Status: updates weekly at least c:

Hearts & Spades

chapter eighteen : can i be the one you always need...

Silence was never really a noise that bothered Alex, being surrounded by nothing more than the sound of the wooden floors creaking beneath him, created a comforting and nearly serene atmosphere. The young boy had spent most of his life alone, locked behind the doors of that house, he had grown accustom to it. But today was a bit different, the brunette had been awake for far longer than he would admit to himself. And why would a teenager go past his best interest to rise when the sun did? Because, Alex was watching the news with his parents last night when he heard the man on the television mention a winter storm, and his eyes lit up like a small child. Snow wasn't anything new to Baltimore, yet he couldn't even count five things he found more gorgeous than watching the flakes dance through the air and to the ground.

It was nearly eight o'clock, the rest of the Gaskarth family were fast asleep on the second floor. All but the excitable son who sat criss-cross on the carpeted floor of the living room, gaze focused out the back door. He was thankful for the warmth provided by the nearby fireplace, as well as his pajama pants that were far too long and his boyfriend's large hoodie. With a steamy mug of hot chocolate cupped in his palms, there was only one thing that could make this morning more perfect. And that was Jack. The two boys had been texting non-stop, as usual. Alex had fallen asleep first, when a half hour pasted without him replying to the elder's text, Jack caught on. So when he raced to awake and catch a glimpse of the snow, the screen of his phone was coated with a huge message from said boy sent not too long after he fell victim to exhaustion.

♠ ♠ ♠


From: Darling - 10:53 p.m
Did you seriously fall asleep again?

From: Darling - 10:55 p.m
You're never going to win if you keep passing out before midnight

From: Darling - 10:59 p.m
Guess it's that time again, prepare to witness the best boyfriend in the world

From: Darling - 11:11 p.m
Babe, I want you to know that I am absolutely crazy about you. Like, I can't even put it into words, but then again, I've never been good with words. We've been together for months, and these have been possibly the best months of my life, despite all the obstacles in our way. I remember our first kiss, how I couldn't believe that someone like you could ever even look twice in my direction. I still feel like my legs will collapse from underneath me when you're around me, I know there are still times when my voice shakes and I never go home from a day with you without my cheeks aching from the constant smile you keep on my face. Alexander William, you still manage to take my breath away every day. And look at the time 11:11, I don't need to make a wish, I've got all that I need now. And I hope one day I can make you feel the same.


♠ ♠ ♠


Jack had managed to make the feeling mutual, because the moment his large doe eyes scanned over that message for the millionth time, Alex couldn't form any words. It was as if the other boy had literally taken a step out of a story book, his own prince charming. He probably stared down at his phone for half an hour before he typed out a reply - he wished he could have been just as sickeningly sweet because god knew Jack deserved it. Yet, he didn't know any words in the English language that could possibly even scratch the surface of the feelings he had for him.

From: Lexy-Boo - 7:28 a.m
Good morning, Jacky, you know you own my heart


Alex didn't have the slightest clue when their relationship took a turn to butterfly inducing compliments and confessions of adoration, but he wasn't complaining. It was everything the hopeless romantic had dreamed of and then some. With every day that passed the sixteen year old could feel himself getting caught in a web, falling deeper and deeper down the rabbit hole of no return. He just hoped his heart and his head would stay on the same page, and he wouldn't fall in love.

It hadn't even been forty-five minutes since he sent that last text, but he still had yet to get a reply. Part of him was being self conscious, believing the things he had said put off Jack in some kind of way. He should have known better considering he had just written him an entire paragraph about how he made his heart swell. Besides, it was Saturday. And whenever the skunk haired boy wasn't tied up with school or work he was out like a light until the afternoon hours. Or at least he usually was.

Remembering the message he had received left him with a giddy smile on his face while he looked out on the winter wonderland outside his window. However, his tranquil paradise was shattered by the sound of knocking on his front door. Who the hell could possibly be bugging him at this time of the day? Whoever it was, they probably were searching for his parents rather than Alex himself. Since he never really got out much he couldn't possibly imagine having a visitor unexpected. But his paranoid thoughts left him with a deep set feeling a fear, maybe some psycho was planning on robbing them and tossing his families lifeless bodies in the trunk of his car. Alex sat his mug on the nearby coffee table before tiptoeing toward the door, peeking around the corner to get a better look of who was standing on the porch. He could make out a lanky figure, and dark raven hair with a patch of blonde. Jack.

The boy broke out into a near run, jogging down the hallway to the entrance before sliding on the hardwood with his socks and almost ramming into the door. The elder on the other side raised an eyebrow at his enthusiasm, a chuckle escaping his chest that made Alex's head spin. He unbolted the door and pulled it open, offering a shy smile while his free hand fiddled with his bedhead. Fuck, he had nearly forgotten how he must have looked right now. Surely like garbage compared to Jack, who stood tall with his hands stuffed in the pockets of his leather jacket - small white snowflakes melting on his shoulders and in his hair.

"W-what are you doing here?" he asked, tugging anxiously at his bottom lip. It was a tad bit too late to recover from his earlier excitement.

"Just stopping by to see my boyfriend..." the seventeen year old admitted, the tone in his voice was one Alex couldn't define. The way his almond eyes scanned over his body made his already pink face flush even further.

Alex nodded bashfully, taking a step back so the other could come inside. "Oh, well, you co-" before a full sentence could even pass his lips Jack reached out and placed his hands on his hips after closing the door behind him. That wasn't anything new, until of course he slipped his fingers under the fabric of the hoodie he was wearing - his hands feeling like ice against his pale skin. "Jack! Your hands are fucking cold!" he protested, grabbing the other's wrist tightly and attempting to force his hands away from him.

The boy's yelp however, was more or less ignored as Jack's palms traveled up the length of his back. Chill bumps covered Alex's body both from the cold sensation and the fact that Jack was actually touching his bare skin for possibly the first time in their relationship. And to be honest, he was afraid the butterflies in his stomach would cause him to completely internally combust. "How about you help me warm up, huh?" the lanky teenager suggested, causing a lump to form in his partner's throat. The caramel eyed boy didn't even have the time to try and form a response before his boyfriend's hands moved from his skin to his thighs, lifting him upwards.

Alex panicked once his feet were off the ground, quickly wrapping his legs around the other's waist. "What on Earth are you doing?" he giggled, snaking his arms around Jack's neck as he continued to walk forward until the younger's back was pressed against the wall. Once again the other didn't offer any real answer, he just peppered kisses down the smaller boy's jaw line and neck before his teeth sunk into his porcelain skin, causing Alex's head to fall back as he took in a sharp breath. "Jack..." the sound of his name breathlessly leaving the other's lips made him smirk against his skin. "Jack." he said again before his fingers tangled in his dark hair and pulled his head back. "Jack!"

"Geez, didn't know you were into being rough, Lex." he purred, obviously not catching the point. Alex moved his hand so it cupped over the other's mouth this time around, getting a confused look in return.

"My parents are upstairs!" he warned, the hint of a smile playing on his features. Jack attempted to reply, but his voice was muffled by Alex's palm. "What?"

Once his hand was removed Jack's eyebrows scrunched together, "But... their car..."

Alex couldn't help but giggle when the look of disappointment washed over his boyfriend's face. "The car is in the garage, goofball." pointed out, pressing his lips against the tip of the other's nose. He didn't want to pause and think about what kind of situation the two of them would be in if his mother and father actually had actually gone somewhere. The two of them had never made it past making out and judging by the husky tone of Jack's voice and the forming bruise on his neck, things were taking a whole new turn.

The elder poked out his bottom lip in a pout before placing Alex back onto his feet. He seemed rather embarrassed by the fact that he had practically pounced on the boy the minute he got inside the door. But there was no denying that lately, hours away from his companion have begun to feel like years. The boy intoxicated him in the best way possible.

"So, did you show up unannounced because you were hoping you'd get lucky?" Alex questioned playfully as he straightened out his clothes and watched Jack's gaze fall to his feet. The taller of the two was always full of surprises, showing up in the midst of nowhere and then dragging the other off onto yet another adventure. Sometimes they'd waste their time staring at the stars or driving around the city aimlessly. However, he couldn't recall a single dull moment between the two.

Jack's smile returned as he shook his head back and forth swiftly, "Nope." he replied cheerfully, his mood seemingly shifting suddenly. "You and I are going to go play in the snow."

"Play in the snow?" he echoed, sounding slightly confused yet interested none the less. Running around in a sheet of beautiful white snow was something he had never experienced, once again because of his mother's over protective concern with his disease. But Alex wasn't sick anymore, so there wasn't a damn thing holding him back.

When the skunk haired boy picked up on the gigantic child like smile spread onto the other's face he returned the gesture. "Well, go get dressed. What are you waiting for?"

♠ ♠ ♠


The park was vacant, more than likely because most parents weren't up for waking at eight and dressing their little tikes in layer after layer of snow wear. Alex was thankful for the absence of the loud and boisterous children. The snow laid out across the fields was untouched by tiny footprints, other than those of small animals of course - which were rather adorable.

"Oh man, I can't wait to make a snow angel, and build a snowman and... what else can you do in the snow?" he questioned excitedly, bouncing up and down in the passenger seat of the car.

Jack let out a soft laugh and shook his head playfully, unbuckling himself before shooting his boyfriend a smirk, "Why don't we go find out?"

Alex didn't need to be asked twice, he quickly removed himself from the car and trotted up next to the taller boy, his foot slipping on the ice towards the edge of the parking lot asphalt. Jack quickly held his arms out and caught him before he could hit the floor, getting a thankful smile in return.
"You alright there, klutz?"

"Yes, I'm fine, it's just really slippery..." he whimpered, adjusting himself so he was standing once more, this time being extremely more cautious about where he was going.

"Yeah, ice tends to be slippery." Jack shot back, being his normal smart-ass self. However, his boyfriend didn't seem very amused by his comment. None the less, he clutched on to his arm as if he was afraid of taking a step without him as support. "I just need to grab something from the trunk real fast." the elder announced, prying the tiny fingers away from his forearm before walking over to the back of the vehicle.

Alex didn't dare to move and risk another brush with death, he simply stood on his tiptoes in curiosity. He needed to learn to just go with the flow when it came to this guy because he would always keep him in the dark. One thick brow raised when his boyfriend lifted a large object out of the trunk, a guitar case. And he was just going to go ahead and assume the instrument was safely inside. "Your guitar!"

"Yep." Jack replied, chuckling at the way the other seemed to suddenly light up at the sight of it. He made his way back over to the petite boy and entangled their fingers. He didn't provide any more explanation as to why he had decided to drag it along, but the other was afraid to ask in case he changed his mind and put it back. He had been trying to get his partner to play him a song since the day he stumbled upon it in his closet one afternoon.

Once the two of them made it away from the deadly ice, Jack released his hand once more. This time going ahead and propping his guitar against one of the lone picnic tables. Before he could turn around and return to his boyfriend, he felt something collide into his back followed by the sound of a childish giggle. Really? A snowball? "Oh, you're going to get it now Gaskarth." he warned, spinning around to see Alex's eyes widen.

The skunk haired boy kneeled over and scooped a handful of snow between his palms, packing it into shape before straightening himself out again. Only now there was no sign of Alex. "Aleeeex!" he called, eyes scanning over the empty park. There was no sign of the other boy, that was until he saw small footprints and a mischievous smile found its way onto his face. "Where could have possibly gone..." he said aloud, tip toeing along and following the path of prints.

Jack heard a muffled giggle come from behind one of the large oak trees, he raised the snowball he had gripped in one hand and spun around to the other side. However, Alex was much quicker than him and a handful of freezing ice came in contact with his face before he even had time to throw his own. "Shit! I'm so sorry, babe!" the younger exclaimed, approaching the other as he dried his face.

"Babe, huh? I think I can forgive you." he responded, glancing down at his boyfriend whose face was twisted into a look of concern. Jack's dark hair was covered in snow, causing his companion to giggle as he reached up to shake it out. "Let's just not aim for my face next time, alright?"

"It was an accident..." Alex whimpered, taking a step closer he hooked two fingers of one of his hands into one of Jack's belt loops. "I promise it won't happen again." he insured before pushing himself up onto his tiptoes and capturing the elder's lips in a kiss. The skunk haired boy relaxed into the embrace, until of course he pried his tongue passed his boyfriend's lips. His little decision seemed to be the best one he could have possibly made because the next thing he knew Alex's other hand was slipping past the waistband of his jeans. However, his intentions weren't as Jack was hoping because suddenly the feeling of freezing cold snow caused him to pull back.

"Fuck!" he shouted, clamping his legs shut and sending a scowl in the other's direction, who was busy trying not to fall over in laughter. "Snow, in my pants, really?" he questioned, not getting a reply as the boy dashed off once again. "Yeah! You better run!"

Alex's short legs were really no match to his lanky friend's strides, it was embarrassing how quickly he managed to catch up to him. His long arms wrapped around his waist and lifted him up into the air, causing him to squeal playfully and kick in protest.

"Gotcha!" Jack announced, spinning around and carrying him off. He wasn't entirely sure where the other was taking him, but he was far too into his stubborn sulking to ask. The raven haired boy placed him down by the picnic table before sitting down himself. "Let's take a breather, chasing your ass around is tiring me out."

The younger nodded his head and took his spot next to him, watching his feet dangle back and forth over the ground. Silence fell over the two of them, when he glanced up at Jack he was busy playing with the snow on top of the table - so he decided to do the same. He used his index finger as a makeshift pencil as he traced shapes into the snow like you would the sand at the beach.

"Whatcha drawing?" Jack suddenly asked after a few passing moments, glancing over the other's shoulder to see two stick figures. One was noticeably larger than the other, and they appeared to be holding hands.

"It's us!" Alex announced, a dimpled grin on his face before he let his head fall onto the elder's shoulder. The snow before Jack had been completely pushed to the side, leaving the wood exposed which had been carved into. His eyes traveled to the small pocket knife in his boyfriend's grip before it returned to the familiar heart - this time the initials read J + A.

"So, are you upset that I defaced public property?"

"What?! Are you crazy? I love it..."

Alex's fingers traced over the shape over and over with a dumb smile on his lips. The dark haired boy only watched as the other seemingly fell into a trance, until the lack of conversation began to drive him crazy. "The scarf was a nice touch by the way." he commented, fiddling with the fabric around the other's neck.

"Shut up, I wouldn't need to wear it if you hadn't left that huge hickey on my neck." he retorted, huffing slightly under his breath and causing Jack to chuckle.

"I'm sorry, pipsqueak, is there any way I can make it up to you?"

"I think I might have an idea..." Alex began, reaching towards the end of the table and grabbing the guitar the other had placed there moments before. He could see the playful eye roll that came from his boyfriend, but that wasn't going to deter him. "Please?"

"Fine, hand it here." he gave in, taking the instrument from its case and placing it on his lap. The moment he did so Alex scooted closer and pressed himself against his side, seemingly mesmerized by the way Jack's long fingers brushed against the strings while he tuned his guitar. "Any requests?"

"Surprise me." he said, the large smile on his face never faltering. The notes began to fill the silence between them, Jack's two toned bangs were hanging in front of his eyes while he chewed on his bottom lip in concentration. The beauty of the whole moment was enough to leave Alex speechless, but what happened next only made things better.

"You are my peach, you are my plum." Jack couldn't sing for shit, they both knew that. But it was sweet none less, and Alex knew the song so the minute he recognized the lyrics his face grew a dark red. "You are my earth, you are my sun." the elders gaze moved to his boyfriend's face, who now kept his own eyes cast to the ground. "I love your fingers, I love your toes. The back of your head, the tip of your nose."

The soft sounds of the strumming of the guitar made up for the fact that Jack was completely off tune. Not to mention the words leaving his lips were making Alex's head spin. One look in his direction and he knew he was in trouble now. The ground was crumbling beneath him and there was no longer any avoiding the inevitable fall. That goofy string bean had managed to capture his heart completely. The crude words of Mr. Newcomb, no longer echoed in the back of his head because Jack was right all along. The only thing the two of them needed was one another. Not a force on Earth was going to change that.
♠ ♠ ♠
wow look who is not dead! i am so sorry that it's been like what, two months since i last updated? i was gonna wait until spring break to get this up but decided to go ahead and work on it this weekend because a few people have been wondering where the hell i disappeared to.

but here we go, to make it up to you heres a crappy filler chapter with plenty of jalex fluffiness.
if i'm not mistaken and don't decide to add anymore filler, the next two chapters are going to be the ones i've been excited to write ever since i planned this fic - take that as you will.

as always, i love you guys and i am absolutely honored to have you reading my stuff and following me along on this little journey and what not. i wouldn't be sharing my writing if it wasn't for you guys. if you ever feel like hitting me up some time be sure to follow me on tumblr - flyzlk.tumblr.com, i'm on there like 24/7