Annabel Lee

Annabelle’s Point of View

…

“No!” I screamed, my hair whipping me in the wind. No matter how hard I tried to rip myself away, I couldn’t get an inch. My mother smiled at me as I hadn’t seen her smile in years.



“Uh!” I croaked as a Gryffindor girl pegged me in the back of the head with her school bag as she walked by my desk.

“Whoops,” she mocked with two of her friends, strolling out of the classroom laughing. Regaining my composure, I packed up my notebook and avoided eye contact with Professor Flitwick as I left the Charms classroom. Once I was in the hallway I took a deep breath and wiped the cold sweat from my brow. It had been the fourth time that week I’d had that nightmare. And now it was beginning to invade my daydreaming.

Keep it together, Annie.

Two boys in Slytherin robes joined me as I made my way down the Grand Staircase. I recognized the two from being at the party.

“Do you think Pettigrew will cry?” I heard the shorter one cackle, slinging his school bag over his left shoulder. I recognized him as Avery.

“If he isn’t too busy pissing himself, you mean?” he asked darkly and I bit my lip. That was Rodolphus Lestrange. Reminded of Severus’s warning to keep away from him, I began walking at a slightly quicker pace.

“If we’re lucky enough, he’ll make a trail to help us find him,” Avery laughed loudly, his footsteps just at my heels.

Was he keeping pace with me on purpose?

“It’ll be even luckier if it leads us to that Mudblood he always hides behind,” Rodolphus countered, his sentence stretched out with every taunt word.

“Ah!” I gasped as the staircase switched directions, causing me to loose my footing. Just as I braced myself on the hard marble steps, I felt a set of arms catch me.

“Too busy daydreaming to watch your step, Annabelle?” Avery asked with a lighter tone than I was accustomed to from him. I snapped my arm away from him, wary of his touch. I was taken aback to realize he had helped me. His reputation for being a ruthless genius was well known. In my third year I’d seen him hex Finley Nimmix every day for a month for saying he should have been in Ravenclaw.

“Thank you,” I whispered grabbing my schoolbag from the floor. With how fast he had caught me, I wondered if he had known I was there the whole time. He wouldn’t have done that for another house. Maybe he had seen the green on my robes.

“More like she was too busy eavesdropping,” I heard Rodolphus mumble haughtily and I made my way briskly down the rest of the steps.

“Wait!” Avery shouted and, uneasy with what he might do if I ignored him, I waited patiently just a few steps off the stairs. I was met with a surprising grin. “How have you been?” he muttered under his breath courteously and I couldn’t help but tilt my head.

“Fine… thank you,” I whispered. What was the point of his pleasantry? He shifted his shoulder uncomfortably and he cleared his throat. I reminded me a lot of what Severus…

“I’ve heard Dumbledore’s been watching you like a hawk these past few weeks,” he said matter-of-factly and began leading me towards the Great Hall with him. I merely nodded and kept my eyes on the ground. “He does that for most new recruits. Once whatever he is suspecting you of clears up, we would be happy to have you back at the meetings. Excited for next week’s—?“

“Annie!” Cissa chimed from behind us as she looked between Avery and I. “I thought we were meeting in the Library to study. Sorry Avery, I’ve got to steal the little brainiac,” Narcissa smiled placing her hand on my shoulder. Before Avery or Lestrange could say anything, I was halfway down the corridor in the middle of a brisk-job towards the grand courtyard.

“Thanks,” I mumbled with a short laugh. In all honesty, I hadn't expected her to help me either. Since I'd gotten the letter, I hadn't been up to spending time with anyone and had been hiding away in the library most days. I was afraid she was upset with me for ignoring her attempts to spend time together. To my dismay, once we were away from the boys her sweet facade faded. Slamming open the front doors, she nearly left me in the corridor as she stomped her way to a secluded bench and threw her bag down on the cobblestones. “Um... Cissa? Are you okay?”

“Peachy,” she hissed with her a curled lip as she flopped down onto the stone seat. An unlucky group of second-years playing passing by turned their heads to watch Narcissa's tantrum, but with one fierce glare they turned their heads back and quickly made their way in the other direction. A little queasy, I approached her and knelt down to pick up her bag.

“Are you upset with me?” I asked quietly so that other's passing by couldn't hear. Her frustrated expression perked into one of confusion.

“With you?” she asked staring down at me, and I was pleased to see that she had no anger left in her. In fact, her expression fell even further as her eyes began to well. “Oh Merlin, don't look at me like that,” she begged as as she tried to wipe away any forming tears. For the first time, I noticed her clutching a scroll of parchment in her right hand. When I held out my hands for it she gently placed it in them.

“Not even Acceptable this time,” she murmured, laying her head in her hands. Cissa was much smarter than she let on to others. Though many didn't know it, she had E's on a number of her O.W.L.'s her fifth year, and even an O in History of Magic.

But at the top of this essay was a large, deliberate P.

“I'm going to get a howler for sure,” she moaned, her voice muffled through her arms. With only minor hesitation, I reached up and put a hand on her knee. “I mean really,” she began, turning her head to look at me, “what self-respecting witch uses Arithmancy anyways, right?”

“It'll be okay Cissa,” I said pulled myself next to her on the bench. “It's not like it was a Dreadful or Troll.”

“My parents won't see it that way,” she sighed and tucked her hair behind her ears, showing off her sharp cheekbones that were painted with a light flush from crying. Even when like this, she truly was one of the most beautiful witches I'd ever met.

“How can I help?”

“Unless you've got a way to make this grade disappear, I don't see how,” she moaned. “Do you think we could go back to studying after dinner again?” I instantly felt a pang of guilt. Had I not been avoiding her, I would have been helping her with her studies and maybe she wouldn't have gotten this P.

“Of course.” I said looking down into my lap. I'd been selfish, and with one of my only friends at that. As I looked back up, I noticed Professor Flitwick taking a stroll with a particular Arithmancy teacher, Professor Tuth.

Perfect. Grinning, I held up a finger to Narcissa and jumped up from my seat next to her. Following my line of sight, she stiffened.

“Annie!” she hissed, but I was already off. The professors seemed to be enjoying a lighthearted discussion on their way towards Care of Magical Creatures grounds when I reached them.

“Excuse me,” I said, a bit louder than my usual tone, and when they saw me their eyes seemed to seemed to betray any sort of professionalism.

“Miss Emaciare,” Professor Flitwick said with a surprised tone. “Can we help you from some trouble?” he asked purposefully. Professor Tuth's eyebrows were slightly raised as he stared at her.

“I...” I started, choking down the embarrassed blush that was making my head begin to spin. “No, Sir. I just wanted... Profess Tuth, if I might ask you--”

“No,” Professor Tuth said shaking his head and I half-jumped in surprise at his curt tone.

“Rupert,” Professor Flitwick whispered, looking almost embarrassed for me at his colleague's response. “At least let the poor girl finish--”

“You want to ask for some help for your friend Miss Black's grade she received today, correct?” Professor Tuth asked knowingly, his head nodding in the direction of Narcissa behind me. Deductive and to the point, I expected nothing else from a professor who taught numbers as absolute truth. Professor Flitwick followed his gaze and I shook my head.

“I wanted to apologize.”

“You, apologize?”

“I have had some... personal problems... that Narcissa has been helping me handle.” I sent a purposefully pained and embarrassed look towards Professor Flitwick. “I'm very grateful to her, but it seems I've been pulling her from her studies.” Though Professor Flitwick's gaze softened, Profess Tuth's did not. In fact, his posture seemed to straighten quite a bit.

“I'm sorry, but it is Miss Black's responsibility to balance her personal and academic life. It is not yours, and it is certainly not mine,” Professor Tuth said and took a step to begin walking. Disregarding any self of self-preservation I had left, I took a step with him.

“Please,” I began, but faltered under his stare and stopped, looking down at my shoes. “Sir,” I squeaked. “If it should be anyone's grade, it should be mine. I'm responsible for it after all.”

“If I recall you got an E on your last essay, an enlightening take on the popular uses on numerology. What would you have me do, replace your grade with hers, and hers with yours?” he chided.

“Professor Tuth--” Professor Flitwick began to scold.

“If you'd find that fitting, Sir,” I said humbly, nodding at the two professors. For a moment, Tuth's neutral expression wavered and crossed his arms slowly.

“I've never heard you say more than two words in my classroom, Emaciere,” Professor Tuth stated flatly, as if waiting for me to explain myself. When I just stared at him, he looked towards Professor Flitwik's pleading expression, and gave a long sigh as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “She will turn in a fifteen inch essay, expounding on Sir Henry Fimbleton's use of use of arithmetic in predicting the Bora Comet, no later than 9 o'clock tomorrow morning. Is that understood?” I nodded enthusiastically and smiled at both professors.

“Thank you, Professors,” I chirped and turned on my heals to tell Narcissa, who had been eavesdropping, her seat half hidden behind some bushes, the good news. I plopped down next to her, exhausted and embarrassed, but happy.

“Where did that come from, Annie?” she asked astonished. I took a deep breath to calm myself and then smiled at her.

“You wanted the grade to disappear, right?” Her mouth hanging a bit, she began laughing gleefully.

“Now that was some magic!” she cheered and hugged me quickly. When she pulled away, she took my hand and began pulling me with her back through the Grand Entrance. “Now let me return the favor,” she said with her infamous coy smile. I paled a bit as she seemed darted us through the corridors towards the Great Dining Hall.

“There's no need—”

“Have you ever noticed,” she continued, completely ignoring me, “that our little Snape--” Feeling suddenly sobered, I stopped walking.

“Cissa,” I said stopping her, gently tugging my arm back. She turned back, her eyes still wide with excitement before a look of disappointment settled in. “I'm sorry.... I'm glad... I could help. But....” I said looking down at my shoes. How could I explain to her that I wasn't ready to be around any yet.

Cissa looked at me with a far off look, her eyes lightly pained. She wouldn't let go of my hand slowly, and closed the distance between us.

“I'll be here when you're ready to talk Annie. We're all here for you,” she said and gave my hands a squeeze. I mustered a sad smile and nodded.

“You're too good to me, Cissa,” I whispered and squeezed her hands gently.

Universal Point of View

The Professors watched the Slytherin upperclassman gleefully pull Annabelle back towards the castle, both of them giggling with girlish youth. Next to Professor Flitwick, Professor Tuth gave a heavy sigh and nudged his short friend.

“She played you like a fiddle,” he teased and smirked when the dwarf Charms professor turned red.

“Played me? I think you have the wrong impression of our Miss Emaciare,” he scolded as he watched the girl turn beat red under the whispering ear of Narcissa Black. “She a sweet girl, too innocent for that.”

“Ah, but you underestimate her,” Professor Tuth stated, walking so as to direct them out towards the Care of Magical Creatures garden. “She is cunning, befitting of her Slytherin house. She flashed those sad little eyes at you and you fell for it,” he said plainly and despite an embarrassed scoff from Professor Flitwick, he did not disagree. They watched as the two girls separated, somewhat awkwardly, and went their different ways.

“She deserves a win every now and then, the poor girl,” Professor Flitwick said sadly, before turning to walk with his colleague.

Annabelle's Point of View

Late into the evening, I sat alone on the ground in the Astrological corner of the Library with books piled high around me. I had two scrolls of parchment rolled up to my left, one essay for Divinations and one for D.A.D.A., with another one half completed on my lap for Astronomy. I levitate two books in the air in front of my, trying to find the perfect quote to support my theory on the different roles of Jupiter's moons on the Great Earthquake of 1624 and its subsequent affect on the mermaid population in the Mediterranean.

The great earthquake shall be in the month of May; Saturn, Capricorn, Jupiter, Mercury in Taurus; Venus, also Cancer, Mars in zero. I scratched down the quote in my cursive handwriting until I heard approaching footsteps.

I began to pack my books away. I'd find another section to study in.

“You're not going to find anything I haven't already read a hundred times over,” I heard someone say at a whisper, but in a voice I could never mistake.

Lupin. Of course, it had to be them. Rounding the corner, Lupin rested against a bookshelf looking drained and slightly on edge while his mates tore into the Lunar section. Staying at the far corner of the book aisle, they didn't seem to notice me at first.

“There's got to be something in here on making the affects of your furry little problem less severe,” Potter said pulling a random book out at once. “The Moon and You. That's a start.”

“I think we need something a bit closer to The Moon and Youuuuuu,” Black howled like a wolf reeling his head back, earning a shush form his mates.

Is Lupin a--

In my surprise, I momentarily forgot my levitation charm and my books came crashing to the ground. The trio turned their head and noticed me for the first time. Lupin looked as if he was going to vomit on his shoes, while Black and Potter looked somewhere between horrified and enraged. I noticed their eyes ended up on my wand, which had just been charming my books.

“Snake,” Black hissed taking out his wand and disarming me, my wand flying down the opposite aisle. Leaving my books aside, I tried to get up and run.

“Locomotor Wibbly,” Potter hexed and I felt my legs wobble to the ground.

Hell. Lupin, who stared down at me, was shaking. He picked up the book I was reading: Lunar Magic on Magical Creatures.

“Following in Snivelly's footsteps with all this research, aren't you?” Potter asked as the three stood over me. I shook my head stoically. I had known of Severus's theories about Remus, but had always chalked them up to paranoia.

They were all monsters to him.

“Bull,” Black snapped, but my attention was on Lupin. It was all true though, wasn't it? But all the evidence I needed was right in front of me, with the way Remus stared down at that book. Turning his wild gaze towards me, he raised his wand at me with an aggression I'd only seen form Potter and Black.

“Lunar Magic on Magical Creatures. I'll admit, I've poured over this one myself for weeks,” he said lowly and I tried to maintain my cool composure. Black and Potter, their wands still pointed down at me, turned to their friend.

“Moony, quiet,” Black hissed, the approached me and pushed his wand into my forehead. “A bunch of paranoid freak, the both of you snakes. Of the Marauders you choose to persecute, why do you choose Moony, huh? Out of any of us, he's the only one that defends you, Emaciare.” His words were less taunting than normal, they dripped with true loathing.

“Its for an essay,” I managed to whisper, staring up at Remus, whose wand seemed to shake in his hand. “Check my--”

“Liar,” Black snapped. “We won't even be studying Jupiter for another month. For a Slytherin, you're a bad liar.” Of course they didn't believe me. I was doing my essays in advance, preparing for what would be coming my way in the next month.

Lupin growled, his shoulders shaking. “Can't you and Snape leave me be?” While Black kept his wand on me, Potter turned to Lupin with a hushed tone.

“Moony, you'd got to calm down. You'll get us found.”

“What's the point?” Lupin shook and stepped towards me. “She heard what we said. She's reading the book. No doubt she'll run off and tell everyone.” His eyes were welling up.

“No,” I started and shook my head, but Black shoved his wand harder into my forehead.

“Quiet!” he hissed, but now he was more concerned with watching his normally quiet friend seethe. And for good reason. Lupin looked like he might hunch over and maul me at any moment.

“Breathe with me Moony, this isn't you,” Potter whispered grabbing Lupin's shoulders. Black shoved his wands now instead under my chin and I flinched back. My composure began to deteriorate as Black began invading my personal space. He reached down and grabbed my robes collar, kneeling in front of me. “Moony,” Potter repeated and finally Lupin looked at him, and his animalistic state seemed to subside. His shoulders relaxing, he looked down at his wand, still pointed towards me, and pulled it close to his gut. Potter sighed. “You back with us?”

“Yes,” Lupin gulped and tucked his wand away. “But now...” he trailed off looking at me.

But now what about me. They all seemed to stare a moment, unsure of what to do.

“I'm not sure what you thought you heard, Annie,” Potter said stone serious. “But I'm sure you're just having a spell. You know, I've heard that's typically for people sick like you,” he said waving his wand a bit. Looking at Lupin, who was recoiling into himself, I gulped.

“Not so cocky without your little Death Eater pals around, are you?” Black laughed, close enough for me to feel his breath and I flinched violently. “You know, I ought to repay you for that little shove you have me in the Great Hall. About ten times over.”

“I'm not interested in spreading rumors,” I said quietly, giving a pleading look up at Remus. He stared at me with a similarly desperate gaze.

“And we're supposed to believe you're not going to run off and tell your little boyfriend about all this?” Black said roughly clenching my robes, causing me to shrink. I shook my head in protest.

“Please, let me go,” I pleaded. “What you were talking about, that's no one's business.”

“Pssh, not afraid of magic but Merlin forbid I touch you...” Black dragged mockingly. I was near tears and I closed my eyes and tried to push them back into my head. I just wanted Black to let go of me. He was too close, and God was I pathetic. Slowly, I felt his wand removed from my throat. I opened my eyes to see Potter holding his mate's arm back.

“Remember what Lily said, Padfoot. She'll never forgive us if she finds out it went down like this,” Potter said casting a glance towards me. Black groaned and stepped back. I was left in the corner holding my book bag to my chest.

“We'll be telling Dumbledore, you know, that you know. He'll make you vow not to tell anyone. If you even try to tell anyone, you'll be kicked out of the school, or worse,” Remus said, more to himself than me, and I suddenly felt guilty. He was afraid, more than anything, that he'd be found out. He couldn't even pretend to be angry. I nodded and, slowly so as to not excite any rash reactions from the two still holding wands against me, lifted my bare forearms for them to see.

“I won't tell anyone,” I said with an inflection that might get across to them. Black stared the hardest at my arm.

“Why though?” Lupin asked reaching out to give me my book back. I took it back gingerly and with a sad smile shook my head.

“I'm like you, I have secrets,” I said holding the book close. “You're lucky you have friends who can keep yours.” Potter's face softened just slightly as he looked over to Lupin and Black, who was still staring at my arm

“I have enemies that can keep them too, I supposed,” Lupin said smiling, and held out a hand. Hesitating, I took his hand and stood up. Using Accio, Lupin gave me my wand and I waved my belongings into my bag. Black crossed his arms and finally turned his back on me.

“I guess you're luckier than my brother,” he muttered darkly, and for a moment I thought I saw his anger subside into something else. “Make sure to stay that way,” he muttered darkly and put his wand away. With nothing left to say, the three of them backed away and walked together away towards Dumbledore's Office together, Black and Potter putting and arm around Lupin each.

Lucky. I thought watching Lupin surrounded by his friends. He could rely on them to keep his secret, so why couldn't I? Even the rejection I might get would be better then this loneliness I found myself drowning in it as I watched the three walk away, happy.

I found my feet took me without having to be told, down to the Slytherin dungeon and into Narcissa and mine's room. When I walked in, I saw her lying face down on her bed, her nose just above a scroll of parchment.

“Annie!” she cheered seeing me, but then her face collapsed into shock.

“What?” I asked smiling at her.

“You're—I mean. You look...”she trailed off and I pulled my Slytherin scarf a bit tighter around my neck to hiding any growing bruises form Black's wand. “Happy...” I smiled a bit wider and kneeled in front of her bed, taking her hands into mine.

Narcissa's Point of View

I was caught off guard by Annabelle's sudden physical closeness. She looked as if she was praying at an altar.

“Cissa,” Annie whispered, as she kneeled at my bedside. She looked almost sorry. “If you had a secret, that you couldn't tell anyone, would you trust me with it?” Struck by her question, I moved my essay and quill to the floor.

“Of course, I'd trust you with anything. My life even,” I said quietly. To be honest, I'd never given it much thought, but the answer seemed to at least feel partially true. My answer seemed to give her little comfort, and she sunk further into the floor and pressed her face down into my bedsheets.

“Forgive me, I'm an awful friend,” she said, her body giving small tremors.

“Annie,” I cooed, crawling onto the ground with her and holding her hands. She looked up at me, her head still partially on my bed. Her eyes were wet with tears, but she smiled brightly at me. “Wha's happened? Tell me,” I pleased gently, hoping this might finally bring her out of her shell that she'd put herself in the past couple weeks. Seeing me staring she laughed and wiped away her tears.

“Cissa,” she said quietly, hoarse, and squeezed my hands. “Ask me anything, anything in the world. I'll answer you truthfully,” she whispered and I found myself reflecting her smile.

Could this really be happening? I stared at her wide-eyed. She stared at me expectingly, waiting for a question. And the first thing that came to mind, something that had weighed heavy on my mind for years now, made me embarrassed to ask.

“When you lived... not in your house...” I began and I saw her blush lightly, “did you ever have to... I mean, because you don't let people touch you, is it because you had to... I'm not judging you if you had to...” I added, seeing her innocent expression never change.

“No. I never had to do that,” she whispered shaking her head. Despite her innocence, she knew exactly what I meant, which spoke volumes to me.

“How? How did you manage then?” I asked.

“I lived with women who did,” she said with a smile. “They were kind to me, made sure no one touched me.”

“And even through our first years of school together? Every summer, you went back to that?” I whispered, suddenly hurt. “Why, why not ask to stay with one of us?”

Why not ask for my help? I thought we were close enough for that.

“I was embarrassed to tell you,” she said, her eyes downcast. “I was embarrassed to tell you particularly. How could I? With your family being...” she motioned to my person and I understood. How could she, a half-blood despondent, ask for my help? I put my hand on her knee.

“I would do anything to have help you Annie, no matter what,” I said flatly. She stayed silent mulling what I said over. “I do have another question though,” I said and she looked up. “What you said at the party to the Dark Lord, was it true?” I asked and she reeled back a bit.

“I don't hate muggles,” she whispered and I nearly laughed at her sweet nature.

“No, Annie, that should be obvious,” I said softly and shook my head. “No, I meant about your father. Do you really want to kill him?” I asked and watched as her sweet and beautiful face sunk into a twisted grimace. She said nothing, and I wish I hadn't asked the question. “I'm sorry—”

“No,” she interrupted and cleared her expression of any emotion. “Thank you for asking.... I think, deep down, I might.” I stayed silent at her confession and she looked down, guilty.

Annabelle's Point of View

Looking down, I questioned if now was the time to tell Cissa. I was ready to confess everything to her. About my mother, about why I lived on the streets, about the letter. If Lupin could rely on Black and Potter, couldn't I at least rely on Cissa to keep my secrets?

“That filthy muggle would deserve it,” Cissa sneered, and I looked up at her to see her eyes filled with hate. My heart shattered as her smile grew sincere and sinister. “Just you wait Annie, the Dark Lord has his plans for getting rid of people like him. To think he found himself better than a witch like your mother. Superior enough to hurt a witch like your mother or you. He'll find out soon enough how small his people are,” she grinned and I found myself staring at her.

I could never tell her. She new just a minor part of my secrets, and with it she had a dark, supremacist perspective of things.

Even if she was my friend, she would always first and foremost be a Black. Crestfallen, I tried my best to smile gratefully at her and put my forehead to her hands penatantly.

“Thank you, Cissa,” I whispered. She seemed to believe my words as she removed a hand and pat my head.

“Anything for you, sweetie,” she cooed and pulled me up and over to her bed. “Now, let's get cracking on the finishing touches of this essay, shall me?” she cheered and unrolled the parchment she'd been writing on. “Would you mind reviewing it?” I smiled for her and wordless took the essay in my hands.

Even a shallow friendship had to be worth something.