Only

That night, Tessa piled into James car with him and Paul climbed in with Rich and they headed to Lennon's family home for dinner. Rich and Dan's friendship stretched back for several years, having played some junior hockey together, even rooming together one year. James had met Rich sometime after, when they been were drafted the same year by Dallas, and then played in the minors together.

When he had first said he was going to introduce him to Dan, James hadn't been sure what to think. They had had their own little run in during the playoffs and he knew him by reputation. Turned out that side of Dan only came out off ice when it came to Lennon. Instead, James found the man known as Carbomb to be low key and affable, and someone that could be a great friend.

"This might be bigger than Sid's house," Paul said as they stepped out of the vehicles, he, James, and Tessa marveling at the size of the place.

"Carcillo married way above his pay grade," James added.

"You can't marry above your pay grade," Tessa reprimanded him. "The heart wants what the heart wants."

"Wait until you see Lennon and then tell me that Dan didn't marry up," Rich smirked.

"You're gonna like her Tess," James added. "She's really great."

"You made it! Hi!" A female voice called from the front door, heading towards them with a smile. She was stunning in a simple way. Brown hair flowed loosely past her shoulders and a simple headband of gold leaves circled her head. A flowy brown skirt paired with a simple white sleeveless top and no shoes completed her hippie chic look.

"Lennon Carcillo, meet Tessa Lewis and Paul Martin," Rich introduced them.

"It's so nice to meet y'all," Lennon said, reaching to shake both their hands and then hugging each of them.

"It's nice to meet you too," Tessa smiled. "Your home is beautiful."

"It's my dad's home, not mine. We needed a change of scenery waiting to see what would happen for this year so Dan and I came to visit Louisa and wait it out from here."

"She missed me," Rich smiled knowingly at Tessa. "She likes my butt. Loves me better than Dan too." Tessa giggled at that.

"Your ego knows no bounds, Dicky," Lennon laughed as she motioned for everyone to follow her.

"Preacher tell the truth and it hurt," he replied solemnly.

"That's a DMX song." He shrugged in response as they headed inside.

"Lennon's dad is like the best lawyer in all of Tennessee," James told Tessa and Paul as they walked through the front door.

"James told me that you're a southern girl too, Tessa. You're from Georgia?"

"Born and raised," she replied proudly. "I left home after college and settled in Pittsburgh."

"I left home after college too. I went to Chicago though."

"That's where you met Dan?" Paul inquired politely.

"That's where we met, but not where we fell in love," Dan answered as he joined them in the front hall. "We were friends in Chicago. Falling in love with her happened in LA."

Lennon smiled as she moved to his side. "Don't be fooled by the tough exterior. Dan's a total softie on the inside. Kinda like Rich."

"Told ya she loved me," Rich said in a stage whisper. The two girls laughed at him.

"That was tough luck against the Kings," Paul told Dan. "Would've been nice to have the cup back in the east."

"Would've been really nice to say I was a back to back cup champ just to irritate people," Dan laughed. "No hard feelings on taking the second round though, eh?"

Paul chuckled and held his hand out to shake Dan's. "No hard feelings," he agreed. "You guys wanted it more."

"Maybe this year."

Paul pulled Tessa into his side and smiled. "I've got a good feeling about this year."

"Have you been to Pittsburgh yet?" Tessa asked.

"Not yet," Lennon answered. "We're gonna head there in a couple days. James has already offered to let us stay at his place so we don’t have to be cramped in a hotel with Bubba."

At the sound of his name, a tan French bulldog came screaming around the corner, sitting obdientley at Lennon's feet. She reached down to scratch his head and Tessa turned to Paul, slapping his arm lightly.

"We need a dog."

Paul groaned. "I told you not to get a dog. Now see what you did?" He accused James.

James threw his hands up in surrender. "I wanted a dog. It just so happened that Tessa was available to help me take care of it when we were on the road."

"All I heard about the entire summer after you got traded was how we should get a dog."

"You should get a dog. Then you'll know she'll have something looking out for her when you're gone."

"Thank you, James!" Tessa said sweetly. "See? I told you, Paul. We can get a small dog if you want. Like a dachshund!"

"We're not getting some frou frou dog."

"But we can get a dog?"

He sighed. "Maybe," he relented.

She hugged him and kissed his cheek. "I knew you'd see it my way," she grinned. She turned to Lennon again. "Did James tell you exactly how sparsley furnished his house is?"

Lennon laughed. “I think everyone knows that,” she answered referring the episode of NHL 36 James had taken part in.

“It is exactly as bad as it seemed on TV,” Tessa confirmed.

“At least we’ll be neighbors then, right?”

Tessa smiled. “Right; sisters from the south. And I think I still have James' credit card so I'm sure I can spruce it up a bit before you guys get there."



James' first informal skate with his new teammates before training camp opened was a couple days after Tessa and Paul left for Pittsburgh. He was nervous but quickly put at ease when the guys accepted him as if he had always been there. It helped to have not only Rich but Mike Ribeiro, a former teammate from his days in Dallas to talk to also.

Mike was older than James, older than Paul actually, and married with three kids. He was already playing in Dallas when James had first made the team there, and he had still been there when he was traded to Pittsburgh. He was happy to have another familiar face in a new city with a new team and found himself spending time at the Ribeiro's house as much as he did just hanging out with Rich.

After dinner a few days into training camp, James had his phone in hand as he texted Tessa to check in on her. It had become habit for him to text her every day to make sure everything was good with her pregnancy and they usually spoke every few days, mostly so she could make sure he was taking care of himself and that someone was feeding him.

"You leave a girl behind in Pittsburgh?" Mike asked, interrupting James' thoughts as he smiled at Tessa's text.

"Huh?" he returned, looking up at Mike.

"Did you leave a girl behind? Because you're always texting someone but haven't talked about it. And you smile at your phone, like you did around Katie."

"You remember that?"

"Of course. It was puppy love; very cute."

"This wasn't puppy love."

"So tell me about her then."

"Her name is Tessa. And she lives in Pittsburgh."

"She's your girlfriend?"

"She was, but we broke over the summer."

"You still talk though?"

"We're friends. She's probably one of my best friends to be honest. She knows me well."

"Really? That's interesting, for you I mean. It's not the James that I knew in Dallas at least."

"A lot has changed since Dallas," James smirked.

"Like what? You grow up?"

"Yeah, actually I did. Because of Tessa."

"Tell me more about this Tessa then."

"She was my neighbor, lived in between me and Paul Martin and we started dating. Paul and I both started dating her."

His eyes got big and he leaned forward. "Both?"

James nodded. "She was both our girlfriends. I was in a poly relationship for fifteen months. No one knew I was with her though. The guys knew about her and Paul but we kept the rest a secret. It was tough but I loved her, so it was worth it."

"How does that even work though?"

"With a lot of patience, and a lot of communication," James chuckled. "Seriously though, it wasn't that much different than what you have with Tamara. We had separate relationships with her but we made decisions that affected all of us together. It just kind of worked."

"So what happened then? I mean you seem happy talking about it. Was it because you got traded?"

"No, nothing to do with that. We just reached our end. But she's really happy with Paulie."

"You're okay with that, that they're still together?"

"They're perfect for each other," he smiled. "I'm glad they've got each other. They're getting married and having a baby."

"That's a big leap, don't you think? Dating two guys to marrying one of them?"

"I don't know, maybe, but she's happy so I'm happy."

"It sounds complicated....and more than a little weird."

"To an outsider, sure, I understand that. I think that's why we hid so much for so long from our teammates. It was only in March that we told them and we had been dating for a year then. And then we broke up in June."

"Do your old teammates know? That you broke up I mean."

"Tess and Paul had a welcome back barbecue at their place a few days ago. They told the guys that they're engaged and that we're all still friends. Geno called me, to make sure I was okay. They don't know she's pregnant though."

"Didn't want to throw too much at them, eh?"

James chuckled. "Better to ease that one in at a later date."



Training camp was a blur and before he knew it, it was October, the regular season finally about to start. James got home before Rich and checked the mail after taking Nixon for a walk. He flipped through it as he walked up the driveway and there towards the bottom of the pile was the card. James had been expecting it, waiting for it really.

Save the Date
December 31, 11:30pm

He smiled at the image of Tessa and Paul in Paul’s Minnesota backyard as he unlocked the door and let himself and his dog inside. Scratching Nixon behind the ears, he let him off his leash as the door closed behind them. Making his way into the kitchen, he pinned the card in the center of the fridge and smiled fondly at it.

Receiving the card made it all very real. James didn't hold out any hope that Tess and he might reconcile. He knew she was with the right one of them but still, after sharing over a year of his life with her, he couldn't help but think about if things had been different, what if it were him and not Paul.

James found himself missing her in so many ways since they parted in Minnesota. The sex, of course, that was a given. He had never been with a woman like he had been with her. The connection was deeper between them and for the first time James understood better when people talked about a spiritual connection with their partner.

It was also all the simple things though. The companionship and the ease of it all. James let Mike’s wife Tamara set him up with a girl she had met shortly after he told him about Tessa but it wasn't the same. He knew he was still so used to Tessa and Paul and sharing his life with the both of them that it would take time but he'd get there, eventually.

"Looks like it's just you and me, Nixon," James said as he settled onto the couch as his dog jumped up beside him. He barked in response, nudging him with his nose.

"Yep; me, you and the great city of Nashville."