Build Me Up & Tear Me Down

I was still in the same mood when I woke up that morning, only a little bit better.

The bathroom door clicked open and I saw Patrick walked out. “Hey, you’re awake.”

“Well, actually my body is still in the dreamland and this is just my hologram. Pretty real, huh?”

“It’s cool,” he smiled, sitting next to me.

“Did I stay here for the whole night?” I asked and he nodded. “Where’s Ashlee?”

“She’s going out to grab some eat with the others.”

I was staying in Patrick and Andy’s room last night, and I fell asleep in here I guess. Ashlee was here to accompany me and Patrick slept in Ashlee and Pete’s room and Andy went to Joe and I’s room.

None of us spoke; we just sat there on the bed in silence. Me trying to collect my whole mind away from the sleep I had and him – I don’t know what makes him quiet.

“Why don’t you get some shower to freshen up?” he finally said. “Shower will rinse away your problems – well, at least making you feel better.”

“Shower? As in in my room?” He gave me a ‘duh’ look. “I don’t want to be alone,” whined.

He rolled his eyes and me and said, “All right we’re gonna go to your room.”

“Yay! I love you Patrick,” I said as we both stood up and went outside his room.

I was surprised to see Ryan was leaning against the wall beside my room’s door, waiting for me. He looked up from the floor when Patrick closed the door.

“Hey…” he said, but I looked away. I looked away because I don’t know how to face him. I actually wanted to see him so bad. “Indi,” he said, softly, as he walked closer to me.

“I’m gonna go in and leave you guys alone to talk,” Patrick interrupted and went into my room.

“Look Ryan about the kiss—“

“Shh, it’s okay,” he said, caressing my cheek with his finger. “I understand.”

“No you don’t Ryan you were standing there when Trey kissed me and you called my name and I ran away from you—“

“Shh,” he said and pulled me into a hug. “I know. I know. That’s why I came here to talk to you about it.”

“I’m sorry.” My eyes were watering. “Trey said that he wanted to have a date with me – one date. But I didn’t know that he would kiss me – nor did I saw it coming,” I explained.

He didn’t say anything and kissed the top of my head.

“…Do you believe me?” I asked.

“Of course,” he said and pulled away until the space was enough for him to look down to my eyes, not breaking the hug. “I believe in everything you said. I love you.”

“I love you too,” I said and buried my head in his shoulder.

You believe in me but what I’m telling you is not the whole truth. Ironic.

Ryan
Someone rang the doorbell so I went to open the door. Was I imagining that my brother was standing in front of the door? He wouldn’t give me a visit, I know that.

“Are you gonna let me in or what?” he said. I stepped aside and he went in. “Nice place.”

“What do you want?” I asked, closing the door.

“Oh, I’m not thirsty.”

I rolled my eyes at him. “Not that, moron. I mean, what do you want – what are you doing, here, in my apartment.”

“Is it wrong to give my brother a visit?”

“Not really.”

“So, umm, I met your girlfriend.”

“Yeah, she told me that.”

“She’s really pretty isn’t she?”

I glared at him. “What do you want from her?” I asked with a ‘she’s mine’ look. I know he would do something; he always wanted what I had. Even my life as a rockstar.

“Nothing,” he answered with a smirk and picked up a frame, filled with a picture of me and Indi.
“Is she good in bed?”

“What the fu—“

“Don’t tell me you hadn’t had sex with her.”

“I’m not you!” I said, my voice rising. “You sleep with every girl with every chance you’ve got. I’m just gonna wait for her until she’s ready; she’s keeping it for the marriage anyway.”

“So she’s a virgin?”

I gave him a worse glare and nodded.

He chuckled. “Ryan, you don’t know about that.”

“Exactly,” I said sarcastically.

“No, seriously.”

“What do you mean?”

He sighed and placed the photo frame back. “She was amazing,” he said, extending the second ‘a’ in ‘amazing’.

“What did you do to her?”

“I didn’t do anything – except offering her to be mine when she went to Instant at the night where she had a fight with her boyfriend. She said yes.”

“Get out,” I said, opening the door.

He only stared at me.

“I said get out!”

He walked outside, but still looking at me when he got outside. “She’s really hot.”

I slammed the door in front of his face. I sat on the floor, leaning against the door. No way. Indi didn’t sleep with him, did she? She told me she was in her friend’s house.

Or is she?

I shook that question off my mind. Maybe Trey was lying. But he could be right, because when he wants something, he gets it. No matter how he does it.