Sequel: Apathy ›
Oblivion
Chapter Fifteen
Kellin's POV:
Five days had passed since I was in any contact with Vic or Alena. Justin and I had been getting along fairly well, but we still weren't on a good foot. The band hasn't had a meet in over two months, and I'm starting question if we even are a band anymore. No ones made an effort, not even me. I'm just tired and really confused right now. Jenna was ecstatic about warped tour, and so was I. I went a few years back and it was fun, but now that I have someone to go with, that's going to make it better. Just three more days until I can get away from this personal bullshit for once.
Currently, I've been reading quite a bit, which is weird because I rarely read anymore. I've just forgotten how peaceful it is to get sucked into a fantasy world. Because if you think about it, most people want to get away and I've just come to the conclusion that books help you do just that.
But books aren't books until they've been opened and the pages have been read.
I think people underestimate the meanings of books sometimes. Sure, anyone can write a book if they have enough determination, but it won't become it's own until you have people interested and starting to go into your own fantasy. That's what people don't understand. Everyone thinks books don't matter and that anyone can write one, but that's not how it works. Basically anyone can write words and a story set, but rarely can anyone pull off a book.
But it doesn't matter to me anyways, because most authors I dislike. I think it's because they get stuck inside their heads for a little too long and then become selfish and hypocritical. It amazes me though how good the outcomes of those situations are though.
Enough book talk, sometimes I like explaining things to the little voice inside my head which seems to be the only one who listens anymore. If I have a statement, opinion, or I just want to talk, I always can and I'm glad that I can do just that. I'd be a complete source of insanity if otherwise.
I looked up from my book to see the clock striking seven. Justin got home earlier and went into our, well his room and we never really talked. I've been sleeping on the couch because I feel uncomfortable being around Justin for extended periods of time. Quite honestly, I half heartily would rather be staying at Vic's. But I can't go back there, I can't be weak and crawl back to him. Even though I'm shallow and dumb at points, whatever I had to offer, he didn't deserve.
Him and I were like a continues card game. The deals never ended and when all the cards were on the table we restarted the game and here we are. But I'm not playing round three. No matter how much that decent side of me says that I need to straighten things out, I won't do it. There was nothing for me to sort out, right?
He told me we couldn't be together because of Jaime's death, but then magically when he heard that this all was Alena's fault, he changed his mind. I'm not just an object that he can choose whenever he pleases. I don't feel that he's dedicated and that's what hurts the most, the thought of him not devoting himself to me.
Anymore, I'm not mad, I'm just dazed and irritated at the way he uses me. But I'm not being used anymore. Until he's stating that this is a commitment and not some game, I'm not even talking to him.
Tomorrow, I'd need to go out and find myself another job, considering I quit at Starbucks. It makes me sick just thinking about her. The mall would have other jobs to apply for, i'm sure of it. But for now, I just wanted to sit and read, I have no energy because I haven't slept good for past three days. And that's a problem because I need plenty of sleep for warped tour in three days. The weirdest was that I get my cast removed in two days, just one day before warped tour. And I'm just glad it came out as that, because I wouldn't want to walk around with a brace all day.
Getting back into the book, I started to get drowsy and ended falling asleep, which was weird because rarely do I take naps.
---
Still in a sleepy state, I heard the door knob turn and then the door slam shut.
"Justin?" I questioned groggily.
"Sorry to wake you," he said with a chuckle. I shook my head.
"It's okay, why are you home early?"
"The manager let me go home early, he didn't tell me why though."
"Are the employing?"
"Actually, yes we are, do you want me to ask the boss about it?"
"Yes please that'd really help." I was now super happy. I'd finally get to work at Hot Topic, that is if they employ me.
"I'll talk to the boss, it's okay."
"Thank you," I said, standing up and going into the kitchen. That nap made me really hungry.
So I guess I may get a job at Hot Topic and I get to go see bands in two days, things are going perfect here.
---
Vic's POV:
Things are going horrible here. Jaime's gone and it's all because of his old friend and myself. Then, on top of that, I lost Kellin after only two days of dating. I don't blame him for walking away, I shouldn't have broken it off so easily. So now, I was alone in this daunting house on which I felt uncomfortable in. Every night I missed Jaime being here, but I also missed Kellin.
Not being able to talk to Kellin was tearing me apart on the inside right now. He was the one person I needed to talk to and I've ruined it. I've called him, but he never answers and I've left voice mails, but he never calls me back. He's blocked me out and I don't have a good way to contact him. Sure, I could drive there and see him, but he'd get mad and slam the door on me. He isn't at Starbucks anymore and I have no clue where he's working now. All I know is he's going to...warped tour in...two- wait! That's it. Warped tour.
If I go, I could possibly find him and talk to him, right? It may tricky, but I know what his schedule is because he showed me. We were going to go together, but that's not happening now. But as well as I know Kellin, he wouldn't give up those tickets just because he couldn't take me. He'd take Jenna or one of his other friends.
So, that's what I got to do. In two days, I'll go to warped tour, buy the tickets, and find Kellin. Right now, it doesn't matter if he doesn't want to be with me again, all that matters is that he knows how sorry I am and that I don't want to block him out of my life. I was foolish when I said that shit, I didn't mean any of it. It wasn't his fault and I need to let him know that I care.
Five days had passed since I was in any contact with Vic or Alena. Justin and I had been getting along fairly well, but we still weren't on a good foot. The band hasn't had a meet in over two months, and I'm starting question if we even are a band anymore. No ones made an effort, not even me. I'm just tired and really confused right now. Jenna was ecstatic about warped tour, and so was I. I went a few years back and it was fun, but now that I have someone to go with, that's going to make it better. Just three more days until I can get away from this personal bullshit for once.
Currently, I've been reading quite a bit, which is weird because I rarely read anymore. I've just forgotten how peaceful it is to get sucked into a fantasy world. Because if you think about it, most people want to get away and I've just come to the conclusion that books help you do just that.
But books aren't books until they've been opened and the pages have been read.
I think people underestimate the meanings of books sometimes. Sure, anyone can write a book if they have enough determination, but it won't become it's own until you have people interested and starting to go into your own fantasy. That's what people don't understand. Everyone thinks books don't matter and that anyone can write one, but that's not how it works. Basically anyone can write words and a story set, but rarely can anyone pull off a book.
But it doesn't matter to me anyways, because most authors I dislike. I think it's because they get stuck inside their heads for a little too long and then become selfish and hypocritical. It amazes me though how good the outcomes of those situations are though.
Enough book talk, sometimes I like explaining things to the little voice inside my head which seems to be the only one who listens anymore. If I have a statement, opinion, or I just want to talk, I always can and I'm glad that I can do just that. I'd be a complete source of insanity if otherwise.
I looked up from my book to see the clock striking seven. Justin got home earlier and went into our, well his room and we never really talked. I've been sleeping on the couch because I feel uncomfortable being around Justin for extended periods of time. Quite honestly, I half heartily would rather be staying at Vic's. But I can't go back there, I can't be weak and crawl back to him. Even though I'm shallow and dumb at points, whatever I had to offer, he didn't deserve.
Him and I were like a continues card game. The deals never ended and when all the cards were on the table we restarted the game and here we are. But I'm not playing round three. No matter how much that decent side of me says that I need to straighten things out, I won't do it. There was nothing for me to sort out, right?
He told me we couldn't be together because of Jaime's death, but then magically when he heard that this all was Alena's fault, he changed his mind. I'm not just an object that he can choose whenever he pleases. I don't feel that he's dedicated and that's what hurts the most, the thought of him not devoting himself to me.
Anymore, I'm not mad, I'm just dazed and irritated at the way he uses me. But I'm not being used anymore. Until he's stating that this is a commitment and not some game, I'm not even talking to him.
Tomorrow, I'd need to go out and find myself another job, considering I quit at Starbucks. It makes me sick just thinking about her. The mall would have other jobs to apply for, i'm sure of it. But for now, I just wanted to sit and read, I have no energy because I haven't slept good for past three days. And that's a problem because I need plenty of sleep for warped tour in three days. The weirdest was that I get my cast removed in two days, just one day before warped tour. And I'm just glad it came out as that, because I wouldn't want to walk around with a brace all day.
Getting back into the book, I started to get drowsy and ended falling asleep, which was weird because rarely do I take naps.
---
Still in a sleepy state, I heard the door knob turn and then the door slam shut.
"Justin?" I questioned groggily.
"Sorry to wake you," he said with a chuckle. I shook my head.
"It's okay, why are you home early?"
"The manager let me go home early, he didn't tell me why though."
"Are the employing?"
"Actually, yes we are, do you want me to ask the boss about it?"
"Yes please that'd really help." I was now super happy. I'd finally get to work at Hot Topic, that is if they employ me.
"I'll talk to the boss, it's okay."
"Thank you," I said, standing up and going into the kitchen. That nap made me really hungry.
So I guess I may get a job at Hot Topic and I get to go see bands in two days, things are going perfect here.
---
Vic's POV:
Things are going horrible here. Jaime's gone and it's all because of his old friend and myself. Then, on top of that, I lost Kellin after only two days of dating. I don't blame him for walking away, I shouldn't have broken it off so easily. So now, I was alone in this daunting house on which I felt uncomfortable in. Every night I missed Jaime being here, but I also missed Kellin.
Not being able to talk to Kellin was tearing me apart on the inside right now. He was the one person I needed to talk to and I've ruined it. I've called him, but he never answers and I've left voice mails, but he never calls me back. He's blocked me out and I don't have a good way to contact him. Sure, I could drive there and see him, but he'd get mad and slam the door on me. He isn't at Starbucks anymore and I have no clue where he's working now. All I know is he's going to...warped tour in...two- wait! That's it. Warped tour.
If I go, I could possibly find him and talk to him, right? It may tricky, but I know what his schedule is because he showed me. We were going to go together, but that's not happening now. But as well as I know Kellin, he wouldn't give up those tickets just because he couldn't take me. He'd take Jenna or one of his other friends.
So, that's what I got to do. In two days, I'll go to warped tour, buy the tickets, and find Kellin. Right now, it doesn't matter if he doesn't want to be with me again, all that matters is that he knows how sorry I am and that I don't want to block him out of my life. I was foolish when I said that shit, I didn't mean any of it. It wasn't his fault and I need to let him know that I care.