Love Buzz
Phone Conversation
I woke up the next morning already pumped with adrenaline; this was the day. This was the day that I tell Kurt how I feel about him once and for all, after weeks of torture and agony. I was wearing essence of stupidity as a cologne, and nothing could stop me.
Except for the fact that I still needed to talk to him alone. That was already a budding problem, as Courtney would be hard to separate from Kurt. I frowned as I stepped into the shower, shaking my head. ‘Think happy thoughts, Dave, think happy thoughts.’
I let the water wash over me as I ran shampoo coated fingers through my hair. I couldn’t help but think ‘What am I going to say when I do get him alone? What if I can’t say anything? I’m gonna choke when it really counts.’ I winced as I massaged my scalp, trying to wash my hair and also forget about Kurt for at least five minutes. I hurry up and wash the rest of me before stepping out of the shower to face the day (and also to get dressed).
After I hastily threw on an outfit, I sat down on the couch to watch T.V. and clear my mind. I flipped through the channels, not really watching anything, but suddenly, I stopped on Jerry Springer, not because I liked the show, but because I had an idea. Putting the T.V. remote down, I leaned forward and took my cell phone out of my pocket. I stared at it, turning it over in my hands. I could call Kurt…maybe ask him to come around…or meet him somewhere. I glanced over the big, bulky phone that could possibly change my life. I shook my head and put it back into my pocket. Or not.
I attempted to pay attention to Jerry Springer, which at that moment showed two girls bitch fighting over a guy. How predictable…but then again, that could be unknowingly me and Courtney fighting over Kurt. I shook my head and rubbed my eyes. I have to get this Kurt business settled out, or it would turn into a very big problem. I pulled my phone back out, hesitating. Should I call him? What’s the worst that could happen on the phone? He could hang up on me and never speak to me again unless it’s for Nirvana, but that’s about it. A small price to pay. Should I take the risk? I took a deep breath and turned the phone on, carefully punching in the numbers that held my fate, or something deep and prophetic like that.
Ring.
Ring.
Ring.
I held my breath as the phone rang without an answer. Maybe he was busy? Doing what, I didn’t know; it was a Saturday, after all. Suddenly, unpleasant images entered my brain of a certain Kurt and Courtney, and I did my best to shut them out. I doubt they were doing that this early in the morning. He was probably asleep or something.
“Hello,” A gruff, annoyed voice sounded on the edge of the phone. My voice caught in my throat, so I cleared my throat very loudly. What was wrong with me? This was my best friend I was talking to, not a hot girl. But my best friend was a hot guy…SHUT UP BRAIN.
“Hi,” I said weakly, hoping that Kurt wouldn’t bite my head off for disturbing him. Kurt wasn’t the happiest person when he was disturbed from his sleep. I of all people (besides Krist and Pat) should know this…now I regretted calling.
“Hey,” Kurt’s tone brightened tenfold right after I had greeted him. “How are you, man?”
I was taken aback by his sudden mood change, but I didn’t let that stop me from smiling until my face almost split. A second of silence passed as I regrouped my brain to think of something smart to say.
“I’m alright,” I reply, starting off slowly. “Um…I kind of have something to tell you…”
“Okay, but hold on, Courtney’s calling for something,” Kurt said back as my heart pounded double time. I was actually going to do it! I was going to tell Kurt Cobain how I felt and hope to God that he wouldn’t hate me for it. Now that I think about it, I don’t think he would; he always said he wanted to be gay so he could piss people off. I held my breath as Kurt talked to Courtney, waiting for him to be done with her so I could tell him the thing that had been harboring my mind for weeks now.
“Hey, man, I’m sorry,” Kurt came back to the phone after about 20 seconds “I gotta go, Courtney wants to drag me somewhere. Tell me later, ok?”
Everything I was about to say just kind of fell out of my mouth in a gush of air with no words in it. I was more than annoyed that Courtney had to come into the picture and ruin everything I was about to tell Kurt. It was the right timing, the right setting, and she goes and trashes it. Thanks, Courtney. Really, thanks.
“Alright,” I say back, containing my fury for his wife and keeping my voice calm. “Talk to you sometime.”
“Bye,” Kurt said apologetically as I heard the phone disconnect. I hung up and threw the phone down on the couch, irritated that I couldn’t get this done and over with.
“Damnit!”
Except for the fact that I still needed to talk to him alone. That was already a budding problem, as Courtney would be hard to separate from Kurt. I frowned as I stepped into the shower, shaking my head. ‘Think happy thoughts, Dave, think happy thoughts.’
I let the water wash over me as I ran shampoo coated fingers through my hair. I couldn’t help but think ‘What am I going to say when I do get him alone? What if I can’t say anything? I’m gonna choke when it really counts.’ I winced as I massaged my scalp, trying to wash my hair and also forget about Kurt for at least five minutes. I hurry up and wash the rest of me before stepping out of the shower to face the day (and also to get dressed).
After I hastily threw on an outfit, I sat down on the couch to watch T.V. and clear my mind. I flipped through the channels, not really watching anything, but suddenly, I stopped on Jerry Springer, not because I liked the show, but because I had an idea. Putting the T.V. remote down, I leaned forward and took my cell phone out of my pocket. I stared at it, turning it over in my hands. I could call Kurt…maybe ask him to come around…or meet him somewhere. I glanced over the big, bulky phone that could possibly change my life. I shook my head and put it back into my pocket. Or not.
I attempted to pay attention to Jerry Springer, which at that moment showed two girls bitch fighting over a guy. How predictable…but then again, that could be unknowingly me and Courtney fighting over Kurt. I shook my head and rubbed my eyes. I have to get this Kurt business settled out, or it would turn into a very big problem. I pulled my phone back out, hesitating. Should I call him? What’s the worst that could happen on the phone? He could hang up on me and never speak to me again unless it’s for Nirvana, but that’s about it. A small price to pay. Should I take the risk? I took a deep breath and turned the phone on, carefully punching in the numbers that held my fate, or something deep and prophetic like that.
Ring.
Ring.
Ring.
I held my breath as the phone rang without an answer. Maybe he was busy? Doing what, I didn’t know; it was a Saturday, after all. Suddenly, unpleasant images entered my brain of a certain Kurt and Courtney, and I did my best to shut them out. I doubt they were doing that this early in the morning. He was probably asleep or something.
“Hello,” A gruff, annoyed voice sounded on the edge of the phone. My voice caught in my throat, so I cleared my throat very loudly. What was wrong with me? This was my best friend I was talking to, not a hot girl. But my best friend was a hot guy…SHUT UP BRAIN.
“Hi,” I said weakly, hoping that Kurt wouldn’t bite my head off for disturbing him. Kurt wasn’t the happiest person when he was disturbed from his sleep. I of all people (besides Krist and Pat) should know this…now I regretted calling.
“Hey,” Kurt’s tone brightened tenfold right after I had greeted him. “How are you, man?”
I was taken aback by his sudden mood change, but I didn’t let that stop me from smiling until my face almost split. A second of silence passed as I regrouped my brain to think of something smart to say.
“I’m alright,” I reply, starting off slowly. “Um…I kind of have something to tell you…”
“Okay, but hold on, Courtney’s calling for something,” Kurt said back as my heart pounded double time. I was actually going to do it! I was going to tell Kurt Cobain how I felt and hope to God that he wouldn’t hate me for it. Now that I think about it, I don’t think he would; he always said he wanted to be gay so he could piss people off. I held my breath as Kurt talked to Courtney, waiting for him to be done with her so I could tell him the thing that had been harboring my mind for weeks now.
“Hey, man, I’m sorry,” Kurt came back to the phone after about 20 seconds “I gotta go, Courtney wants to drag me somewhere. Tell me later, ok?”
Everything I was about to say just kind of fell out of my mouth in a gush of air with no words in it. I was more than annoyed that Courtney had to come into the picture and ruin everything I was about to tell Kurt. It was the right timing, the right setting, and she goes and trashes it. Thanks, Courtney. Really, thanks.
“Alright,” I say back, containing my fury for his wife and keeping my voice calm. “Talk to you sometime.”
“Bye,” Kurt said apologetically as I heard the phone disconnect. I hung up and threw the phone down on the couch, irritated that I couldn’t get this done and over with.
“Damnit!”