When Does the Pretending End?

Lucy’s Pov

“Are you sure you want to go back tonight. It’s late” Josh says as I stand at the door. “Yes I’m sure. I just need to think. All this mess with Tina and next week coming up, I just want my own bed” I say. “I would try to change your mind but I know you so I won’t. Just let me know when you get home” he says as he takes my bag to the taxi. “Enjoy spending time with your Dad Josh. I’ll see you Monday at work” I say. “I’m here if you want to talk” he says. “Thanks Josh” I say getting into the taxi.

Its 10.30 when I reach Manchester on the train. I get a taxi to Cristiano’s house. I guess I could go back to my apartment but for some reason I want to go to his house.
I ring the buzzer at the gate and Elma answers “Hello”. “Hey Elma it’s Lucy” I say. “Hey your back” she says and the gate opens. I pay the taxi driver and the door swings open. “Lucy what are you doing back” Dolores asks hugging me. “Máe isn’t it obvious she missed Cristiano” Elma says standing at the door. “Well he’ll be happy to see you. Let’s get inside” Dolores says. “How was London?” Katia asks when we reach the kitchen. “It was good” I say looking around the room. “He’s not here. He’s gone out with his friends” Elma whispers. “I know” I say biting my lip. “He is. He missed you this weekend” she says. “Is Rodrigo in bed?” I ask Katia turning away from Elma. I knew Cristiano was going out tonight I hadn’t realised that I was looking for him.
“Would you like something to eat?” Dolores asks. “No thank you. I’m not hungry” I say.

“Are you ok Lucy?” Dolores asks putting her arms around my shoulder. “Yeah” I say and a tear begins to form in my eyes. “Oh Lucy what’s the matter” she asks and turns me into a hug. “Do you want me to call my brother?” Katia asks and I shake my head pulling out of Dolores’s arms before I start to cry. “No don’t do that. He deserves to have some fun” I say. “Are you sure?” Elma asks. “Yeah I just had a bad weekend that’s all” I say. “I knew it the two of ye have a fight?” Elma says. “No Elma we didn’t. You really should stop thinking bad about your brother” I say. “You tell her Lucy” Katia says and grins at Elma.

“What happened so? Cristiano said you went to visit a friend” Elma says.
“I did. My friend Tina is in rehab” I say as we all sit on the couch. “Oh I’m sorry” Dolores says. “I went with her brother to see her. I’ve known her since I came to England. I didn’t know show she was doing drugs” I say. “Some people are good at hiding things” Elma says. “I know but she’s my best friend. We hadn’t been spending that much time together between my work and her new boyfriend. I should have known” I say.

“Lucy you can’t blame yourself” Katia says. “That’s what Cristiano said” I say. “For once he is right then” Elma says. “I’ll tell him you said that” I say.
“It’s hard. You can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be helped. Trust me I know. Both my husband and son were addicts” Dolores says. “I’m sorry. That must have been awful” I say.
“It was but family helps you get through anything” she says. I wouldn’t know about family support.
“I just can’t get my head around the fact that I didn’t know” I say.

“When Hugo first got into drugs none of us knew. Cristiano paid for treatment. He was only earning a small amount of money nothing like he is now but he wouldn’t let his brother destroy his life” Dolores says.

“Addiction is hard. But Hugo came through it” Katia says. “Pitty Papa didn’t” Elma mumbles. “Elma enough” Dolores shouts. “I’ll get you some apple pie” she says to me and heads to the kitchen.
“Nice one Elma” Katia says. “I only have vanilla ice cream left” Dolores says handing me a plate with a slice of apple pie and ice cream on it. “Thank you Dolores” I say. “My son seems to like eating my chocolate mint ice cream” she says and I resits a smile. I think back to sitting here on the couch with Cristiano. He was so sweet getting me ice cream and looking through my photos.

“They said they wouldn’t be late” Katia says to me. “Sorry” I say. “They boys said they wouldn’t be out late. You were looking at your watch” she says. I hadn’t realised that I did. “I think I’ll head to bed” Dolores says. “I think I might head upstairs to take a shower and go to bed too” I say. “Oh stay and watch a film with Elma and I” Katia says. “Yeah we’re watching Grease” Elma says rolling her eyes at Katia. “Hey I like that film” I say and Katia gives Elma a smug look. “Let me take a quick shower and I’ll be down” I say.

Soon I’m sitting with Katia and Elma in the movie room. “So you and my brother” Elma says. “What about us?” I ask warily. “Leave her alone Elma” Katia laughs. “It’s nice to see him happy that’s all” Elma says. “He’s happy because his family are around him” I say. “Yeah right” she says.

“Well he’ll be even more happier when he sees Lucy here” Katia says. He probably didn’t miss me that much I think looking at the screen. “They should be home soon. Zé said he wouldn’t be long” she says. “Everything ok between you and Zé” I ask quietly. “Better” she says. “Good. Cristiano was worried you know” I say.

Marcosa who had been sitting beside me with her head on my lap looks up and growls. We hear the door bang. “The boys are home” Elma says. “About time too it’s 1.30” Katia says and Elma rolls her eyes as the door behind us opens.

And I turn to face the door.