Falling Is Like This

Loki stared blankly at the disaster that was his room. Most of the books were scattered across the floor, some of them ripped. His desk was tipped on its side, the ink from the inkwell splattered on the floor and nearby wall. The emerald and gold drapes were ripped and stained. Broken glass littered the floor.

It felt as if his entire world was crashing down around him. He wasn't sure who he was anymore. He wasn't Asgardian. And it made perfect sense. He was the average height of a normal Asgardian...but a runt by Jotun standards. He was raised with scary campfire stories of the very thing that he was. How could any loving parent knowingly subject their child to that, albeit their adopted one?

The tiny hole in his heart was growing by the second. Every breath was one of doubt. Every thought was another question. Why? Who else knows? How could you? He suddenly felt like the laughing stock of all the realms. Like everyone knew but him. The darkness threatened to consume him, feeding off his anger and hurt.

He looked up at the wall high above the fireplace, at the large portrait of him and Thor, the king and queen. 'The royal family...' He thought bitterly. "They are no family of mine." He whispered.

OoOoOo

"I thought he'd never leave." Loki released the invisibility spell he'd cast on himself, appearing before Thor.

Thor seemed to snap out of his trance, focusing on his brother. "Loki? What's happened? Tell me! Is it Jotunheim? Let me explain to father-"

"Father is dead." Loki replied. He watched with unprecedented satisfaction as Thor's face paled, his mouth opening in disbelief.

"What?" He whispered.

"Your banishment, the threat of a new war, it was too much for him to bear. The burden of the throne has fallen to me now."

Thor looked up, hopeful. "Can I come home?" This was not the Thor he knew, this whimpering shell of an Asgardian. It disgusted him.

"The truce with Jotunheim is conditional upon your exile."

"But..couldn't We find a way to-"

"Mother has forbidden your return." Loki snapped. Thor looked down and nodded, defeated. "This is goodbye brother. I'm so sorry."

Thor looked up at him, tears in his eyes. "No, I'm sorry. Loki... thank you for coming here." The words caught Loki off guard, but he kept his composure. "Nothing could have stopped me." the words were out before he could stop them. For a brief moment, he felt the warmth in his chest, but the feeling was soon crushed with the memory of red eyes and blue skin. "Farewell brother." He disappeared without another word.

OoOoOo

Loki looked around as he crossed the frozen plain. The wind whipped snow through the air. Regardless of his heritage, Jotunheim was still a frozen wasteland, and he was slightly chilled. He cleared his mind, preparing himself for what he was about to do.

He stepped over fallen boulders and debris from what once must have been a monstrous castle of ice. He could just make out Laufey perched atop his throne. Lifting his chin, he stepped through the crumbled doorway. Several frost giants appeared from the shadows, surrounding him.

The king of the frost giants peered down at him. "Tell me why I shouldn't kill you." He growled.

"I've come alone and unarmed." Loki replied.

"To what end?" Laufey asked.

"To make you another proposition."

Laufey nodded slightly. "So you're the one who let us into Asgard." He stood and slowly descended the dais, looming over Loki.

"You're welcome." Loki smirked.

"My men are dead, and I have no Casket. You are a deceiver." Laufey grabbed Loki by the throat and squeezed.

"You have no idea what I am." He whispered, willing his true form to show itself.

Laufey watched curiously as Loki's pale form took on a blue hue with thin runes raised over his flesh.

Loki looked up at him with crimson eyes. "Hello father."

Laufey released him. He watched with intrigue as Loki's flesh returned to the pale shade of the Asgardians. "Ah, the bastard son. I thought Odin had killed you. That's what I would have done. He's as weak as you are."

Loki smirked again, feeling quite full of himself. "No longer weak." He clasped his hands behind his back."I now rule Asgard, until Odin awakens. Perhaps you should not have so carelessly abandoned me."

Laufey turned and walked back up to the throne. "Or perhaps it was the wisest choice I've ever made. I will hear you."

"I will conceal you and a handful of your soldiers, lead you into his chambers, and let you slay him where he lies. I'll keep the throne, and you will have the Casket."

Laufey studied Loki carefully. "Why would you do this?"

"When all is done, we will have a permanent peace between our two worlds. Then I, the bastard son, will have accomplished what Odin and Thor never could." Loki replied.

The Jotun king leaned forward with a terrifying smile. "This is a great day for Jotunheim. Asgard is finally ours."

"No. Asgard is mine. The rest of the Nine Realms will be yours, if you do as you're told." Loki said sharply.

Laufey narrowed his eyes. "I accept."

"Not so bad for the abandoned bastard of the Jotun king." Loki turned on his heel, disappearing in a flash of light from the Bifrost.

OoOoOo

Seren heard the rustling of fabic and opened her eyes. Loki stood before her in his Asgardian armor and horned helmet. She sat up quickly.

"I didn't think you were coming." She said.

His expression was sombre. "Seren.."

She felt her heart begin to hammer in her chest. "What's wrong?"

Loki removed his helmet, tucking it under his arm. "I..wanted to see you."

"You see me. What's wrong?" She asked, sitting up on her knees. She wore a white sleeveless nightgown. Her hair was disheveled and her cheeks were flushed. The sight of her took his breath away.

He forced a smile that was barely visible in the shadows. "Nothing." He was the God of lies, deceit was one of his best talents, but he found it nearly impossible to lie to her. He could see the slight shift in her eyes, and he knew with a pang of guilt that she'd bought it.

He reached up and unhooked his cape, and then his shoulder pads, his breast plate, and wrist guards. "The last twenty four hours have been...very dark. Very dark indeed." He looked down at the helmet under his arm. "And amidst all of this darkness, I can see the tiniest glimmer of light. My only hope." His throat tightened.

Seren reached out and took the helmet from him, setting it on the table next to the bed. He reached out and took her face in his hands. "You were that light. The knowledge that I would see you again, was the one thing that kept me going." Her hands gripped his wrists.

She opened her mouth to respond but he covered it with his own in a kiss more desperate and passionate than either of them had ever known. He wrapped his arms around her tiny form and gently lowered her onto the bed. He ran his hands through her hair and down the sides of her body until his hands came to her hips. Lifting her gown, he reached under and grabbed her butt. She instinctively wrapped her legs around his waist.

She leaned her head back as he trailed kisses along her jawline and collarbone. She'd always known she'd wanted this since the last time they'd seen each other at prom. While she'd made out heavily with other guys, Cody included- she'd never allowed it to go further than that with the hope that he'd come back. And now he had, and her entire body was an exposed bundle of nerves. She groaned as his lips found her breasts. "Loki..." She whispered.

He took in a deep breath and looked up at her. "I've always wanted to hear you say my name like that."

She dug her nails into his arms as he eased into her. There was only a brief moment of fire-like pain which soon gave way to pure euphoria. He paused as he soon realized what had just occurred. His eyes met hers and he felt an overwhelming sense of adoration and love. He allowed his movements to become more gentle, giving her time to adjust. Their gazes were locked on one another as their bodies melded into one.

Time seemed to stop as the two acted out several years worth of sexual frustration that had built up between them. She arched her back as he pinned her hands above her head, increasing his thrusts. She felt a warm, tingling sensation in her toes that was quickly working it's way up her body. Loki buried his face in her neck with a groan, giving a violent thrust that caused her to scream with pleasure. He collapsed against her, gasping for air. She stroked his hair gently, listening to the sound of his breathing as it slowed.

He rolled onto his side and propped himself up on his arm, staring down at her.

"I love you." She said, looking up at him.

His eyes traveled over every inch of her body, trying to memorize it. The darkness was threatening to creep in and take over, but the thought of her kept it at bay. For the last few, precious hours, he was able to forget.

"Loki!" She said loudly, snapping him out of his daze.

"Yes? Sorry." He said.

"What is wrong? And don't say nothing, because it is evident that something is bothering you." She said.

Loki rolled onto his back and sighed, rubbing his face. "A lot has happened since you were there last." He sat up. My father has fallen into the Odin sleep-you remember the one I told you about?" Seren nodded. "Just before that happened, he banished Thor because of the reckless threat he posed to the kingdom.."

"What?" Seren sat up. "Holy shit...was that his hammer that landed out in the desert?"

'Damn mortals and their need to report every little thing.' Loki nodded and covered his face in his hands as he told her of the events leading up to Odin's condition. He explained to her why Thor was banished and how he was now acting as king

"I have to neutralize any and all threats to the realm. You should know, there are plans that I have put into motion that cannot be undone. But just know that they were necessary. I hope that whatever happens, you know that I will always love you." He said.

Seren's brow furrowed. "Loki, what have you done?"

He looked out at the lightening horizon. "What I had to do." He turned and looked at her. "Marry me."

Seren was caught off guard. "Loki, I...we.."

It wasn't what he expected. The darkness returned. "Know that what I've done and what I will do, is what I've had to do. It's all for the best." He stroked her hair gently. "Come find me, when you've decided."

"Loki, what...." She suddenly felt unbearably tired. Her eyes grew heavy. "Loki what....What have you done?" She whispered. Sleep overcame her. Loki lowered her onto the pillows. With a single thought, his clothes were back on. He picked up his helmet and tucked it back under his arm.

"I love you." He said, leaning down to kiss her cheek.

OoOoOo

Loki emerged from the Bifrost, barely acknowledging Heimdall as he descended his post. There was much to do and he didn't have time for the guardian's scrutiny. He could feel his eyes on him and knew he was suspicious. "What troubles you gatekeeper?" He asked as he passed him.

"I turned my gaze upon you in Jotunheim, but could neither see nor hear you. You were shrouded from me, like the Frost Giants who entered this Realm." His voice was calm, but accusing.

Loki felt a surge in his adrenaline, but his face remained hardened and calm. "Perhaps your senses have weakened after your many years of service."

Heimdall looked down at Loki from the steps he stood on. "Or perhaps someone has found a way to hide that which he does not wish me to see."

Loki smiled up at him. "You have great power, Heimdall. Tell me, did Odin ever fear you?"

"No."

"And why is that?"

"Because he is my King, and I am sworn to obey him."

Loki narrowed his eyes, his jaw set. "Exactly. Just as you're sworn to obey me now. Yes?"

Heimdall clearly did not like the answer, but he responded. "Yes."

"Good." He turned and stalked towards the rainbow bridge. "Then you will open the Bifrost to no one until I have undone what my brother has started."

OoOoOo

Loki quietly entered the All Father's chambers. The room was a bit brighter with the rays of the morning glowing behind the drapes. Candles were lit around the room and a fire roared on the opposite wall. Frigga sat next to her husband, resting her head next to his.

Loki walked to her, taking care to keep quiet. He looked down at her. The only mother he'd ever known, was not his to keep. But knowing what he was and still treating him with the kindness she had, should have meant something. The darkness would not allow it. In a sudden, terrifying thought, he realized how easy it would be to end her life. He sucked in a deep breath at the shocking thought.

Frigga stirred at the noise. "Loki?" She sat up and wrapped her shaw around her shoulders. "Is everything alright?"

Loki pressed his lips together in a convincing smile. "All is well. I didn't mean to wake you, I only wanted to see how he was."

Frigga pushed a few strands of hair out of her eyes and looked down at Odin. "Unchanged. Perhaps that is a good thing, I'm not sure."

Loki nodded. "Perhaps you should get some rest."

Frigga smiled. "I'll not be separated from your father. He knows I'm here." She patted Odin's hand. "Are you sure you are alright?"

Loki admired her devotion, and his thoughts quickly turned to Seren. He leaned down and kissesd her forehead. "If anything should change, notify me immediately." He said.

Frigga nodded and patted his cheek. "You'll be the first to know, dearest."

Loki nodded and made his way to the exit. when he was outside he turned to the guard and ordered three more posted at the door. "No one is to enter without my knowledge." He then turned and made his way quickly towards the weapons vault.

OoOoOo

Seren rolled onto her side, stretching her arms out next to her. He fingers brushed the cool, empty sheets. She opened her eyes and sat up. He wasn't there. "Loki?"

When she received no answer, she threw the blankets off of her and looked in the bathroom. She then hurried into the living room. Empty. Kitchen, empty. Guest room, empty.

She ran her hands through her hair wondering if she'd dreamt it, but the tenderness in her thighs and hips told her otherwise. The last thing she remembered was Loki's hand on her face. "Son of a bitch." She said when realization dawned on her.

She was suddenly very angry. She walked into the bedroom and pulled a pair of pants and a sweatshirt out of her suitcase. He had no right to cast a spell on her. She buttoned her jeans and was struggling to find the hole in the sweater for her head when a sudden thought occurred to her. '..I have to neutralize any and all threats to the realm...' surely to God he didn't mean...Thor was his brother, he would never...

She turned to her vanity mirror. "Loki! I know you can hear me. Look at me!" She grabbed the mirror on both sides, her heart pounding in her ears. "Loki!"

She pulled out her phone and quickly searched for the satellite that had crashed in the desert. It was the first news story that appeared. "Puente Antiguo...New Mexico?" She sucked in a deep breath and grabbed her car keys. She dialed the number for the airport. "I need a ticket for the immediate next flight to New Mexico please."