To Caress My Day

“Tahliah, please don’t leave me. Please, don’t...” Seth weakly pleaded in her hair, his voice sounding broken, and in just as much pain her own heart was. His tears soaked into the curls that were gathered up in her messy bun. He couldn’t allow her to end their relationship, he couldn’t allow her to walk out of his life so easily and simply. If she did…Seth didn’t know how he’d be able to pick himself up off his lawn ever again.

Twigs shook her head in response, and hatefully spat back at him. “And why the hell shouldn’t I?”

Seth didn’t reply right away, rather he took his time to get a more leveled control of his voice so it wouldn’t sound so broken, and pathetic. “Because…I like you more than you think I do. In fact, I’m obsessed with everything that makes you, you. I love your big brown pixie eyes and how far apart they are. I love the thickness of your brows, and your dark curly hair. I love your full cupid’s bow lips and the taste they give whenever I kiss you. I love your ‘bucktooth teeth’ as you so call it, and the combination of your adorable lisp and your British accent is beyond perfection to me.” He hesitated for a minute before burying his face into the crook of her neck to whisper his confession to her.” And most of all, I’m in love with you.”

Twigs froze in his arms, clearly taken aback by his confession. Seth pressed a few kisses at the back of her head as her delicate curls caressed the last of his tears away. “I’m in love with you, Tahliah Debrett Barnett. God, I’ve been in love with you for such a long time now it’s seems so crazy when I think about it. I mean, when I first realized how I felt about you it was already so early on in our relationship that I was afraid to tell you how I felt because I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, or risk scaring you off. I’ve never fallen so fast for a woman before, so I wasn’t certain if it was even the right time to tell you that I was in love with you yet.” Seth couldn’t help but lightly chuckle to himself as he recalled how he struggled from telling her the truth. “There were so many times I’ve wanted to tell you that I loved you though, every time you were around me, in fact. It felt like I was suffocating whenever I had to force myself to keep quiet about it, like I was keeping a secret I shouldn’t keep, but I told myself it would be worth it. Someday in the future when the right time finally comes around I’d tell you, and you’d finally know how I felt about you.” With a soft sigh, Seth closed his eyes in thought and leaned his forehead against the back of her hair. He wasn’t even certain if right now was even the right time to have told her about his love for her.

In the distance, having overheard everything, Rebecca retreated back into the mansion and through its back doors. In silence, she walked across the lawn towards the house in the far back that her family lived in on her mother’s employer’s property. Originally, she had planned to stay at Seth’s house tonight, but after seeing the chaos she had caused while under the influence of alcohol, she knew it would be best to face her soon-to-be angry parents and own up to her mistakes. Besides, she felt she deserved whatever punishment her parents planned on dishing out anyway, especially after she ruined some kind of secret romance between Seth and his dancing girlfriend.

At exactly that same time, Derek speedily pulled up into the driveway to the rescue. He had already spotted the couple sitting on the lawn together before he parked his car, but when he stepped out of his car he could clearly see that Twigs was crying and trying to pull herself out of Seth’s arms, who refused to let her out of his desperate hold. Instead of interfering in the couple’s argument, Derek decided to stay by his car and watch with concern etched across his face. He knew something was wrong when he received a call from Twigs that was filled with tears and several incoherent sentences, but he didn’t think he’d arrive to this kind of a dramatic scene outside in the open.

Before Twigs could begin to struggle in her boyfriend’s arm, the realization had finally sunk into her that Seth could either be telling the truth about Rebecca and his feelings for her, or that he could be lying so he could try and keep her there by reeling her in with promises of love. The problem with that was she couldn’t figure out which scenario Seth was trying to act out, sincerity or lies. Twigs emotions were all over the place as they tried to avert the poisonous arrows of pain that were chasing them, not to mention that she was still reeling over the fact that he had told her he loved her. He had told her he was in love with her. It was something she’s been dreaming of hearing from his lips for what felt like all her life. Finally, FINALLY he said it…but was it true? Yeah sure, it was everything she wanted and more, but was it sincere, or was it a ruse? Twigs squeezed her eyes shut when she couldn’t get her mind to think straight. Seth had told her he loved right after she caught him in his underwear with another much younger woman than herself. He told her RIGHT after it happened, never BEFORE when they were okay.

Now figuring out the answer for herself, and feeling the whip lash of pain in her heart, Twigs began to struggle in her boyfriend’s arms once again. Seth must have known all along that she was in love with him, and was now toying her with it by giving her what he believed she wanted to hear in order to keep her at his side. It was all too clear now. “Let me go, Seth!” She demanded in a firm but shaky voice.

Seth couldn’t believe it. After all that he had said, after confessing his love for her and everything, she still wanted to leave him! Stubbornly shaking his head, he refused her command. “No, I won’t let you go, I can’t. If you leave I’ll…I’ll become nothing.” He had no experience with what death could possibly feel like, but he was certain in his heart that he would find out the moment his hold on her loosened.

Twigs broke out into loud sobs again as her firm voice turned into a shrill plea. “SETH, PLEASE! Let me go.” Her voice choked up at the end, but she was certain he heard her nonetheless.

Seth squeezed his eyes closed to block out the agony consuming his heart. The pain in her voice was more evident than it was before, and it cut into him just as sharply as before. He didn’t think he could stand the sound of her anguish anymore, it would be unbearable to go through that again. Leaning down, Seth greedily inhaled the scent of her jasmine scented curls for what surely would be the last time before he would let her go for good.

Silently, he gradually loosened his tight grip around her waist, his limp arms falling back down to his side in defeat. Twigs was finally free. Not believing it, she simply sat there trying to even out her own breathing. When his arms didn’t come back around her again, she lunge forward to pick up her bag that she had completely forgotten she’d drop when he called her by her pet name, and jumped to her feet. Without a glance, she strode away from Seth and towards Derek and his car.

Derek held the door open for Twigs when she got close enough and gave her a sympathetic smile as she dived into the car without a word. He gently closed the door for her and gave her a moment to cry in the safety of his car while he went to check on his employer. Seth was now standing and facing the car when Derek approached him. “Seth, what the hell is going on here? What happened, man?”

Seth’s eyes had follow Twigs the moment she walked away from him and slipped into the car. Even now, he was staring at her through the dark tinted windows where he knew she was crying behind. He didn’t look at Derek as he clenched his fists and forcefully swallowed the breakdown that was threatening to come out. “Take her home, Derek. Take her away from here.”

Derek shook his head in confusion as he searched Seth’s face for answers. “I still don’t understand, Seth! What happened here tonight? Why was she crying?”

Still not looking at him, Seth responded without emotion. “She doesn’t want to be here anymore. Take her home. That’s an order.”

Heavily sighing, Derek placed his hands on his hips and tried to piece together what could have happened by going back to the beginning. Twigs had been crying when she had called him earlier that night to ask him to come pick her up. He had a hard time understanding some of the things she said, except for her needing a ride, but he was certain whatever the problem was had something to do with Seth. Why else would she be drowning herself in tears in the backseat of his car? The fact that Seth’s eyes evidently appeared bloodshot too, and that he was now staring into the windows of his car like a catatonic statue complied with Derek’s theory, even though the sight of Seth worried him greatly. He’d never seen his employer in this state before, whether it was after a fight with a girlfriend or a full blown breakup. What happened here was so much more than all of that. Giving Seth an obedient nod, Derek placed a supportive hand on his friend’s shoulder. “Alright man, I’ll take her home, but you better expect a call from me later tonight, okay? And you better pick up your damn phone!”

Seth lightly nodded, his eyes still on the side window of Derek’s car where his eyes were able to peek out the shadowed form of the woman he loved hunched over in the backseat. Derek fast walked to the car and jumped in, quickly reversing his car out of Seth’s driveway. He kept his eyes on the back window as he was backing up, and kept his eyes averted from Twigs who refused to sit up, and sneak a last precious glance of the man she loved, who was left standing on his front lawn in his jeans, watching them go. From his property, Seth watched the car drive out of his gate until the red beam of light from the taillights dimmed away into nothing. Then and only did he finally let out a choke gasp that forced his body to bend forward as if he was about to vomit. To fight back his tears, Seth began to blink furiously as his eyes darted around his empty lawn. After what felt like twenty minutes, he pulled his exhausted body together, and stumbled back into the privacy of his empty mansion, alone.

______________________________________________________________________________

In silence, Derek drove Twigs home, which allowed her plenty of time to cry everything out, and pull herself together. She spent most of that ride hunched over sobbing her eyes and lungs empty, but quietly. Every time she thought she was finally calm and collected, letting out small sniffles here and there, the tears would start up again and she’d be right back to where she was before. As they reached town, she forced herself to get herself together more urgently, not wishing to stumble out of the car in front of pedestrians crying like an insane person. When Derek finally pulled his car over by the curb right outside her apartment building, he was finally able to turn around in his seat and looked at her more clearly for the first time that night. To be frank, she looked like hell. “Are you going to be alright, Tahliah?”

Twigs managed a shaky nod, but wouldn’t look him in the eyes as she cleared her throat. “Y-Yeah, I’ll be fine. Simone will home s-so she’ll help me out.”

Derek gave her a sympathetic nod. “You do know that you can call me if you need any help too, you know that right?”

Twigs gave him a weak smile before slipping her sunglasses on so no one would be able to see her bloodshot eyes. “Thank you, but I won’t be going anywhere for the remainder of the night.”

“I didn’t mean just mean chauffeuring.” Derek clarified for her. “My offer stands for anything else you might find yourself needing. A person to talk to, for instance.”

“O-Oh, thank you. I mean it, Derek, I really appreciate it, but I think I’ll be okay for the night. You have a good night too, and tell your wife I said hi.” Twigs sincerely thanked him before hurrying out of his car and heading up the stairs that led to her apartment building.