Status: [COMPLETE]
Hold Your Breath
Chapter Thirteen
The morning light shone brightly through the blinds of my window. It was unnaturally bright for it to be morning still. I opened my eyes to look at the bright red numbers. 12:30 pm. Wow, that's the longest I had ever slept in. The first thought that hit my mind was work. I was late. I started to slid out of bed when I felt something restrain me. There was an arm around my middle. I stared astonished at the offending arm and followed it towards its owner. MY mouth dropped to the floor.
A boy with messy brown hair snored lightly next to me. His cheek lay on my pillow, squishing his milk skin. My heart skipped a beat. Ryan Ross and I were in bed together? Slowly, my mind began to recall the events of last night. Ryan's eyes opened lazily as he yawned.
"Morning," he said still not completely awake.
I couldn't find the right words to describe how I was feeling, "Did we..."
Ryan looked at me with those big brown eyes of his, "Yeah...."
"Oh," I said my heart faltering.
"Why, did I do something wrong?" he asked worriedly.
"Why did we do that?" I asked in a small weakening voice, "You and I both knew that Mike and I-"
"I know," Ryan interrupted.
"Then why?"
Ryan broke his gaze away from me and sat up, staring blankly at my white comforter. My breath was unsteady and tears threatened to fall. But why? I didn't understand why. If anything I should have been steaming with anger not breaking down in tears. Ryan had used me but the thing was... I don't know why that wasn't as upsetting as I thought it would have been.
"Vic," Ryan said catching my teary gaze. I looked at him waiting for an answer. He sighed, "It's just that I've never felt this way about anyone before. I mean, talk about cliche but I really have never felt so strongly about someone the way I feel for you. Why do you think I stayed here in Lemon Grove for so long? Brendon left for LA weeks ago but I'm still here. Haven't you ever thought about it? What was keeping me here for so long?"
I looked away from his feeling ashamed but not sure why, "I... I-I can't... I can't do this right now Ryan."
He looked at me sadly. I could feel his broken spirit; it was all around the room and the awkward air choked me with it.
"I'm going to go to work now," I said in the best calm voice I could muster up, "And when I come home. You'll be in LA and we'll forget this ever happened. It was just a mistake."
Ryan watched me sadly as I got up and changed into clothes. I grabbed my bag and gave him one more gaze before completely closing my door. Hurriedly, I exited my home and sat in the car. Then I cried. I screamed at myself and cried tears longer than a river. I had no idea why I was crying but it didn't stop me from choking on tears and screaming my heart out. When I had calmed down a little I started my engine and backed out my drive way.
[Ryan's POV]
I stared at the door, wishing she would come back and take back everything. But she didn't. The slam of the front door only confirmed her departure. Her car didn't sound until ten minutes later. Maybe she was contemplating coming back. But when that car engine started... it was all over for both of us.
Laying back down on her bed, I placed her pillow on my face and cried quietly. Why didn't she want me? She didn't want me here any more. "You'll be in LA and we'll forget this ever happened". Those were far from the words that I had wanted to hear. Mike didn't deserve a girl like her. Getting off her bed, I changed into my clothes.
Would it really be that simple to forget her? Sitting in my car, I pondered this thought. It would be so difficult. Going to LA and leaving Lemon Grove would leave an empty groove in my heart. It would be like leaving part of me here. I started my engine and drove away from the one place where I felt complete.
"RYAN!" Brendon squealed as I stepped into Pete's LA home. He ran up to me with a big smile on his face, "So where is she? When's the wedding?"
I looked at Brendon with a miserable expression on my face. He looked at me, his face almost matching my own, "Oh..." he said, "Funeral?"
"She doesn't want me," I choked out, falling onto a couch.
Brendon took in my disheveled appearance, "She chose him instead?"
"Yeah," I said with my strangled voice.
"It's OK," he said reassuringly, "Write it out."
"Not now," I said getting up and walking to a guest room to sleep.
[Vic's POV]
"Victoria? Can I speak to you?" my boss, Francine, asked.
I put down the wood blocks that David and I had been playing with, telling him I'd be right back. The day-care I worked at every Saturday was my favorite part of my week. I always came full of enthusiasm and energy to entertain young children with. But today was different.
"Yes, Francine?" I asked.
"Are you OK, dear? You look a little somber," she asked concerned.
I respected Francine greatly. She wasn't like regular bosses whom all their employees were often intimidated by or scared of. Francine was the most caring and respectable person I knew. She also was the next best thing I had to a friend at work. We were the only two who worked on the weekend. The other day care employees worked during the week when I had school.
"Yeah," I lied, "Just a little trouble at home."
"You sure? I don't mind if you take the day off or anything. Lord knows you deserve one," she said smiling warmly at me.
"It's really OK, Francine," I insisted, "I'll be fine."
She looked at disbelievingly, "OK, Vic. Only you know how you really feel."
"Yeah, I'll be fine," I lied.
A boy with messy brown hair snored lightly next to me. His cheek lay on my pillow, squishing his milk skin. My heart skipped a beat. Ryan Ross and I were in bed together? Slowly, my mind began to recall the events of last night. Ryan's eyes opened lazily as he yawned.
"Morning," he said still not completely awake.
I couldn't find the right words to describe how I was feeling, "Did we..."
Ryan looked at me with those big brown eyes of his, "Yeah...."
"Oh," I said my heart faltering.
"Why, did I do something wrong?" he asked worriedly.
"Why did we do that?" I asked in a small weakening voice, "You and I both knew that Mike and I-"
"I know," Ryan interrupted.
"Then why?"
Ryan broke his gaze away from me and sat up, staring blankly at my white comforter. My breath was unsteady and tears threatened to fall. But why? I didn't understand why. If anything I should have been steaming with anger not breaking down in tears. Ryan had used me but the thing was... I don't know why that wasn't as upsetting as I thought it would have been.
"Vic," Ryan said catching my teary gaze. I looked at him waiting for an answer. He sighed, "It's just that I've never felt this way about anyone before. I mean, talk about cliche but I really have never felt so strongly about someone the way I feel for you. Why do you think I stayed here in Lemon Grove for so long? Brendon left for LA weeks ago but I'm still here. Haven't you ever thought about it? What was keeping me here for so long?"
I looked away from his feeling ashamed but not sure why, "I... I-I can't... I can't do this right now Ryan."
He looked at me sadly. I could feel his broken spirit; it was all around the room and the awkward air choked me with it.
"I'm going to go to work now," I said in the best calm voice I could muster up, "And when I come home. You'll be in LA and we'll forget this ever happened. It was just a mistake."
Ryan watched me sadly as I got up and changed into clothes. I grabbed my bag and gave him one more gaze before completely closing my door. Hurriedly, I exited my home and sat in the car. Then I cried. I screamed at myself and cried tears longer than a river. I had no idea why I was crying but it didn't stop me from choking on tears and screaming my heart out. When I had calmed down a little I started my engine and backed out my drive way.
[Ryan's POV]
I stared at the door, wishing she would come back and take back everything. But she didn't. The slam of the front door only confirmed her departure. Her car didn't sound until ten minutes later. Maybe she was contemplating coming back. But when that car engine started... it was all over for both of us.
Laying back down on her bed, I placed her pillow on my face and cried quietly. Why didn't she want me? She didn't want me here any more. "You'll be in LA and we'll forget this ever happened". Those were far from the words that I had wanted to hear. Mike didn't deserve a girl like her. Getting off her bed, I changed into my clothes.
Would it really be that simple to forget her? Sitting in my car, I pondered this thought. It would be so difficult. Going to LA and leaving Lemon Grove would leave an empty groove in my heart. It would be like leaving part of me here. I started my engine and drove away from the one place where I felt complete.
"RYAN!" Brendon squealed as I stepped into Pete's LA home. He ran up to me with a big smile on his face, "So where is she? When's the wedding?"
I looked at Brendon with a miserable expression on my face. He looked at me, his face almost matching my own, "Oh..." he said, "Funeral?"
"She doesn't want me," I choked out, falling onto a couch.
Brendon took in my disheveled appearance, "She chose him instead?"
"Yeah," I said with my strangled voice.
"It's OK," he said reassuringly, "Write it out."
"Not now," I said getting up and walking to a guest room to sleep.
[Vic's POV]
"Victoria? Can I speak to you?" my boss, Francine, asked.
I put down the wood blocks that David and I had been playing with, telling him I'd be right back. The day-care I worked at every Saturday was my favorite part of my week. I always came full of enthusiasm and energy to entertain young children with. But today was different.
"Yes, Francine?" I asked.
"Are you OK, dear? You look a little somber," she asked concerned.
I respected Francine greatly. She wasn't like regular bosses whom all their employees were often intimidated by or scared of. Francine was the most caring and respectable person I knew. She also was the next best thing I had to a friend at work. We were the only two who worked on the weekend. The other day care employees worked during the week when I had school.
"Yeah," I lied, "Just a little trouble at home."
"You sure? I don't mind if you take the day off or anything. Lord knows you deserve one," she said smiling warmly at me.
"It's really OK, Francine," I insisted, "I'll be fine."
She looked at disbelievingly, "OK, Vic. Only you know how you really feel."
"Yeah, I'll be fine," I lied.