that we had something,” he threw his arms up in the air as he stood up from the chair. “Two days ago you were telling me how much you loved me and last week I ate dinner at your fucking house with you and your parents.”

“Just leave,” Ainsley cried, her voice shaking. Her shoulders began to tremble as well as she looked down at her lap. “Please, just go.”

Luke didn’t say another word as he turned for the door and walked out of the room, letting the door slam behind him.