Until You Feel It

''Shoes Eden! I need shoes!'' I said, my head in her closet and my butt in the air.

''And you're in my closet because?'' Eden asked, sitting on her bed and flipping through a magazine.

''You have nicer shoes than me.'' I said sweetly, grabbing a pair of her black pumps.

''Why do you care so much? I thought you were 'just friends'.'' Eden said teasingly.

''I don't! And we are just friends.'' I said, lifting my leg and slipping on a shoe.

''Friends who make out all night and then go on dates.'' she said, sarcastically.

''Shut up.'' I said, sticking my tongue out at her and she stuck hers out at me.

''What time is it?'' I asked, flopping down on her bed.

''Six thirty.'' she told me, glancing at the clock.

Once again I was ready annoyingly early. It was Friday night and Alex wouldn't be here until around seven.

''Where are you guys going anyways?'' Eden asked, throwing her magazine to her nightstand and crossing her legs.

''I don't even know, he never told me.'' I said, absently picking at the ends of my hair.

It was silent for a minute and then Eden spoke.

''So how does Bill feel about all of this?'' she asked.

''What?'' I asked, snapping out of the trance that the ends of my hair had cast over me.

''How does Bill feel about you going out with Alex?'' she asked.

''He said he was happy, he didn't mind. Why?'' I asked, wondering what she was getting at.

''Are you sure he didn't just tell you that?'' she asked and I was feeling so lost.

''What are you talking about?'' I asked.

''Was I the only one who noticed his drastic change in mood after he heard Alex asked you out?'' she asked.

''Heard him?'' I asked as the pieces started to fall into place.

''Bill was in the bathroom, remember?'' she asked and everything hit me like a speeding train.

Was that the reason Bill had been upset? Because he heard me agree to go out with Alex?

''But- I- he.'' I stuttered, trying to make sense of what Eden was trying to tell me. Bill and I were friends! He didn't have feelings for me…did he?

''I think he does.'' she said as if she had read my mind.

''And I think you do to.'' she said and the revelation train seemed to turn around and hit me again.

Suddenly all the pieces clicked into place. That was the reason Bill had the uncanny ability to make me blush, the reason my heart fluttered when he got too close, the reason I kept falling asleep thinking about him.

''E, I think you're right.'' I said incredulously and she smiled.

''I'm always right Amanda.'' she said as if it was common knowledge.

''I think I have feelings for Bill.'' I said.

I think a part of me always knew it was true, but it felt so good to say it, to not be so confused anymore, to think that maybe he could feel the same way…

But my revelation was interrupted when there was a loud knock on the door. I jumped, suddenly remembering that I had a date with Alex. All of a sudden I didn't want to go.

''I could fake sick!'' I thought.

I didn't want to be mean though, so I decided that I would go and make it clear to Alex that we were friends, and then as soon as I got back, I would call Bill.

''You gonna get that?'' Eden asked, almost as if she had heard the internal debate I had just had.

''Yea.'' I sighed and she laughed a bit.

I got up and went to the door. When I opened it, standing there in a tight black t-shirt under a white sweater, was Alex. He smiled when he saw me and I returned.

''You look nice.'' he said, pulling me against him in a tight hug.

''Thanks so do you.'' I said, returning his hug.

''So where are we going?'' I asked as we walked towards the elevator.

''When was the last time you went to the beach?'' he asked with a grin.