Ethereal

Nina's POV

England

1868

Days had passed. Days had become weeks.

I was not trapped in the Devil's house, though. I had gone back to my home two days after Uriel attacked me. My family had been heavily guarded by Authorities—the lowest ranking Angels—and Lucas thought Dominions were lurking nearby. Despite all the manpower, Lucas had gotten me inside after I practically groveled at his feet.

But what I had found... My parents and sister had been afraid of me. Afraid because of my relationship with Lucas. I tried telling them, tried making them see that the only thing between us was purely educational.

They had not believed me.

My own twin had not believed me when I told her I was still good, the same person from three days before. They thought Lucas had turned me against them. As if I were that easy to manipulate, I thought bitterly.

Lucas and I had fled into Sherwood after Angels filled the house, hunting us. That day, I had become an official enemy of Heaven. It had also been the day my family had turned on me. I had had no choice but to stay with them—Lucas and Romeo—no choice but to evolve and learn about Power, my ability. I needed something to make me feel useful.

Lucas was helping me. Romeo came and went—to where, I did not know.

"You are not focused," Lucas sang ripping a leaf into two equal halves. "You are thinking too much. You need to stop, separate your family troubles from your current—"

"Oh, shut up." I bit, whirling to where he sat, relaxed, against a major oak tree. "It is impossible for me to feel nothing! Unlike you... you... You prat."

Dropping the green halves, Lucas placed a hand over his heart.

"That hurt."

I rolled my eyes staring up at thick oak branches. He made me want to murder people.

"Come now, kitten, no sulking."

I closed my eyes, breathing deeply.

"This is serious. My family turned away from me, they think..."

"You are evil?"

"Basically, yes."

Shifting grass and grovel caused my lids to lift. A gasp whisked past my lips. He was up, standing too close for me to feel safe. In our time together, I had come to learn our proximity was... enervating to my heart. Because it bounced in my chest.

"I do not expect you to understand," I said as he came closer, each step had blood pumping faster through me. "But you should respect other people's feelings."

Lucas' gaze drunk all of me, along my pink gown, the ample cleavage, the slope of my neck, the O shape of my lips—but he stopped on my eyes.

"I do."

I snorted, "Respecting people's feelings does not include mocking them—"

"No," he whispered brashly. "I understand."

I blinked very fast, almost like I had not, because I never lost sight of those mercury pools.

"What are you saying?"

Lucas put his hands on his hips, looking to the side, exhaling. Then, he returned to me.

"I am saying, I know what it feels like to have family turn away from you."

Compassion licked my veins before I drew arms around myself.

"You turned your back on Heaven—not the other way around. You made the wrong choices, no one forced you."

"They were not wrong choices. I would do them again."

"Why does that not surprise me?"

He crossed his arms. The shirt material pulled tautly against his shoulders and peck muscles. I acted like did not notice.

"Heaven was not my family. My brothers' were. I might have refused to serve and protect humanity. I might have incited a human against another—to prove how flawed they are—but I never betrayed my family. I never went behind their backs. I did it all in the light of day." I felt utterly compelled by his voice, low and strong. So certain of what he was saying. "Michael betrayed me. He used our Father's Power of Creation—right before He vanished—and crafted a sword that brands Angels."

"Brands...?"

"By stabbing an Angel with the sword, the Angel's wings writhe into nothing in a matter of seconds and then..."

"Then they Fall." Lucas stayed silent, eyes hooded. My own flickered to the ground, catching sight of a white fist at his side. "Michael was the one who cast you out..."

"Yes, he was. Provided I did wager a war against Angels who agreed with protecting humans. But I never knew he had a sword like that, and he stabbed me—literally—in the back."

I swallowed, "Elia is my twin, though. She should have believed me." My eyes swung to his—what part of this was funny? "You are laughing..."

"I am because it is not different. It is the same." With a sharp turn, humor died from his handsome face. "Michael is my twin. Of course, I am far better looking."

If I had to pinpoint the most uncomfortable moment of my life, this was it.

"Why are you telling me this?"

Lucas flashed me a half-smirk.

"Because sitting around, watching you trying to make sense of your ability is not as entertaining as you might think."

Hope died for something I should not dare hope for in the Devil. I shook my head.

"The prince of darkness is a gentleman."

A black eyebrow arched down at me.

"Quoting King Lear to me? How romantic." I was impressed. He knew Shakespeare's work. Since he hated humans so much, it struck me silly that he would read their work. "But I am a king, not a prince."

"That does not matter. I meant you are a cunning, wooing, manipulative man—"

"You find me wooing?"

I let out a frustrated yelp, smacking a fist into his chest.

"And you are frustrating... And... Stop laughing!" I beat his shoulders, barely making him sway. It irked me further. I pulled on my Power—I grabbed hold of it, focusing it on my arms and hands, pushing again.

I was startled myself when—this time—he moved. He fell backwards and I toppled over him. His laughter was gone, replaced by bewilderment. His dark hair flung back and my blond hair fell forward, touching the tips of his cheeks.

My hands were braced on Lucas' broad shoulders, but my body was touching his. Everywhere. Our centers were positioned over one another. My breasts were smacked on the hardness of his chest and... There was a burning inside. A hunger.

A coil, down where we were...

Lucas heaved, making no move to push me off. The tingles in my spine were stronger every time we were close, I did not know why they existed, but I could always tell when Lucas was near.

Lucas twitched underneath me. I noticed my hand. It had moved on its own, traveling from his right shoulder to the flushed skin of his neck. With a finger pad I trailed along the silver chain, the one with the enchanted pendant.

"I can... I can feel it."

Lucas pulled out of his daze, slowly.

"What?" his breath caressed my throat.

"I feel something—here. It gets clearer the more I..." I stopped. "I felt this before. With that man—that Fallen I..."

"The Fallen you redeemed?" I nodded. Lucas' alarm registered seconds too late, as did his words. "Etna, stop! If you..."

His words ceased. The last thing I saw was my left hand going inside Lucas' chest—like he was made of air. But I touched something—something only I could touch. Without any doubt, I knew.

It was his soul.

The first time—months ago—I had not known. It had all been too fast. But now I knew, and I felt my Power around me. I moved my fingers—I think—and images I could not control flashed in my mind, like they were my own memories.

But they were not memories. Certainly not mine.

They were all the things he had ever done. Even the things he might have forgotten. Every emotion, every deed was forever imprinted in one's soul and I could see them.

With the other Fallen, I had felt his want for forgiveness. His regret, how he had sought repent everyday after the Fall. So, I had—unknowingly—granted him redemption.

But with Lucas... it was different.

I did not feel remorse. There were brief lived moments of regret, and the good he had done in millennia was fickle. He had slaughtered innocent humans, his own kind, Cambions, Demons, Vampires, Witches... Nephilims. He had not listened to plights, had shown no mercy. Had not hesitated starting wars among humans.

It was a black, black soul.

Yet, I knew I could grant him redemption if I truly desired.

Lucas, though, he did not seek redemption.

Among the darkness was always light—even if it was small—it existed. And his took a shape...

I released the hold on his soul and suddenly, I could see reality once more. I tucked my Power away, breathing fast, pulling my hand from the center of his chest.

Lucas' eyes were wide and staring. It was then I felt wetness run down my face.

"Etna..."

I wiped a water trail with the back of my hand.

"What do you want from me?" I whispered. "Who are you to me...?"

I searched his face for answers. Any would be better than none.

"I... do not know." He husked out, unmoving. "I do not know what I want."

I took hold of his chin, turning his face to mine.

"You are a terrible liar," I lowered my face, feeling the incredible taste of irony—saying the Devil did not know how to lie. "I know you feel it, too. The burning inside..."

Lucas licked his lips—his tongue almost brushed mine.

"I am wrong for you."

"I know," I whispered. "You are also a terrible person and I should hate you. But... I cannot. Because hating you would be hating part of me, would it not?" Our noses grazed at the tips. A deep groan climbed up his throat as I shifted—closing my hips on his. "I saw everything you ever did—when I touched your soul—I felt everything you ever did. A lot of hate and vengeance for Michael and others. Loneliness, sadness, boredom... But there was empathy, compassion—for Gabriel, Romeo—and..."

Our mouths were perfectly aligned, no more than an inch apart.

"And then I felt something deep, strong, wild... I felt that for me." I met his eyes. They were laid bare for me only. I shivered. "That was when I knew, that no matter what you did—or might do—I could never hate you."

My hands clasped his face, I tilted down, meeting his mouth.

There was a moment of hesitance before he kissed me back. Once he did, Lucas' hands curled on my hips.

It was unlike anything I had ever experienced. Up until this moment life had been calm, I had watched and felt everything passively—until now. This was what it felt like—to be alive.

His fingers twined in my hair, pulling me closer, taking away any room for breathing. Lucas kissed me like a man dying of thirst, sucking on my bottom lip, nibbling it between his teeth.

I moved my hands down finding the hem of his shirt. Before I managed to get a good grip on it, he inverted our positions. Lucas hovered me on one knee—it was pressing between my legs, causing the gown to ride up.

"Do you have any idea what you are offering?" one hand landed beside my head, crushing dead leaves. "I am the Devil, all my reasons are unholy, all are self-serving. I will not hesitate to take you, Etna."

I touched his neck—feeling the quickening of his pulse. I had never wanted something or someone as badly as I wanted him. My hands roamed down, I gripped the collar of his shirt and ripped it open. Lucas' mouth came down on the hollow of my throat—I arched, grasping his shoulders. I tugged off the ruined clothing, sending somewhere. His mouth moved lower, pleasure spiked as its warmness reached above my breasts.

Fabric tore in Lucas' own hands.

I shuddered under the quick, hot kisses he continued to trail down my body.

I wrapped my arms around his neck, burying my nose in his hair. An intoxicating smell of leather and summer storm—a very strange combination—invaded me. My cheeks flushed as a moan got out. Muscled arms snuck under and around me, hoisting me off the ground. In less than seconds, we were against the large oak tree.

He held my thighs so hard I thought he would draw blood.

I tracked a path of nibbling kisses down the side of his neck—his collar bone was sensitive, I purred happy with the discovery. I insisted for a little while longer, sucking slowly, taking pleasure in every shudder rolling through his body.

I thought I heard him murmur my name, but then, Lucas pulled us from the tree. Rushes of air later, we were behind doors. He had taken us to the house, to his room—I could only assume—Lucas' lips tasted mine all the way. We sunk the bed and as we moved, it groaned.

A grand-sized bed was groaning with our moving. God.

A warm, slick thing rounded my ear shell and he whispered, "You are beautiful like this. Your body flushed... It gives me many ideas." Heaving breathlessly, I snuck a peek into his eyes.

There was barely controllable lust.

"Why... did you stop?" I barely recognized my voice as I spoke.

A lazy grin shaped his lips. I did something I never had—although, I had never done any of this—and I licked his full bottom lip. Next, a rumbling laugh filled the room.

"My, you are impatient."

I hooked a leg over his hip, propelling him closer. Lucas cupped my left cheek, flinging blond hair away. His expression became quizzical.

"What are you doing to me?" he asked softly, pressing down on me. I could feel his want—I closed my eyes, breathing shallowly.

"Lucas..."

"Tell me what you want, kitten."

I slipped my hands up his sculptured abdominals, lifting my gaze to his.

"I want you."

"Mmm," he mussed. "You could ask for more elaborate things. I will give you anything. Gold, jewels, power—"

"You," I repeated, digging my fingers into his shoulders. "I want you to be mine."

Lucas tensed in a matter of seconds. The lines around his eyes gave out, making him look younger and in that minute I accepted wholeheartedly. I wanted him. But it was more than wanting to taste him, I wanted more than his body. I wanted his dark soul. I wanted his heart.

Just like I knew he wanted me. My everything.

His head bowed so that our mouths grazed, "I think... you already have me."

A shudder wrecked my very soul. A soul that ached for his.

Eyes closed, he leaned his forehead on mine, before taking my mouth in a dance of erotic wonder.

Time seemed to fall away as did the rest of our clothes. Everything we had had covered the floor, torn and ripped apart. Our skins were pink-red from our constant moving together, in a perfect tempo. Lucas had his mouth closed around my left breast, moans shrouded our ears—it drove him deeper, as if all he wanted was for me to feel good. His hand cupped the lonely right breast, rubbing his thumb over the sensitive peak...

Stop, I ordered my Power.

No, this wasn't me. These weren't my memories—I needed to get out. I needed them to stop.

I loved... I needed...

Cameron.

And that word, that single word, brought memories flooding my mind. Cutting off the influence of my ability. Suddenly, I knew I wasn't Etna. I was Nina. And I remembered everything—from wanting to slap Cameron to wanting to kiss him forever.

But... I was still trapped. Etna's memories had vanished, but I could feel something was still wrong.

I could feel my Power gushing all around me. It was out of control. My head was in a doozy after the real-life-memories I'd just seen—lived. Because it felt that way. I didn't have any notion of what happened, it felt like I hadn't been myself, I'd been Etna.

That was both creepy and cool. I had no clue how I could do that.

"You can't."

My heart jumped. In the midst of blackness, a voice, small and young rang behind me. I turned quickly and the sight gave me a stroke.

It was... It was me. Shorter, with longer hair, tiny arms and an adorable round face. An eight year old's face.

It was like staring at a photo-album picture. Mom had kept tons of those.

"Mommy always said not to take pills." Her little voice rang out, hoarse. "She said not to..."

The golden eyes on my much younger-self glinted as she looked up at me in the void of darkness. Just when I was about to ask what she meant, a searing pain came through, cutting through the empty landscape and hitting me everywhere. I was left on my knees, grabbing for my left breast—my heart. But as I coughed and nothing came out, I realized it wasn't only my heart. My ears, eyes and nose were exploding as if something was trying to find its way out of me.

I doubled over, gasping for nothing, because there was no air. I was still under. So was this a nightmare?

The stab in my chest felt pretty real.

Somewhere my Power flared. Warning bells went off and I didn't understand why.

Mini-me came closer, it was like watching someone float.

"Wha... what's... what's happening...?" I wheezed.

She looked down at me with horror stricken eyes and trembling lips.

"Ms. Parker took pills..." My body felt strung out, poked by fire irons. "She died."

Ms. Parker.

She'd been my middle school teacher. The one I'd seen ODing.

An ugly cough tore out of me. The kind you saw in movies right before the character kicked the curb.

"You took pills."

No, I wanted to say, but now the bursting pressure was everywhere. Between two bloody yells, I managed to remember... I took them—the seeds!

They'd been... too many. My body it... It wasn't handling all the extra Power. I was...

"Are we going to end up like Ms. Parker...?"

I shook my head. But the pain wasn't just in my body now, it was all around. All of this was me. I was trapped in my subconscious because the Datura were still in my system.

But what was happening to my dream-body was a reflection of what was happening to me in reality.

I was... dying.

Phillip's POV

"There has to be something you can do..." I breathed, watching Jade wipe Nina's forehead with a wet towel.

I had my fingers locked in hers, still taking the fever into myself. At the rate it came back... I palmed the free hand down my face. This wasn't looking good.

Serena had her arms crossed standing at the foot of bed. Her brows were slammed in deep concentration, her lips all puckered up in a way that gave me dirty ideas.

"There's something. But it might be dangerous."

"I think you should try it."

I agreed with Jade. Nina's nose was still bleeding. Jade had been wiping that, too. The towel was half-blood.

Serena gathered her long blond hair into a ponytail. Her hands ended on her hips.

"I can make Nina vomit the seeds. Any seeds are hard to digest, which means they're still in her stomach." Nina twisted her head pulling our attention to her. I edged closer fanning Nina's hair to the side. "If I'm not careful," she went on, tone softer. "I might burst blood vessels. Or worse."

"Worse?"

She winced.

"Cause a heart attack." Holy Hell. "I've never done it before and I'm afraid to screw up, so, maybe it's better if I don't..."

I was up and in front of her in three seconds. Serena looked up at me, lips slightly apart.

"Hey," I clasped her cheeks. "I've seen you pull off a dark Magic ritual and an exorcism. I trust you, babe." Her fingers wrapped around my wrists—hard. "I believe in you."

Serena took one deep breath, nodding once.

"Okay," her blue eyes became fierce looking over Nina's tired-out body. "I can do this."

"Yeah," I smiled, watching her get her badass game-on. It was so damn hot.

Serena knelt beside the bed, curling up Nina's top exposing her sun-kissed stomach. I trusted Serena—it was true—but this was Nina's life on the line. I couldn't stop myself from being nervous. Nina had become family to me, a sister. And to my brother... He loved her.

"You might want to get a bucket or something." My girl pipped up—wow. My girl. Okay, things were treading into serious territory in my head. Real fast, too.

I ran out of the bedroom, going for the kitchen at high speed. I knew there was a bucket somewhere... I crouched by the cleaning products cabinet. Shifting a box of unopened bleach and some other stuff that I had no idea what was used for, I found a bucket. I raced the way back just in time to see Nina's body kick into gag-reflex.

In a blink, I was steadying her body upward, placing the bucket underneath her mouth. She lurched forward and bile poured into the blue bucket. It was a good thing Nina had cut off her hair, this way it didn't crowd her face as she emptied her stomach.

"It's okay," I whispered in her ear, praying she heard. "Come back, Nina. Please."

Serena's hand fell from my Ex-girlfriend's stomach. Blue eyes found mine.

"Did it work? Are the seeds out?"

I shifted Nina's head onto my shoulder, pressing a quick kiss to her temple before peering into the bucket's contents. There was colorless liquid, but, three little brown oval shaped seeds swam around.

"You got them..." I mumbled, sighing. "You got them."

"Thank God,"

I handed Jade the bucket while lowering Nina back down. Her nose was still bleeding.

"Shouldn't the bleeding have stopped?"

"Getting the seeds out prevents more Power to enter her bloodstream. But they'd been inside her for a long time, they transferred a lot of Power to her..." she paused. "Her body is trying to fight the Power overload the only way it can. By rejecting it."

"Power is anchored to blood... Her body is rejecting blood in order to reject Power."

"Yeah," Serena braced her hands on the mattress. "And if this goes on, she'll bleed out. There's nothing I can do now, it's up to her. I'm sorry, Phillip."

Just as I was about to curse, Nina opened her eyes.

Nina's POV

Fever was clinging to every part of my body. My eyes were swollen and heavy as I opened them. Light stung. I couldn't make out more than outlines, very fuzzy ones. Like looking through distort glass. Their voices were muffles, low and hissed, barely anything.

I was awake... Somehow. Maybe the Datura was out of me?

But then why was I still feeling bucket loads of pain?

"I told you, sunshine. I told you never to take pills."

Out of the haze of faces, the image of my Mom appeared. She looked... God, she looked good. Alive.

A pain deeper than physical squeezed my heart. I moved my lips and all that came out was a wheezy, raspy moan.

"I know, honey," she said, reaching out a hand to cup my cheek. I felt it. It was a cool touch on a burning furnace. "You never wanted to disappoint me. I know. But you've changed. I look at you and I see... I see those you killed. You killed, Nina, in cold blood." Her voice shook. My eyes had been pounding before—now I was one step away from scratching them out. "You did things I never thought you'd be capable of and..." she shook her head and it killed a tiny piece of my heart. Mom's disappointment was staring me in the face. "Look where that's gotten you—suffering. More pain and hurt you could've ever have imagined."

She wiped a bead of sweat from my temple, smiling sadly when I tried to speak again.

"But it's okay now, baby. You can let go."

Let go...

The words echoed inside me. It was strange to consider it. Or maybe not since I felt like death already. And why wouldn't I consider it? I'd been hell and back since Haven Hills became my home. My parents were gone. Nigel, too. There was nothing more here for me—not even a damn house. If I could laugh, I would've. I didn't have my house, it was too pitiful.

"You don't need to hang on any longer, baby. Just close your eyes and give your body a rest." She pleaded with a motherly tone I'd known for years. "You won't need to hurt anymore."

Eyelids lowering, I saw Mom smiling softly.

A hand grasped my too-hot-for-touch fingers, sending my eyelids open.

"You won't hurt anymore because you won't feel anything ever again, you little idiot. You'll be dead and gone. Pain—no matter how much—means you're alive."

Sometimes pain is all you have left. Cam had once said.

Dark midnight eyes captured mine. His fingers were holding on so tight my skin was turning white. My body was beat and yet, I knew this wasn't the real Cam. The lack of tingles made for a cold shower. But then... This wasn't truly Mom.

Probably hallucinations.

That's when you knew it was near. The end.

"You have the right to be tired, honey. Just sleep." Mom whispered soothingly.

Going to sleep... Would be forever. Numbness. Nothing would bother me.

My hand slipped from Cam's grip.

I turned to where Mom was, smiling and inviting, promising a relief for the awful combustive fire in my veins and bones.

"You're taking the easy way out?" Cam said, angry. "I can't believe this—I can't believe you. You're just going to throw everything away because of a little bit of pain?"

I didn't stop. Even when my soul protested, begged me to think.

"I wouldn't quit. I'd fight, I'd hang on—for you."

Those words tossed my heart into a kaleidoscope of raw emotion.

My head twisted towards him—I fought the urge to hurl—and my cheeks were suddenly in his hands and I wanted to lift mine to touch his, but couldn't even push.

"Please don't leave me..." he heaved brokenly.

I did have something to hang on to. And it was the most amazing thing I would ever find. It wasn't painless, far from it, but sometimes love was pain and life was more than often hurtful. While Mom had always urged me to quit on myself, Cam had urged for me to excel, for me to reach full potential and be true to myself.

Our souls were the same and the connection we shared was unbreakable. Something worth living for.

Our love was selfless. We would die for each other.

Our love was selfish. We would live for one another.

Either way, he always chose me.

I always chose him.