‹ Prequel: Her Monologue
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F I V E.
I dropped my bag at the door of my apartment as I walked inside. “Mia I’m home.” I said and rubbed my eyes as I sat on the little couch from my child hood home. I looked over at her when she walked out of what would be her room. “Hey how was work?” She asked me I shook my head slowly. “Jesse what happened?” She asked sitting to my right I looked over at her and sighed out loudly. “Jax saw me he came into my work today and I can’t believe I see him after two weeks and my heart my whole fucking heart grew and jumped up into my throat!” I said groaning in frustration. I looked at her waiting for her input. “And what happened?” She asked I blinked at her and frowned. “That’s not what I wanted to hear from you!” I laughed slightly and muttered, “I turned him down much to my heart and brain’s dismay.” I told her and shook my head slightly.
“Good on you Jess, you’re so much better than him.” Mia said I looked at her and scoffed rolling my eyes as I shook my head. “No, I don’t want that bullshit Mia, I’m not better than him I’m just not the one for him he’s too much of a whore to hold down.” I’ll admit it killed me to say that about myself and him. I wanted him to love me but I knew it wouldn’t happen. “Ouch, Jesse you’re so hard on yourself you’ve always been I don’t get you. What makes you like that?” She asked me I looked at her shifting in my seat.
“My mother fucked me up inside, so did my father.” I told Mia and shrugged, “Not much else I can say beside that I mean. What do you expect for the child of a psycho path and a druggie?” I asked her and laughed quietly at my own words. I knew that wasn’t the whole story to my parents but nobody else would know I wouldn’t open up to anyone again. Not after what happened with Jax. I wanted to be like those characters on TV who could just turn off their humanity and become these cold creatures with no love, no pain and no fear.
“I’m going to take a shower, then I can cook us something.” I told Mia as I watched the Sun starting to set in charming.
Jax’s P.O.V
Seeing Jesse today really made me happy even if she still hated my guts she was still in town and I still had time to make it up to her. I walked into the clubhouse my head held high. “Whoa you did a complete 360, I like it boss.” Happy said to me I shook my head and smiled at him, “Jesse, I saw Jesse she’s in town she’s living here and working at the corner store so now I know where I can find her at. I just need to find where she lives.” I told him and smiled.
“Want me to follow her home and find out where she lives?” Hap asked me I grinned and nodded my head, “That’s what I was going to ask you buddy!” I hugged Happy tightly and walked off, I saw Clay still hanging around the clubhouse. “Shouldn’t you be at home?” I asked him rather harshly. “Why bother?” Clay asked since I took the president patch from him and his bum lungs he’d been a real quiet guy. “Go home.” I said to him and looked at Juice, “Take him home.” I said to him and walked into the back room. “I could say the same to you son, holding onto that girl will make you weak and sick.” He said to me I stopped in my tracks and looked down the hall at him, “You have no say in what I do, or this club does anymore old man, and go home.” I said to him and walked into the back room not caring if I had pissed him off or not.
My focus right now was getting the club away from the guns, into the more legal business of Escorts and porn. I sat on the bed and pulled a cigarette between my lips lighting it I grabbed my journal which was basically turning into the story of my life much like the one my father had left behind. I wrote in it again talking about the balance between hate and love in the club how I needed to keep myself grounded and I lost the one thing that felt like it’d be the most solid thing in my life. I ended the entry with the final line ‘and I will make her see the truth, love shines brighter.’ I closed the book and laid back against my bed sighing out quietly. “I love her…” I said to myself.
End P.O.V
I walked around my kitchen making spaghetti for Mia and I, “So have you put anymore thought into my offer?” I asked her the other night I had mentioned her moving in with me full time she’d be closer to her boyfriend and she’d have me plus I’m sure Charming could use a good shrink. “ I have,” She said looking at me and smiled I looked at her and waited but when I didn’t get an answer I got impatient. “Well? Are you just going to stand there smiling at me or are you going to tell me your answer?” I asked her and laughed softly.
“I’ll move in with you!” She said and smiled at me I squealed and jumped over to her. I literally jumped from one side of the apartment to the other just to hug her tightly I squeezed her body in my embrace. “YAY! Oh my god! We’re going to have so much fun together!” I squealed and smiled widely. We ate dinner in peace that night and in the morning bright and early I was off to work while Mia was on the phone with her father arranging for him to send her things.
I walked down the steps of the apartment complex I was currently residing in and walked down the road to work not feeling like taking my car today I hummed as I listened to my iPod on the way to work I walked in the back door and clocked in five minutes early. Throwing the tacky red vest on over my tan shirt I walked out onto the floor and got behind the counter unlocking the doors for business. I sat back humming along to my iPod listening to my music. The day drug on fairly slow only a few customers I locked up and walked out the back starting to walk home when I noticed a black SUV following me slowly.
I blinked a little keeping my gaze down as I walked into the parking lot of my apartment complex before jogging up the stairs I burst through the door and closed it behind me locking all three of the locks I sighed and slid down the door my heart was pounding I saw Mia come running out of her room. “What happened!?” She screamed swinging a frying pan around.
“A frying pan? What’s that going to do Rapunzel?” I asked and stood up I shrugged it off, “Nothing happened I just felt as if someone was watching me today so I ran home.” I said to her and pushed my hand on top of the frying pan to push her arm down. “Calm down Rapunzel, its okay Flynn rider isn’t here.” I said joking lightly I saw her roll her eyes as she set the pan down.
“I thought something was wrong okay! It’s the first thing I saw stop fucking with me.” She said to me wiggling her finger in my face I laughed and shook my head “I can’t you’re making it way too easy to fuck with you.” I said and walked into the kitchen my mind was racing I prayed nobody would burst through the door. A million scenarios blinding me to the fact someone had knocked on the door Mia went to open the door I dove over the couch and pulled her back over the couch I covered her mouth.
“Shh…” I said to her and glanced out the little window by the door I sighed in relief when I saw Jax. “False alarm.” I said to her and let her go she threw her arms in the air. I opened the door and looked at Jax, “Who told you where I live?” I asked him then it clicked, “WERE YOU THE FUCKING SUV THAT WAS FOLLOWING ME!?” I snapped at him and pulled him inside just so I could yell at him. “You nearly gave me a motherfucking heart attack! I ALMOST BROKE MIA’S NECK HIDING HER!”
My eyes widened when I looked over at Mia who was still standing in the same positon arms raised in a ‘what the fuck is going on’ stance. I looked down in defeat and pointed, “Mia, Jackson.” I pointed at Jax. “Jax, Mia.” I said and sighed out.
“Jesse, I’m not the one who was following you in the SUV, I don’t know who that was.” Jax said quietly as he looked between me and my friend, my head snapped towards him. “Excuse me what?” I said and then I slammed the door closed and locked all three locks I looked out the window. “A black SUV followed me home from work…” I said to him and I was mentally freaking out.
Mia grabbed her phone to call the cops until Jax took the phone from her, “No I’ll handle it.” He said to her she slapped him and took her phone back, “Don’t fucking touch my shit Biker.” She said harshly and walked into her room slamming the door.
I turned and looked at Jax, “She hates you, because I hate you.” I said to him and looked back out the window. “Could you see into the SUV?” He asked I looked back at him, “I was too busy running for my life to focus.” I said to him and sighed out quietly. “What would anyone want with me? I haven’t done shit.” I said to him and rubbed my eyes.
“You’ve been around me, it could be a rival gang wanting you.” He said I looked at him and sighed running a hand through my hair I sighed out looking up at the ceiling, “What do you want Jax?” I asked looking at him I honestly wasn’t in the mood for any of his bullshit.
“I want to talk to you, please…” He said looking at me everything in my body told me to say no to him but I couldn’t. I walked towards the sofa and sat down patting the space next to me. “Sit. Talk.” I said to him and sighed quietly not really making eye contact with him. I’d listen but I don’t think I’d left myself forgive.
“Good on you Jess, you’re so much better than him.” Mia said I looked at her and scoffed rolling my eyes as I shook my head. “No, I don’t want that bullshit Mia, I’m not better than him I’m just not the one for him he’s too much of a whore to hold down.” I’ll admit it killed me to say that about myself and him. I wanted him to love me but I knew it wouldn’t happen. “Ouch, Jesse you’re so hard on yourself you’ve always been I don’t get you. What makes you like that?” She asked me I looked at her shifting in my seat.
“My mother fucked me up inside, so did my father.” I told Mia and shrugged, “Not much else I can say beside that I mean. What do you expect for the child of a psycho path and a druggie?” I asked her and laughed quietly at my own words. I knew that wasn’t the whole story to my parents but nobody else would know I wouldn’t open up to anyone again. Not after what happened with Jax. I wanted to be like those characters on TV who could just turn off their humanity and become these cold creatures with no love, no pain and no fear.
“I’m going to take a shower, then I can cook us something.” I told Mia as I watched the Sun starting to set in charming.
Jax’s P.O.V
Seeing Jesse today really made me happy even if she still hated my guts she was still in town and I still had time to make it up to her. I walked into the clubhouse my head held high. “Whoa you did a complete 360, I like it boss.” Happy said to me I shook my head and smiled at him, “Jesse, I saw Jesse she’s in town she’s living here and working at the corner store so now I know where I can find her at. I just need to find where she lives.” I told him and smiled.
“Want me to follow her home and find out where she lives?” Hap asked me I grinned and nodded my head, “That’s what I was going to ask you buddy!” I hugged Happy tightly and walked off, I saw Clay still hanging around the clubhouse. “Shouldn’t you be at home?” I asked him rather harshly. “Why bother?” Clay asked since I took the president patch from him and his bum lungs he’d been a real quiet guy. “Go home.” I said to him and looked at Juice, “Take him home.” I said to him and walked into the back room. “I could say the same to you son, holding onto that girl will make you weak and sick.” He said to me I stopped in my tracks and looked down the hall at him, “You have no say in what I do, or this club does anymore old man, and go home.” I said to him and walked into the back room not caring if I had pissed him off or not.
My focus right now was getting the club away from the guns, into the more legal business of Escorts and porn. I sat on the bed and pulled a cigarette between my lips lighting it I grabbed my journal which was basically turning into the story of my life much like the one my father had left behind. I wrote in it again talking about the balance between hate and love in the club how I needed to keep myself grounded and I lost the one thing that felt like it’d be the most solid thing in my life. I ended the entry with the final line ‘and I will make her see the truth, love shines brighter.’ I closed the book and laid back against my bed sighing out quietly. “I love her…” I said to myself.
End P.O.V
I walked around my kitchen making spaghetti for Mia and I, “So have you put anymore thought into my offer?” I asked her the other night I had mentioned her moving in with me full time she’d be closer to her boyfriend and she’d have me plus I’m sure Charming could use a good shrink. “ I have,” She said looking at me and smiled I looked at her and waited but when I didn’t get an answer I got impatient. “Well? Are you just going to stand there smiling at me or are you going to tell me your answer?” I asked her and laughed softly.
“I’ll move in with you!” She said and smiled at me I squealed and jumped over to her. I literally jumped from one side of the apartment to the other just to hug her tightly I squeezed her body in my embrace. “YAY! Oh my god! We’re going to have so much fun together!” I squealed and smiled widely. We ate dinner in peace that night and in the morning bright and early I was off to work while Mia was on the phone with her father arranging for him to send her things.
I walked down the steps of the apartment complex I was currently residing in and walked down the road to work not feeling like taking my car today I hummed as I listened to my iPod on the way to work I walked in the back door and clocked in five minutes early. Throwing the tacky red vest on over my tan shirt I walked out onto the floor and got behind the counter unlocking the doors for business. I sat back humming along to my iPod listening to my music. The day drug on fairly slow only a few customers I locked up and walked out the back starting to walk home when I noticed a black SUV following me slowly.
I blinked a little keeping my gaze down as I walked into the parking lot of my apartment complex before jogging up the stairs I burst through the door and closed it behind me locking all three of the locks I sighed and slid down the door my heart was pounding I saw Mia come running out of her room. “What happened!?” She screamed swinging a frying pan around.
“A frying pan? What’s that going to do Rapunzel?” I asked and stood up I shrugged it off, “Nothing happened I just felt as if someone was watching me today so I ran home.” I said to her and pushed my hand on top of the frying pan to push her arm down. “Calm down Rapunzel, its okay Flynn rider isn’t here.” I said joking lightly I saw her roll her eyes as she set the pan down.
“I thought something was wrong okay! It’s the first thing I saw stop fucking with me.” She said to me wiggling her finger in my face I laughed and shook my head “I can’t you’re making it way too easy to fuck with you.” I said and walked into the kitchen my mind was racing I prayed nobody would burst through the door. A million scenarios blinding me to the fact someone had knocked on the door Mia went to open the door I dove over the couch and pulled her back over the couch I covered her mouth.
“Shh…” I said to her and glanced out the little window by the door I sighed in relief when I saw Jax. “False alarm.” I said to her and let her go she threw her arms in the air. I opened the door and looked at Jax, “Who told you where I live?” I asked him then it clicked, “WERE YOU THE FUCKING SUV THAT WAS FOLLOWING ME!?” I snapped at him and pulled him inside just so I could yell at him. “You nearly gave me a motherfucking heart attack! I ALMOST BROKE MIA’S NECK HIDING HER!”
My eyes widened when I looked over at Mia who was still standing in the same positon arms raised in a ‘what the fuck is going on’ stance. I looked down in defeat and pointed, “Mia, Jackson.” I pointed at Jax. “Jax, Mia.” I said and sighed out.
“Jesse, I’m not the one who was following you in the SUV, I don’t know who that was.” Jax said quietly as he looked between me and my friend, my head snapped towards him. “Excuse me what?” I said and then I slammed the door closed and locked all three locks I looked out the window. “A black SUV followed me home from work…” I said to him and I was mentally freaking out.
Mia grabbed her phone to call the cops until Jax took the phone from her, “No I’ll handle it.” He said to her she slapped him and took her phone back, “Don’t fucking touch my shit Biker.” She said harshly and walked into her room slamming the door.
I turned and looked at Jax, “She hates you, because I hate you.” I said to him and looked back out the window. “Could you see into the SUV?” He asked I looked back at him, “I was too busy running for my life to focus.” I said to him and sighed out quietly. “What would anyone want with me? I haven’t done shit.” I said to him and rubbed my eyes.
“You’ve been around me, it could be a rival gang wanting you.” He said I looked at him and sighed running a hand through my hair I sighed out looking up at the ceiling, “What do you want Jax?” I asked looking at him I honestly wasn’t in the mood for any of his bullshit.
“I want to talk to you, please…” He said looking at me everything in my body told me to say no to him but I couldn’t. I walked towards the sofa and sat down patting the space next to me. “Sit. Talk.” I said to him and sighed quietly not really making eye contact with him. I’d listen but I don’t think I’d left myself forgive.
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