Tick Tock Bang
Chapter Two
“Mikey…” Gerard repeated in despair, wiping away a tear.
“Gee…” croaked Mikey.
“Man… I…” he shook his head. “How’re you doin’?”
“Ah, same old,” Mikey chirped cheerfully back, once again putting on a brave face. “Pretty crap though, I guess…” his voice faded, and he paused. “How are you?”
Gerard shrugged. “Fine.”
Mikey’s face looked hurt, and he sank back onto his pillows. There was a long silence.
“Quit lying,” he whispered
“What?” said Gerard, a little too quickly.
“You don’t need to lie to me anymore, Gerard. Frank told me yesterday.”
Bastard!
He gritted his teeth. Mikey stared at him.
Gerard swallowed.
“He… he did?”
“Yes.”
“Oh…” he stuttered. “How… how much did he tell you?”
“Everything.”
Gerard stared, horrified, at his brother, who’s face grew taunt and pained. He bit his lip.
“Gerard…” Mikey began in disbelief. “I just… don’t believe it,” he shook his head, fractionally. “You… you promised me it would never happen again.”
“I know, I know, Mikey, but-” Gerard faltered and stared at the floor.
“Goddamit, Gee!” Mikey burst out suddenly. Gerard jumped in surprise. “You can’t just rely on drugs! Its not gonna help at all!”
“Mikey, I’m-”
“STOP!”
The two brothers glared at each other, both close to tears, both shaking. The room would have been icily silent, had it not have been for Mikey’s heart monitor starting to bleep dangerously out of control. His breathing was fast, and staggering, but in less than ten seconds he was surrounded by nurses. Quickly and quietly, they slid around Gerard and glided over to the patient. One held him down while the other inserted a long needle into his skin. Gerard, who had remained frozen, winced.
Slowly, his brother’s breathing became steady.
After checking the monitors for one last time, the small, younger nurse turned impatiently to the taller man behind her and glared at him over her thin glasses.
“Mr Way, sir, I know you’re a relative but if you continue to disturb my patient I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to leave the ward.”
Gerard nodded nervously.
After giving one last, stressful glance at Mikey, she abruptly tossed her head and strutted out of the doors in a huff.
Sighing, Gerard turned back to his brother.
To his surprise, Mikey was smiling.
“Bitch,” he whispered, giggling.
“God, Mikey!” Gerard grinned back, “if I were her patient, I would rather die than have to put up with her.”
The laughter faded. Mikey’s face became serious once again.
“Please, Gerard.”
“Jeez, Mikey, you sound like Mom,” he added quickly after seeing Mikey’s stern face. “Alright, okay, I promise I won’t touch them again.”
“You swear?”
Gerard placed his sweaty hand on Mikey’s cold, clammy arm.
“I swear.”
Mikey searched Gerard’s face for a few moments, but was too tired to argue, and relaxed back onto his pillow, staring at the ceiling.
For the next hour, Gerard stayed by Mikey’s side, listening to his rhythmic, but alarmingly slow breathing. Far from soothing him, he grew more and more tense; praying that the last one he heard would be followed by another.
“Ge…Gera…” Mikey whispered. Gerard’s head snapped up.
“Yeah?”
“Are you afraid of dying?”
A lump rose painfully in Gerard’s throat, but he forced it back down.
“Not really,” he lied. “Are you?”
Mikey broke into a sob.
“Yes.”
At once, Gerard took his brother’s hand, tightly, urgently.
“No.”
“It’s coming, Gee.” Mikey’s voice cracked weakly. “I can feel it. Any second now, I feel like my heart just give up.” He added bitterly. “There’s no point in even trying to stay alive. I’m gonna die in this bed today. Tomorrow, perhaps, if I’m lucky.”
“Shut up, Mikey.” Gerard whimpered.
“But it’s true.”
“Just shut up.”
“Gerard, I’m gonna d-die and there’s n-nothing you c-can do about it anymore.” He sighed. “I love you, Gee,” he breathed.
“I love you too, Mikey."
And with that, Gerard gently wrapped his arms around Mikey and remained there, long after Mikey’s eyes had closed.
Long after the heart monitor had flatlined.
Long after his chest had stopped rising.
Long after the bitch of a nurse had kindly tried to prise him away.
“He’s gone now, sir. I’m so sorry.” Her eyelashes were wet with tears, and she blinked.
“Fuck off,” Gerard replied. She hesitated, then turned away and padded softly out of the ward.
Long after all the heat had left his body.
Long after the tears had dried up, staining his cheeks.
Long after the sky outside became dark.
Finally, Gerard managed to release himself from the cold corpse of his brother and walk out of the hospital.
He ran stiffly to his car.
He turned the key.
The engine spluttered to life. He put it into gear and slammed his foot onto the accelerator.
He pulled up to his drive and stepped out.
He clicked the front door open, stepped inside, and immediately turned to sprint up the stairs, tears now gushing down his cheeks.
He shoved the door of his room open, stumbling blindly over comic books, and yanked open a drawer.
With a violently shaking hand, he drew out a small gun, plus a thick wad of suicide notes.
Slowly, he held the gun against his neck.
He squeezed his eyes shut, sobbing.
BANG
“Gee…” croaked Mikey.
“Man… I…” he shook his head. “How’re you doin’?”
“Ah, same old,” Mikey chirped cheerfully back, once again putting on a brave face. “Pretty crap though, I guess…” his voice faded, and he paused. “How are you?”
Gerard shrugged. “Fine.”
Mikey’s face looked hurt, and he sank back onto his pillows. There was a long silence.
“Quit lying,” he whispered
“What?” said Gerard, a little too quickly.
“You don’t need to lie to me anymore, Gerard. Frank told me yesterday.”
Bastard!
He gritted his teeth. Mikey stared at him.
Gerard swallowed.
“He… he did?”
“Yes.”
“Oh…” he stuttered. “How… how much did he tell you?”
“Everything.”
Gerard stared, horrified, at his brother, who’s face grew taunt and pained. He bit his lip.
“Gerard…” Mikey began in disbelief. “I just… don’t believe it,” he shook his head, fractionally. “You… you promised me it would never happen again.”
“I know, I know, Mikey, but-” Gerard faltered and stared at the floor.
“Goddamit, Gee!” Mikey burst out suddenly. Gerard jumped in surprise. “You can’t just rely on drugs! Its not gonna help at all!”
“Mikey, I’m-”
“STOP!”
The two brothers glared at each other, both close to tears, both shaking. The room would have been icily silent, had it not have been for Mikey’s heart monitor starting to bleep dangerously out of control. His breathing was fast, and staggering, but in less than ten seconds he was surrounded by nurses. Quickly and quietly, they slid around Gerard and glided over to the patient. One held him down while the other inserted a long needle into his skin. Gerard, who had remained frozen, winced.
Slowly, his brother’s breathing became steady.
After checking the monitors for one last time, the small, younger nurse turned impatiently to the taller man behind her and glared at him over her thin glasses.
“Mr Way, sir, I know you’re a relative but if you continue to disturb my patient I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to leave the ward.”
Gerard nodded nervously.
After giving one last, stressful glance at Mikey, she abruptly tossed her head and strutted out of the doors in a huff.
Sighing, Gerard turned back to his brother.
To his surprise, Mikey was smiling.
“Bitch,” he whispered, giggling.
“God, Mikey!” Gerard grinned back, “if I were her patient, I would rather die than have to put up with her.”
The laughter faded. Mikey’s face became serious once again.
“Please, Gerard.”
“Jeez, Mikey, you sound like Mom,” he added quickly after seeing Mikey’s stern face. “Alright, okay, I promise I won’t touch them again.”
“You swear?”
Gerard placed his sweaty hand on Mikey’s cold, clammy arm.
“I swear.”
Mikey searched Gerard’s face for a few moments, but was too tired to argue, and relaxed back onto his pillow, staring at the ceiling.
For the next hour, Gerard stayed by Mikey’s side, listening to his rhythmic, but alarmingly slow breathing. Far from soothing him, he grew more and more tense; praying that the last one he heard would be followed by another.
“Ge…Gera…” Mikey whispered. Gerard’s head snapped up.
“Yeah?”
“Are you afraid of dying?”
A lump rose painfully in Gerard’s throat, but he forced it back down.
“Not really,” he lied. “Are you?”
Mikey broke into a sob.
“Yes.”
At once, Gerard took his brother’s hand, tightly, urgently.
“No.”
“It’s coming, Gee.” Mikey’s voice cracked weakly. “I can feel it. Any second now, I feel like my heart just give up.” He added bitterly. “There’s no point in even trying to stay alive. I’m gonna die in this bed today. Tomorrow, perhaps, if I’m lucky.”
“Shut up, Mikey.” Gerard whimpered.
“But it’s true.”
“Just shut up.”
“Gerard, I’m gonna d-die and there’s n-nothing you c-can do about it anymore.” He sighed. “I love you, Gee,” he breathed.
“I love you too, Mikey."
And with that, Gerard gently wrapped his arms around Mikey and remained there, long after Mikey’s eyes had closed.
Long after the heart monitor had flatlined.
Long after his chest had stopped rising.
Long after the bitch of a nurse had kindly tried to prise him away.
“He’s gone now, sir. I’m so sorry.” Her eyelashes were wet with tears, and she blinked.
“Fuck off,” Gerard replied. She hesitated, then turned away and padded softly out of the ward.
Long after all the heat had left his body.
Long after the tears had dried up, staining his cheeks.
Long after the sky outside became dark.
Finally, Gerard managed to release himself from the cold corpse of his brother and walk out of the hospital.
He ran stiffly to his car.
He turned the key.
The engine spluttered to life. He put it into gear and slammed his foot onto the accelerator.
He pulled up to his drive and stepped out.
He clicked the front door open, stepped inside, and immediately turned to sprint up the stairs, tears now gushing down his cheeks.
He shoved the door of his room open, stumbling blindly over comic books, and yanked open a drawer.
With a violently shaking hand, he drew out a small gun, plus a thick wad of suicide notes.
Slowly, he held the gun against his neck.
He squeezed his eyes shut, sobbing.
BANG