We the North

I can remember the first time I met him, sort of – I was naked. But, he was like happiness bottled in a jar. Swirling like golden drifts of breezy magic, beaming down at me laughably. He was egging me on, and at the time I couldn’t find the strength to sprinkle the bits of magic upon myself and fly.



Since moving to Thunder Bay I definitely felt like my oncologist was my best friend. Dr. Melanie De Yong was just about a gentle and empathetic as they come. I would see her about four times a year, in the last two years it was usually to check out my skin.

I was beyond pale and well aware of it. Just about every pimple, mosquito bite, vampire bite, mole or any anything stuck out like a literal sore thumb. Each time something new popped up she would remove it.

So I was lying on the table, naked, butt in the air when he walked in. I was so comfortable around Dr. De Yong that the idea of draping something over myself just didn’t even compute anymore. I didn’t really matter though, she’d just remove the drapery so she could finish her head to toe exam anyways. In fact I had probably been naked around more then my fair share of people, especially men. If there was anyone left in my life to disapprove of my choices, it didn’t matter.

Dr. De Yong had temporarily vacated the room in order for me to disrobe in private. Today there were two particularily concerting moles developing on my back. They were deeply coloured and asymmetric with fuzzy edges – the typical sign of bad or rather malignant luck. And they itched like a crazy son of a bitch.

I laid there waiting, just waiting, for her to come back. She’d normally just step out quick and make a phone call while I got ready and in no time be back. I suppose the fact that it took fifteen minutes instead of five should have been my first tip off that something went wrong. But I was taking my time drawing out where I might put my next tattoo on my arm when he walked in.

There was a knock on the door, the usual sign of the doctor’s return, and so I shouted the regular old, “Come in.” I called still planning the newest intricate design that could cover up the fading scars across my flesh. Laser removals of moles was neither pretty nor painless.

“Hot damn.” Called a voice from the door and I looked up to see a young looking dude dressed in sea foam coloured scrubs and a lab coat just staring at me.

“Get the fuck out.” I shouted and he quickly closed the door.

“That’s sexual harassment.” I shouted, standing up and trying to find a hospital gown to dress myself in. I was soon successful, and after yanking on a gown, I opened the door and saw the same guy leaning casually against the wall parallel to me. “Who are you?” I bit out looking him over from head to toe.

He stood there in all of his heightened glory, sandy blond hair cut short and curly sprouting from his head, and deep eyes holding a glow of mischief grinning out at me. His mouth lay in a lopsided devilish grin and overall I’d say he looked like a dick.

“Dr. Hudson Darcy at your service, ma’am.” He waved and did a small type of bow, the smile that touched his never really leaving.

“Not a doctor,” Dr. De Yong called, I could hear her heels clicking against the ceramic floor of the hospital, and as she rounded the corner she looked positively annoyed, “Hudson, is a medical student,” she clarified, “he’s shadowing me since he’s interested in oncology. Are you comfortable with him joining your visit today, Meredith?” Her eyebrows were peaked and she smiled sympathetically. “If you are uncomfortable, given today’s appointment, it is completely understandable.”

I wanted to say no, I really did, but there were two things holding me back. The first was simple. The look he was giving me was a challenge, and it was clear that if I said no I would be admitting defeat. He was training to be a doctor, so he no doubt looked at naked people all the time. The second was my mother’s motto. She had told me to always say yes to any opportunity, it was how she attempted to find adventure and love in her life. So with the two of them daring me, I really had no choice.

“He can come.” I agreed through narrowed eyes and a tight lip. Dr. De Yong smiled immediately out of relief. Hudson didn’t skip a beat as he pushed off the wall and ushered me inside.

“Cute butt.” He called and I could hear the grin in his voice while I lied myself back down on the table.

“Be professional, Hudson.” Dr. De Yong tutted. She and Hudson were hovering above me in a second talking with some random medical jargon that I would never bother to try and understand. Soon enough she asked for some elbow room as she began to cut and zap the Melanoma’s from my left shoulder blade. “Can you sit up so I can check your front, Meredith?” She asked while taking a step back.

I sat up slowly, almost begrudgingly, to face Dr. De Yong and Hudson. Dr. De Yong was there in an instant feeling my lymnodes and checking over every inch of my skin. Hudson on the other hand stayed a few paces back.

“Come check.” I suggested, leaning my head back against the wall and closing my eyes in hopes of relieving myself from the agonizing stare of his warm brown eyes.

I felt his hands on my body then. They were rough, not quite as calloused as mine, as they pinched my lymphnodes lightly, so lightly in fact that I could barely feel it. Opening my eyes, I swear I could see a tinge of nervousness, but it was gone the moment Dr. De Yong asked a question.

“Did you find anything?” She asked, her back was turned to us, while she typed medical notes into the computer. Dr. De Yong was meticulous and refused to make the same mistakes the doctor’s down south had made that had truly cost my mother her life.

“Nothin’ of medical importance.” Hudson chastised and I finally placed his accent, Irish. It was thicker there then it had been before, but it was still prominent.

My mother and I had travelled a lot in our time together. She was a journalist, and so I was constantly pulled from school to take vacations or to move. I had travelled to so many parts of the world, and there were still so many points I wanted to see. Travelling had been my mother’s pleasure.

“Nice tats.” Hudson added before taking a few paces back to look at the computer with Dr. De Yong.

I frowned looking down at the small images spattered across various and sundry parts of my body while yanking the hospital gown back on. There were only four images ingrained in my skin, and they were relatively small and for the most part meaningless. The first one I got when I was sixteen with my mother, and the one that I had gotten directly after she died.

“I’ll see you in a few months.” Dr. De Yong smiled encouragingly.

“Can’t wait.” Hudson added.

Dr. De Yong nodded before dragging Hudson and her file out of the room. I could hear her giving him an earful outside the door, and I could tell, based on his demeanor in the exam room, that he probably didn’t even give a shit. Weren’t people who were training to be doctor’s, more importantly oncologists, supposed to be sympathetic? They were hanging around dying people.

Leaving the hospital I saw Hudson at the nurses station. He looked up and shouted something, but with my hat pulled over my ears and a quick stride I didn’t really hear him. Soon enough I was in my dinosaur of a vehicle and far away from whoever the hell that guy thought he was.