Hold Your Breath

Bursting through the front door, I threw my coat onto the couch and stormed towards my room. My whole family was in the living room watching the whole scene that I had made with my entrance. Didn't they have anything better to do than be outsiders watching my life crumble.

I slammed my bedroom door hard, making Tortoise shrivel into a ball.

"I don't get it Tort!" I screamed in frustration, "I just don't get it. Mike and I had an almost perfect relationship not a few months ago and now... not it's...it's... I don't know what it is but it's making me crazy!"

Tortoise gave a small meow but stayed in his ball. I walked over to my bed and sat on the edge of it.

"I mean, is a little attention too much to ask for? He's with his stupid band more than he is with me! I mean honest to...UGH!"

Tortoise jumped onto my bed and rubbed his head against my side. I gazed down at him with a pout on my face. Cupping him in my palms, I lifted him so we were eye level to one another, "You won't leave me, right Tort?"

He gave another soft meow and I sighed, "Maybe I'm just PMSing. I've been so out of it ever since..."

I let the sentence trail off and my mind wandered off back to that night. Tortoise purred sweetly into my stomach. He jumped off of me when someone knocked on my door.

"Vic," my mother said poking her head through my door, "You've got mail."

"Who's it from?" I asked getting up and walking towards her.

My mother beamed at me and stepped fully into the room showing me an envelope... a big heavy envelope with a very big name. I almost fainted... instead, I screamed in delight and ripped the letter out of her hand. I tore through the envelope in excitement and pulled out the paper on top.

The first line read: "Brittany Victoria Grant, I'd like to be the first to congratulate you on your acceptance to Harvard University."

I looked up at my mom who now had my entire family behind her, watching me with smiles. My heart was pounding in excitement. My life's dream... it was finally accomplished! I jumped up and down and screamed in delight, hugging my mom then the rest of my family. A chorus of 'Congratulations' and 'I'm so proud of you!' resounded throughout my room.

"Oh my gosh!" I said, "I'm so... I don't know what I am. I'm so incredibly happy and relieved and crazy. I'm so many things. Oh my G- I need to call Ryan and tell him everything." I reached into my pocket and started to look through my contacts.

My whole family froze and went quiet. I looked up and stared at them questioningly, "What?"

"Ryan?" My mother asked confused.

Oh shit...

"Ryan?" I covered up, "I said Mike."

"No, I heard Ryan," Uncle Phil said bemusedly.

"Yeah me too," the others chorused.

They always had to gang up on me like that. I took a deep intake of oxygen.

"I'd like to be alone," I announced.

They left and my phone buzzed in my pocket. I took it out and saw a new text message from Mike.

Hey, I'm sorry about today, I really am. I can't believe that I was such an inconsiderate jerk. But I have GREAT news that will make you scream your head off. Can we talk?

Well, I guess now was a better time than never to tell Mike.

It's OK. I was PMSing. Yeah, let's meet in the park. You know, like old times.

The park, I thought to myself. It had been a long time since I had been there. It saddened me to think that going back their with Mike would never be like it was before. I think I sort of like the idea of Mike being the unattainable boy friend, when we were just best friends. It made liking him and be friends all the more intriguing. But now that I had him... it just wasn't the same.

The wind danced serenely through the leaves in the trees. It was a cloudy day. I wouldn't have been surprised if it started to rain while we were here. Mike and I walked hand in hand over to the swing set where we used to sit through out our middle school years and just talked. We never had to do anything but talk. I sat down in my swing and Mike took his place next to me. Gently, we swung with the breeze. I kicked at the sand below us and watched as it landed elsewhere.

"Do remember back when in 7th grade we sat here after I had gotten into a fight with Bobby MacArthur?" Mike asked out of the blue.

I smiled recalling the memory and nodded, "Yeah, you had a black eye."

Mike laughed, "Yeah well. You remember why we had gotten into a fight?"

"No, but it had to do something with me I think,"

"He called you a 'slut' in front of me. I told him that his mouth was as big as his stomach and the punches flew," Mike said looking over at me for my reaction.

I smiled at the ground, "I remember now. Do you remember the night of the eight grade dance, when we came here after wards?"

"You mean when I chased you out of the gym? Then yeah, I remember."

I laughed, "I was so upset that you went to the dance with Rachel Collins and when I heard her in the bathroom bragging about you as her date. I lost it and told her off."

"Really?"

"Yeah, that's why I was so shocked you followed me out to the park when Rachel was still at the dance,"

"Of course I followed you, I was in love with you," Mike said smiling and reaching out for my hand.

I took his hand in his and we let the wind swing us. A peaceful silence settled on us, neither of us saying what we had meant to say in coming here. I guess, looking back on it now, both our news was good and bad for our relationship.

"Do you want to go first?" Mike asked a little while later, softly.

I looked at him, "I got in."

His head snapped up towards my gaze with a huge smile, "That's great, Vic! You've always wanted it and now it's happening! Congratulations, babe."

He kissed my cheek and smiled back at him, "What's your good news?"

Mike's face grew brighter, if at all possible, "Our band's getting signed."

My face was a mix of 'are-you-serious?' and 'omg-its-finally-happening!' I hugged Mike and kissed him sweetly.

"That's great, Mike. I can't wa-"

"That's not the best part though," he said hurriedly.

I tilted my head to the side, "What then?"

"We're going on tour..."

"That's gre-"

"This summer."

I frowned, "But that means we won't be together before I go off to Harvard."

Mike's face fell as he realized this, "When were you planning on leaving?"

"Late July."

His face fell, "We're touring late May to August."

"Mike, graduation is in June," I reminded him.

What was Mike thinking? He needed to get his high school diploma at least. Everything was going terribly wrong terribly quickly. I looked at Mike with a concerned expression.

"I know. I'll graduate, I just won't be there for the ceremony."

"Mike this is ridiculous. You can't possib-"

"Go on tour with us!" Mike said quickly.

I thought about it for a second, almost considering it, but my common sense got the better of me, "Mike, I want to walk down that aisle for graduation."

Mike screwed his face up deep in concentration, "Well... you could go to graduation... I'll buy you a ticket to fly out wherever we happen to be after graduation... and I'll buy you a ticket to Boston."

"Well... I guess that might work..."

"Please, Vic," Mike pleaded, "It might be our last time to actually spend time together before you go off to Harvard."

And reluctantly I said, "OK."