My Little Star

“Zack, can we talk for a second?”

Normally that question wouldn’t serve to completely freak out the twenty-four-year old, but there was something in those words that had his blood turning cold in his veins. Maybe it was the fact that Jordan had never uttered that sentence to him in their time of being together, or maybe it was how nervous and jittery the younger sounded, but whatever it was, it had his mind racing to some pretty horrid conclusions.

Nevertheless, he looked up from his phone and towards the kitchen’s doorway, nodding as he shut the device off and gestured to the seat across the table from where he was sat.

Jordan ambled fully into the room with Backpack, his small dog, in tow. Once the younger man had sat himself in his seat and made himself a little more comfortable (though still looking slightly more awkward than ever), Backpack was picked up and placed in his lap.

The dog didn’t do much as he was manhandled around in his owner’s arms, and after a few moments, even Jordan became bored of what little reaction he was receiving from his pet. With a heavy sigh, he was glancing up at his boyfriend through his fringe.

“You know I love you, right?” he asked, and those few words had Zack’s heart plummeting, though he wasn’t totally sure why. Love was a good thing, right? Maybe he’d just seen one too many movies that resulted in a break-up due to that one line. All the same, he gave a numb nod. “I would do anything for you—anything to make you happy; to keep you mine.”

“Of course, Beany. I’m... I would do anything for you, too. You know I would. Anything for you,” Zack agreed, reaching across the table for his boyfriend’s (ex’s?) hand to tangle their fingers together tightly. “I love you, more than everything.”

Jordan smiled at that before he squeezed at the hand clutched in his own. Then he was taking another calming breath to ask, “Anything? You would do anything for me? Anything to make me happy?”

Oh, God, Zack thought. He wants to take a break; see other people.

“It’s just that we’ve been together for such a long time now, and I wouldn’t be asking you this if you didn’t mean a lot to me, and, I don’t know, what I’m trying to say is... will you become a vegetarian for me?”

And just like that, time seemed to stop.

“You... you want me to what?” Zack asked. He had to make sure he’d heard his partner correctly. After all, didn’t he want to take a break?

“I know this is a lot for me to ask on such short notice, but it would mean so much to me,” Jordan continued. “You don’t even have to just jump right into it; you can take it a little at a time at first. You can think about it some if you want to. I’m not gonna force you, and I won’t leave you if you decide against it, but just know that this is important to me, okay?”

Zack was still staring at his boyfriend as the younger’s mini-speech finally came to an end. He was waiting for something to be said—or maybe for his hand to be let free—when the larger male started to laugh a little breathlessly.

“Hell, Beany, I thought you were gonna break-up with me or something,” he admit with a shake of his head to help clear his nerves. “Is that it? You just want me to eat less meat? That’s all you had to say. If it’ll make you happy, of course I’ll do it.”

Jordan grinned before standing from his seat to move around the table with Backpack still in his arms. Zack knew what he wanted and moved his own seat away from the table to allow his partner to sit sideways across his lap. A short kiss and then Jordan was laughing.

“I can’t believe you thought I’d break-up with you.”

--- ---

The first week wasn’t too terrible, Zack decided. It sucked that he couldn’t eat as much bacon in the morning as he was used to, but that just meant he was given more eggs, hash browns, and toast. He figured it worked out pretty fairly, and Jordan seemed significantly happier about it.

It was only on the first morning that there was no bacon at all did Zack have something of a problem.

“I don’t even get one? Not one?” he’d whined asked. He’d pouted with all he was worth as Jordan shook his head and gave him a sympathetic smile.

“You ate the last of it yesterday, babe. We went over this, remember? I’d portion off all of the meat in the house for you, and once it’s gone, it’s gone. When I go shopping next, I’ll buy you some veggie bacon, okay?”

Honestly, that sounded worse than no bacon at all. How would it taste like bacon? It wouldn’t, that’s how. He knew it wouldn’t.

After that first incident, Zack did his best to save as much of what little meat he had left per meal. It was so difficult. How was he expected to live that way? With only one or two bites of meat here and there? He was living in absolute hell, he was sure of it.

Of course, he never said anything about it. He’d merely put on a strong face, and he’d smile, and he’d choke down the broccoli and carrots and cabbage that Jordan would set in front of him—he wouldn’t bother with the faux meat until he absolutely had to.

He’d told his partner he would become a vegetarian for him, and he was going to stick to that even if it killed him.

He just really hoped it didn’t.

Jordan took notice of his boyfriend’s obvious dilemma. He felt a little cruel, if he was being honest, because sometimes Zack couldn’t contain himself and actually looked distressed about his altered diet. He never even knew what to say to the elder to make the transition easier. The most he could truly offer up were poor attempts at praises and thanks.

While he did feel bad, though, he also found Zack’s determination to be pretty endearing. He knew that the older man would do anything to make him happy—at least, that’s what he’d been told on several different occasions—and the fact that he could actually see that firsthand never failed to have his heart stuttering in his chest.

--- ---

“Zack, can we talk for a second?”

Once again, those words had Zack stopping in his tracks to allow his mind to race. Something about that sentence sounded different than it had the first time, but he just… he couldn’t quite figure out why.

He hummed as he stepped into the kitchen nonetheless, hands lifting to grip at the back of the closest seat so that he’d have something to hold him up if the worst actually came from whatever he had to be told. There was nothing he really hoped for more than for him to be proven wrong a second time.

Jordan had been standing in front of the stove, facing away from his partner, before he turned and sent a small smile to the man across the room from him. He felt terrible about what he was going to do, he honestly did, but he knew that Zack deserved it more than anything.

“I know that this vegetarian thing has been a lot for you to deal with,” he started, taking a few steps closer and then holding both hands over the table for his boyfriend to take, “and I can’t even tell you how proud I am for putting up with both it and me for this past month. I know these last few weeks without any real meat has been especially difficult on you, and I’ve decided that since you’ve been so great to me, I could do something for you, too.

“It’s not much, not compared to how much you’ve already done for me, but I, uh… I got you something.”

Zack wasn’t sure what to expect when Jordan’s hands left his own so that the younger could make his way towards the fridge. The last thing he expected, though, was for a packaged, five-pound, chunk of steak to be lifted into his sight. He’ll forever swear his jaw didn’t drop and that his mouth didn’t water at just the very sight of such a gift.

Jordan felt only slightly disgusted (he’d lived with Zack for quite a while, so he was used to his old eating habits) as he shut the fridge door behind himself and moved to place the packaged item in his hands on the table in front of his boyfriend.

“I figured that maybe asking you to be full-vegetarian isn’t really something you wanted to do, but maybe it’d be easier if I gave you a sort of cheat day. I’m thinking once a month instead of once a week, yeah? You’ll have to cook it, though, and you’ll still have to have some vegetables or something actually healthy with it, okay?”

Zack could almost feel the tears of relief pricking in his eyes as he nodded his head in agreement. The waiting would just make the moment when he could have real steak or pork or ham all the more satisfying.

“You gotta tell me something real fast first, alright?” Jordan was then saying, reaching out to pull the steak towards his side of the table as he awaited his boyfriend’s response. When Zack nodded a second time, he continued. “Did you think I was gonna break-up with you again?”

At that, the older man’s attention moved off to the side. That and the combined shrug told Jordan exactly what he wanted to know. With a shake of the head, he was moving around the table so that he could throw his arms around his partner’s neck and pull their bodies together.

“I still can’t believe you’d think that I’d ever break-up with you.”