How to Kiss a Girl for Beginners

Here are some life lessons that everyone should learn sometime in their lives, and if you haven't yet, allow me, Harper Winters, to help you out:

1. Don't do business with someone whose name is Viper, or any other deadly reptile for that fact.

2. Don't buy that 30 dollar lipstick on a credit card. I know it's cute. I know you want it. But you have no money.

3. Don't let a guy named Felix convince you to pretend to date someone for money.

4. Especially if the first time you meet them, they throw up on your shoes.

5. If you are severely in debt the last thing on your mind should be boys, unless they're rich and famous or a Backstreet Boy, and especially don't think about the jerky ones.

Now if only someone could have told me this before everything happened.