You're My Way Home, You're My Backbone.

The house stood oddly silent, probably more silent than when Brendon had been avoiding everyone. There was no pooping from the TV, the fridge was running quietly, the phones were finally silent and there were no sounds of the house settling around him.

He didn’t like it at all. It was unnerving.

It felt like the walls were slowly closing in as the air grew stale; making it harder to breathe the longer he spent in any room. He wanted to get out and go somewhere – anywhere. But he couldn’t because he could only walk so far and wasn’t allowed to drive either, doctor’s orders.

So driving to the icecream shop was ruled out, just as much as walking to the park was. If he had of known being at home would be like this he would have asked Dallon to drop him off somewhere on his way home three hours ago.

Brendon knew this would happen eventually. He knew that his friends couldn’t be around all day, every day when they had things they had to do. Dallon’s short visit this morning was a surprise and very appreciated, he could only stay for about half an hour to drop off a cake his wife made, but it was something. The cake was awesome too, which was an added plus.

It was just that Brendon had hoped that this afternoon or tonight someone could be around to keep him company. Tomorrow is the day of the surgery and having no distractions meant that it was all he could think about.

He attempted watching TV, but nothing interesting was on. He tried singing, playing guitar, napping, have an unnecessary half hour long shower, blasting music from his stereo to see if he could make the walks shake and even flicked through one of his mum’s old cook book for cookie recipes only to find he didn’t have the ingredients to make them. Basically everything other than cleaning.

By the time three o’clock rolled around Brendon had his mobile phone in hand with his thumb hovering over the numbers. He sat there for a few minutes just staring at the screen before flicking it closed and throwing it lighting to the other side of his bed. As much as he wanted to call, he didn’t want to seem annoying or clingy and he felt like he owed then time to do what they wanted, seeing as they spent a lot of time with him over the last week.

Brendon simply didn’t want to be in the way. If his friends had their own things to do then he didn’t want to stop them.

Sighing, Brendon slid off the bed and treaded slowly out of the room heading down the hallway, towards the back of the house. When he reached the laundry, he stopped, looking out the back door into his back yard.

Without a second thought he pulled the doors of the linen cupboard open and grabbed the first light blanket his eyes caught and dragged it outside. It was warm out but not overly hot and the lawn was rough, a little sharp against his bare feet from being so dry. Watering the grass was the last thing on his mind the last couple of weeks, but at least the grass wasn’t all dead.

He limped his way over to the three very short and very skinny palm trees, that were next to the fence line. They created little shade but the best patch of grass was right underneath them. Brendon spread the blanket out and crawled onto it and lied down.

It felt better outside, no walls closing in and fresh air. Well, as fresh as the air could be so close to the city.

Brendon rolled over onto his side, staring blankly across his garden, or where his garden would be if he had the time to plant anything. He wonders that now he was going to be home for a while, if it was worth buying some plants to spruce up his back yard. Just as the thought crossed his mind he decided it would be pointless with going through chemo and possibly having some side effects because he wouldn’t want to be gardening and probably forget to even water it.

He might even be too sick to even bother going shopping for a plant.

It was still hard to think that just a couple of months ago he was jumping all over the stage without a problem and now he couldn’t walk to the park three streets over without someone with him in case his leg played up. Loosing that was a little hard to stomach.

Signing loudly he rolled over onto his stomach letting his face press into the spongy mix of fabric and grass.

Brendon tried not to think about it, and failed.

*
The sound of the back door sliding open sometime in the late afternoon caught Brendon’s attention but he didn’t move nor open his eyes. He hadn’t moved at all from his spot on the ground for the last two hours or so, though the grass was a little itchy, even through the blanket, but it was still quite comfortable. He really didn’t want to move anytime soon.

“Are you awake?”

Brendon opened one eye when a shadow swept over him and blinked hard. Jon offered a small wave before he crouches down next to Brendon’s head.

“Working on your sun tan?” He smiled.

“You could say that.” Brendon smiled back around a yawn.

Jon laughed lightly and left himself fall forwards so he was resting on his knees. Kicking off his thongs, he moved so he was sitting crossed legged with his shadow falling into Brendon’s face. Without having the sun half blinding him, Brendon opened both eyes.

“Busy day?” Brendon asked pushing some hair off his forehead.

“Eh, not really,” Jon shrugged. “I met up with some old friends for lunch that I haven’t see for a while who are holidaying in LA. They wanted me to head out to the clubs tonight with them, but I told them I already had plans.”

Brendon glanced up at Jon and raised an eyebrow in question. Jon raised an eyebrow back, almost looking confused as he pulled on the black strap around his neck. That was when Brendon noticed that Jon had his camera sitting on his lap.

“Didn’t anyone tell you about tonight?” Jon asked, slowly tilting his head to the side like he was trying to get a better look at Brendon’s face.

“Nope, why? What’s tonight?”

“Spencer said he was going to call you.” Jon mused.

“Maybe he did, I’ve been out here since three. I can’t hear the phones ring from here.”

Jon nodded before letting one of his lazy smiles stretch across his face. Brendon turned himself over slowly until he was lying on his side. His eyes brightened up a little.

“We were planning on invading your house, uphold it for ransom while we take over your kitchen, only to probably end up getting take-away ‘cause no one can be bothered to cook and have one awesome slumber party,” Jon beamed. “We tried to get in contact with Zack, but he couldn’t make it.”

“We could always prank call Zack and make him promise to come to the next one.” Brendon suggested with a smirk.

“Then before we go to bed we’ll do each other’s toe nails.”

“Oh, Jon that sounds amazing! I want my nails done pink with purple poker dots.”

Jon laughed tilting his head back and Brendon grinned bright enough to show his teeth. Before Brendon could let the smile fade from his face, Jon pulled his camera up and took the lens cover off. Brendon kept the smile on his face as Jon focused the camera and took the shot.

Jon lowered the camera and displayed the picture, checking it, and then turned it around for Brendon to see. Though Jon’s shadow was covering his face and the sun’s light dulling as it set, the photo turned out great. Brendon gave Jon a thumbs up just as the back door slid open roughly.

The two of them snapped their heads up to see Spencer step out onto the veranda. When Spencer looked up, he froze for a moment and let his shoulders drop letting out a deep breath. He reached behind himself to push the door shut and padded across the grass.

“Where have you been?” Spencer asked looking down at Brendon frowning. “I’ve been trying to call you for three hours. I though you fell over again or something and actually broke your tail bone this time.” He sighed.

“I’ve been out here all afternoon. Sorry.” Brendon reached out to grab Spencer’s ankle as that was the closest thing he could reach. “I can’t hear my phone from here and I think my Mobil is on my bed.”

“It was.”

Spencer pulled his leg free and toed his shoes off before stepping into the blanket. He sat down next to Jon placing Brendon’s phone in the middle of them. The device beeped signalling that it had missed calls and Brendon gave it a little nudge like that will keep it quiet, then picked it up and pressed a couple of buttons.

Brendon snapped his phone shut and skid it across the blanket making it stop on the other side of Jon as he rolled onto his back. He looked up at Spencer apologetic, who ruffled Brendon’s hair in return.

“How long have you been here?” Spencer asked turning to face Jon.

“About ten minutes, Ryan dropped me off on his way to the supermarket,” Jon smirked. “He’s got a list about as long as his foot of food to get.”

Brendon snorted a laugh as Spencer laughed openly leaning backwards onto his arms. Pulling at the strap on his neck, Jon lifted his camera off and placed it on top of Spencer’s shoes. He moved and squirmed around until he had his head resting on Brendon’s stomach with his feet in Spencer’s lap. Brendon raised his head to look at Jon and got an eye full of sun now that Jon wasn’t blocking the rays.

“Comfortable there?”

“Very.” Jon smiled letting his eyes slide close.

Laughing Brendon let his head fall back and brought his hand up to card through Jon’s hair. Before Brendon could drop his hand back down Spencer suddenly reached out wrapping his fingers around Brendon’s wrist. He pulled Brendon’s long sleeve shirt up a little exposing a new half formed bruise on his forearm.

“What’s that from?” He asked gently running a finger over the tender skin.

Brendon bit down on his lip sharply as he let out a long breath through his nose. He can’t anything anymore, he was starting to realise. Then again there was no point is doing so, was there?

“I kind of stumbled this morning and wacked my arm on the corner of my bedside table,” He muttered slightly embarrassed. “When I was trying to get dressed.”

He pulled his arm back and pulled the fabric back down. Jon tried to catch a glimpse but couldn’t see anything.

“It’s only a little mark.”

Brendon shrugged the best he could while lying down. He suddenly flashed a grin up at Spencer and tilting his head back so Spencer kind of looked up side down but on the side at the same time.

“Could that count as a battle scar? So I can go and woo Ryan when he gets here with how awesome I am?”

Spencer snorted and Jon burst out laughing scaring a bird that happened to be sitting on the fence that no one noticed was there, which just made Brendon laugh harder. Jon could feel the vibrations where his head was resting on Brendon’s stomach as he watched the bird fly out of view.

Spencer rolled his eyes, but fondly. He flicked Brendon on the ear and chuckled when Brendon yelped. Brendon pawed back, much like a kitten would and completely missed Spencer’s hand all together. Pouting Brendon dropped his hands in defeat.

The three of them went quiet for a long while. Brendon and Jon laid there with their eyes shut to the sun and Spencer picked at the grass, placing the blades onto Jon’s stomach without him noticing.
Spencer was starting to cover Jon’s chest when car tires turning on gravel could be heard from the front of the house.

“I’m guessing that would be Ryan,” Jon stated without opening his eyes.

“Yep,” Spencer chirped raining another handful of grass onto Jon’s chest.

Brendon cracked an eye open and when he realised what Spencer was doing, he tried not to laugh. Spencer grinned at him and stood up, picking up his shoes and Jon’s camera as he did.

“I’m going to help Ryan. If you two want food you will have to get up and come inside.”

As Spencer walked away Brendon nudged Jon making him sit up. Jon looked down at his lap and chuckled, brushing the grass away. He gave Brendon a sideways glance raising an eyebrow.

“Don’t look at me like that. Blame Spence.”

“I’m not some type of goat, Smith!” Jon yelled.

Brendon smiled when he could hear Spencer laughing from inside, before a couple of his kitchen cupboards slammed shut. Yawning, he linked his fingers together and stretched his arms over his head, feeling a few joins pop.

Suddenly Jon’s hand was hovering above him and Brendon took it letting himself be pulled up. He stumbled a little, which by now wasn’t surprising in the least. Jon scooped up the blanket before Brendon could and headed back inside.

“Just leave it on the washing machine.” Brendon said to Jon as he closed the back door and locked it.

He took Jon’s hand and led him to the kitchen once Jon put the blanket down. They swung their arms back and forth smiling like couple of five year olds. Once they were in the kitchen Brendon for a split second whet to jump on Ryan and Spencer like he would normally do about now, but thought better of it when he felt the fabric of his pants brush against his leg.

Instead he pulled the sleeve of his shirt up without letting go on Jon’s hand.

“Hey Ry, look.” He said twisting his arm around enough so Ryan could see.

Ryan turned away from the microwave, where a bag of popcorn was popping and looked at Brendon amused.

“Look, battle scars! Am I wooing you yet?”

Spencer slapped his hand over his mouth and turned to the sink snickering quietly as Ryan blinked surprised. Brendon smiled sweetly and tried not to laugh himself.

Ryan slowly broke into a smile and shook his head.

“Sorry, not good enough. It needs to be at least twice that size to even get me to sweat.” Ryan smirked leaning against the bench top.

They both managed to look at each other calmly for about five seconds before they both fell into giggles. The microwave beeped just as everyone in the room started to calm down and Ryan turned opening the door. Jon let go of Brendon’s hand and opened the cupboard to grab the biggest bowl he could find.

Once the popcorn was in the bowl Brendon reached over taking a handful ignoring Spencer’s attempts at pushing his hands away. He just smiled before shoving half into his mouth as Spencer made a face, handing him a can of cool drink from the fridge.

When Spencer shut the fridge Brendon saw the ruffled page the doctor gave him about the operation, stuck on with magnets. Sighing he turned on his heal and headed into the lounge room, ignoring all looks he was getting.

Jon followed him out and sat next to him on the couch.

“You alright?” He asked softly.

“Yeah, I just don’t want to think about tomorrow.” Brendon frowned before looking over the top of the couch towards the kitchen. “Stop hogging the popcorn!”

“Well that’s what tonight is for, at least that’s the plan anyway,” Jon smiled bumping his shoulder against Brendon’s. “Try not to stress over it much, stressing won’t help anything.”

Just then Ryan and Spencer walked in placing popcorn, drinks and a small stack of DVD’s on the coffee table. Brendon showed a small smile and bumped Jon’s shoulder back.

“So are you really going to paint my toe nails or am I getting excited over nothing?”

Jon half choked on the food in his mouth and Brendon fell sideways on the couch, his laugh echoing in the room.