Green Eternity: Lost and Running

Quinn eventually found me hiding out in the lounge; he scuttled in pretending he didn’t see me.
He quietly closed the door behind him and jumped when he saw me, so very fake.
“Jeph! I didn’t know you were in here!”
I rolled my eyes and went back to watching TV.
“Okay, okay, maybe I knew you were in here, I just didn’t want you to run away”
I muted the television and turned to Quinn.
“The only times I’ve run away from you is when you’ve had something sharp and pokey in your hand Quinn, even then I was joking”
“Geez Jeph, sorry, I just wanted to see how you were getting along”
Okay so I knew Quinn was trying to make an effort, but after the dream I didn’t want to see him, he brought it all back, even though it was just a dream, it’s become just my life.
I moved over to show Quinn I wanted him to sit next to me, a bit too excitedly he sat down next to me and twiddled his thumbs.
“So what’s she like?” Quinn blurted before he could think.
“What’s who like?” I knew what he meant but I wanted to drag this out for as long as I could.
“Freya, the one” Quinn’s eyes sparkled with hope.
I sighed, Quinn was the only one I told the full dream to, every last detail, I really hoped he had the same dream, but he didn’t.
“Freya, wow dude, she was definitely the one for you, she’s so hard to describe, but she and you got on so well, you were so happy” I didn’t elaborate at all, I didn’t want to remember.
Quinn smiled, patted my leg and got up.
“Thanks dude, made my day so much better” he whistled as he walked out.
I knew Quinn believed it was true, or at least he wanted it to be true, I had the feeling he was going to keep on asking me the same question day in and out for a while, I think he really craves ‘Freya’ but no where near as much as I crave Scarlett, she’s real, she’s got to be. I had her once, and I had to leave her. Is this really how I’m seeing things?
It was just a dream.
Just.
A.
Dream.

Trial #1 – sleep without medication.
Ever since I had the dream I was afraid to fall asleep and to see nothing, to realise she was just a fragment of my imagination. So if I drugged myself up enough I’d fall asleep and see nothing and know it was just the drugs, yes?
So here I am, trying to get back to her, I’m going to fall asleep and see what happens.
Wish me luck, please?

Well it wont happen for a while yet, it was still light outside and everyone was awake, time to settle back into the usual routine of laughter and stupidity.
I walked out from the front lounge and back into my old life.
Bert and Dan looked up from their position on the floor, trying their hardest to act normal.
Quinn sniggered from the couch as Bert tried to get up.
“This-isn’t-what-it-looks-like” Bert panted as he tried to move Dan off his stomach.
I raised my eyebrow and walked over to the kettle, noticing the already made cup of green tea beside it I smiled and took it over to the couch to join Quinn.
Bert finally got free of Dan and brushed himself off.
“We were fighting over who was to take your cup of green tea to you, Dan’s just a brownie point stealer” Bert shot evil glances at Dan and retrieved more alcohol from the fridge.
“Bert’s just jealous because I’m your favourite” Dan smiled at Bert and jumped onto my lap.
“Ah Dan get off you big fucking lump of meat” I giggled trying to balance my cup.
“See what I mean? He loves me” Dan hugged me and got off.
Quinn leant over and cupped his hand to my ear.
“It’s good to see you back dude”
“What was that Quinn?! Did I hear my name?!” Dan put his hands on his hips staring directly at Quinn.
“I was just commenting on how much weight you’ve put on Dan, that’s all” Quinn laughed and dodged a cushion from Dan.
Bert walked over to the DVD player and pressed play letting thumping music vibrate everything within a hundred mile radius.
After that we all settled down for a night of jokes and dancing, just the way it should be, yes?
3am rolled in and so did the tiredness, so, tired.
I crept off to my bunk and settled into my blankets, letting sleep take me over.
Not knowing what to expect.