Blackout

Maybe if I had thought that the ideas that dug themselves into my mind were crazy, I never would have gotten into this mess.

The problem is most people are always looking for the easy way out. And some ways are easier than others, even if it does come with a heavy price. But sometimes the price doesn’t matter when you know you’re going to get exactly what you wanted… Until what you wanted isn’t actually what you want.

I really thought that I knew myself at the time, that I knew exactly what I wanted, and what I needed. But as I do with most things, I changed my mind. Only changing your mind in my situation was easier said than done. I wanted out, and more ideas burrowed deep into my mind and held on tightly until I was becoming someone I wasn’t sure I liked… But I didn’t care, because I was getting what I wanted.

Isn’t that the only thing that matters?

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(Trigger Warning: Abuse, Violence, Gore)