Dark Waters

Sigrid
..::~^~::..
“Alduin was my older brother,” he explained, “I betrayed him. He had become so arrogant – he honestly believed he was a god. I, among many other dragons, left his side during the war between humans and dragons. We helped mankind. We taught them the way of the voice,” I remembered that story from many of the readings I had gone through once I started this journey. The name registered immediately.

“You’re Paarthurnax,” I said, finally dropping my bow. His eyes blinked to tell me that I was correct. I placed my bow back over my shoulder, and sheathed the arrow.

“I am,” he said, looking out over Skyrim. We were at the Throat of the World – the highest mountain in Skyrim. Up here, there was always snow, “There is a shout, it is called Dragonrend. However, you are not strong enough to possess this shout, nor can I teach it to you.”

“That barely helps me,” I scolded. What use was something I could not get, “Could you at least tell me how I can get this shout? Where I can get it?”

“Does it not? How much farther were you from figuring out how to defeat Alduin before this knowledge?” Paarthurnax did not seem at all offended by my outburst. In fact, he almost seemed amused. I looked down at my feet – he was right. I had searched through many scrolls, books, and old ruins looking for the shout that would help me. Now I wasn’t going in blind ever time. I knew what shout I needed. I just needed to obtain it.

“But how do I learn it?” I asked, this time more calmly.

“From those who made it,” He no doubt answered my question, but it was still so vague, that only created more questions. I knew at this point he would not give me the direct questions.

“You’re not going to tell me anymore, are you?” It was just barely a question, but I needed the conformation – the dismissal. His large head nodded.

“You have much more to learn, Dovahkiin. But the knowledge you seek from this point on will be in the form of a scroll. An Elder’s Scroll,” this had also been something I read about, except I read about Elder Scrolls heavily. There are believed to be many Elder Scrolls, however, one I read about particularly was the Dragon Elder Scroll. I had an idea that this scroll could contain information I needed, however research on the scrolls made them off-putting.

“That would make sense…but, reading those scrolls. Don’t they cause the reader to lose their vision, or their minds?” This was something I was very concerned about, as I really liked having my mind intact, “I heard that if somebody doesn’t have a special sight particular for reading the Elder Scrolls, they do not see what is written. They then go blind and insane,” the thought of it made me cringe inwardly.

“You are Dovahkiin,” Paarthurnax stated, “You must understand that you have very special abilities. You were meant to read this scroll,” Thinking about this lifted my spirits. Suddenly, things started to make sense. I was the Dragonborn, therefor I had an instinct to want to rid the world of dragons. It just wasn’t for the same reason that I began to hate them initially. I needed that shove. Was my fate the reason Nev died? I couldn’t even think about that…

But I was meant to stop the dragons from taking the world over. All of the things I would have to go through to get this scroll is to make me strong enough to defeat Alduin. I knew I would have a long journey ahead of me, but I would need to stop by the Guild. I would need to rest. Niruin and I had been going on week long quests on and off for a while, and this upcoming time would be especially testy for me. I was hoping I would see Vitrin back, and I knew I would see Brynjolf. At this, my face grew red. I scolded myself for this.

“After I find this scroll,” I said, shaking my thoughts, and turning my attention back to Paarthurnax, “I come back up here?”

“I am confident that by the time you find that scroll, you will know exactly what to do,” He, of course, did not answer my question. I took it as a yes, however. If by any chance I didn’t know what to do, I knew he would at least point me in the right direction. I also knew that if he was confident in me, then I would have to be confident in myself.

“Thank you, Paarthurnax,” I said. I bowed, stupidly, as I didn’t know exactly what to do, “Am I free to leave?”

“Sigrid Laucifür, you are free to do as you please. Please do not mistake me for a god. I am just a wise, old dragon,” I’m sure if dragons could smile, he would, but you could sort of see it in his eyes. I gave a small courteous bow again as I descended the steps back to the Greybeards, where they seemed to be waiting expectantly.

“Did you find what you were looking for, Dovahkiin?” Arngier asked. I nodded to answer him.

“I know what I must do,” I said, and then realized this was a lie in its own way, “I know what I must achieve. What I do between then and now…I’m not so sure,”

“We have faith in you,” Argnier said, smiling slightly. This made me slightly aware that everybody on this mountain had confidence in me. If they knew I could do what I needed to do, which was defeat Alduin, then I knew I could do it.

“Yes, and I must learn to have faith in myself. I will not start right away, but I will start soon. I will stop at nothing until he is defeated,” I swore. I left after this, knowing I needed to get back to the Guild. I wanted to talk to Melvin again. He had his funny way of setting my mind right. Knowing my confused feelings towards Brynjolf would completely throw my mind off, though. Niruin had the ability to calm me down. He’d been able to do it throughout all of my anger and frustration in our times together. Vitrin, I still had yet to get to know her. I knew many of the people in the Guild had a lot of respect for her. This said tons about her character. Yet, I knew she didn’t trust me. I did, however, trust her. I knew what that said about my own character, but she was a part of the Guild. In a way, it was a lot like the Brotherhoold. The Brotherhood held no secrets, and it held no lies. Well, at least I thought it didn’t. Astrid did not hold these qualities, I knew. I could not say much about the others. How many of them knew? I began growing upset just at the thought.

This really needed to stop bothering me. I needed to get over it. If I let feelings of my past get in the way, it would ruin everything. I just needed one memory to drive me. It was the pain of seeing Nevaris’s head hit the ground. That pain soon turned to anger, and lately, that anger is what I needed to fuel me. Without it, I’m not sure how I would be able to get through all of the puzzles and the tasks that have been put before me, and are before me now.

My mind was clouded as I rode Shadowsmere in the direction of Riften. The bottom of the 7,000 steps was not far from the city, and I had a little time before sunset. I just wanted a familiar bed, and to see familiar faces. I let my mind continue to wander as I rode.

..::~^~::..

The day was ending by covering everything in a gold-orange glow. I could see the wooden docks of Riften, with a ship at the port. I was happy to be close, as I was worn out and well-spent. I had been up longer than I even wanted to think about, and realized how seldom sleep even came to me. Most of the time, when I did get to sleep, my thoughts would haunt me, and then they would follow into my dreams, causing nightmares.

My thoughts vanished as I rode up to the gates of Riften. The guards let me in and I head to the cemetery behind the temple. I enter a chamber with a fake coffin, pull the chain, and am let into the Cistern. As I do this, Shadowsmere returns to the shadows. I don’t bother to find anybody to tell them I am back. I instead fall into the first empty bed I see, and my eyes shut.

Thankfully, I am not welcomed by any unconscious thoughts, whether they be dreams or nightmares. I needed to empty my head, and figure out how I was going to find this Elder Scroll, and this one specifically. Who knew how many there were.

By the time I was regaining consciousness, the room was not lively. However, Brynjolf was sitting on the bed next to mine. He sat in my direction, but he stared off, over my body. I don’t think he knew that I was awake and looking at him. I let a cough out before his eyes fell onto me, and I sat up. I didn’t know that I was sore until I did this, and my face scrunched up.

“Are you hurt,” he quickly asked, jumping up to help me. I waved him off until I was sitting on the edge of the bed, facing him. He sat back down.

“I’m not. Just sore. I haven’t had much relaxation time to realize how much stress I’ve been putting my body through. I began to take off some of the light armor I failed to remove before falling into bed.

“I wasn’t sure when I’d see you again,” his voice was soft, and I could feel my face growing red. I let my long black hair veil me so it wasn’t noticeable.

“Coming and going. I’ve found out a lot of valuable information to my cause. That was half the battle. I know what I’m looking for now. It’s just…finding it,” I said, “I need to clear my head before I can do that,” I said.

“This means I have time with you,” he sounded excited, and this caused me to become nervous. My hands became clammy, and my tongue felt big in my mouth. He must have felt how uneasy I had become, “I…I am unsure why, but when you leave, I think about you a lot. I don’t know what these feelings mean, or why I’m having them. I do know that you make me feel different…” he faded off, and I lifted my eyes to meet his.

“I’m here so seldom, though,” I tried to argue.

“I know, that’s why I feel like I should tell you. I have so much time to ponder my feelings for you. When you’re here, I never know when you’re going to leave, or when the next time I’ll see you after that is. I don’t even know what I expect from these feelings. But I do know that if you felt the same, we could figure it out together. That would not happen if I did not share these thoughts with you.” I was still uneasy.

“I will have to think about this,” I said. I had just woke up, and that would just add to the large quantity of things I already had to think about, “Is Melvin in the Rag-“

“He is-“ he cut me off. He seemed slightly discouraged, causing me to feel bad.

“I have also had time to think about you,” I said as I stood up, “I don’t know what exactly – just you. I’m not sure what it means, either. I know that it really should be the last thing I should think about right now,” I said, and without looking at him anymore, I left the Cistern for the Raggon Flaggon, where Melvin usually way, drinking Mead. I sat down in the seat across the table from him as he was mid-drink. Upon spotting me, he lifted an eyebrow.

“Well ‘ello, there, stranger,” he said, taunting me, “didn’t know when I’d seeya again.”

“When does anybody ever know when they’ll see me,” I joked. A mug of mead was placed in front of me, and I sipped at it happily. I couldn’t drink like Melvin could.

“Got’ta point there, girl. How have your adventures been? I see Niruin didn’t return with you on this one. Has he-“ he made a gesture using his pointer finger, and used it to trace his neck from artery to artery. I shook my head.

“I let him go to chase after Vitrin. Have you heard from her?” I asked out of curiosity.

“We have not. We see you more than we see her. That should say ah’ whole lot,” he took another drink from his mug, “So tell me, what are all of these journey’s for?”

“I need to defeat Alduin,” I said. He looked confused, and this time I took a drink from my mug.

“Alduin, ey? He messed with the wrong girl. The Guild will gettum,” he said, standing up, “how can we help?”

“There is a problem,” I said, not getting up from my chair. Melvin cocked his head to the side.

“Not a problem we can’t solve,” he said, not sitting back down.

“I doubt that,” I said. He stared at me a few seconds before responding.

“Well wha’ is it?”

“Alduin is an ancient dragon who has returned to resurrect the rest of the dragons,” I said calmly, and he didn’t seem to believe me.

“I read these stories as a kid. Ain’t the Dragonborn supposed to…” realization hit him. I could see it all over his face, “It’s you’re, in’nit? You’re the Dragonborn.” I didn’t nod my head or say anything. I just looked at him, and he looked a little impressed, “So how can we help?” I big grin snaked its way onto his face.

©Shannon