Dear You

There's just one night before Pete and the boys leave for their album release and tour. The date of the release is the same date as Aubrey's graduation, and Pete feels more than guilty that he won't be in attendance. "It's fine," she assures him as she folds his laundry. "You had the release date picked before you knew me." She tosses some of his shirts into his open suitcase on the bed.

"I bet you'll look so cute and collegiate," he jokes.

"Oh, of course. But then again I'm short enough that I still look fourteen," she rolls her eyes. "But anyway." She sits down on the bed next to Pete. "I know you'll have fun and it will only be a couple months before we're together again. We can do it."

"Yeah, I know." Pete pats her knee before standing. "How about we grab somethin' to eat?" He scoops up her purse that she so gracefully dumped on the floor when she came in. He holds it out to her until she takes it and stands. She follows Pete downstairs and outside into the humid May heat. They end up having slices of pizza in the city and walking around to the different shops. Aubrey doesn't know what to talk about so she stays quiet while Pete tells her about all the places he's going to see on tour and all the things he hopes he'll do.

"Hey, you all right?" He bumps his shoulder against Aubrey's. She nods.

"Yeah, I'm fine, just don't have much to say."

"Oh, all right," he smiles at her a little. "I'm gonna miss you, Aubs."

"I know," she sighs. "I'll miss ya too, Pete."

"Should we head back to your apartment?"

"Yeah, I'd like that," Aubrey murmurs, taking Pete's hand in hers. The drive to her apartment is solemn as the idea of parting becomes more pervasive and depressing. When they enter the apartment everything is dark and still. Aubrey flips on the light before they kick off their shoes beside the door, as they always do.

"Come on, Aubs. Let's lie down, okay?" Pete grasps her hand in his, leading her upstairs to her bedroom before she can respond. He peppers her skin with light kisses as they tumble into bed. "I'm gonna miss you." Pete whispers against her ear.

"I know, Pete. I'm just sad." Aubrey pulls the covers around herself tight, leaning her head against Pete's shoulder. "I don't wanna be sad. I've got stuff to do, my life's still going to go on. But you won't be here and that makes me sad." Her voice catches in her throat. "After being with you almost every day for so long, it feels like a piece of me is going to be missing. I don't know how to deal with that."

Pete wraps his arm around her shoulders. "We'll be okay, Aubrey. I promise. I'm coming home, and you're gonna come out with us. We're not just never going to see each other again, you know?"

"I know. And I'm so happy for you guys. It's just hard for me to watch you go."

Pete rubs his thumb against her cheek, wiping away the tears making their way down her face. "Don't cry, Aubs. It's okay," he tries to soothe her, but knows it isn't really helping.

"I'm sorry, Pete. I'm just bein' stupid." She shrugs, sniffling a little. "I'm just gonna try to sleep. You can stay if you want or go, doesn't matter to me."

She says it doesn't matter but Pete knows it does. He wraps his arms around Aubrey, pulling her against his body. "Of course I'm gonna stay with you, sweetheart." His voice sends shivers down her spine.

"Love you, honeycomb head," she yawns sleepily.

"I love you too, Aubrey." Pete's voice catches in his throat, tears stinging his eyes. "I really do love you."

"I know you do," Aubrey murmurs sadly. "Go to sleep."

Pete doesn't sleep. He's too caught up in thinking about his time apart from Aubrey. He stares at the ceiling for a few hours before he hears Aubrey's roommate come inside and upstairs to her room across the hall. Pete's sad. He's fucking sad and doesn't know what he's going to do without Aubrey or how he's going to act while they're apart. More than anything he's afraid he's going to hurt her somehow. He knows he gets pretty crazy on tour, but he makes a promise to himself in the darkness of Aubrey's bedroom that he's going to try his hardest to be everything she's ever wanted. He promises himself he'll never hurt her, but it scares him to think about how difficult that could be while he's gone.