You're My Way Home, You're My Backbone.

The beeping of a car horn had Brendon swearing and trying to push himself up off the bathroom floor. He’s head felt light and stomach heavy, though it was empty as he moved, stumbling out the doorway and smacking shoulder first into the doorframe. Groaning he rubbed the new sore spot.

Trying to be quick as he could, which wasn’t all that fast to be honest; he grabbed the paperwork off the kitchen table as well as his phone and keys. The car horn sounded again just as he reached the front door. Once outside, he shuddered violently at the burst of cold wind and fought to lock the door with shaky hands.

The car horn beeped again and Brendon weakly flipped the person off over his shoulder as he tried to get the key in the lock. After the fourth shot, he managed to get it right and finally got it locked.
He headed over to the car parked on his front lawn and just as he reached out for the doorhandle, the car horn went off again making him jump.

“Sorry!” Kenny chuckled as Brendon pulled the car door open. “That one was an accident.”

“’s ok.” Brendon mumbled sliding into the car, closing the door. “Thanks for picking me up on short notice.”

“No problem, I was headed towards the hospital area anyway. I have a cut on my leg that’s infected and the cream the doctor gave me the other day isn’t work-“

Noticing the pause, Brendon looked up from the seatbelt to see Kenny staring at him with wide eyes.

“Are you alright? You’re looking horribly pale, Bren.” Ken asked bitting his lip, something he did when he was worried.

“I’ve been throwing up all morning, that’s probably why.” Brendon sighed.

Frowning, Ken reached out to touch Brendon’s forehead. His frown deepened as he moved his hand back and Brendon’s eyebrows knotted in confusion.

“You a bit too warm for being so pale.”

Brendon was really confused then, he felt cool and when he twined his hands together his fingertip were cold. Kenny turned away and started driving down the road. Brendon pulled the sun visor down and used the little mirror to check his reflection, the second he caught sight of how bad he looked, he snapped the visor up and sunk down in the chair.

Ken glanced at him from the corner of his eye but Brendon was looking out the window at the passing houses.

“Are you sure you’re alright?” Kenny asked, slowing the car down a little bit, in case he had to pull over. “Bren?”

“No,” Brendon said talking a slow breath. “But I’ll be ok. I just want to get this test over and done with.”

“Do you have anyone planned to take you home?”

Brendon shook his head. He hadn’t thought that far ahead. Apart from hovering in the bathroom for most of the morning, all Brendon has done was call the pathology waiting room to see how long the wait for tests are, then re-dialled the last person who called his mobile, which happened to be Kenneth.

He even still had his pyjama on.

“I’m seeing the on-call doctor so I don’t know how long I will be. Maybe text me when you’re done?” Kenny suggested. “If I’m almost ready to leave I’ll pick you up, of if I get out before you do I’ll just head straight over to the hospital.”

Brendon nodded in agreement and patted down his pockets to check for his phone, only to realise it was still sitting in his lap with the house keys.

“If you don’t want to wait for me and get someone else to pick you up, text me to let me know, alright?” Ken said taking a left turn at a set of lights just before they turned yellow.

“If you’re not in the waiting room, I’ll text you and work it out from there.” Brendon said, checking his phone to make sure it had enough battery power.

Kenny nodded, glancing over at Brendon and frowned before turning his attention back to the road. In Kenny’s opinion Brendon looked like death all warmed up, it was a worrying sight. Brendon has been pale a lot lately but not like that.

It took only a couple more minutes before they reached the hospital. Ken slowed the car to a stop at the drop off bay close to the main doors as possible. Brendon’s stomach curled at the sight, he had to take a couple of deep breaths to settle it.

He slid out of the car door and turned to flash a quick smile.

“Thanks,”

“You ok to get there by yourself?” Kenny asked as Brendon turned back around.

Brendon suddenly swayed a little on his feet, grabbing the door tightly to keep his balance. Black dots swirled in his vision for a moment and he wonder if he turned around too fast. It feeling faded quickly and he blinked slowly before shutting the car door. Kenny quickly wound down the window and leaned across the seats.

“Brendon-“

“I’m fine. I’m fine, I’ll text you.” He said a little weakly but stubbornly.

Kenny hesitated for a second, but nodded and slowly drives away while continuously glancing back in the revision mirror. Brendon watched him go until a burst of wind almost blew the piece of paper from his hand. He shuddered against the cold air and went inside to escape it only to be blasted freezing air as he passed under the vents above the door. He fucking hated those things.

The pathology waiting was almost empty; there was an older man with who Brendon guessed was his granddaughter reading a book together in the corner and a lady dressed in a neat suit glaring at the door into the test room impatiently. None of them paid any mind to Brendon as he pressed the button by the door and sat down on the other side of the waiting area, away from them.

The little looked up at as he seated, watching him curiously. He smiled politely and she beamed back before continuing reading her book.

Just a couple of minutes later the door opened and a lady Brendon somewhat recognised walked out, glancing around the room until her eyes fell on Brendon. He was pretty sure her name was Anna, or was that the other lady that worked here?

“Good morning, do you have the paperwork from your doctor?” She greeted, smiling softly.
Brendon nodded and handed over the sheet of paper.

“Thank you. The wait shouldn’t be long.” She said walking back through the door, closing it from behind.

The impatient woman huffed and slid down in her seat. Taking a deep breath, Brendon shifted around and closed his eyes. He could feel himself shake slightly now, if it was from being cold or what, he didn’t know. His stomach was knotting up and his head felt light. In fact he sort of felt a little faint but having his eyes closed help the feeling dissipate.

The last time Brendon could remember feeling light headed like this was when he had the flu last year and it worried him. Something didn’t feel right.

Brendon could feel himself start to drift off just as the door opened and an older lady walked out. The man and kid stood up, greeting her and then all left together. On the way out the little girl smiled at Brendon again and he smiled back but he doubt it was very bright.

The impatient lady was called next leaving Brendon alone in the waiting room. He closed his eyes again and leant his head back until it was touching the wall behind the chair. It took another ten-fifteen minutes before the lady walked back out, all but running down the hallway once she was out of the waiting area.

“Your turn.” Anna grinned holding the door into the test room open.

Brendon pushed himself out of the chair and walked slowly into the next room. The smell of bleach was thick and the moment it hit Brendon felt even worse. He swayed on his feet for a second but Anna didn’t notice, too busy writing in her clipboard.

“I’m sure you know the routine by now, take a seat and I’ll get you all set up.”

“Can I get it lying down today?” Brendon asked sounding raspy.

Anna started to clear away the stuffed toys off the bed, but paused when she finally took a proper look at Brendon. The cheerful look on her face washed away replaced by a frown.

“You look horribly sick today, is everything ok?” She asked stepping forward and placed her hand on Brendon’s forehead when he didn’t back away from the touch. “You’re quite warm.”

“I’ve been sick all morning.” Brendon muttered moving away when she dropped her hand and sat on the bed.

“Do you feel well enough to have the test done?” She asked concerned.

Brendon nodded slowly and after a second of hesitation Anna finished cleaning off the bed. With her steady hand holding his arm, Brendon carefully climbed onto the bed and slowly lied down. The faint feeling faded a little once his head rested back against the pillow.

“Have you had anything to drink before coming here?” Anna asked as she wrapped a strap around Brendon’s arm and pressed two fingers to Brendon arm feeling for a vein.

Brendon nodded and hoped the glass or two of water he had managed to keep down would be enough. Anna seemed to have found something and reached out for her trolley. Brendon quickly averted his eyes towards the pictures of African animals stuck on the wall above the bed.

The sharp prick of the needed had him wincing and trying not to tense up his arm. For a small needle it really hurt this time. Then Anna said something he really didn’t want to hear.

“Sorry, that vein isn’t going to work, I’ll have to try again.”

Brendon groaned and closed his eyes. Today was not his day.

It took three attempts to find a vein that would give enough blood before shrinking back. The whole time Brendon lied there, facing away with his eyes squeezed shut, his free hand screwing the corner of his shirt into a ball, creasing the fabric.

A sudden wave of nausea swelled in Brendon’s stomach as Anna finally pulled the needle out and pressed a cotton ball to the skin. Her eyes widened when she looked up and noticed that Brendon’s face was swiftly turning from a pale white to grey.

“Are you al-“

“I think I’m going to be sick.” Brendon gasped out, already rolling onto his side.

Leaping away from the bed, Anna managed to snag an empty bowl off the bench and to Brendon just as he threw up, more dry reaching then anything, holding his stomach tightly. Brendon could feel his stomach muscles pull painfully from being sick earlier and curled into himself to ease the pain.

Anna called out for Thomas and pushed the trolley out of the way. Brendon hardly noticed Thomas entering the room as he slumped back onto the bed and let his eyes slip shut. Black spots danced under his closed eye lids and he guessed the way he was gasping for air was the cause of that. Someone pressed a cool hand against his forehead.

People were talking but he completely missed what was being said. Suddenly there was a loud beep followed by something cold pressing against his ear. He tried to curl away from it.

“It’s ok. I’m just going to take your temperature. Hold still if you can.” Anna murmured turning Brendon’s head slightly for a better position.

The temp reader beeped loudly in his ear and Brendon winced at the sound that felt like it was echoing off the inside of his skull. Flickering his eyes open, the first things he noticed was Anna’s worried look as she read the medical equipment.

Brendon started to panic a little. This wasn’t like his usual post chemo sickness his temperature has never changed from it before, even on the really bad days. Something defiantly wasn’t right.

Anna leant down to his eyes level and made sure he was looking straight at her before she spoke.

“You’re temperature is very high. Do you feel dizzy or light headed?” She asked, eyes darting around like she was scanning his face.

“Yes, more light headed. Stomach huts too.” Brendon half whispered.

Anna nodded and moved away from the bed, leaving the bowl with Brendon and talked quickly with Thomas. The nurse took the trolley away into the back room as Anna grabbed the phone off the wall.

Brendon closed his eyes, only to open them again when Anna placed her hand lightly on his arm. She was starting to look a little fuzzy, like the light in the room was too bright for the small space.

“Do you want to go down to the emergency ward? As only a Pathologist I cannot force you to go, but I strongly recommend that you do, even more so with the temp you have.” Anna said holding the phone tightly in her right hand. “I can call them right now and get someone to take you down there.”

Brendon let the words sink in and sighed. This was something he was trying to avoid happening; another say in hospital. But in the back of his mind he knew it was on the cards that moment he got out of Kenny’s car.

Brendon breathed out a ‘yeah’ and Anna wasted no time in making the call. Before Anna could get the call transferred to the emergence department Brendon was leaning over the edge of the bed again holding the bowl in a death grip.

*

By the time Brendon gotten to the emergency ward with the help of Thomas pushing him in a wheelchair, Brendon could barely keep his eyes open against the harsh lights.

Thomas helped him out of the wheelchair and onto a bed. Brendon was about to say thank you when his phone beeped, making him startle. He managed a small wave to Thomas as the man left before digging his phone out from his pocket. If the lights were blinking enough the phone screen was worse.

“You’ll have to turn that off, sorry.” A nurse said suddenly appearing from around the side of the bed holding a damp cloth.

Brendon blinked hazily at her and held the phone out.

“I think it’s from my friend who was meant to pick me up,” He said voice raspy from throwing up. “Can you text him back...tell him I’m here. Please?”

The nurse gently took the phone once she placed the cloth over Brendon’s forehead and started tapping away looking unsure.

Sinking back into the pillows, Brendon closed his eyes. He knew it wasn’t a good idea to drift off but let himself anyway.

*

“Wake the fuck up!”

Ryan, who had been sleeping on the couch, jumped in shock and almost tumbled off head first. Saving himself purely out of reflex by grabbing onto the coffee table in a very awkward position, he looked up, catching a blurry glimpse of someone that looked like Spencer running into his kitchen.
Having no other choice, Ryan let himself fall to the ground with a loud thump and stumbled to his feet.

“What are you doing?” He asked around a yawn. “You better not be messing up my kitchen, I just spent ages cleaning it.”

“Please tell me you have a key to Brendon’s house and know where it is.” Spencer called out not quiet answering the question.

Ryan sighed and walked into the kitchen. It wasn’t anything new to find Spencer turning up randomly and making himself at home, but seeing him go through everything on the bench tops and move stuff around clearly looking for something, was defiantly weird.

Ryan frowned and leaned against the door frame.

“I do and it should be in the little container on top of the fridge. Under the paper. What are you doing?” Ryan repeated watching as Spencer dropped the stuff in his hands and went to the fridge.

Spencer found the key and turned to Ryan. Ryan froze at the look in Spencer eyes, the same look he had when he turned up at Brendon’s house after Ryan called him about the tumour. The same look he always got in his eyes when something bad was happening.

“Kenny called and told me Bren’s in hospital.” Spencer said looking extremely worried. “He’s really sick.”

Ryan’s eyes went wide and after standing frozen there for a moment; he sprung back to life as Spencer grabbed his wrist, pulling him to the already open front door. He managed to garb his jacket and keys before he was pulled out the house.

“We need to go to Brendon’s house and get him some stuff before we go to the hospital. Ken said the doctor is talking about keeping him in.”

Ryan nodded and slid into Spencer’s car, hoping it wasn’t serious as it sounded.