Separator
From a Long, Weary Dream
The darkness in the apartment loomed around, stretching only to settle so densely in the corners. Occasionally, bronze squares of light patterned amongst the ceiling as a car would drive by, its motor humming away the sound of distance. Then once more, a black shade painted over the entirety, and again Audrey was left to shrivel in the dusk alone.
At a quarter past midnight, there was a shuffling of feet and jingling of keys echoing from the stairwell that alerted the young woman in bed. Body becoming tense and eyes peering open simultaneously, she awaited the outcome of her hopes. Each tick of a noise made some constriction form in chest, and a pause of breath withstand, but that was the peak to her anticipation. In the next few moments, it became clear that who Audrey longed for turned out to be nothing more than a neighbor coming home late from a long shift at work.
Disappointment closed her now wet eyes, and rattled her throat to emit a gurgle of sorrow. Hand-in-hand a surfeit of emotions plundered down on Audrey, making the depression in the mattress become more immense. Bubbling weeps and shrill whines corrupted the once silent air, but were accepted and eventually muffled out by the vast space of the apartment. Her crying stopped with what she considered to be pathetic hiccups and excessive sniffing. Then turning to see what time elapsed, was she so cynical of herself at the glaring red numbers of her clock, 12:27.
Twelve minutes wasted blubbering in tears.
Twelve minutes cut short from real despair.
Audrey couldn't decide which was more discomfiting of the contradictions, but realized in the end that neither mattered as long as the main point stuck out. She was worsening conditions in a world with not much to mend in the first place. However, not all the blame pointed in her direction. It was his fault, too. Jon contributed to the mess.
There was an increase of gravity felt from a few months ago, caused by him leaving her behind in Canada. All of the attempts reaching out to find an explanation were cut short. His cellphone number and email were changed, his family and friends became unresponsive to her pleas. It was a sudden turn of events so much that Audrey found herself nauseated from everything. Which was why she passed into a bedridden state. Forever awaiting his return.
The confusion stuck through several weeks when there was still not an answer. However, once autumn began, it all fell into place. One night when the television was left on a sports channel, a hockey game caught her attention and specifically a red jersey with the number 19 stitched on its back.
Jon was playing.
His last name was mentioned a dozen times as the period continued to clock out. And each time Audrey felt as if the puck wasn't being shot at the nets, but instead her heart. Realization brought the young woman to the ground with knees buckling together, and denial made a lump form in her throat. She didn't want to accept the truth now that is was revealed, but what little strength left over stood no chance to reject it any longer.
This was why Jon kept his career so private, the reason for always coming home sweaty when all he did was 'go buy groceries.' The bags of food had Audrey tricked, that maybe he liked to jog with them considering not many were ever carried. But it was a sly tactic that steered her away from his secret. His secret of being a prodigal hockey player.
The deception made nights like these habitual, but it still didn't comfort Audrey in any way. Instead, the idea of her loneliness became more defined with every hour of every day. Only when the sun went down was the pain more unbearable.
No strong arms wrapped around her waist in bed that insured protection.
No deep voice to calm her last-minute nerves before sleeping.
No exchanges of love spoken to keep a hope alive of never being alone.
Just separation.
At a quarter past midnight, there was a shuffling of feet and jingling of keys echoing from the stairwell that alerted the young woman in bed. Body becoming tense and eyes peering open simultaneously, she awaited the outcome of her hopes. Each tick of a noise made some constriction form in chest, and a pause of breath withstand, but that was the peak to her anticipation. In the next few moments, it became clear that who Audrey longed for turned out to be nothing more than a neighbor coming home late from a long shift at work.
Disappointment closed her now wet eyes, and rattled her throat to emit a gurgle of sorrow. Hand-in-hand a surfeit of emotions plundered down on Audrey, making the depression in the mattress become more immense. Bubbling weeps and shrill whines corrupted the once silent air, but were accepted and eventually muffled out by the vast space of the apartment. Her crying stopped with what she considered to be pathetic hiccups and excessive sniffing. Then turning to see what time elapsed, was she so cynical of herself at the glaring red numbers of her clock, 12:27.
Twelve minutes wasted blubbering in tears.
Twelve minutes cut short from real despair.
Audrey couldn't decide which was more discomfiting of the contradictions, but realized in the end that neither mattered as long as the main point stuck out. She was worsening conditions in a world with not much to mend in the first place. However, not all the blame pointed in her direction. It was his fault, too. Jon contributed to the mess.
There was an increase of gravity felt from a few months ago, caused by him leaving her behind in Canada. All of the attempts reaching out to find an explanation were cut short. His cellphone number and email were changed, his family and friends became unresponsive to her pleas. It was a sudden turn of events so much that Audrey found herself nauseated from everything. Which was why she passed into a bedridden state. Forever awaiting his return.
The confusion stuck through several weeks when there was still not an answer. However, once autumn began, it all fell into place. One night when the television was left on a sports channel, a hockey game caught her attention and specifically a red jersey with the number 19 stitched on its back.
Jon was playing.
His last name was mentioned a dozen times as the period continued to clock out. And each time Audrey felt as if the puck wasn't being shot at the nets, but instead her heart. Realization brought the young woman to the ground with knees buckling together, and denial made a lump form in her throat. She didn't want to accept the truth now that is was revealed, but what little strength left over stood no chance to reject it any longer.
This was why Jon kept his career so private, the reason for always coming home sweaty when all he did was 'go buy groceries.' The bags of food had Audrey tricked, that maybe he liked to jog with them considering not many were ever carried. But it was a sly tactic that steered her away from his secret. His secret of being a prodigal hockey player.
The deception made nights like these habitual, but it still didn't comfort Audrey in any way. Instead, the idea of her loneliness became more defined with every hour of every day. Only when the sun went down was the pain more unbearable.
No strong arms wrapped around her waist in bed that insured protection.
No deep voice to calm her last-minute nerves before sleeping.
No exchanges of love spoken to keep a hope alive of never being alone.
Just separation.
♠ ♠ ♠
Just a little something written for my Creative Writing class (but they don't know it's fan fiction) ;)I never seem to write very romantic scenes with my hockey fics, but oh well! Maybe some day. Life's not about kissing all the time, y'know? hahaha!
Also, sorry Jon turned out to be a meanie in this one- I'll try not to do that again to him~
Hope you enjoyed :)