Write Myself Out Of The History Books

April 2005:

Maria:

2 Days Later:

"So, um, Maria," Jack mumbled. "What exactly happened on Saturday?"
"Jack, how many times do I have to say this!? Nothing happened!" I sighed as we at on my porch.
"Okay."
"Have you talked to Alex lately." I asked.
"Yeah, this morning. Have you?" Jack said leaning back in his chair.
"No, not since Saturday night." I sighed looking down at my hands.
"Oh."
"Yeah. I'm fine though."
"Sure, Ree." Jack said and stood up. "I gotta go though."
"Why?" I sighed.
"We have a show around 9, which is only 2 hours away, so I better get going."
"Oh, okay. You go off and be a rock-star." I pouted.
"Don't pout." Jack laughed. "I'll see you later."

I wasn't fine. I was far from fine. My world has been turned upside down. My parents are gone, I got raped, my friends were all busy, and my best friend wasn't talking to me.
Yeah. Life's great.
So in an effort to cheer me up Jena came over and we decided to go out to the movies.
"What do you want to see?" She asked looking at the list of movies.
"I don't know." I grumbled not wanting to be there in the first place.
"How about Saw II?" Jena looked at me.
"Sure."
As long as it wasn't heart warming, romantic, or sappy it was fine by me. I couldn't take the sentimental shit right now.
"Okay. I'll get it." She said taking out her wallet.
"No, Jen, you don't need to." I said laying a hand on hers.
"Yes I do, Maria."
"Alright, alright." I sighed and let her get the tickets.

So, the movie was scary. Okay, really scary. But I still couldn't stop thinking about the look on Alex's face. He was so mad at me. He's never been that mad at me. Never.
"Holy fucking shit that was scary!" Jena said clinging to me as we walked out of the theater.
"It was scary." I said in a monotone.
"Ree! Cheer up!" Jena's whined.
"I'm happy."
"No you're not."
I just shook my head and walked faster then her so she couldn't see my face.
"Will you please just talk to him?" She said and put her arm around me.
"I can't, they're doing a show right now." I said stubbornly.
"Where?"
"The Marketplace, I think. I remember Alex saying something about it a week or so ago."
"Well let's move! " Jena said and pulled me to her car.
"Jen, please, I really don't want to." I groaned.
"I know," she said and turned on her car. "But I'm making you."

We arrived at The Marketplace during All Time Low's last song and I stood near the back of the venue while Jena went to flirt with Zack.
A few girls waved at me, who recanized me from former shows, and tried to smile back.
But my eyes were glued on Alex as he jumped up and down like a crazy person during Coffee Shop Soundtrack.

Alex was now signing autographs and taking pictures with his growing numbers of groupies. I was still staring at Alex when Rian snuck up behind me.
"You should talk to him." He said into my ear, making me jump.
"Oh,shit! Rian you scared me." I said loudly causing Alex to glance at me.
"Sorry," Rian smiled. "But you should talk to him."
"That's what I hear." I said as Alex, who had a stoney expression, turned back to the fans.
"Hey, he's really beating himself up about this, Ree. He's worried about what happened between you and that shit-face." RIan said turning me to face him.
"Okay, okay!" I sighed. "I'll talk to him."
Rian smiled and pushed me towards Alex.
"Alex," I said walking up to him. "Can we talk?"
"Can we do it later?" He asked looking annoyed.
I sighed, "Not really. Now or never."
"Fine," Alex said breaking away from the pack. "How about in the parking lot?"
I tried to smile, "That's good."
"Well are you coming or not?"
"Uh, yeah." I said and followed Alex into the parking lot.
I was starting to freak out. What would Alex say to me?
"So..." I sighed. "Why did you walk out the other day?"
"I was tired of the lies and shit." He stated in a serious voice.
I just stared at him with my mouth open, "You can't be serious."
"I'm very serious, Maria. You're so different these days. I feel like I don't know you at all. It seems like you're drifting away from everyone. It's like you just don't give a shit anymore!" Alex said his voice rising.
"I'm different! How have I changed, Alex!?"
"You're so distant and you're attitude has changed! You drink a lot more! You do drugs, Maria! And don't you fucking deny it! Because we all know you do! Rian found a joint in your house! And all your other 'friends' are giving you this stuff! Because they don't care about you! We care about you! Your true friends!"
"What the fuck do you mean they're not my real friends!? They care about me! It seems to me, like you guys don't care anymore! We don't hang out anymore! And so what if I smoke a joint now and then?!" I screamed.
I was really getting pissed off now.
"That's the thing, Maria! I don't think you're smoking a joint 'every now and then!' I think you're doing it a lot! Where did you even get the money for the drugs and stuff!? It's not like you have a alot of money! Fuck, you don't even have a job!" He yelled back.
"You wanna know, Alex?! You wanna fucking know how I get money?! I'll tell you how I get money! I strip!" I yelled and he looked shocked. "Yeah! I fucking strip! I'm a fucking pole dancer! And I don't care what you think about me, because you're right! I don't give a shit!"
"You whore." Alex said under his breath.
"How dare you!" I screamed.
By this time people were staring openly at us screaming at each other and I could see Jack, Rian and Zack running over.
"I always thought you were, but this just conferms it! You're a whore, Maria!" Alex yelled pointing a finger at me.
"I can't believe you! You, you BASTARD!!! I hate you!!" I screamed and slapped his face as hard as I could.
"Woah!" Zack yelled as the three of them came running over.
"I don't ever want to see you again!" I screamed tears welling up in my eyes.
"Good!" Alex yelled back and Zack and Rian grabbed his shoulders.
I quickly turned on my heels and walked towards my car.
"Maria!" Jack yelled after me and came running up.
"Go away, Jack." I mumbled wipping away my tears.
"Please, Ree." Jack said in the sweetest softest voice I ever heard.
"Jack, I just need to get away. I can't take my life right now. And Alex has made it even more difficult."
"Don't go just because of Alex. Please, Maria! We love you." Jack said putting his hands on my shoulders and looking into my eyes.
"I know. But Alex doesn't anymore. He's made that perfectly clear." I sighed and the tears started coming again.
"Ree, please don't cry. Don't cry about Alex." Jack said and pulled me into a tight, warm hug.
"I need to go, Jack." I said ino his shoulder. "I need to get the fuck out."